When It Don't Come Easy
by HandsThatHeal
Summary: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they simply don't have what it takes to carry on as a family. (Repost)
1. Chapter 1

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **This story was originally posted before the premiere of Season 9. After many requests to repost it, I am now in the middle of editing the entire story and plan to repost it a chapter at a time.

**AN2: **I will admit that there are quite a few changes - not enough to make the content or central plot of the story different - but just enough to make it a better and easier read. At least, in my opinion. From re-reading, I can definitely tell that I have matured as a writer since the beginning of this story.

**AN3: **Anyway, thanks so much for your continued interest in this story, and I really hope it doesn't disappoint the second time around. Thanks again!

* * *

_**Chapter One**_

* * *

"Come on, Arizona. You can do this," Dr. Calliope Torres quietly muttered, knees nervously bouncing as she sat alone in the back row of the observation deck of OR Two. "Come on, come on, come on."

Callie sighed and, leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees, she pressed her palms together, placing them firmly against her lips and nose, purposely sending a silent prayer to anyone who would listen that Arizona would rock this surgery.

With a shake of her head as her eyes continued to watch her wife standing motionless over the tiny human lying supine on the OR table in front of her, Callie knew - deep down - she shouldn't be watching. She knew she should be finishing the last of her discharge summaries so she could pick up Sofia from day care and make her way home.

Callie also knew that if Arizona caught her keeping this solitary vigil over a simple laparoscopic surgical repair for pyloric stenosis, she may regret the volatile chain reaction that could only describe her wife's recently acquired temper. Deep down, she knew she was being more than a little overprotective of her wife, but she just couldn't help herself - she simply could not seem to find the fortitude to physically remove herself from the room.

Because, Arizona was struggling, and Callie knew it.

Staring down at the back of her wife's pink butterfly scrub cap, Callie noted that Arizona's posture no longer portrayed the confidence of an accomplished pediatric surgeon, and her gloved hands no longer confidently embraced the cold steel of the surgical devices necessary to free this tiny one-month-old baby boy of the constant hunger he had been experiencing since birth.

In all likelihood, to any other onlooker, Dr. Arizona Robbins probably appeared perfectly self-assured in her surgical skills. Callie, however, had been observing Arizona's surgeries for close to four years now and was keenly aware of the fact that the Head of Pediatric Surgery at Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital was no longer the same clear, rational, and simply miraculous surgeon she had once been.

The change was nearly imperceptible but, as she once again noticed Arizona uncomfortably shift from one leg to the other, Callie quickly stood from her seat, tugging her cell phone from her pocket as she rushed from the observation deck and into the hallway. Quickly paging Dr. Alex Karev to OR Two, Callie hurried the short distance to await his arrival outside the scrub room of the surgical suite.

Leaning back against the institutional white block wall, Callie crossed her arms over her chest and squeezed her eyes shut as she puffed her cheeks to blow out an unsteadily exaggerated breath and, thinking back on the events of the last five months, she harshly struck the back of her head against the wall that now supported her weight.

How could she have been so deluded? How could she have been so insanely, over the moon happy about the state of her life just five months before when now. . .

Well now, she was once again nothing short of miserable. She still stood by the passionate monologue she had delivered to Alex Karev, April Kepner, and Jackson Avery all those months ago, because. . .

Life really did change in an instant. It really did turn on a dime. She really had met the most amazing woman, and she really was in love.

Why then, the misery? Why, the uncertainty? And, why the uncompromising indecision surrounding every aspect of her life with this amazing woman?

Callie knew the answers to these questions. The answers were actually quite simple. The answers to each individual one of these nagging inquiries were all the same. . .

Because, a plane fell out of the sky.

Because, a plane fell out of the sky and brutally and fatally landed on the cold hard ground in the middle of the Cascade Mountains somewhere between Seattle and Boise.

Ironically, this was the same plane that had fallen out of the sky and taken the life of Sofia's father.

And quite contemptuously, this was the same fucking plane that had fallen out of the fucking sky and damaged Arizona - her wife - this amazing woman. Damaged and crippled her so tremendously - so scathingly - both physically and emotionally that Callie feared that she had lost her wife.

Forever.

Heavy footsteps down the hall pulled Callie from the incessant thoughts that had been plaguing her since that fateful day just five months before.

"What the Hell, Torres? Again?" Alex Karev shouted as he edged closer to her. "What's wrong? You paged 911!"

Callie shook her head, swallowing hard. "It's Arizona. She's been in there for hours, Alex," Callie stated as she quickly followed him into the scrub room. "She's just not. . ."

"She's just not what, Calliope?"

Callie's gaze shot up at the sound of the unexpected, but familiar voice, just as she ungracefully ran into the back of Alex who had stopped abruptly in the middle of the scrub room.

"She's - _I'm_ \- just not what, Calliope?" Arizona impatiently asked again as she dried her hands on a blue surgical towel, her tone icily cold, the look in her clear blue eyes even more glacial than the contempt in her words.

At that moment, Callie felt strangely relieved that Alex was still standing between herself and the obviously increasingly irate blonde, though her relief was short lived when Alex quickly stepped to the side to allow Arizona two forced and unsteady steps forward.

"Arizona, you're. . .I'm. . ."

Callie trailed off, lowering her eyes from Arizona's piercing glare, unsure of how to continue. She knew that anything she had to say would most likely be ill received - just like everything else she had tried to do lately for her wife - and, she certainly wasn't going to have this same discussion with her wife - in front of Alex Karev - yet again.

Ever since Arizona had returned to the surgical schedule two weeks prior, a very similar series of events had begun, and then relentlessly continued to occur - all of which included Arizona being _visited_ in the middle of each and every procedure she was slated to perform by either Callie or Alex, and even once by an overly concerned Miranda Bailey.

Each of these staged visits held exactly the same unease, all accompanied by these people's incessant questions and disquiet concern; each and every visit making her feel more and more incompetent that the last, unintentionally carving away at what little tolerance she had left for Callie's overprotection, Alex's guilt, and Bailey's. . .

Arizona wasn't completely sure where Miranda's interest was coming from, but she could almost bet her next paycheck that - during the times she'd been visited by Miranda Bailey - Callie and Alex were probably otherwise detained with a surgery or patient, choosing to send Bailey, by proxy.

Today, however, the Head of Pediatric Surgery thought she had been able to escape her wife and friends' unwanted scrutiny when no one had barged into _her_ OR with what she felt was ridiculous apprehension. Now, though, here she stood in the middle of the scrub room, the ache in her left thigh unwavering, as she irritably awaited her wife, or her new fellow, to shut their damn mouths that lay agape with shock in surprise long enough to make words.

After a long and highly uncomfortable silence, Alex glanced down at his watch and was then the first to speak. "Everything go ok in there, Robbins? Did you run into complications?" he knowingly asked. And, then looking from his watch to his boss when she didn't speak, he chose to continue, even though Arizona's glare dared him to. "The board said your surgery started at 1:30pm. It's almost 4:00pm, now. That surgery should only take thirty minutes - an hour at the most."

Arizona's eyes darted between Alex and Callie, who remained dejectedly quiet, her eyes staring only at the floor. "Mind your own business, Karev," the blonde warningly huffed. "I don't need you to tell me how long my surgeries should last, and I certainly do not need you. . ." she glared at him pointedly, "or you. . ." she stared at Callie until she reluctantly returned her gaze, "or Miranda _freakin_' Bailey, checking up on me every time I set foot in an OR. I'm not a child, and I'm tired of both of you treating me like one!"

Callie swallowed hard, so devastated by the profound emptiness and irrational anger she found in her wife's once sparkling and emotive blue eyes, that tears instantly brimmed in her own exhausted brown eyes.

"Arizona, I-I'm not treating you like a child, I just. . ."

"You are!" Arizona's yelled, her voice wavering slightly as she tried to hold back the torrent of emotion that threatened to spill forth. "Why can't you just believe me when I tell you that I. Am. Fine!"

"Because you aren't _FINE_, Arizona!" Callie instantly shot back, throwing her hands into the air, and then harshly smacking her palms against the sides of her hips. "Nothing about any of this is _FINE!" _she shouted, now completely unable to hold back her irritation or the drips of moisture that made their way past the dam of her eyelids to trickle down her cheeks. "I-I'm going to get Sofia," she quickly added, needed to remove herself from this situation before she completely broke down. "I-I'll be back to get you when your shift ends."

And, with that, Callie tore open the scrub room door and was gone.

Arizona gripped the edge of the stainless steel sink, her head dejectedly falling between her shoulders as she closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. Shaking her head, she then moved toward the door, debating whether or not she should try to stop her wife or just let her go.

"When the Hell are you gonna cut the crap, Robbins?"

Alex's words quickly invaded Arizona's mind, halting the uncertainty she felt toward her next move.

"You've been treating Torres like shit ever since that damn plane crashed, and I don't have the slightest idea why she continues to put up with you!"

Arizona shook her head, exhaling slowly. "I don't need this right now, Alex," Arizona sternly stated, reaching for the handle of the scrub room door.

Alex's initial thought was to just let her go but, deciding to just say his piece, he briskly stalked toward her. "You know what?!" he nearly shouted, his anger rising as he grabbed Arizona's hand from the door and spun her to face him. "I think you do need this! Right now!"

Alex had been silently watching his mentor self-destruct since the moment she was transferred back to SGMW from Boise Memorial, and he had uncharacteristically kept his mouth shut, trying hard to respect her feelings and emotions, but this was getting ridiculous.

It had gone on long enough.

"This is all your fault, you know," he began more gently, trying to curtail his earlier animosity. "If you would have just pulled your stubborn head out of your ass long enough to let me go to Boise like I was supposed to, you wouldn't be dealing with this gigantic shit storm right now!"

"Karev. . ."

"No! Just shut the hell up for once and listen to me," he immediately interrupted. "Because I've been listening to you spew the same self-righteous bullshit for the past five months, and I'm over it. Torres is right, Robbins! You _aren't_ fine!"

Alex then paused, wondering if he should continue but, realizing he had already gone too far to stop now, he quickly carried on. "Callie has been trying her damnedest here, Robbins, but you just won't let her. So, you've got a fucked up leg!" he angrily spat, his own irritation now outweighing the guilt he still felt. "So what! Get over it. At least you're still alive!"

Arizona's eyes went wide at the candor of his tirade. "You think I don't realize that?" came her haughty retort. "You think I don't know what Callie has done?" she shouted, a sardonic bark of laughter leaving her throat. "Trust me, Alex, I am very aware of the fact that I am alive!"

"So get over yourself, then!" he argued, unwilling to hold back now. "Suck it up and realize that you got a free pass. From God - or whoever. For some reason you're still here!"

"But why?" she yelled, tears now welling in her bright blue eyes. "Why am I still here, and Lexie is not? Why and I still here, a-a-and _Mark_ is not!?"

Alex momentarily considered her last statement before realizing the inscrutable significance of her words. "You think you don't deserve to be here, and he does?" he asked, his brow furrowing in surprise at the meaning of her revelation. "You think Callie and Sofia need _him_ more than they need _you_?" he asked, quickly realizing the answers to his inquiries. "You think Torres resents you for _living_?"

"How could she not?" Arizona asked, her tone completely dejected.

"Are you fucking serious?" Alex exclaimed into the thick silence of the room.

Arizona remained quiet, wholeheartedly _not_ wanting to admit to the thoughts and fears that had been plaguing her mind ever since she sat in the middle of the mountain wilderness stroking Mark's hair and begging him to stay with her so they could both go home together to Callie and Sofia. And, at that point, Mark had held on. They had gone home together. But, they weren't all together, now. Mark had been unable to hang on for the duration and had succumbed to complications of the cardiac tamponade he'd suffered.

"I'm scared, Alex," Arizona finally spoke, her voice barely above a hushed whisper.

Searching her protégé's face, Arizona expected him to respond but, when he didn't, she realized he was waiting for her to elaborate. Then, squeezing her eyes shut in an attempt to hold back the tears that threatened to fall, she shook her head, completely embarrassed and ashamed of the words that were about to slip from her mouth.

"Mark was always there. From the very beginning of my relationship with Callie. . .he was _always_ there. Even when I didn't want him to be, he was still there. A-and now. . .he's not. He's _gone_," Arizona stated with a caustic chuckle through her tears. "I wanted him to be gone for so long, and now that he is. . .I'm scared. All the time. I'm scared that I'm not enough for them, and I'm scared that I no longer have any idea how to be Sofia's mom and Callie's wife."

Arizona then searched Alex's face for a reaction to her words and, watching as his forehead scrunched in question or confusion or. . ._something_, she was sure he was staring at her like she had a penis growing directly out of her forehead.

"Are you crazy, Robbins?" Alex asked, his face scowling. "Did you fuck up your head when you fell out of that plane, too?"

Alex smirked as Arizona's lips slightly twitched into a crooked smile. "You don't need Mark Sloan around to determine your place as Sofia's mother and Callie's wife," he stated, his concern uncharacteristically heartfelt, but complete sincere. "Yeah, he was your daughter's father, but that's it. You are that little girl's whole world, Robbins. I've seen how happy she is with you. And you are dumb as Hell if you believe for one minute that Torres doesn't think you are the best thing that has ever happened to her. Or some other butterflies and rainbow crap like that," he added as an afterthought.

Through her tears, Arizona let out a sharp laugh at Alex's memory, causing him to compassionately smile at his mentor. And, then placing his hands on her shoulders, he continued. "Look, Robbins. I was here when Torres found out your plane was missing. For a while, I couldn't tell if she was going to punch Hunt, scream and cry, or puke on my shoes. But, once it all sank in, once she was able to focus, _you_ were her only concern. It wasn't until Avery mentioned something about Mark that he even entered her mind."

Arizona's tearful blue eyes registered complete surprise at Alex's admission and, she hated to admit it, but that knowledge somehow made her feel better.

"You need to talk to Callie, Robbins. She's hurting, too," Alex added before Arizona had time to respond. "You really need to stop blaming her because, trust me, she already blames herself enough for the both of you. And, please, stop trying to pretend that you're fine, because no matter what you think, we all know that you're still struggling. And, we all love you too much to watch you to continue to suffer."

Alex's words momentarily caught Arizona off guard. She was sure he cared for her, or he would have chosen to go to Johns Hopkins instead of staying behind to fill the void she had created during her time off following the crash.

But, love?

That was a completely unexpected emotion from him and an even more astonishing revelation from the usually sardonic younger doctor.

"When did you become so human?" Arizona asked, a truly genuine smile now gracing her face.

Alex chuckled. "Well, everyone knows we have _you_ to thank for that."

Continuing to smile, Arizona leaned forward to quickly embrace him. "Thank you, Alex," she said into his shoulder before quickly pulling away.

"Whatever."

With that, Alex pulled open the door before quickly exiting the room.

Now standing alone in the scrub room, Arizona closed her eyes as she considered what to do. She hated to admit it, but Alex Karev was right and, quickly reminded of a similar humbling conversation she'd had with Mark Sloan not so many years before, Arizona sighed.

She couldn't believe it - she had promised Callie and herself that she wouldn't - but, the truth was, she'd done it again.

Arizona Robbins had bailed.

Not in the physical sense, because she was, in fact, still there. Still with Callie. Still with Sofia. But she had withdrawn from them both emotionally, and she absolutely hated herself for it.

But, Callie had kept her heartfelt promise. She hadn't gone anywhere, even though Arizona had withdrawn from her and their daughter out of fear of their rejection. Emotionally, however, she had bailed, leaving Callie with the responsibility of doing everything she could not.

At that moment, Arizona Robbins became acutely aware that she needed to reclaim her life. She needed to pull herself up out of the pit of Hell she had been living in for the past five months.

She needed to talk to Callie.

* * *

**AN4: **There should be one chapter (or more) posted a day until this story is complete. After that, I will be moving on to Ready to Love Again in order to edit and repost it. Thank you so much for taking the time to read or re-read this chapter, and I hope you enjoyed it. Reviews are always welcome. If you think this story is worth reposting, let me know. If not, I would like to know that, as well. Thanks again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thank you all for your kind words concerning the re-post of this story. I will try to get it edited and posted as quickly as possible.

* * *

_**Chapter Two**_

* * *

"I was hoping for a month. Maybe two," Callie stated, looking up from her hands that rested in her lap to meet the concerned gaze of the Chief of Surgery.

Owen sighed at the request. "I don't know, Torres," he replied, leaning back against the front of his desk. "Arizona was already off work for close to four months, and I highly doubt the board will approve such a lengthy leave of absence when she has only just returned."

Callie shook her head, frustration evident in her eyes and in the tense set of her shoulders. "It's not like she _chose_ to be off work!" she exclaimed as she quickly rose from her seat. "She wasn't just screwing around and neglecting her responsibilities. She nearly died, Owen. . ."

Callie trailed off, the mere thought of losing Arizona causing knots to twist in her already aching stomach and tears to brim in her defeated brown eyes. "Arizona nearly died because of her loyalty to _this_ hospital, and I think the least this place can do is allow her an extended leave of absence until she is truly ready to return to work."

Owen gently nodded his head, obvious concern evident in his own blue eyes. "I agree with you, Torres. One hundred percent. But, I'm not sure the board is going to see it that way," he carefully contended, desperately trying to remain the Chief of Surgery and not someone who had been through the exact same thing Callie was going through right now. "How am I supposed to explain to them that not only are we losing our Head of Pediatric Surgery for the next couple months, but also, the best damn Orthopedic Surgeon in this hospital, as well?"

Callie covered her face with her hands, shaking her head and, then bringing her fingers to her temples, she rubbed them roughly, trying to ward off the ever present ache that had settled there.

"I really wish that was true," Callie scoffed, adamantly refusing to meet Owen's gaze.

Owen found himself confused by her response and, searching her face for an explanation, his expression softened when he saw the glistening of tears trickle down her face. "None of this is your fault, Torres. No one blames you."

Finally forcing herself to look at her boss, Callie's shoulders slumped as she shoved her hands into the pockets of her starched white lab coat. "Well, _I_ blame myself," she matter-of-factly huffed before quickly turning and heading toward his office door.

Pausing at the door, Callie immediately reached for the knob, but suddenly stopped before turning it. "Look, Owen," she said, slowly turning to face him. "I don't care what you say to the board. Hell, I don't care if _I'm_ out of a job when I get back. But, they have to allow Arizona this time. She deserves it. She needs it. More than she knows. "

Carefully stepping away from his desk, Owen briefly considered the ramifications of his next words.

"Go," he then insisted, his voice breaking the silence that had befallen the room. "I'll take care of the board."

* * *

An hour later, Callie stood with her elbows leaning against the kitchen island of the apartment she shared with her wife and daughter, smiling softly as she watched Sofia stack a mountain of blocked in the middle of the living room floor.

"I know I didn't have to tell you, daddy, but I just didn't want you to be surprised," Callie said into the telephone held between her shoulder and the side of her face.

"_The money is yours, Mija,_" Carlos replied on the other end of the phone. "_Use it as you wish_."

Callie sighed, nodding her head. "Thank you, daddy. I just hope this helps," she earnestly stated. "Because, I've honestly never felt so useless in my entire life."

"_Oh, Mija_. _I'm sure you're doing just fine_" Carlos gently replied, hating to hear his daughter sound so dejected. "_I have never known a more loving and caring person in my life. Arizona is very lucky to have you_."

"I'm very lucky to have her, daddy," Callie immediately admitted through the tears that lately never seemed to be absent from her eyes. "But, I - lately - I just. . .I can't tell if she cares if I live or die."

"_Calliope_. . ."

Hearing a beep interrupt whatever her father was about to say, Callie glanced at the screen. "Daddy, Arizona's on the other line. I have to go."

"_Okay, Mija,_" Carlos stated. "_Please remember that I love you, okay? And, please, try not to lose hope_."

Callie smiled through her tears before quickly swiping her fingertips against the dampness on her face. "I love you, too, daddy. I'll call you soon."

Swiping her thumb across the touch screen to quickly switch to the other line, Callie once again haphazardly wiped at her eyes as she cleared her throat. "Hey, sweetie," she answered, her tone not quite exuding the happiness she'd wanted to portray. "You ready?"

"_I'll be ready in about an hour. I just wanted to give you a heads up_," Arizona answered, not fooled by the faulty saccharine of her wife's voice. She knew she was the reason Callie sounded like that - that she was the person who was quite literally breaking the other woman's heart - and, knowing she needed to start somewhere, she decided to ask. "_You ok, Calliope_?"

Callie didn't immediately respond, shocked by the question; it had been months since Arizona had shown any real concern for her. "Umm. . .yeah. I-I'm good," she lied, surreptitiously glancing toward the digital numbers on the microwave behind her. "I need to run a couple errands before I get you. I should have time, but I may end up being a few minutes late. Is that okay?" she asked, anxiously wanting to change the subject.

"_That's fine_," Arizona honestly replied. "_Or, I could just walk_."

"You're not walking, Arizona. . ." Callie immediately scolded, irritation seeping into her voice.

They'd engaged in this argument several times since Arizona's return to work the month before. Arizona had initially been enraged by Callie's insistence upon driving the short distance between the hospital and their apartment to either take her to work or pick her up but, exhausted by their constant disagreements and realizing this was not a battle she was likely ever going to win, Arizona had reluctantly conceded.

"_It was just a suggestion, Callie_," Arizona huffed into the phone. "_I wasn't trying to start an argument. In fact, I'm really, REALLY tired of arguing with you_."

Callie closed her eyes, breathing in through her nose and exhaling from her mouth. "Me, too," Callie softly agreed but, quickly changing the subject, she continued, the false harmony instantly returning to her voice. "Okay, then. So, I'll be there in about an hour."

"_Okay_," Arizona replied and, after a brief pause, she then added, "_I love you, Callie._"

Callie smiled, despite the trepidation she felt in the face of every interaction she had with her wife.

"Me too."

* * *

Painfully limping out the hospital's front doors, Arizona looked to the sky, breathing deeply in appreciation of the brisk fall air, before settling herself onto a nearby bench. Taking a quiet moment to gather her thoughts, she pondered where to even begin, carefully considering the best way to express her feelings to her wife.

The constant unease Arizona now felt in Callie's presence was something she had never experienced in the nearly four years they had been together and, eminently aware that she was the only person who could possibly remedy this discomfort, Arizona sighed, once again looking up into the night sky.

When exactly had things gotten so out of hand?

When had everything become so hard?

When had she become so damn exhausted - physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

"What am I doing?" Arizona asked the vast expanse of the universe above.

"Sounds like you're talking to herself like a crazy person, if you ask me," came a sarcastic response, tearing through the uncharacteristic silence of the entrance of Seattle Grace Mercy West.

Haltingly looking from the sky toward the intruder, Arizona smirked as the shorter surgeon approached.

"I've been doing lots of crazy stuff lately," Arizona scoffed as Miranda Bailey took a seat next to her on the bench. "Karev thinks I screwed up my head even worse than my leg."

Miranda regarded her former mentor with concern and empathy written across her every feature. "You waiting for Callie?" she matter-of-factly asked, choosing to move past the subject at hand as she looked out into the hospital's parking lot.

Arizona simply nodded, bracing both hands on either side of her hips, leaning forward in an attempt to find a more comfortable position.

Noticing the grimace on the blonde's face, Miranda started to ask if her leg was still bothering her, but quickly thought better of it. The answer to that particular question was flagrantly apparent in Arizona's every move.

So, considering her words as she studied an ivory profile, Miranda shook her head before she spoke. "These kinds of things shouldn't happen to nice people," she simply stated.

Curiously glancing toward her co-worker with questioning eyes, Arizona started to speak, but was quickly interrupted.

"You and Callie have the biggest hearts. Bigger than anyone I know. And, yet, you've had to deal with more crap in the past couple years than any one couple should ever have to in their entire lifetime," Miranda elaborated, closing her eyes and shaking her head. "Car crashes, plane crashes. . ." She trailed off, opening her eyes as she cautiously watched the woman seated beside her.

Arizona ruefully smiled before turning her eyes from the scrutiny of Miranda's concerned gaze.

"I love them more than anything," Arizona whispered, though she wasn't sure where exactly that statement had come from. "Callie and Sofia, I mean. They are the dream I didn't even know I had. But, now - I'm - I just don't even know where to begin, or what to do."

The general surgeon leaned forward on the bench, gently placing a hand on Arizona's shoulder, both women considering their thoughts for several long, silent moments.

Then, looking toward Bailey, Arizona patted the hand on her shoulder with her own. "I. . ."

The Peds Surgeon's words were immediately cut off by the blaring of a horn from somewhere in the parking lot and, turning her head toward the offensive noise, fully expecting to see Callie in their SUV, Arizona's eyes continued to search the rows and rows of parked cars, the search for her wife proving futile.

As the horn continued to sound, Miranda quickly stood, strutting toward the parking lot with Arizona close behind. "What kind of fool honks their horn all the way through a damn hospital parking lot at almost 10 o'clock at night?" Miranda grumbled.

Finally spotting the source of the commotion, both women halted in shock, staring with their mouths agape at the sleek black RV quickly approaching.

"What the Hell?" Miranda quipped as the giant vehicle rolled to a stop along the curb in front of them.

Almost immediately, the door of the enormous recreation vehicle swung open to reveal a stunning Latina bounding down the steps to land on the sidewalk with a flourish, a megawatt smile gracing her face as she took in the stupefied looks of the two women standing in front of her.

"Hey!" Callie cheerfully greeted, joyful eyes locking with the confused ones of her wife.

"Wh-what? What the Hell is that?" Arizona asked as Callie stepped closer to her. "And, where's Sofia?"

Filling the last bit of space between them, Callie took Arizona's hands into hers and, briefly glancing toward Miranda, Callie was suddenly overcome with the same unease she'd felt in her wife's presence for the past several months. And, with her confident smile fading, Callie carefully considered the reassuring nod of Miranda's head before turning back toward her wife, tanned fingers nervously spinning the wedding band on Arizona's left hand.

"Arizona. . ." Callie nervously began, looking up from their joined hands and into curious cerulean eyes. "_This_ is an RV, and Sofia is asleep inside," she dumbly answered, motioning with her head toward the behemoth vehicle behind her.

When Arizona didn't respond, Callie sighed, closing her eyes as she tried mightily to collect her thoughts. "I love you, Arizona," Callie insisted, opening her own eyes to gaze into the blue ones she adored. "I love you so much, and it kills me to see you in so much pain. I've allowed you to withdraw a-a-and to struggle for _way_ too long."

"Callie. . ."

"No, please! Please. Just let me finish," Callie interrupted, squeezing her wife's hands. "We were happy. So, so happy. Then. . .Nick. Then the plane and Mark and. . .your leg. . ." Callie trailed off, fighting back tears. "It's never been easy for us, Arizona. I know that. But, lately, it's just been so, _so _hard."

Upon hearing her wife's honest, yet tentative words, Arizona retracted her hands, stepping back and looking toward the ground, hurt and regret rising in her chest.

Watching as her wife remorsefully drew away from her, Callie's eyes immediately widened with frustration and fear upon feeling her wife's absence and, glancing from the blonde's downturned head toward her friend, Callie hoped to somehow find the strength necessary to continue.

Upon receiving a scornful, but supportive glare from Miranda Bailey, Callie cleared her throat, steadying herself to continue.

Obstinately stepping back into her wife's space, Callie grabbed Arizona's wrists and pulled her close. Then, placing a hand under Arizona's chin, Callie lifted her head to meet her gaze.

"Look at me," Callie insisted when Arizona's attention remained everywhere but on her. "Look. At. Me."

When tearful blue eyes finally reached her chocolate ones, Callie smiled, bending her knees to stand at the same level as her wife. "We're going away for a while, Arizona. You, me, and Sofia. We're taking this big ass bus, and we're leaving Seattle," she softly insisted.

Arizona searched Callie's face for further explanation, but when none came, she shrugged. "I have patients, Callie. You have patients. . ."

"Nope. . .no patients," Callie proudly replied. "Owen has granted both of us an extended leave of absence. For at least a month, maybe two."

Arizona adamantly shook her head, feeling completely ganged up on. "But, I didn't ask for time off, Callie!" the blonde immediately interrupted, the hurt she had been experiencing suddenly turning to unfettered annoyance.

"Arizona. . ."

The blonde's Type A personality, along with the anger she now constantly seemed to harbor immediately took hold of her already fragile emotional state, as she once again pulled away from her wife. "I'm not going anywhere, Callie!" she hostilely continued, her tone rising in volume and pitch. "I have responsibilities. I can't just leave. . ."

"Yes, you can, boss," Alex Karev interrupted, walking up behind the three female surgeons to stand next to Miranda.

Arizona turned to face him, feeling completely claustrophobic. "Karev. . ."

"What?" he shrugged almost sheepishly, in an attempt to diffuse his mentor's anger. "We can handle everything here," he then added, giving her a warning glare.

"Please, Arizona," Callie begged. "We need this. We need this time to figure things out. To decide where we go from here."

Arizona stubbornly shook her head, awkwardly turning to walk away.

But, before she made it very far, her anger got the better of her, causing her to halt mid retreat. "Why?" she yelled, spinning around to face the other three. And, then stalking toward Callie, her irritation continued to rise with each word she spoke. "Why are you doing this to me, Callie? Why? Haven't you already done enough?!"

Callie recoiled at the vehemence in Arizona's words, looking as though she had just been slapped.

Taking in the guilt and sadness in her wife's eyes, Arizona immediately softened, instantly regretting the presence of such unwarranted anger present in her harsh words. "No, Calliope. I'm sorry."

A tear trickled down Callie's cheek as she ruefully nodded her head and, quickly brushing it away in an attempt to steady herself, Callie changed tactics, speaking even further from her heard. "Look, Arizona. We need to get away from here for a while," she stated and, after a brief pause, her face then took on a look of sheer determination and strength. "I'm going. I'm taking Sofia, and I'm going. With or without you. I just can't do this. I can't be here. Not anymore. Not right now."

Arizona flinched, her mouth falling open in shock. "Wh-what?" she asked, clearly stunned. "You - you're leaving? You. . .you. . .promised me, Callie. You promised you weren't going anywhere!"

Alex and Miranda looked between the two feuding wives, both clearly confused.

Callie, however, knew exactly the promise Arizona was referring to and, letting out a bark of sardonic laughter, she glared at her wife, shaking her head.

"No!" Callie shouted, seemingly unconscious of her surroundings. "You do _NOT_ get to throw that in my face," she spewed, the unwavering patience she had maintained with her wife no longer present. "I'm not trying to leave you, Arizona! I just asked you to come with me! Damn it!" Callie cursed, angry at Arizona, but even more angry at herself for losing her patience. "I _HAVE_ been here for you! Every single day. I've been here. But, I can't - I can't do it anymore. I can't be here for you. I can't do what you need me to do! Not if you won't let me!" Callie concluded, immediately rushing away from the three stunned surgeons before she became completely consumed by the urge she felt to hit something.

Pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes in an attempt to reign in her emotions, Callie fought the oppressive urge she felt to climb back into the vehicle and drive away. Deciding against it, she then turned back toward her wife one final time, looking directly into her wide, startled azure eyes.

"I'm going to ask you one more time to come with me, Arizona," Callie offered, her voice lowering, her face softening. "I did this for _you_, and I don't want to go without you. But I will. I'll go alone if I have to."

Alex and Miranda looked between their colleagues, both shocked at hearing the flood of emotions that had just come spilling forth from the brunette woman's lips. Callie had purposely staged their presence here tonight but, at this point, neither was sure of how to assist her in convincing Arizona to go along with her plan. If what she had just said - if the intensity behind her sheer honesty wasn't enough to convince Arizona, they weren't sure what was.

Reluctantly stepping forward, Alex opened his mouth to speak, but Miranda quickly grabbed his arm, intercepting his attempt when she saw Arizona raise her head to gaze between Callie and the shiny RV. "Shhhh. . ."

"Please. . ." Callie softly beseeched, her hand reaching for her wife. "Please. Come with me."

Arizona shifted from one leg to the other, her right hand fiddling with the strap of the bag that hung from her shoulder. And, as her gaze darted from the door of the RV to the strained face of her wife, she exhaled a ragged breath before turning away from her love to step toward Miranda and Alex who stood a few feet away.

Regarding Arizona's retreat as her decision to stay in Seattle, Callie slowly lowered her proffered hand, internally berating herself for losing her temper so ruthlessly in such a public setting. "Arizona. . ." she breathed out as more tears sprung to her eyes. And, with her heart breaking into a million pieces, she dejectedly turned toward the RV in an attempt to escape this Hell she had been living .

"Don't disappoint me, Karev."

Callie stopped suddenly upon hearing Arizona's words.

"I'm entrusting you with the lives of the tiny humans."

Callie slowly turned, shocked by what she had just heard, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"That's not something I take lightly," Arizona reiterated. "When I get back - and I _will_ be back - I better be able to pick up as if I never left. You understand?"

Alex regarded Arizona with confusion, pondering how Callie had been able to tolerate such emotional instability from his mentor for so very long. "I got it, Robbins," he finally smirked. "I learned from the best."

Arizona nodded, pressing her lips tightly together in consternation and, slowly turning, she then tiredly staggered toward the RV, irritably brushing past Callie without a word.

Reaching for the door handle, Arizona tugged on it, but in vain and, relentlessly yanking the handle to no avail, she then kicked the front tire like a spoiled 6-year-old. "Well, let's go, Callie!" she irritably huffed with an exaggerated roll of her eyes as she repeatedly tugged at the door. "How the Hell do I get into this damn thing, anyway?"

"Easy. Easy. Be gentle with her!" Callie gently scolded with an amused grin, opening the door with one smooth motion.

Watching as Arizona pouted her way into the RV, Alex shook his head, smirking at his mentor's antics as Miranda winked with a small smile and a thumbs up in Callie's direction.

"Thank you," Callie appreciatively mouthed before disappearing up the stairs and behind the door.

"I totally thought one of them was gonna go all cage fighter on the other," Alex admitted, closely watching the RV door, expecting to see one of the women come flying out the door and onto her ass.

"Those two are the most headstrong, stubborn, pig-headed women I've ever met," Miranda added.

"You think they're gonna be okay?" Alex asked as they watched the mammoth RV slowly pull away from the hospital lot.

Sighing, Miranda answered with complete honesty. "I think they have to be. They were made for each other. . ."

* * *

Entering the cabin of the RV, Callie immediately took her seat behind the wheel, purposely averting her gaze and paying little attention to her wife. "Arizona, I. . ."

"Holy shit, Callie!" Arizona called, causing the Latina to literally jump upon hearing the stunned exclamation. "This thing is bigger than our apartment."

Shocked by the merriment present in her wife's tone, Callie laughed as she navigated the RV out of the parking lot of SGMW and onto the main road. "Well, we're going to be spending a lot of time in here, so I thought we should be comfortable."

Arizona momentarily stared at the back of her wife's head before stepping forward to take the seat next to her. Looking out the front window, Arizona then sighed before staring down at her hands as they nervously fidgeted in her lap.

"Thank you, Callie," Arizona softly stated after several long moments, finally looking toward her wife with unshed tears gathering in her eyes.

Glancing in the blonde's direction, Callie smiled, simply nodding her head before directing her attention back to the road.

They remained silent for some time, Callie concentrating on driving as Arizona perused one of the many sightseeing maps her wife had brought along for their trip.

"So, where to, captain?" Arizona asked after several long moments, her voice breaking the silence.

Quickly flicking her attention in Arizona's direction, Callie smiled. "Wherever you want," she honestly answered.

"You mean you don't know where we're going?" Arizona incredulously asked.

A soft chuck left Callie's lips at the sight of Arizona's comically wide blue eyes. "I made a plan," Callie defended, suddenly worried her wife's cheerful demeanor was about to take a nose dive. "But, nothing is set in stone. I just. . .I thought we could just drive. Explore. Talk. Listen to some tunes. . ."

Arizona curiously regarded her wife and, finally conceding that it was finally time to start granting Callie the love, respect, and commitment she deserved, Arizona soon settled more comfortably into her seat. Then, pressing the power button for Callie's IPod that was nestled in the dock on the dashboard, she reclined her seat as the sound of a guitar filled the speakers.

_Red lights are flashing on the highway_

_I wonder if we're gonna ever get home_

_I wonder if we're gonna ever get home tonight_

_Everywhere the water's getting rough_

_Your best intentions may not be enough_

_I wonder if we're gonna ever get home tonight_

_But if you break down_

_I'll drive out and find you_

_If you forget my love_

_I'll try to remind you_

_And stay by you_

_When it don't come easy_

Sneaking a quick peek in Arizona's direction, Callie smiled as her wife mouthed some of the familiar words. Her eyes were closed, and Callie couldn't help but notice that she appeared more relaxed and, if possible, more beautiful than she had in months.

Callie knew this was only the beginning. They certainly had more to say - more insecurities to bear, more tears to cry, and most definitely more wounds to heal. But right now – in this moment – she was content to be present with her wife.

_I don't know nothing except change will come_

_Year after year what we do is undone_

_Time keeps moving from a crawl to a run_

_I wonder if we're gonna ever get home_

_You're out there walking down a highway_

_And all of the signs got blown away_

_Sometimes you wonder if you're walking in the wrong direction_

_But if you break down_

_I'll drive out and find you_

_If you forget my love_

_I'll try to remind you_

_And stay by you_

_When it don't come easy_

Happier than she had been in a very long time, and feeling more than a little vindicated at the fact that Arizona had decided to join her, Callie occasionally glanced toward her wife before returning her attention to the road, as she softly sang. . .

_So many things that I had before_

_That don't matter to me now_

_Tonight I cry for the love that I've lost_

_And the love I've never found_

_When the last bird falls_

_And the last siren sounds_

_Someone will say what's been said before_

_Some love we were looking for_

_When you break down_

_I'll drive out and find you_

_When you forget my love_

_I'll try to remind you_

_And stay by you_

_When it don't come easy_

_When it don't come easy_

* * *

**AN2: **Thank you so much for reading! Your comments, reviews, and questions are always welcome!


	3. Chapter 3

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thank you all so much for your interest in the reposting of this story. I am amazed by the amazing support and interest this story has received during its second time around.

* * *

_**Chapter Three**_

* * *

"You really don't have to stay up with me, Arizona," Callie softly stated after witnessing her wife nod off for the third time in about twenty minutes.

At one in the morning, the two women had been on the road for over three hours and, as Arizona unsuccessfully stifled yet another giant yawn, she then sluggishly stretched her arms overhead. "You sure?" she sleepily asked.

Callie gave her wife a tender smile as she simply nodded her head.

"Promise me you won't fall asleep at the wheel," Arizona insisted with a tired smile.

"I promise," Callie softly replied, her voice barely above a whisper as she was momentarily struck by the familiarity of her own response.

She had promised Arizona she'd never leave, and she hadn't. But, unfortunately, she had also promised her wife to not let them take her leg and, flinching slightly, Callie reflectively shook her head, desperately trying to rid her mind of the memories of Arizona's terrified pleas from not so long ago.

Arizona carefully studied Callie's flawless profile as the brunette concentrated on the highway in front of her and, reaching forward with a tentative hand, she then brushed a strand of brunette hair from her wife's cheek, gently twisting it behind her ear. Allowing her hand to linger for the briefest of moments as she simply stared at her gorgeous wife, Arizona then shook her head, internally chastising herself for her actions over the past few months.

She had pushed and pushed this woman - berated, accused, and blamed - but, yet, Callie was still there.

Callie still loved her.

And, Callie clearly still wanted to make their marriage work.

That fact was so very difficult for Arizona to even fathom and, as her exhausted cerulean eyes began to well with tears, she quickly cleared her throat in an attempt to gather herself before carefully standing from the passenger's seat of the state of the art RV.

"Okay," Arizona finally replied. And, taking a step toward the driver's seat, she then bent down, placing the gentlest of kisses against the side of her wife's head. "Goodnight, Callie," she softly said before retreating toward the back of the RV.

Callie sat motionless in her seat but, upon hearing the door to the bedroom click shut, a silly grin instantly broke out onto her face as she reveled in the warm fondness her wife had just shown.

But, as quickly as her smile appeared, it soon relaxed as she immediately forced herself to reign in the optimism that consumed her. She simply couldn't allow herself even a moment's reprieve from the steely disposition she'd erected for her own protection in the face of her wife's new - and highly capricious demeanor.

Arizona's actions were volatile, her mindset unwavering, and it often scared Callie how quickly the blonde's psyche could change from one moment to the next. This left Callie in a constant state of uncertainty, leading her to always proceed with caution and never get her hopes up when signs of the Arizona of old would unexpectedly emerged.

Ever since the crash, Arizona's actions and emotions had been nothing short of unstable, ranging - at times - from explosive anger and absolute denial to tormenting depression and implausible guilt.

And, who could really fault her? How would Arizona every possibly be able to come to terms with such a devastating loss? How could she possibly reconcile the fact that the person she trusted and loved most in the world had betrayed her?

All things considered, however, Callie was well aware that their situation had somehow improved. Arizona was no longer the uncompromising woman with bleak, lifeless eyes staring daggers into her soul. She was no longer the melancholy woman so debilitated by depression and despair that she could not physically remove herself from their bed - her words no longer dripping with accusation and condemnation.

It had taken time but, in Callie's opinion, it seemed that Arizona had eventually been able to partially come to terms with the fact that her leg ultimately _had_ to be amputated. It had to be amputated in order to save her life.

And, with Callie's continued support and tough love – though it was incessantly unwelcomed – the rational thoughts of the doctor inside Arizona had reluctantly been able to outweigh the unreasonable judgments made at the scathing loss of her limb. Through this, she had reconciled with the fact that, while Callie was ultimately responsible for the amputation, she simply was _not_ to blame.

Upon the acceptance of this revelation, there had been a clear shift in her behavior, as well as, in their relationship. While still resentful, Arizona had slowly begun to heal. She had forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. She had coerced her body up and out of bed, eventually forcing herself to communicate with Callie about the best prosthesis available before compelling herself to take the advice of her physical therapist to productively participate in rehabilitation.

Callie smiled at her own silent reverie, tears springing to her eyes as she fondly remembered the first time she had seen Arizona up and walking between the parallel bars in the physical therapy gym.

That had certainly been a miraculously awe-inspiring sight.

And, three weeks later, at the hesitance of her wife and colleagues, Arizona had insisted upon returning to work with the assistance of a cane.

Two weeks after that, she had personally placed her name back on the surgical schedule.

But, Callie knew her wife too well. Even though Arizona seemed to have progressed by leaps and bounds, Callie could tell the other woman was still struggling both physically and emotionally, which led them to their very position.

Drumming her thumbs against the steering wheel, Callie pondered her reasoning behind this impromptu road trip. And, what this all boiled down to was. . .

Arizona still wasn't the same. She wasn't healed.

Callie in no way expected her to ever fully return to the exact same person she had been before the crash, but she knew in her heart that Arizona still had a lot of healing and reckoning to do before she could ever truly move on, not only personally, but professionally, as well.

At work, her surgeries took longer than necessary, her bedside manner faltered and, occasionally, her once steady hands shook with fear and uncertainty that had never before been present.

At home – even though they had together found some peace – their every interaction remained strained. Their conversations were uncomfortable; they barely touched, rarely kissed, and absolutely never made love. They had begun to sleep in the same bed again just weeks before, but the mere act of sleeping in the same bed together continued to be awkward, almost always making for less than restful nights.

While Callie longed to re-establish the flirty companionship they once shared, she was also exceedingly aware of the fact that she simply couldn't be greedy. She couldn't wish for too much because, ultimately, she was _lucky_. Lucky Arizona was still alive. Lucky she had not lost Arizona altogether.

It was exceedingly difficult to admit but, deep down, Callie realized her wife may never again be the same cheerfully spirited woman with the super magic smile. She may never again be the woman who kissed her in hospital stairwells or dirty bar bathrooms - she may never again be the woman who danced with her in the middle of their living room floor.

But, despite all that, Callie still held out hope. She remained wholly committed to helping Arizona get back to that place. Their future together depended on it.

So, here they were aboard a 48-foot-long, nearly half million dollar recreation vehicle complete with two bedrooms, two baths, stainless steel appliances, posh leather seating, two fireplaces, and three flat screen TVs.

When Callie had initially pondered getting away from Seattle for a while with Arizona and Sofia, her mind had immediately ventured toward tropical paradises and private white sand beaches. That notion had been quickly squashed, however, when she realized the flaw in her plan. In order to go away to a place such as Fiji or Spain, Hawaii or the Caribbean, they would have to travel by plane and, at this point in the journey of Arizona's healing, they simply just weren't there. There was just no way in hell they would be getting on a plane.

So, she thought they could just drive, but a trip anywhere by car or bus would be too uncomfortable for Arizona, too confining for Sofia. And, she had almost dismissed all thoughts of an extended vacation with her family when Derek Shepherd had suggested the use of an RV.

Briefly looking around the vast cabin of the vehicle before returning her eyes to the road, Callie softly chuckled. Seriously – Callie Torres – behind the wheel of a massive RV – a far cry from her beloved Thunderbird. She never could have predicted this turn of events even in her wildest dreams.

Glancing toward the clock on the dashboard, Callie soon realized she had been lost in her own thoughts for close to an hour, the vehicle eerily quiet beyond the rumble of the motor and the rotation of the wheels and, settling more comfortably into her seat, she looked toward the screen of the GPS, noticing she still had six more hours of driving before they reached their first destination.

Deciding she had enough energy to push through, she powered on her IPod, getting lost in the music and the monotony of the passing road signs and glowing lines on the road.

* * *

Hours later, Arizona awoke with a start. Momentarily shaken, she scanned her surroundings as her sleepy mind began to clear, realization finally setting in. Looking up at the ceiling in the _master bedroom_ of the RV, she smiled slightly, tiredly remembering the events of the previous night.

Callie had looked so happy and excited as she proudly came bounding down the steps of the gleaming black monstrosity of a vehicle and, closing her eyes, Arizona tried to take a snapshot of Callie's smile in her head.

She missed that beaming megawatt grin. She missed a lot of things.

Rolling onto her left side, Arizona sighed.

Why was she still fighting and distancing herself from her wife? Callie had been there to support her – day in and day out – from the moment they had been rescued from the side of the mountain. She had tried to protect her but yet, Callie – her guardian and the best thing in her life – had also let her down. She had betrayed her in the very worst of ways.

Even though she had begun to forgive and was slowly coming to terms with the entire horrific situation, it was - at times - completely impossible to forget that Callie was ultimately responsible for the amputation of her leg.

The rational part of her mind realized that had their positions been reversed - had Callie been the one lying in that hospital bed, had Callie been the one fighting for her life, she would have made the exact same decision. If the unspeakable options presented to her were the choice of living with Callie without a limb versus living without Callie at all, she certainly would have come to the same harrowing conclusion.

And yet, in the beginning, she was infinitely unable to metabolize her wife's choice. Callie had chosen to save her life at a time when her own desperate mind couldn't fathom living without such an integral part of her body.

Consequently, Arizona had then chosen to lay in bed for months, obstinately unable to comprehend and accept Callie's unimaginable decision. She had alienated Callie and Sofia when they needed her most – when Sofia had lost a parent and Callie had lost her best friend.

With a shake of her head, Arizona sighed, remembering Callie's strangled pleas and infuriated demands to get up, get out of bed, and snap out of it. But, completely lost in an endless sea of absolute denial, oppressive self-degradation, and tormenting depression, she had barely been able to process breathing, let alone anything else.

And, on top of all these profound deeply-seated emotions, she was also just flat out pissed off.

At herself.

At Alex.

At Callie.

Hell, she was even pissed off at Mark.

At that point in time, Arizona was simply pissed off at the entire world.

Shaken from her thoughts by a sudden sense of discomfort in her left _knee_, Arizona rolled onto her back in an attempt to rid her left leg of its awkward positioning but, suddenly halting, she tightly squeezed her eyes closed, adamantly trying to force her brain to come to terms with what the rest of her was slowly beginning to accept.

There was no sense of discomfort in her left knee.

There was no awkward positioning of her left leg.

Because, there was no left knee.

Throwing back the comforter, Arizona quickly swung her right leg over the side of the bed, abruptly forcing her body into a sitting position and, grasping the base of her residual limb, she began to coarsely massage around the now disappearing scar.

"Damn it," she muttered to herself, once again squeezing her eyes shut.

As she continued the vigorous ministrations over her angry limb, she flashed back to a night just three months prior when she had been abruptly ripped from sleep. Screaming in agony, her face had been covered in sweat and tears as the most intense pain she had ever experienced burned like a raging inferno from the tip of her left big toe all the way up to her left knee.

A left big toe and a left knee that her confused and horrified mind suddenly realized no longer existed.

Opening her eyes as the sensation began to desist, Arizona recalled the events of that night not so long ago. To this day, she could still see the fear, yet steadfast protection in Callie's eyes as she came charging through the closed door of the bedroom they used to share from what Arizona assumed was her position on the couch in the living room.

"_Don't touch me," Arizona demanded when Callie pulled back the covers, settling herself onto the edge of the bed in front of her and reaching forward to touch her residual limb. _

"_Arizona. . ."_

"_I said don't fucking touch me, Callie," Arizona screamed, slapping Callie's hands away, the distress still present in the blonde's rigid movements and petrified face. _

_Not deterred, Callie determinedly fought through her wife's flailing arms and, reaching forward, her strong hands suddenly came in contact with the battered limb. _

_Without speaking, Callie began to apply pressure to and massage the amputated area, desperately trying to relieve her wife's tense muscles - to hopefully lessen the horror of such profound and bewildering torture Arizona was experiencing. _

_Studying Arizona's face, Callie watched as her body slowly began to relax. "You can't keep doing this, Arizona. . ."_

Taking a deep breath as the pain disappeared as quickly as it presented itself, Arizona stopped her own motions at her leg.

That night, there had been a clear shift in her behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, Arizona knew that was the point when she had slowly begun to heal. She had forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. She had coerced her body up and out of bed, eventually forcing herself to communicate with Callie about the best prosthesis available before compelling herself to take the advice of her physical therapist to productively participate in rehabilitation.

Reaching toward the nightstand, Arizona grabbed the cotton sleeve she had discarded there after removing her prosthesis the night before and, after applying the sleeve and assuring her prosthesis was adequately in place, she lowered the leg of her pajama pants over it. Donning an UGG boot on both feet, she then slowly stood from the bed.

Because, gone were the days of quickly jumping up out of bed and rushing toward the front door to gather the newspaper in her bare feet as Callie poured their morning cups of coffee - there was little spontaneity left to what were once thought of as mundane everyday occurrences. Her every move now had to be carefully deliberated and thoughtfully choreographed.

With a sigh at the thought, Arizona made her way across the bedroom and, reaching for the door knob, she suddenly realized that the RV was no longer moving. Glancing over her shoulder toward a clock hanging on the wall, she noted the time.

9:00am already?

Exiting the room, Arizona decided to make her way toward the bedroom where Sofia had been sleeping the night before and, leaning in the door frame, she glanced toward the crib, a dimpled grin gracing her face.

Sofia was already awake and contentedly playing with her favorite baby doll. "Baby sleep," the little girl cooed in a lovingly sweet toddler voice as she not so gently stroked the dolls face.

"Hey, big girl," Arizona murmured as she reached into the bed to gather her daughter into her arms. "Is your baby sleeping?"

Brushing errant strands of dark hair from the little girl's face, Arizona pressed a gentle kiss against the skin of her tanned forehead.

Arizona had certainly built up a mountain of regrets over the past few months – had behaved shamefully – but, at the time, was wholly unable to control the volatile emotions that seemed to morph and change without warning inside her accusatory mind and overwhelmed body. Above every spiteful thing she had done and every curse she had spewed toward her wife, friends, and therapists, it was Sofia – the disaffection she had shown the little girl in the aftermath of the crash – that was her biggest regret.

Somehow, though, Sofia hadn't judged and still loved her mamma completely and without accusation. And, above all else, Arizona had promised herself - and Sofia - that she would never allow anything to come between them ever again. Because, she loved that little girl more than life itself - Sofia was the dream she didn't know she had - and, Arizona planned to spend the rest of her life making sure she knew just that.

Setting the little girl down onto now remarkably steady year and a half old feet, Arizona happily followed the toddler into the main cabin of the vehicle and, first looked toward the front where she and Callie had spent the first few hours of their trip, she then scanned the rest of the cabin when she found her wife nowhere in sight.

To her left, though, Arizona soon spotted a familiar mass of unruly dark hair emerging from beneath several blankets that were haphazardly thrown over a long body that lay uncomfortably sprawled out on one of the leather couches of the RV.

Ruefully shaking her head at the sight, a loving smile formed on Arizona's face.

Callie's sleeping habits. A lot of things had changed and would continue to change in their lives – but, clearly, _that_ was not one of them.

"Mommy sleep," Sofia squealed too loudly as she quickly toddled toward her mother's sleeping form.

"Sofia. . .no," Arizona gently scolded as she carefully attempted to catch the little girl before she reached the sleeping brunette.

But, before Arizona could reach her, Sofia's chubby hands made contact with her mother's face, continuously patting it - not so gently. "Mommy sleep, mommy sleep, mommy sleep. . ." Sofia happily chanted at the welcome sight of her Mami.

"Well, I was," the Latina growled without moving her head from where her cheek rested flat against the pillow, her hair covering most of her face. "Morning, baby," she then grumbled, reaching a hand from beneath the warm cocoon of the blankets to pull the happy little girl toward her.

Stepping forward, Arizona lifted the child from the floor. "I'm sorry, I couldn't catch her in time," she genuinely apologized and, brushing the strands of chaotic dark hair from her wife's face, Arizona stared down into the one brown eye that quickly opened upon feeling her tentative touch.

"How long have you been asleep?" Arizona asked as she continued to gently stroke Callie's cheek and hair.

Curiously watching her wife, Callie's eye once again fell shut before both eyes opened to meet Arizona's gorgeous blue eyed gaze. "Only about an hour," came her tired reply.

"You drove all night!?" Arizona incredulously exclaimed.

Receiving a slight nod, Arizona's face softened into what Callie thought was appreciation?

Gratitude?

She wasn't quite sure and, as she started to extract herself from the warmth of her cozy entrapment, she was quickly met with a more firm press of Arizona's hand against her shoulder.

"Stay there," Arizona softly insisted. "Go back to sleep. I've got Sofia."

Callie paused in her movement, her eyes agog. Arizona had rarely offered to care for their daughter by herself in the past five months, not because she didn't want to, the brunette had surmised, but because she felt too insecure and unconfident to do so.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm good," Arizona confidently replied.

Giving her wife a slight nod, Callie then hastily settled back into the warmth of the blankets and pillows. "Look out the door," she barely slurred, her body quickly returning to its slumber. "It's beautiful out there."

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks again for taking the time to read this story. Reviews, comments, and questions are always welcome!


	4. Chapter 4

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **The response to this repost has been absolutely amazing! Thank you for all of the interest and for taking the time to leave reviews, even though, for some, this story isn't new. For those of you who are reading it for the first time, I sincerely hope it doesn't disappoint!

* * *

_**Chapter Four**_

* * *

"Grizzly Bears, Callie!" Arizona excitedly exclaimed from her position in the driver's seat of the RV. "Not just one, but _three_. I mean, _seriously_? Grizzly Bears? Right there – like twenty feet in front of us. Can you even believe it?"

Callie optimistically chuckled at her wife's enthusiastic ramblings.

After spending three days enjoying the pristine forests, alpine meadows, rugged mountains, and spectacular lakes of Glacier National Park in West Glacier, Montana, the RV was now re-stocked, refueled, and ready for the next phase of their journey. And, with Sofia settled into her crib for an afternoon nap, Callie sat comfortably in the passenger's seat contentedly studying a road map as Arizona effortlessly navigated the giant RV along the highway.

"It was pretty great," Callie agreed with a smile and a nod of her head.

"Are you kidding?" Arizona teasingly scoffed. "It was _awesome_."

_Awesome_.

Callie momentarily flinched at the word, unable to recall the last time she had heard Arizona use it.

"You're right, Arizona. It was _awesome_," Callie admitted with a chuckle as she lowered the map onto her lap to study her wife's profile.

It wasn't until right then - upon hearing that word slip from her wife's beautiful mouth and seeing her genuinely happy for the first time in what seemed like forever - that Callie realized just how much she had missed the frivolity of the blonde's beloved vocabulary and the magic of her smile.

"I'm really glad you liked it," Callie stated, unable to tear her eyes away from her now beaming wife.

"I seriously hate camping, But I could totally get used to this," Arizona happily continued, careless of her onlooker. "The lakes were just as blue as the sky. Oh, and the glaciers. . ."

Arizona suddenly trailed off, the bright, dimpled smile promptly disappearing from her face.

Instantly aware of her wife's sudden unease and change in demeanor, Callie's smile faded, as well. "Arizona?"

The body of her wife that had been peacefully relaxed just moments before, now sat rigidly in the seat, Arizona's posture fully erect, face frozen in terror, eyes fixed more to the side of the road than where they needed to be.

Following Arizona's immoveable gaze to whatever she seemed so transfixed by, Callie briefly caught sight of the green and white highway sign, seconds before they motored on past.

_Idaho Falls – 114 Miles_

_Twin Falls – 242 Miles_

_Boise – 324 Miles_

Shit.

Anxiously gazing toward the road ahead, Callie gathered herself enough to slowly stand, fearing any rapid movement might possibly startle her already frightened wife. And, taking a tentative step toward the blonde, Callie gently nervously cleared her throat.

"Arizona. . ."

Upon hearing her name, Arizona's wide blue eyes darted from the side of the road back toward the highway in front of her. "I-I. . ." she stuttered through heavy breaths, her right hand forcefully gripping the steering wheel, knuckles white. Her left hand now violently pulled at her shirt in an attempt to relieve herself of its constricting oppression.

Noting a further increase in her wife's respirations, Callie again looked toward the road. "Arizona," she again softly stated, her voice somehow remaining steady. "Sweetie, I need you to calm down and pull over to the side of the road."

Arizona's eyes rapidly blinked rapidly before squeezing tightly shut.

"No, no. . .keep your eyes open. Keep your eyes on the road," Callie quickly requested, trying to keep her voice calm, though her fear was swiftly escalating. "Our daughter is in here with us, Arizona. And we need to keep her safe."

Arizona's eyes went wide, her chin suddenly trembling. "Sofia," she seemed to suddenly recollect, sweat beading on her brow. "I-I. . .I can't move," she timidly admitted, her entire being paralyzed by wave upon wave of immeasurable panic and anxiety.

Reaching forward, Callie rested a trembling hand on Arizona's equally quaking shoulder. "I'm here, okay?" she desperately tried to sooth.

Continuing to blankly stare at the road, Arizona's nod of affirmation was nearly imperceptible.

"Okay, good," Callie encouraged. "Now, I need you to pull over to the side of the road."

Arizona didn't speak, her panicked mind completely unable to process her wife's words.

"Listen to me, Arizona," Callie persisted, gently squeezing her shoulder. "I'm right here with you and we - we're going to do this together. I'm going to slide into the seat behind you," she haltingly suggested. "All you have to do is let go of the steering wheel and take your foot off the gas. We can do this. Okay?"

"O-o-okay," the blonde breathlessly agreed, frantically nodding her head up and down.

"Lean forward for me," Callie deliberately instructed as she lifted her left leg over the captain's chair, situating herself so that Arizona now sat between her legs. "I'm here, Arizona. I'm right here with you. You're doing great."

Arizona could only nod, impenetrable fear still etching her every feature.

Hesitantly resting her chin on the blonde's shoulder, Callie softly spoke against an ivory ear. "I've got you, Arizona. It's okay." Reaching her left hand forward, Callie then took hold of the steering wheel. "You can let go now. I'm here."

After a moment's hesitation, Arizona slowly did as she was told, releasing the wheel, her hand then balling into a tight fist.

Wrapping her right arm around her wife's waist, Callie held her tightly and, sensing Arizona relax almost immediately at the deep pressure of her touch, she gently continued her benevolent yet, insistent, instructions. "Now, take your foot off the gas, and I'll help you out of the seat. Okay?"

Arizona's head nodded wildly. "Okay," she anxiously replied.

In one swift movement, Callie lifted Arizona's body, forcing her up and over her own leg and, when Arizona awkwardly scrambled to her feet, Callie was then able to settle her own foot onto the brake pedal. Slowing the behemoth vehicle, Callie immediately navigated it toward the side of the highway before bringing it to a halt.

Tightly grasping the steering wheel, Callie let out a deep breath, trying to calm her more than frazzled nerves and, once she felt somewhat calm, she slowly glanced over her shoulder to where her wife stood visibly shaken. "Arizona. . ."

"Take me home, Callie!" came the blonde's vehement demand. "I don't want to be here!"

Standing from her seat, Callie carefully approached her wife. "Arizona. . ."

"No! Don't!" Arizona yelled, swiftly turning around and stalking toward the bedroom. Reaching the door, she nearly lost her balance as she spun around, her eyes welling with terrified and angry tears. "I'm going to lie down. And, when I come out, we better not be in fucking Idaho!"

Jumping as she heard the door slam shut, Callie closed her eyes, shaking her head as she plopped herself back down into her seat. "Damn it," she growled, her hands fiercely shaking as her own eyes brimmed with moisture.

Two steps forward. Three steps back.

"Unbelievable," Callie then muttered as she leaned forward, resting her forehead against the steering wheel.

Arizona had been prone to anxiety attacks since the crash and, in that moment, Callie mentally berated herself for not anticipating such a reaction. But, how could she have known? How could she have ever guessed that something as simple as a road sign could send Arizona spirally into a dauntless abyss of terrorized panic?

They'd had such a wonderful few days. . .

Shaking her head at the thought, Callie harshly punched some coordinates into the GPS, pondering her next move.

Maybe she should just wave the white flag and abort her mission.

Maybe she should take Arizona back to Seattle as the blonde had demanded.

Maybe she should just lie down and die – because, she couldn't keep doing this alone.

Grabbing the map she had hastily thrown to the floor, Callie glared at it cruelly. She had no idea where they would end up next, but it certainly wasn't going to be anywhere near fucking Idaho.

* * *

Tearing off her jacket, Arizona brusquely threw it onto a chair in the corner of the bedroom before sitting on the side of the bed and, tossing her head back on her shoulders, she let out a harsh sigh. Then, glancing across the room to gaze at herself in the mirror above the chest of drawers, she painfully searched the face staring back at her, scrutinizing its every feature.

Once sparkling, bright blue eyes now appeared dim and expressionless. Dark circles had taken up residence under those emotionless eyes as slight wrinkles gathered at their corners. Once bouncy, blonde curls now hung limply around her sullen face and, the dimpled grin that had once been a mainstay of her image, now rarely ever curled at her lips.

Sighing, Arizona ruefully shook her head.

They had been having such a wonderful time. Over the past few days - while unease and discomfort still persisted - she had begun to feel more normal – more like the real Arizona Robbins.

She had felt more confident, more ambition, and happier than she had in months. She had taken a more active role in caring for Sofia and had even caught herself - on occasion - flirting with her wife.

Even while lost in the clutches of a full-fledged anxiety attack, it had somehow felt so good – so _right_ – to have Callie seated so closely behind her, her wife's front intimately pressing into her back, a strong, tanned arm wrapped tightly around her middle.

But, then she had panicked even further. Because, how could she possibly be feeling those things toward her gorgeous wife when she still felt like a mere fraction of the woman she'd once been. A woman she hardly recognized. A confusing version of her former self who merely existed simply because her heart continued to beat.

Stupid road sign.

_Boise – 324 Miles_

Two steps forward. Three steps back.

Forcing her eyes from the mirror, Arizona fully burrowed herself onto the bed and, wrapping herself in the plush down comforter, she rolled onto her side, her back facing the door.

This wasn't her. She wasn't supposed to be this terrified woman who had begged her wife not to give up on her, and she certainly wasn't meant to be the woman baring her heart and soul to Alex Karev.

Feeling the RV come to a stop, Arizona was momentarily forced from her self-deprecating thoughts and, briefly wondering where they were and why they weren't hauling ass out of this godforsaken state, she intently listened, soon hearing footsteps and then the soft voice of her wife through the adjacent bedroom wall.

"Hi, sweet girl," Callie gently cooed. "Did you have a nice nap?"

"Me eat. . ." came the little girl's response.

Arizona heard no more words, but could hear lively music playing from Sofia's beloved _Leap Frog Learn and Groove Musical Table _as Callie moved about the cabin of the vehicle.

Lost in her own tormented thoughts, Arizona soon began to doze.

* * *

Quietly entering the bedroom, Callie gazed upon her wife lying with the blankets tightly cocooned around her body and, not wanting to push, but also not willing to allow Arizona to take any unnecessary steps backward, Callie thoughtfully chose her words. "You okay?" she gently began, noting that her wife was not asleep by the cadence of her breath. "Would you like to talk about it?"

When Arizona didn't respond, Callie decided to continue. "I don't want you hiding out in here, Arizona. You need to try to talk to me, sweetheart."

Still met with silence, Callie pushed through, trying again – her final attempt for the evening. "I totally get what just happened out there, Arizona. I understand, and I can empathize," she genuinely stated, sitting at the foot of the bed with her back facing her wife. "So, umm. . .I'm going to let you stay in here a little while longer. But, I won't let you go back into hiding, Arizona. I just can't do it. I won't be able to survive it. Not again," she honestly admitted as she slowly stood from her seat. "So, take some time. Do what you need to do, but Arizona. . .I won't let you disappear from us. Not again. So, I'm going to let you do what you need, but then - well, then I want you to get up, get out of bed, and come have dinner with your family."

With that, Callie turned and, exiting the room, she gently pulled the door closed behind her.

Instinctively, Arizona wanted to ignore her wife. She wanted to crawl back into the tormented abyss she was so close to entering just moments before Callie's interruption but, from some far reaching unknown place, a new resolve suddenly began to fill her being.

She really did need to get up.

She needed to figure out how to survive this.

She needed to find a way to return to the woman she had once been.

Callie was doing everything she could – everyone was being so supportive – but, now, it was up to her. She needed to figure out how to get right with herself. How to somehow make this unfathomable hurt she was feeling go away.

And, hesitantly standing from the bed, Arizona slowly stepped toward the door. Resting her hand on the knob, she took a deep breath, steeling herself for what lay beyond this closed door.

* * *

Hearing movement behind her from where she stood at the stove, Callie was more than a little surprised to see Arizona appear from behind the barrier of the closed bedroom door and, silently watching as the blonde lifted their daughter from playing on the floor in order to resettle the chattering toddler into her high chair, Callie's heart swelled with pride and admiration when Arizona cheerfully engage with their daughter.

Covertly turning back to her work at the stove, Callie couldn't help the smile that consumed her face at the presence of the new determination that now seemed to emanate from her wife's entire being.

"Okay. . ."

Callie barely heard the tentative voice and, placing the wooden spoon she held in her hand onto the spoon rest, she slowly turned toward her wife and child, leaning back against the countertop.

"Sometimes I'm going to freak out. And, _sometimes_, I might take three steps backward," Arizona earnestly began, her eyes moving from the blocks she was stacking with Sofia to meet her wife's supportive gaze. "And, that sucks because, I'm not going to be able to tell when it's going to happen or-or-or for how long it will last."

Arizona paused, closing her eyes in an attempt to gather herself before she could continue. "But, what I am sure of is that. . .I lost my leg. My _leg, _Callie! And, that is something that's going to take time to heal from. _But_, I want to try. More than anything, I want you, and I want to try. . ."

Callie stood still as a statue, infinitely thankful for the countertop to lean against for fear she may collapse without its support.

"And, I want - if you're willing - I want your help. But, I also need you to understand that sometimes I'm going to be angry a-and sad. And, I need you to allow me that, Callie. At least for a little while."

Trying to mask the surprise she knew was clearly evident on her face, Callie simply nodded her head.

This was undoubtedly the most Arizona had ever said to her about the plane crash – about her own emotions and, gazing into the glistening eyes of her wife, Callie valiantly fought back her own tears.

Because, her amazing wife, the woman who had once brought so much joy to her heart but, lately, so much sorrow, was starting to open up to her.

"Can you understand that? For me, Callie? Can you do that for _me_?" Arizona asked, swiping at the lone tear that trailed down her cheek.

Callie wanted to rush toward her wife – to hug her tightly and never let go – to kiss away her tears but, she staunchly remained in her place, not wanting to damage this moment for anything in the world.

"Yeah, Arizona," Callie cautiously replied. "I can totally do that."

* * *

"_When it gets dark,_

_The birds and the flowers_

_Shut their eyes and say good night,_

_And God, who loves them,_

_Counts the hours_

_And keeps them safe till it gets light._

_Dear Father, count the hours tonight,_

_While I'm asleep and cannot see;_

_And in the morning, may the light_

_Shine for the birds, the flowers, and me."_

From her position in the driver's seat of the RV, Callie smiled as she heard Arizona quietly trail off through the baby monitor from where she knew she sat rocking Sofia to sleep in the smaller of the two bedrooms.

Sitting in silence, Callie continued to listen, completely unable to stop herself.

"Goodnight big girl," Arizona softly whispered. "Mamma loves you."

Callie fully expected to then hear the door to the master bedroom close once Arizona had Sofia settled in her crib but, briefly glancing over her shoulder, she was surprised to see her wife walking in her direction.

Coming to stand to Callie's right, Arizona briefly paused before gently sitting in the passenger's seat. "So, Karev just sent me a text," she idly offered, her eyes trained on the screen of her phone. "He wanted to make sure we hadn't killed each other."

Glancing to her right, Callie appeared worried. "What did you say?" she nervously asked.

Arizona smiled despite her wife's apparent trepidation and, knowingly holding her Callie's gaze, she spoke directly from her heart. "I told him it was touch and go there for a while, but I'm pretty sure we're going to be okay."

* * *

"Arizona," Callie gently urged several hours later, trying to wake her wife, but not wanting to startle her. "Sweetie, wake up."

Arizona struggled to open her tired eyes. "Mmmm, no. I'm sleeping," came her stubborn response, her weary eyes quickly closing once again.

Callie chuckled at her wife's antics as she knelt down beside the sleepy blonde where she still sat in the passenger's seat of the RV. Tentatively reaching out to push locks of blonde hair from an alabaster face, Callie gently stroked her satiny smooth skin of her cheek. "Come on, honey. It's two in the morning. Let's get you to bed."

Arizona's eyes slowly opened and, sitting more erect from her reclined position, she anxiously looked around her

"Where. . .where are we?" she tentatively asked.

Dropping the hand that was stroking her wife's cheek to rest on her right thigh, Callie squeezed it briefly in a display of understanding. "Utah. Near Salt Lake City," she honestly replied.

Seeing the relief flash across her wife's exhausted features, Callie stood from her kneeling position before reaching a hand in Arizona's direction. "Come on. It's late. Sofia will be up before we know it."

Arizona thankfully took Callie's hand, allowing her wife to pull her into standing.

Gently guiding the still half asleep blonde through the cabin of the vehicle, Callie stopped in the doorway of the master bedroom, nervously wringing her hands in front of her as Arizona continued on into the room.

"Goodnight, Arizona," Callie quietly stated before turning to make her bed on the couch she had been occupying since the beginning of their trip.

"Callie. . ."

"Hmm?" Callie quickly spun around to face her wife.

Arizona paused, blowing out an exaggerated breath and, stepping forward, she nervously ran her hand through her own hair, aimlessly pushing her hair back from her face.

"I-I'd really like it if you joined me. . ."

* * *

Callie blinked several times, fighting to remain in the comfortable abyss she was slowly being pulled from, morning sunlight seeping through the closed blinds of the RV window.

But, feeling a surprising yet, familiar, warmth against her, she let out a contented sigh and, carefully turning onto her back, she then grasped the hand that was haphazardly flung over her waist. Lacing her own tanned fingers through pale ones, Callie lay there for several minutes, content to bask in the warmth provided by the plush down comforter and the body curled up next to her.

Of course she had joined Arizona the night before. . .or earlier that morning. Though hesitant, the fact remained that she longed to feel the familiar comfort they used to share and definitely did not want her wife to experience the undeniable insecurities that certainly would have surfaced had she rejected her request.

Callie desperately longed for Arizona to become comfortable with her again but, more importantly, she needed Arizona to become comfortable with herself.

But, what if Arizona changed her mind?

What if - when she woke up - she realized she didn't actually want Callie to be there with her in their bed?

Not wanting to push too hard, Callie decidedly kissed the top of Arizona's head before extracting herself from the bed and, threading her arms through a black zip up hoodie and pulling it over the tank top and pajama pants she wore, she then exited the bedroom, gently pulling the door behind her.

Briefly glancing in on Sofia, she noted that the toddler was still sleeping soundly and, after placing the blanket she had kicked off at some point in the middle of the night back over her sleeping form, Callie then moved about the cabin of the vehicle starting a pot of coffee and pondering their day.

Today, there would be no more talk of Idaho or of plane crashes. No more talk of amputations or of freaking out.

Not today.

Today was a day to just be themselves. Just Callie Torres and Arizona Robbins spending the day with their beautiful daughter, doing anything and everything their hearts desired.

Everything else would be there tomorrow – or the next day – or the day after that. Sadly, Callie realized, _everything else_ would be a constant presence for the rest of their lives. It would get better – it had to – but it would undoubtedly always be present, leaving a lasting impact.

Settling onto the couch, cup of coffee in one hand and her IPhone in the other, Callie rested her legs along the length of the couch and, scanning through some emails and missed texts, she smiled.

_So excited to see you guys. When do you think you'll be here?_"

Shooting off a quick text in response, Callie hurriedly closed the text screen when she heard the bedroom door swing open. "Morning," she cheerfully greeted, cautiously eyeing a less than cheerful looking blonde. Fearing the worst, she then asked, "You okay?"

"Mmmm, tired," Arizona immediately grumbled, throwing herself onto the other side of the couch and immediately leaning her head against Callie's shoulder.

Relieved, but shocked by the familiar closeness she so desperately longed for, Callie's body momentarily went taut, but she quickly forced herself to relax. "Want some coffee?" she asked, rolling her eyes at herself when her voiced wavered.

"Yes. Definitely need some coffee."

Smiling as she quickly stood, Callie moved to pour a steaming cup for her wife. Handing it to Arizona, she then returned to sit next to her on the couch.

Allowing Arizona a moment to enjoy a few sips, Callie then said, "I thought we could just have a girls' day, today. You. Me. Sofia. Whatever you want to do."

Taking a few more swallows of the heated liquid, Arizona pondered her options. Smiling cheerfully, she then asked, "Can we go to the park?"

* * *

"Mamma! Mamma!" Sofia happily squealed as she slid down the sliding board and into Arizona's awaiting arms.

"Hey! There's my girl!" Arizona excitedly cheered, pulling the toddler from the bottom of the slide.

"More. . ." Sofia cheerfully yelled, quickly moving from Arizona's arms to run back to where Callie stood at the base of the ladder. "More, Mommy!"

"One more time, Sof," Callie agreed, helping short legs up the steps.

"Mamma! Mamma!" the little girl squealed, again sliding down to where Arizona stood at the base of the slide.

Pulling Sofia into her arms, Arizona approached her wife who was situating herself onto the wooden ledge surrounding a giant sandbox. Setting Sofia gently onto her feet atop the sand, Arizona then lowered herself to sit next to her wife.

Watching Sofia plop down onto her bottom, the two women sat in comfortable silence, both content to watch their daughter shovel sand into a bright pink bucket.

"I never thought I'd get to do this again," Arizona softly admitted after some time.

Turning toward her, Callie gazed at the side of Arizona's face as the blonde continued to watch Sofia. "I know. . ."

Facing her wife, Arizona's eyes glistened with unshed tears. "That was a bad day."

Callie grimly nodded, remembering the day Arizona had cried in her arms after frantically pleading with her to do something – to not give up on her – to not let them take her leg.

"Yeah. Yeah, it was," Callie sympathetically agreed, her own eyes now filling with tears. "But, today. . .today is a _good_ day," she tried to recover, not willing to shatter the fun loving, easy-going mood that had surrounded them for the entire day.

Arizona smiled through her tears. "Yes, it is. It really, _really _is," she shakily agreed, her previously carefree demeanor beginning to re-emerge.

"I love you," Arizona then whispered, gently placing both hands at the sides of Callie's neck to tenderly rub her thumbs over flawless, caramel cheeks as she gradually pulled the other woman in her direction.

With the steadfast gaze of beautiful azure eyes briefly flicking from magical, but questioning brown, Arizona then leaned forward as her gaze landed on plump lips, sheepishly smiling before her eyes returned to stare into the very depths of Callie's soul.

Allowing her own eyes to then wonder to perfect pink lips, Callie was momentarily surprised when that luscious mouth tentatively pressed against her own and, shyly smiling when Arizona pulled away, Callie once again lost herself in her wife's astonishingly blue orbs.

"I love you, too."

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks again for taking the time to read and review!


	5. Chapter 5

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Five**_

* * *

"Ever been to Arizona, Arizona?" Callie happily joked, softly chuckling at her own absurd attempt at humor as she emerged from the RV, baby monitor in hand, having just finished settling Sofia for an afternoon nap.

Seemingly unaware of her wife's jovial mood, Arizona continued to stare out over the majestic landscape of the Grand Canyon, her lips forming a tight line and her forehead scrunching in deeply-seated consideration. And, after several long moments of silence, she softly spoke. "Can you talk through this with me?"

Taking a seat on the bench across from her wife at a picnic table in Grand Canyon National Park, Callie searched the blonde's face for further explanation.

"I need to know everything."

Callie shook her head, realization setting in. "Arizona. . ."

"Just start from the beginning. I want to hear it all," the blonde firmly insisted. "I think best out loud."

Closing her eyes and heaving an exaggerated sigh, Callie looked across the table at her wife, not yet ready to give in.

"Actually, you don't," Callie contended, trying to keep her tone light. "At least not where your own feelings are concerned," she carefully continued. "You know as well as I do that you completely internalize things. You let them build up and eat away at you until you explode. The only time you're actually willing to talk through something is when it involves one of your patients."

Arizona incredulously stared at her wife, momentarily surprised by the sheer accuracy of her statement. "Well, I _was_ a patient - _the_ patient. So, let's talk."

Callie took a deep breath, looking nervously toward the sky. Arizona had read through her own patient chart - time and time again – but, if this was what she needed – if hearing the entire harrowing story from her own mouth would somehow help Arizona heal, Callie would force herself to oblige.

So, swallowing hard and then clearing her throat, Callie carefully considered her words, desperately trying to align her thoughts into a specific chronological order. "Umm, well, what's the last thing you remember?"

Searching her own mind for that specific memory, Arizona's eyes stared out over one of nature's most spectacular offerings. "Derek's surgery. You had to go because his surgery was about to begin."

Nodding her head, Callie reluctantly decided to continue. "So, about two hours into the surgery. . ." she trailed off, her nervous brown eyes immediately welling with tears. "Come on, Arizona. I really don't want to do this."

Reaching across the table to reassuringly take one of Callie's hands between her own, Arizona gave her a tight smile, blue eyes now focused on her wife's face. "You said you'd help me, Callie. You've been trying for months to get me to talk and, now, I'm ready. I'm ready for you to tell me everything."

Looking directly into her wife's eyes, Callie briefly hesitated before warily beginning again. "I had just looked up to Meredith - in the gallery. I wanted her to know that things were going okay," she weakly offered, her eyes clouding with retrospection. "I, umm. . .I was holding the nerve graft in my hand and was just beginning to place the harvested nerve between the two severed ends. . ."

Arizona could literally feel her wife's anxious hesitation, her heart breaking as a single tear slipped down a caramel cheek. "You were going to use the Epineurial closure like we talked about," she thoughtfully added, recalling the discussions they'd had concerning Derek's procedure as well as the pep talks she had granted her then apprehensive wife.

Callie nodded, once again swallowing against the lump that had formed in her throat. "Yeah, and just as I was about to suture the fascicles, Karev came through the OR door. He said that - that there was a problem."

Pulling her hand from within her wife's, Callie brushed the tears from her face as she stood from her seat, purposely distancing herself from Arizona in order to grant herself enough courage to continue. "He said that you were. . ._crashing_."

Callie's voice faltered just as it had on that fateful day. "I-I just couldn't believe it. I mean, I had just left you. You were fine. You were _great_."

Tears now filled Arizona's eyes, the memory of hearing similar words shouted as their friends and colleagues fought for _Callie's_ life after their car accident, quickly filling her mind.

"Then what happened?"

"Oh, God," Callie cried, her resolve weakening. "Please, Arizona. Please. . ."

"Tell me, Callie. I need to hear it."

Callie took a deep breath in an attempt to steady herself. "He said your temp was 104. Serum lactate was 6. . ."

"Septic shock." Arizona offered, having read this information in her chart.

"Yeah," Callie confirmed with a tight nod.

The brunette then paused before her tearful eyes once again met those of her wife. "He was looking to me for an answer, but I just needed to think. Alex needed to shut the Hell up and just let me think. I just needed a minute," Callie admitted with and embarrassed shake of her head. "So, I asked if he had you on pressors. But, he had already thought of everything, Arizona. Triple antibiotics, IV fluids. He had intubated you, started hydrocortisone. . ." Callie's tears were now freely flowing down her tormented face. "I just couldn't think. Not like a doctor, at least. You were still deteriorating. . ."

Arizona stood from where she had remained seated on the bench. "Callie. . ."

"Then he yelled at me. He said that you were dying! _Dying_, Arizona! You were _dying_! Your leg was literally killing you. You were _dying_!" Callie again shouted, her shoulders beginning to quake. Her nerves were shot, her emotions ragged. She had begged her wife for so many months to talk to her but, at no point in time, had she anticipated _this_. At no time had she considered that Arizona would need to hear the entire story uttered from her own mouth.

Ruefully shaking her head, Callie internally scolded herself. She should have known this would happen. She should have known that Arizona would need to hear the story directly from her.

"I'm not sorry, Arizona," Callie defensively huffed, angry at herself for allowing herself to fall apart. "I am absolutely _not_ sorry that I told him to cut it off."

Arizona's eyes angrily widened at the candor in her wife's statement. "Why didn't you try to save it?" she bitterly questioned. "Why didn't you leave Derek's surgery to help _me_?"

Callie irately glared at her wife. "You were _dying_! There was no more time, Arizona! I wanted to save it! I made a plan to save it but, at that point, had I tried - had Dr. Carlson tried - had any damn doctor in the entire hospital tried, you wouldn't be here right now! You were _dying_!" Callie adamantly repeated as she paced further and further away from her wife.

Neither woman spoke for several long and uncomfortable moments, the tension filling the distance between them, palpable.

"I didn't know _what_ to do, okay?" Callie finally admitted in a disparaging tone. "But, there was nothing I could have done, Arizona. Hunt wouldn't have let me operate so, had I left my OR, I would have just been forced to watch. To watch Alex cut off your leg."

Callie shook her head in frustration and guilt. She had been arguing with herself over her decision not to go to Arizona for the past several months. The situation had simply been impossible. "I couldn't do that, Arizona. I couldn't watch. . ."

"You were supposed to protect me, Callie! _Me_! Not Derek Shepherd!"

"Well, looks like I failed you both," Callie angrily retorted without hesitation. "I abandoned _you_ to perform a less than outstanding surgery on _him_. You lost your leg, and he still doesn't have full function of his hand. I did really well that day," she sarcastically chastised.

With brown eyes full of tears and tracks of moisture now staining her face, Callie carefully pondered her next words. "It was the only way. The decision I made that day was the only way to save your life," she honestly stated, once again wiping at her face. "Because, I knew I couldn't live without you, Arizona. I've done that before, and it totally sucked. So, I took a chance. I took a chance and made the decision to cut off your leg, hoping that someday - some way - you would eventually be able to forgive me," she heart wrenchingly explained, her voice lowering with each spoken word. And, then setting the baby monitor down on a nearby table, she slowly backed away. "But, I guess I was wrong."

* * *

Over an hour later, Arizona heard footsteps approaching the RV before seeing the door slowly open to reveal her wife.

Immediately taking her seat behind the wheel without acknowledging the blonde, Callie brusquely grabbed a map from the floor.

"Callie. . ." Arizona softly began from her seat on the couch where she had been reading _The Cat in the Hat_ to Sofia.

"We don't have to do this," Callie urgently cut her off. "It's totally fine. We can just go back to Seattle."

Arizona found herself surprised by the defeat evident in Callie's voice because, throughout this entire ordeal, the brunette had seemed so strong. She had supported not only Arizona and Sofia, but Mark Sloan and Derek Shepherd, as well.

When Arizona had scathingly berated Alex for being a selfish, thoughtless, horrible person, Callie had stood by her side. She hadn't judged.

When Arizona demanded she do something to save her leg, Callie fought Owen to approve a surgical repair over an amputation of the limb, even when the ortho surgeon knew deep down that an amputation and eventually a prosthetic limb would give the blonde a better quality of life.

When Arizona wanted nothing more than to rot away in bed, Callie had forced her up.

Callie had become. . .her _rock_.

Unfortunately, however, Callie's recent steadfast loyalty and unwavering protection were slowly beginning to fade, quickly being replaced by complete frustration and defeat.

Arizona sighed, wondering if she had pushed too far, scared that she had chipped away at her rock until - ultimately - there was nothing left.

"I think we should just go home."

Arizona shook her head on disagreement. "I don't want to go home, Callie. I'm not ready to go home," she anxiously admitted. "I want to be with you - right here - or wherever else you plan on driving this _thing_."

Callie looked toward her wife, unable to hide a timid smile.

"Since all of _this _happened. . ." Arizona gestured toward her left leg. "I've had so many conflicting feelings. Feelings I've never really felt before. Emotions that I'm not used to feeling - emotions that feel so foreign to me," she tried to explain. "This darkness isn't me, Callie, and sometimes, I have absolutely no idea who I am."

Silence filled the air, each woman lost in her own thoughts. "Sometimes, I don't know who you are, either," Callie finally admitted, standing from the driver's seat before making her way to sit next to her wife. "It's like I'm looking right at you, but you just aren't there, Arizona, and. . .I want you back."

"I'm here, Callie," Arizona softly whispered. "I'm right here, and I want to figure out how to be your wife again. I want to be Sofia's mom again. I need to make that happen, but this dark, angry, scared version of me seems to always be simmering right below the surface, and I don't know how to deal with it, Callie. I have no idea what to do, and. . .I'm scared. I'm so scared that one day this darkness is going to consume me, and I'm scared if that happens - if I allow it to take over - then, I'll lose you, Calliope. And, I really don't want to lose you."

Tugging Sofia from her wife's lap, Callie gently settled the little girl onto the floor to play with a pile of blocks before once again turning toward her wife and taking both of the blonde's hands in her own. "I'm not going anywhere," she simply replied.

As tough as things were and as frustrating as the constant shifts in her wife's behavior could be, the fact remained that Callie was here to stay.

"I'm not going anywhere," Callie gently repeated.

Arizona let out the breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. "I understand. . ." she nervously began. "I understand the decision you made. It's taken me a long time, but I finally understand, Callie. I really do. And. . .just. . .thank you. Thank you for choosing life."

Callie shook her head, reaching a trembling hand to tuck blonde hair behind an ivory ear. "It was never really a choice, Arizona. I'd make the same decision over and over, again and again," she honestly admitted, then leaning forward to brush a kiss against her wife's forehead. "I will _always_ choose _you_."

Allowing Callie's revelation to sink in, Arizona briefly searched Callie's eyes before hastily leaning forward, cupping her hand under a tanned chin with her fingers resting against a caramel cheek as she pulled the brunette in for a deep, searing kiss.

Caught off guard by her wife's sudden display of affection, Callie grasped both of the blonde's shoulders for support before pulling her closer, completely unable to deny her need to feel her wife's body pressed more firmly against her own.

Pushing herself up on her right knee, Arizona firmly grasped both sides of Callie's face as she continued her assault on those plump lips, taking full advantage of her elevated position.

"Mmm, Arizona," Callie murmured, breathlessly pulling away before thoughtfully casting her gaze toward Sofia who continued to contentedly play on the floor.

Following Callie's eyes, Arizona smiled before briefly kissing the corner of her mouth. "We're going to be okay, Calliope. We're going to make it."

* * *

"So, where to next?" Arizona excitedly asked, grabbing a map as she settled herself into the passenger's seat of the RV a few hours later. "Somewhere beautiful?"

"Everywhere we've been has been beautiful," Callie matter-of-factly replied as she started the engine and buckled her seat belt. "And - this time - I can't tell you where we're going."

Curiously glancing at her wife, Arizona's brow furrowed in confusion. "_Can't_ tell me? Or _won't_?" she suspiciously asked.

Callie only offered a coy smile as she expertly navigated the vehicle away from the camping area and onto the main road. "Well, I _can_ tell you that we're going to be driving for a while. We'll make a couple stops to sleep at night but, if it's okay with you, I have a certain destination in mind. . ." she vaguely offered. ". . .for your birthday."

Nervously biting her bottom lip, Callie then apprehensively glanced out the corner of her eye toward her wife, trying to gauge the blonde's reaction to her admission.

"Callie -" Arizona warned with a huff. "You know how I feel about birthdays. Don't like them. Don't celebrate them. . ."

Callie shook her head at her wife's ridiculous principles concerning her birthday. "I know, I know," she defended. "But, I really think you're really going to like this."

Arizona eyed her wife doubtfully.

"Hey, don't make that face," Callie cheerfully scolded. "I promise - it will be fun."

* * *

_Is she totally freaking out?_

Yeah, and she seems a little pissed.

_Maybe you should just tell her._

Are you kidding? I've driven over 2,000 miles through six states. There's no turning back now. Let her sweat. ;)

_LOL! You're mean._

Really? I think I'm sweet.

_Whatever. _

She's coming. Gotta go.

_Ok. Goodnight._

Quickly closing the text messaging app on her phone, Callie then set the alarm before placing the phone on the nightstand beside the bed and, rolling onto her side, she looked toward the bathroom door when she heard it slowly open.

Burrowing further into the warmth of the covers, Callie silently continued to watch the door for the blonde to emerge and, after several long moments, the door fully opened to reveal Arizona stepping out with the assistance of her crutches, her prosthesis removed prior to her entering the shower.

Leaning up onto one elbow, Callie met her wife's tentative eyes before allowing her gaze to rake over the rest of the blonde's body. And, after surveying perfect breasts under a light blue tank top, her gaze then dropped to the waistband of the pajama shorts she was wearing before finally returning to her wife's face.

Watching as Callie subconsciously licked her own lips, Arizona rolled her eyes.

"What?" Callie incredulously asked with a sheepish smile.

Leaning her crutches against the wall near the headboard, Arizona turned to sit on the edge of the bed and, quickly realizing the blonde's continued insecurity in the face of her lusty scrutiny, Callie reached forward to rub her back. "I'm sorry. I just. . ."

"No," Arizona hastily interrupted. "Don't apologize," she continued, finally crawling under the covers of the king sized bed. "It's not your fault. It's just -_sometimes_ \- I'm actually able to forget."

Moving closer to her wife, Callie rested her head in her hand, propping herself up on her elbow and, gazing down into the blonde's eyes, she tenderly began drawing arbitrary patterns over her exposed middle. "Forget what, sweetie?"

With a heavy sigh, Arizona once again rolled her eyes - this time at herself. "My leg," she earnestly admitted. "Sometimes – very rare, very fleeting times – I actually forget that it's gone. Sometimes I'm actually able to feel like _me_."

"You are you, Arizona. You are hot, and you are sexy, and I love you."

Searching her wife's eyes, Arizona found nothing but love, devotion, and sincerity in those deep chocolate orbs and, with a slight smile, she gently grasped at the tanned hand that continued to stroke her stomach before lacing their fingers together.

Smiling down at her wife's face, Callie was happy to see that most of the apprehension she had noted moments before had begun to dissipate and, deciding to take a chance, she then leaned forward, lightly pressing her lips to the blonde's for a chaste goodnight kiss.

Surprised by the hand that suddenly wove its way into the hair at the back of her head, Callie could do nothing but accommodate its insistence to hold her closer in order to deepen the kiss.

With her body immediately beginning to respond, a slight shiver coursed through Callie's form as her wife moaned into her mouth, their kiss deepening even further and, resting her left hand on top of Arizona's head, she gently clutched at blonde hair as her right hand bunched the front of her tank top.

Rolling onto her side to face her wife, Arizona continued to tug at the back of the brunette's head with her left hand, her right hand urgently squeezing her wife's left shoulder.

Pressing her hands into the bed on either side of her wife's body, Callie pushed herself up and over the blonde forcing her onto her back, their lips never losing contact and, happily encouraged by the hand she felt begin to massage her right breast, Callie lifted her right leg, moving herself to straddle Arizona's right thigh.

Gently settling her lower half onto her wife's lithe form, Callie gently traced her right hand over Arizona's chest, between her breasts, and then further south to lightly stroke her side while, at the same time, dragging her lips from the blonde's for the first time since the initiation of their kiss to trail hot, open mouth kisses down the pale skin of her neck. Nipping at the sensitive skin that covered Arizona's clavicle, Callie then moved the hand that continued to stroke Arizona's side upward, cupping a heaving left breast. Breathing a hot breath against an erect right nipple, Callie then scraped it with her teeth as it protruded through the fabric of her wife's tank top.

"Callie. . ." the blonde urgently breathed, pushing the fabric of her shirt up to stroke the muscles of a taut, caramel back with two insistent hands.

Pushing herself up on her right arm, Callie massaged Arizona's right breast with her left hand as she stared down into darkening blue eyes and, taking her wife's sexy smile as a sign to continue her ministrations, Callie quickly leaned down to once again capture the blonde's lips in a heated kiss.

Feeling Arizona urge her shirt upward, Callie reluctantly broke their kiss as she sat back on her knees to pull it over her head.

Sitting up along with her wife, Arizona massaged Callie's unrestrained breasts, eliciting a moan from the woman's now bruised lips.

Quickly leaning into the provocative touch, Callie pressed the blonde back into the bed as her lips once again continued their assault on those of her wife.

Pushing long brunette locks back from her wife's cheeks, Arizona settled her hands on either side of Callie's face before trailing them down her neck to once again grasp both perfectly rounded breasts.

"God, Arizona. You feel so good," Callie ground out as she trailed her right hand back down the blonde's side. Squeezing Arizona's left hip, Callie's hand then continued its descent down her wife's left leg.

Feeling the blonde quickly tense beneath her, Callie instinctively removed her lips from those of her wife to breathe a hot breath into her ear. "You're beautiful, Arizona," she honestly murmured before once again capturing her lips and, continuing to stroke the outside of Arizona's left thigh, Callie dropped her hand lower to gently cup and caress the base of the blonde's residual limb.

"No! Callie. . ." Arizona anxiously voiced after jerking her head to the side to brusquely pull their lips apart. "Stop. Please. . ." she pleaded, her body now completely rigid.

Hearing the desperation in her wife's voice, Callie immediately removed her right hand from Arizona's left leg. And, instantly disgusted by her own actions, she quickly scrambled backward and away from her wife.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, Callie's voice faltered. "I-I'm sorry. . ." she breathlessly panted, sincerity evident in her tone. "I'm so, _so_ sorry."

Hastily grabbing her shirt from where it had been discarded moments before, Callie then hurriedly pulled it over her head to cover her naked torso before moving to sit as far away from Arizona as she possibly could, her back leaning against the headboard as she desperately tried to calm her ragged breathing while still keeping a protective eye on her wife.

After what seemed like an eternity of uncomfortable silence, Callie cleared her throat. "Arizona?" she quietly called as she carefully placed her own shaking hand onto her wife's now trembling shoulder. Relieved when Arizona didn't flinch or pull away from her touch, Callie's heart ached when she heard soft sobs coming from her wife.

"I'm sorry. I- I didn't realize that was going to happen," Arizona said, her voice clearly unsteady from the emotions she was now feeling.

Tightly grasping the top of the comforter with both hands, Arizona closed her eyes, opening her mouth to exhale a breath of frustration. Desperately trying to gather herself as quickly as possible, she squeezed the bedding more securely in her hands as she pulled it up toward her neck to completely cover her entire conflicted form.

Finally opening her eyes in search of her wife, Arizona sighed. "Come back here, Calliope. Please," she vulnerably requested. "Lie down with me."

Seeing Arizona so distressed tore at Callie's heart and, pushing her own anxiety and guilt aside for the sake of her wife's comfort and security, she carefully moved forward, delicately placing a hand on Arizona's stomach while lying down next to her.

"I didn't mean to pressure you. I just. . ."

Arizona shook her head, refusing to hear none of it. "You didn't do anything wrong, Callie," she quickly interrupted, continuing to regretfully shake her head. And, briskly swiping at her tears, she then turned to Callie, embarrassment plus vulnerability clouding her beautiful features. "It's not your fault. I got caught up in the moment. God, I want you so badly. I thought I was ready. I'm sorry."

Studying Arizona's rigid posture and dejected demeanor, Callie inched closer to her, gently resting her cheek against the smooth skin of the blonde's bare shoulder. "Please don't be sorry," she tried to soothe, her right hand once again tracing patterns over Arizona's middle.

"It's been so long, Callie. I can't expect you to keep waiting for me," Arizona reluctantly admitted.

Pushing up onto her left elbow, Callie stared down into her wife's dejected eyes. "Yes, you can," Callie stated firmly. "I'll wait until you're ready."

A pouty grimace formed on Arizona's face. "But, what if I'm never ready?" she petulantly asked.

Callie chuckled softly, lightly stroking her wife's nose with her index finger. "You will be. You've - _we've_ \- already come so far. With everything. This is just another hurdle we have to tackle. We'll get there," Callie confidently insisted. "Besides, waiting's not so bad."

Arizona let out a huff, rolling her eyes. "It's not?"

"Nope." Callie smiled as she leaned forward to kiss the side of her wife's mouth. "Waiting makes the sex grow hotter."

"I thought it was absence makes the heart grow fonder?"

"Yeah," Callie chuckled as she nuzzled her nose into the crook of her wife's neck. "That, too."

* * *

The following morning, Callie quickly exited Sofia's bedroom, shifting the toddler from one hip to the other. "You ready to go?" she called, her voice bouncing off the closed master bedroom door.

Upon receiving no response, she pursed her lips in thought before trying again. "Arizona?"

"I'm coming, Callie!" the blonde huffed in frustration as she exited the master bedroom, quickly brushing past her wife and daughter to throw herself down onto the couch as she grumpily crossing her arms over her chest.

Callie raised one eyebrow, pressing her lips together to stifle a laugh. "Are you. . ._pouting_?" she playfully asked, setting Sofia onto her feet.

Arizona scowled at her wife. "I'm glad you're having such a good time with this, Calliope," she irritably retorted. "I don't want to go."

Glad her wife was more upset about her secret birthday surprise than she seemed to be about their mishap in bed the night before, Callie felt a worried weight lift from her shoulders. "Arizona, this kind of behavior isn't at all cute on our twenty month old daughter, so it certainly isn't cute on you," she chastised, even though she secretly loved it.

"Can't you just tell me?"

Callie shook her head. "Look," she interrupted. "I promise it's not going to be like my last failed attempt at surprising you. It's not a party. It's not going to be dark and hostile, and I promise no one will be jumping out at you. This is just - well, it's just a _thing_."

Arizona exaggeratedly rolled her eyes. "A _thing_, Calliope? _Seriously_?"

"Yes, Arizona - a _thing_," Callie reiterated, completely unwilling to give any further information. "I can't say anything else."

"Are you sure you can't say anything else?" Arizona asked, as she stood and stepped toward her wife, her pouty frown quickly morphing into a sexy smile.

"I'm positive," Callie firmly replied, playfully shaking her finger at the approaching blonde.

Reaching forward to grasp her wife's sides, Arizona smirked. "If I tickle you, can I get you to talk. . ."

"Nope," Callie firmly replied. "You'll get me to laugh."

* * *

Picking up the rental car. Be there is 30.

_How is she?_

Pouting. Totally pissed. I'm pretty sure she hates my guts.

_I hope this is worth it._

Sighing at the text and hoping the same, Callie quickly typed her response.

It will be.

"Okay. No more secrets, Callie. Tell me where we're going," Arizona demanded as she sat down in the passenger's seat of their rental car, abruptly slamming the door behind her. "And who the Hell are you texting?" she then asked, her voice rising as she tried to force the phone from Callie's hand. "You haven't texted someone this much since Mark. . ."

The blonde trailed off at her own mention of their daughter's father as she immediately gave up her fight for Callie's phone. "Sorry. . .I'm sorry."

Smiling slightly, Callie shrugged indifferently. "It's okay," she honestly replied before looking toward the back to make sure Sofia was securely buckled into her car seat. Turning back to face her wife, she then continued. "If you really have to know right now, I'll tell you. But, you only have like a half hour left to wait, so if you could. . ."

"I'll wait."

Callie gave her wife a relieved smile. "Thank you," she replied as she turned the key in the ignition to start the car.

Pulling back onto the road from the parking lot of _Enterprise Rent-A-Car_, Callie spent several minutes glancing between the road and her wife who sat silently looking out the window.

Sensing a shift in the blonde's mood, Callie reached her right hand toward Arizona's left, lacing their fingers together. Then, pulling their joined hands toward her, she gently kissed the back of the blonde's hand before resting it over her heart. "You thinking about Mark?"

Arizona sat silently for a moment longer before choosing to respond. "Yes. No. . ." she began, but then shook her head. "Just thinking about the crash, I guess."

Once again squeezing the hand that still rested against her chest, Callie then lowered their joined hands to rest on Arizona's left thigh. "You want to talk about it?"

Arizona shook her head. "Can we just talk about it later?"

Seeing Callie's slight nod of affirmation, Arizona forced a smile onto her face. "Because, my unbelievably amazing wife has a surprise for me for my birthday. Even though she's a few days early."

"I just can't win with you, can I?" Callie asked with a slight chuckle.

Arizona tilted her head to the side, a genuine smile gracing her face as she coyly deliberated her response.

"And as you ponder that. . ." Callie teased, "_we_ are here."

"Where?" Arizona asked, her head darting around as she searched her surroundings for any sign of familiarity or recognition.

Silently pointing to a large block sign in front of them, Callie navigated the car toward a checkpoint secured by two armed guards dressed in military attire.

_Welcome to Fort Sam Houston_

Stopping the car under the awning of the checkpoint area, Callie watched as Arizona's eyes found her _surprise _clad in sea foam green scrubs, a look of comprehension and possibly _dread_ reaching her wife's face.

"Teddy. . ."

Hearing the worry and fear evident in Arizona's voice as she breathed out her best friend's name, Callie was instantly confused and worried by Arizona's lack of enthusiasm and, mentally berating herself for what appeared to be another failed birthday surprise, Callie sighed.

Shit.

* * *

**AN: **I'm trying my best to get this story edited as quickly as possible, but the more I read, the more problems I find. Thank you all for being patient, and I hope to be able to continue re-posting at least one, if not two, chapters per day. Thanks so much for reading and taking the time to review.


	6. Chapter 6

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use.

Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Six**_

* * *

"Sorry I got pulled into surgery earlier," Teddy apologized later that evening as she handed Arizona a glass of Chardonnay. "We can finish the tour of the hospital tomorrow if you'd like."

"That would be great," Arizona replied as she settled herself onto the couch in the living room of Teddy's off-base townhome.

Sitting next to her friend, Teddy nudged Arizona with her elbow. "I can't believe how big Sofia has gotten," she mused taking a sip from her own glass. "She's so beautiful, Arizona."

A genuine smile graced Arizona's features as she reflected on her tiny brunette. "She really is wonderful, isn't she?"

Teddy nodded. "I can't believe it's been almost six months since I've seen you guys," she then mused before quietly adding, "You look good, Arizona."

Arizona took a sip from her glass of wine and, feeling uncomfortable under Teddy's amicable scrutiny and sincere compliment, she quickly stood from her seat. "You know, maybe I should go help Callie put Sofia to bed," she anxiously replied, looking toward the staircase.

"They were both already asleep when I looked in on them before I came downstairs," Teddy tried to reassure. "Bad ass Callie Torres asleep before 9:00pm. . ."

"I'm sure she's exhausted," Arizona instantly defended, hesitantly returning to her seat and taking another sip from her glass. "She's been driving for days. And, before that. . ."

Arizona trailed off.

Giving her friend a moment to collect herself, Teddy decided to urge her on when she had remained silent for too long. "Before that, _what_?" she asked.

Arizona shook her head. "We don't need to talk about this right now. This is supposed to be a happy visit, not. . ."

"I can tell there's something going on with you, Arizona. And, with all you've been through, I'm not surprised," Teddy quickly interjected, not allowing her friend to shy away. "You _can_ talk to me, you know."

Arizona took a deep breath, pausing momentarily before she spoke. "I was just going to say that Callie has taken a lot under her wing, lately."

Teddy remained silent, granting Arizona the time to continue on her own.

"After the crash, Sofia basically went from having three devoted parents to just one. Mark was in a coma, my leg was in an external fixator, and I was constantly sick from the infection. Callie worked her ass off and took care of Sofia while running between me and Mark, making sure we had everything we needed," Arizona began to elaborate. "And, on top of all that, she had to prepare for her surgery to fix Derek Shepherd's million dollar hand while also planning the surgery to fix my leg."

Arizona took a gulp from her wine glass. "Anyway, I'm sure she's exhausted," she earnestly added.

With uncomfortable silence then filling the living room, both women stared at the wall across the room, neither knowing exactly what to say.

"How are the two of you?" Teddy asked after several long moments.

Arizona contemplated the answer to her friend's question. "We - we're getting there," she honestly replied and, after another moment of silence, she then continued. "All I could think about while I was stranded in the woods was Callie and Sofia. How desperately I wanted to get back to them - how scared I was that I might never see their beautiful faces ever again."

Arizona looked toward the ceiling as tears began to pool in her eyes. Lowering her gaze back to her friend, she then steeled herself to continue. "We were out there for four days, Teddy. Four horrifying days. And for four days, my thoughts of Callie and Sofia were all that kept me alive."

Wiping a stray tear that slipped down her cheek, Arizona shook her head. "But, the longer we were out there, the more time I had to think. And, as time went on, I started to get pissed. Pissed at Alex, mostly. Because the only reason I went on that plane was because I was pissed at him for being so thoughtless and so unappreciative of everything I had done for him," Arizona explained as she settled back into the cushions of the couch, holding onto the wine glass that was balanced on her right knee. "Then I got pissed at Mark. . ."

Teddy searched her friend's face for explanation. "Why Mark?" she asked in confusion.

Taking a sip from her glass, Arizona hesitated before admitting her thoughts out loud. "I-I was pissed at him for not fighting harder. I didn't like myself for feeling that way, but I couldn't help it. I begged him to stay alive so we could go home together. . .to Callie and Sofia. But, he was just lying there, and he just kept _dying_. Christina kept saving him, but he just wouldn't stop dying."

"You shouldn't be ashamed of how you felt," Teddy tried to comfort.

Arizona shook her head, unable to find any consolation in her friend's words. "I think he kept me alive, though. He and Christina. . ." she quietly replied. "He was so warm, and he was lying on my lap - lying next to me - and Christina, she tried so hard to keep the _bugs_ out of the wound. She covered it with leaves, trying to form a barrier," she explained, cringing at the memory. God. . .it was so cold - so dark - I just wanted to go home. I knew if I made it home, Callie would know what to do to fix me."

Teddy couldn't help the tears that had now formed in her own eyes as she listened to her friend tell such a harrowing story. "Have you told Callie all of this?" she asked.

Arizona shook her head. "By the time we were rescued and then transferred back to Seattle from wherever the fuck, Idaho, there was just so much more to worry about," she explained and, staring down into her wine glass, she took another sip before continuing. "They originally repaired my leg with external fixation. Callie checked it every day - probably ten times a day - to make sure it was in proper alignment and that the surgical incisions were healing. But, the infection just wasn't improving. I was on IV Vanc, but it wasn't helping. Mark was still in a coma. I was. . ._hysterical_."

Teddy regarded her friend with the utmost respect and empathy. "Anyone would be hysterical at the thought of losing their leg, Arizona. And, sure, Callie was dealing with a lot, but she's strong."

"It wasn't just that," Arizona quickly admitted. "Callie also converted the external fixator they had used in Idaho to repair Derek's hand to an ORIF, and then she was making plans to surgically repair the nerve damage with a nerve graft. She already had all of this on her shoulders - she was dealing with all of us as well as trying to be a good mother for Sofia."

Arizona paused, shaking her head at the thought of the unbelievable load her wife had been forced to bear. "And, I was just _awful,_ Teddy. I begged her not to let them take my leg. And, she tried - so hard. She fought Owen - she forced him to approve surgery for intramedullary nailing as the final repair, even though she knew - Hell, even _I_ knew amputation really would be best."

A single tear trickled down Arizona's face. "She did that for _me, _Teddy. There was no way I could add any more to her plate. I couldn't talk to her about what happened to me out there. I just couldn't do that to her."

"She wouldn't have minded. . ."

"I just couldn't," Arizona repeated.

Teddy regarded Arizona with sympathetic eyes. "Is this _really_ the first time you've talked about it?" she suddenly asked in disbelief.

Arizona regretfully stared into her wine glass and, reluctantly nodding, she said, "For a while, things got better. Mark woke up, my infection was finally improving. The surgery to repair my leg was scheduled for the day after - the day after I went into septic shock. The day after Callie gave Alex permission to cut off my leg."

"They saved your life. . ."

"I know _that_," Arizona snapped in frustration. "But imagine trying to come to terms with the fact that the person you love most in the world - just try to imagine that person being the same person who was ultimately responsible for the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Imagine waking up with the last thing you remember being you telling your wife that she was outstanding - an amazingly good doctor - only to then find out that while she was fixing someone else, she sent another doctor to cut you to pieces."

Teddy's eyes went wide. "That's a little dramatic, don't you think?" she warned. "And, you would have done the same thing if it was Callie or Sofia. You would have chosen to save their lives," Teddy knowingly admonished. "And, don't tell me you wouldn't have because I was there, Arizona. After the car accident, you fought to save both of their lives."

Setting her wine glass onto the coffee table in front of the couch, Arizona leaned forward, her elbows resting on her thighs as thoughts of arguing with Mark over saving both Callie and Sofia's lives filled her mind. "I'm able to look at it like that _now_ but, in the beginning, I was just so pissed at her. And so, _so_ depressed. I don't blame her anymore, though. I really _do_ understand."

"I'm glad," Teddy admitted with a smile. "She loves you, Arizona. That much is obvious."

"I know," Arizona softly admitted, looking back toward her friend. "It's just been so hard. Mark is dead, and I was so paralyzed by my own grief and despair that I wasn't there for my baby when her father died. I wasn't there for my wife when her best friend died."

"I'm sure she understands," Teddy replied.

"She does, and we've talked about it," Arizona admitted, taking the final sip from her wine glass. "Things are _so_ much better, now. We'd started to mend things a little after I got my prosthesis, and then finally went back to work, but it wasn't the same. She and Alex were always watching over me, and they were right. I wasn't really ready to go back to work when I did. I stopped seeing the therapies which was a _huge_ mistake."

"Maybe you and Callie should consider couple's therapy," Teddy suggested.

Arizona smiled. "Honestly, this idea of hers - this cross country road trip in that big ass bus she bought. . ." Arizona trailed off with a slight chuckle. "It's been great. So therapeutic."

Teddy smiled at her friend, glad to see some life return to her face. "Just be honest with each other, Arizona. Don't hide from her and don't let her hide from you. Everything else will work itself out."

"Well, there's no hiding on this trip. That RV is big, but it's not _that_ big," Arizona admitted with a smile.

Teddy stood, gathering their wine glasses before walking toward the kitchen to place them in the sink.

Following behind her, Arizona leaned against the doorway. "Umm, I'm sorry I was so weird when we first got here. I. . .I just didn't know how you were going to react or how I was going to feel about you seeing me for the first time since. . ."

"You're still the same person, Arizona. If I didn't actually have the knowledge that something happened to you, I wouldn't be able to tell any difference," Teddy earnestly admitted.

Arizona considered Teddy's statement. Her friend was right - she really was fundamentally still the same person she had always been. Callie had been trying to get her to believe that for months, but for some reason it took an outsider's opinion to make her truly realize that fact.

"Thank you, Teddy," Arizona genuinely replied and, smiling brightly, she continued. "I'm exhausted - if you don't mind - I'm going to go join my girls for some sleep."

Teddy offered her friend a bright smile. "I don't mind at all," she happily replied. "And, you're welcome."

"See you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Arizona."

* * *

Reaching the door of the spare bedroom, Arizona silently entered, smiling at the sight of her girls sprawled out on the bed. Sofia lay in the middle of the mattress, arms and leg completely stretched out with Callie curled up on her side, one arm protectively draped over the child.

Extending her arms over her wife, Arizona gently lifted a tanned arm before extracting the sleeping toddler from the bed to settle her in the pack in play in the corner of the room. Then slipping out of her clothes, Arizona removed her prosthesis before putting on her pajamas. Crawling into bed next to her wife, she brushed the hair back from Callie's face as she placed a gentle kiss against her lips.

"Mmm. So tired," Callie mumbled in her half-conscious state.

Arizona found herself mesmerized by the beauty of Callie's face. "It's okay, Calliope. Go back to sleep," she soothed, scooting ever closer to her wife.

"What time is it?" the brunette asked, her eyes opening just slightly.

"A little before eleven."

Upon hearing that answer, Callie's eyes quickly opened more fully. "Oh, God! I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall asleep."

Arizona draped an arm over Callie's waist, nuzzling her nose against the smooth skin of a caramel neck. "It's okay. We _somehow_ managed without you," she teased.

"Did you have a good time?" Callie asked, placing a kiss on her wife's forehead.

"We _did_," Arizona honestly replied. "We _talked_. It was nice."

Callie nodded her head, happy that Arizona had been able to enjoy some time alone with her friend. "I'm glad," she then replied, quickly losing the battle to stay awake. "Love you, Arizona."

Arizona brushed a wayward strand of thick hair back from Callie's face. "I love you, too."

* * *

"Brooke Army Medical Center is the only Level I Trauma Hospital in the MEDCOM and is part of the Southern Regional Medical Command," Teddy explained as she led her friends through the halls of the 450 bed facility the following morning. "We provide inpatient and outpatient care. . .general medical and surgical care for adults and peds."

"Now you've got my attention," Arizona teased as she pushed Sofia through the hallways in her stroller.

Teddy rolled her eyes at her friend's seemingly one track mind. "This wing, though, is the Department of Orthopedics and Rehabilitation. . ."

"And now you've got _my_ attention," Callie mocked, earning a playful swat across her arm from her wife. "Hey!" she jokingly chided, grabbing her arm in mock discomfort.

Continuing down the halls, Teddy paused as two doctors approached. "Good morning, Dr. Altman," the eldest of the two gentleman greeted.

"Hello, Dr. Cole. Dr. McCartney," she replied, acknowledging both men. "I'd like you to meet two on my friends from Seattle. This is Dr. Arizona Robbins, Head of Pediatric Surgery and her wife, Dr. Callie Torres, Orthopedic Surgery at Seattle Grace Mercy West. Dr. Cole is Head of Orthopedics and Dr. McCartney is head of Neurosurgery here at BAMC."

After the adults exchanged pleasantries, Dr. Cole squatted down in front of the stroller. "And who do we have here?" her kindly asked.

"This is our daughter, Sofia," Arizona proudly replied.

"Dr. Torres," Dr. McCartney began, an air of recognition crossing his face. "We've heard a lot about you. You've made quite a name for yourself, lately."

Smiling politely, Callie looked confused. "And how is that, Dr. McCartney? Have you read about my cartilage research?"

The older doctor shook his head. "No. Cartilage may be interesting to you and Cole here, but I'm talking about the surgeries you recently performed on Derek Shepherd. _The_ Derek Shepherd. Amazing work, Dr. Torres. You should be very proud of yourself."

Callie's smile faltered as she swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat.

God - what a terrible day that had been.

To the outside world, she had singlehandedly tried to save the career of a world renowned neurosurgeon, but to her - well, that may have been the absolute worst day of her life.

"I. . .umm. . .well. . ."

"Yes, everyone at Seattle Grace Mercy West is very proud of her," Arizona quickly interrupted, sensing her wife's discomfort.

And, then looking directly into Callie's eyes, she continued. "_My_ wife is an amazingly good surgeon - a genius with a scalpel, if you will."

Both male doctors chuckled at Arizona's response, neither immune to her dimpled smile. "Well, ladies," Dr. Cole began. "Enjoy the rest of your tour with Dr. Altman, and we hope you enjoy your stay here in San Antonio."

As the two male doctors continued down the hallway, Teddy's pager blared. Stepping toward a nearby nurse's station, she said, "Let me just check this."

Turning back toward Callie, Arizona noticed the continued uneasiness in her wife's every feature. "You okay?" she asked as she watched Callie nervously wring her hands in front of her.

"Yeah. I think so. Maybe. Not really. . ."

Arizona shook her head at the disquietude deeply etched across her wife's every feature. "Stop, okay," she gently reprimanded.

Shaking her own head, Callie let out a ragged breath. "Sorry, I was just thinking. . ."

"I said _stop_, Calliope," the blonde reiterated. "I know what you're thinking, and you need to stop."

"Arizona. . ."

"No, Callie. What you did for Derek was amazing. He may not be ready for surgery, yet, but he will be. And, you should be proud of yourself," Arizona honestly admitted. "I know I am."

Callie searched her wife's face, finding nothing by pride, dedication, and love written across her every feature and, stepping closer to the blonde, she gently kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Arizona," she whispered in her ear before laying light kisses along her jaw. "Thank you."

Rejoining the group, Teddy smiled as she watched the familiar intimacy between her friends spring to life before clearing her throat. "I need to check on a patient in peds."

"_Sing it_!" Arizona happily cheered, quickly pulling away from her wife's moist lips. "That's awesome, Teddy! Can we come, too?"

* * *

"Children of active or retired military of all service branches are treated here, and the Department of Pediatrics provides care to over 40,000 patients annually," Teddy said as they entered the playroom of the pediatric ward.

Pausing to look around the room, Arizona smiled when she saw a young boy navigating his wheelchair toward them.

"Benjamin Joseph Everett, III. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, ma'am," said the boy who was no more than 10 years old.

"Arizona Robbins, M.D." Arizona happily replied, firmly shaking the boy's proffered hand. "It's a pleasure to make _your_ acquaintance, Benjamin."

Callie and Teddy smirked as Benjamin continued to flirt with the blonde. "I haven't seen you at BAMC before. Will you be working here, Dr. Robbins," he curiously asked.

"Oh, no," Arizona responded with a smile. "Dr. Altman is an old friend of mine. I'm just here for a visit."

"Dr. Altman has a _friend_?" Benjamin joked.

"Haha, Benjamin. Very funny," Teddy remarked with a smile. "And, I don't just have one friend. I have two. This is Dr. Callie Torres - she's my friend, too."

"Nice to meet you," Benjamin replied quickly before immediately returning his attention back to the new object of his affection. "When I was four weeks old, I was diagnosed with supravalvular aortic stenosis, pulmonary stenosis, and a genetic disorder called Williams Syndrome," Benjamin explained like the back of his hand. "Do you know what Williams Syndrome is, Dr. Robbins?"

Arizona tilted her head to the side, scrunching her face in mock concentration. "Yes, actually, I do," she replied as she took a seat on the couch next to her wife. "Did Dr. Altman perform a surgery on your heart?"

"Balloon valvuloplasty, yesterday," Teddy replied.

"Hey, I was gonna say that," Benjamin whined. "Dr. Altman says I can go home tomorrow if I promise not to run around too much. Right, Dr. Altman?"

"That's right," Teddy replied.

"I don't mind the hospital, though."

"Benjamin! Leave those nice ladies alone," interrupted a male voice from somewhere behind them.

"Dad!" Benjamin shouted upon seeing his father being wheeled into the room by a nurse. "Are you done with therapy?" the boy asked when his father got closer.

"Yep, just finished," he began as the nurse parked him near his son. "Had to tweak my new leg a little."

Instantly looking toward the man from where they were preoccupied with assisting Sofia in completing a Mickey Mouse puzzle, both Callie and Arizona surveyed him, noting the presence of a prosthesis on his right leg.

Glancing over the two women, Benjamin's dad's eyes settled on Arizona's left leg before moving to her face. "Sergeant First Class Benjamin Everett, II. 101st Airborne. Afghanistan. IED. You?" he knowingly inquired, his head motioning toward Arizona's left leg as he extended his hand in her direction.

Callie exchanged a confused glance with her wife. "How. . ."

"How did I _know_?" he asked with a slight smirk on his face.

"Yes, how did you know?" Callie quickly defended as Arizona remained silent.

Benjamin offered a coy smile. "I saw you up on the Rehab Unit," he matter-of-factly replied. "You're pretty good, but your stance phase is still a little off. Knee flexion instability can be a real bitch."

Callie instantly stood from her seat, protectively stepping in front of her wife.

"Callie. . ." Arizona warned, raising her hand to stop the tirade she was sure was about to spew from her wife's beautiful mouth and, pausing momentarily, she briefly considered her response. "Dr. Arizona Robbins. Peds Surgery. Dump Truck, Idaho. Plane crash," she replied, confidently extending her hand to the man.

Callie didn't know if she should be shocked or proud. Arizona had been so insecure about her leg that this response to the veteran's questions certainly was surprising.

"Nice to meet you Dr. Robbins," he smiled genuinely, shaking her hand.

"Please, call me Arizona," she replied with a dimpled smile.

"Well, in that case, Arizona, you can call me Ben."

* * *

"Is your wife always so defensive?" Ben asked Arizona from where they sat talking in the playroom.

Teddy had excused herself fifteen minutes prior, requesting Callie join her for a quick "consult".

Handing Benjamin the last piece of the puzzle he was helping Sofia complete, Arizona sighed. "It's a long story," she replied, unwilling to elaborate.

"Okay. . ." Ben said, dropping the subject.

But, after a moment's silence, he continued. "Look, every amputee goes through their own personal struggle. No matter what the circumstances are, the feelings are the same. Anger, denial, depression. . ."

"Definitely been through all of those," Arizona ruefully replied with a tight nod.

"Eventually, though, there comes _acceptance_. I've been like this for seven years, and after struggling for a long, _long_ time, I was finally about to work through my feelings in order to find peace. I have a wonderful wife, and a great son. . ." Ben stated as he reached out to tousle the hair at the top of Benjamin's head. "Looks to me like you have a great support system, too."

"I do. I really do," Arizona genuinely replied. "Callie has been amazing, and this one. . ." Arizona chuckled as she lifted Sofia onto her lap. ". . .is the dream I never knew I had."

Ben smiled as he turned toward his son. "You ready to get back to your room?"

"Yep," Benjamin happily affirmed. "They're having lasagna for dinner!"

Standing from his wheelchair, Ben stepped toward the chair his son was sitting in and grabbing the handles of the chair, he said, "When that nurse comes back for me, tell her I said to take that wheelchair and shove it where the sun don't shine."

Arizona laughed. "Will do," she replied. "It was nice meeting you, Ben."

"You too, Arizona," he said as he pushed Benjamin toward the door. "Thanks for the chat."

Smiling as the two Benjamins left the room, Arizona stood Sofia up on her thighs as she tickled the toddler's belly. "Lasagna does sound pretty good, doesn't it Sof?" Plopping the little girl down onto her lap to sit facing her, Arizona continued. "Maybe we can con mommy into making it for mamma's birthday."

"Excuse me, have you seen Sergeant Everett?"

Arizona turned to see a nurse entering the room. "Umm, yeah. He just took his son back to his room. He said to. . .he said he wouldn't be needing the wheelchair any longer."

The nurse rolled her eyes. "I should have known he'd do that," she laughed.

Arizona smiled, realizing that she would have behaved identically to Ben if presented with a similar situation.

"I'm Victoria, by the way," the nurse stated as she leaned on the arm of the couch.

"Arizona," the blonde replied. "And, this is my daughter, Sofia."

"Aren't you just a pretty thing," Victoria cooed as she took Sofia's hand, though her eyes were locked on Arizona, who naively continued to stare at her daughter's cherubic face

"Are you visiting a patient," Victoria asked, leaning in closer.

Turning her attention from Sofia, Arizona shook her head. "No. I'm here with a friend. We used to work together in Seattle. Do you know Dr. Altman?"

"Oh, Teddy," Victoria happily replied as she scooted closer to Arizona on the couch. "Yeah, some friends and I have gone for drinks with her after work a few times."

Arizona smiled, pleased to hear that Teddy was making new friends and socializing after her relocation and the death of Henry.

"That's great. I'm glad to hear that," Arizona earnestly stated, her attention then returning to her little girl.

Arizona expected that the nurse would then leave, sure that she had patients to tend to, but was surprised when she lingered, her body remaining inappropriately close to her own.

"How long are you in San Antonio?" Victoria asked, her eyes leaving Arizona's face to blatantly glance down at her breasts.

"Just until tomorrow, I think. I'm not sure where we're stopping next," Arizona mused, setting Sofia back onto the floor to play, completely unaware of the other woman's wandering eyes.

Placing her hand on Arizona's right thigh, Victoria leaned into the blonde's body, her scrub clad breasts gently rubbing against Arizona's arm as she rested her left arm on the back of the couch.

Shifting uncomfortably, Arizona blushed as she cleared her throat.

And, undeterred, the brunette nurse leaned in closer.

"Well, maybe Teddy can watch Sofia for you, tonight. I could take you out," she husked into Arizona's ear, unfamiliar lips brushing against an ivory ear lobe.

Completely shocked, but momentarily flattered by the young nurse's advances, Arizona froze.

Was this really happening? She only had one leg.

Shaking off that random thought, Arizona was finally able to gather her senses, gently removing Victoria's hand from her thigh. "Victoria," she began, her voice wavering. "Thank you for the offer, but I'm in San Antonio with Callie - my _wife_."

Victoria childishly pouted at the denial before reluctantly leaning away from the blonde, smiling as she stood. "That's too bad," she informed before grabbing the vacated wheelchair and leaving Arizona with a sultry wink as she exited the play room past a now tense looking Latina.

"Arizona. . ."

The blonde immediately stood from her seat and, turning toward the quietly distressed voice, she could tell that her wife had witnessed her entire interaction with the young nurse. "Callie, I. . ."

"No. I - I. . ._seriously_? Did that really just happen?"

Arizona swallowed hard, still unable to believe that she had just been hit on. "Well, in my own defense, I had no idea she was flirting with me. At least not right away."

"Uh-huh. . ." Callie wasn't convinced.

"Come on, Callie. Don't be so sensitive," Arizona remarked, trying to brush off the entire situation as she picked up Sofia to buckle her into her stroller. "It was completely innocent. "I, umm. . .I told her no."

Callie watched as her wife nervously fiddled with the straps of Sofia's buckle and, somehow managing to swallow her own pride, she remained silent, though she desperately wanted to scream and to yell.

Pushing the stroller closer to Callie, Arizona looked everywhere but at her wife, a nervous flush rising over her chest and cheeks.

She just couldn't look into those magical brown eyes, and she wasn't quite sure why.

Beginning to pace the floor, Arizona nervously scratched the side of her head, her thoughts a jumbled mess. "She was just flirting with me, Calliope," she stated, her voice registering complete shock.

"I noticed," Callie dryly replied, unsure of where her wife was about to go with that statement.

"I only have one leg, Callie, and she was flirting. . .with _me_!"

"Well, I can't say I'm overly thrilled about the idea of some other woman groping my wife, but I get it. I mean, you're _hot, _Arizona. Anyone with eyes can see that."

Arizona sighed, once again looking away. "Adjusting to the new me has been so hard, Callie. It's been disappointing and-and stressful and, unfortunately, I've not reached the point where I'm completely accepting of myself. Especially not intimately."

Callie's brow furrowed as she continued to watch her wife pace in an apprehensive circuit in front of her. "I know. . ." she offered, unsure of what else to say.

"But, I'm not going to lie to you, that felt _nice_. It reminded me. . ."

"_What_?" Callie spat, looking at Arizona as if she had just slapped her directly across the face. "I'm _really_ trying not to freak out here, Arizona. I'm trying to be understanding of the fact that I just caught you _touching_ and _flirting_ with another woman. But, umm, the fact that you just had the nerve to tell me that you. . ._enjoyed it_? That's not okay."

"Callie. . ."

"What the Hell, Arizona?"

"Will you please just let me finish?" the blonde requested. "Please. . ."

Callie incredulously stared at her wife, her stomach churning and her heart racing.

"It felt _good_. And, it reminded me that. . . I _like_ sex! I am very - _we_ are very - sexual people, Calliope!"

Callie's eyes went wide, completely in shock and, as she continued to stare at her wife, she found herself completely unsure if she was more stunned by the blonde's revelation or by the fact that she was basically screaming at the top of her lungs about their sex life in the middle of this hospital's playroom.

"It reminded me that when first getting to know someone, there are butterflies. . .and-and nerves, but there is also _excitement _and _romance_!"

Callie was clearly confused. "Okay?"

"In the beginning, I couldn't see past the physical," Arizona tried to explain. "Since the amputation, I've been preoccupied with the crippling thoughts that I don't have a shapely leg for you to admire – because let's face it – you've always loved my legs, Callie. And, I was worried that I'm not going to be able to wear shorts, or bathing suits, or lingerie. I was worried that my femininity was somehow compromised by the loss of my leg."

Callie's face scrunched; she was still completely baffled. "Can I buy a vowel here, babe?" she asked, totally bewildered and caught off guard by her wife's sudden and rambled revelation.

Arizona smiled, finally able to meet and hold Callie's gaze as she stepped into her space and, takingg tanned hands into her own, she gently squeezed them. "All I'm trying to say is that I think I'm finally able to see the _big_ picture. Re-building my self-esteem is going to be an ongoing process, but with you - with your love - and your support, there's a way of fighting back."

"You got all that just from a stranger looking at your boobs?" Callie petulantly asked, frustrated and more than a little hurt by the fact that she had desperately been trying to reassure Arizona of this exact thing for the past several months, but with one touch of another woman, it seemed that Arizona had finally figured it all out.

Arizona shook her head, unwilling to acknowledge that remark. "I feel attractive and sexy when I feel _confident_, Callie. And after today – and I'm not talking about the flirting – I feel more confident than I have in months, and that's all thanks to you. You dragged me on this trip. You're the reason I'm here. You're my reason for living."

Callie's face softened upon hearing her wife's heartfelt words. "I'm here for you, Arizona," she softly replied, still unsure of exactly what to say. "Whatever you need. I'm here."

Arizona smiled, relieved that Callie at least _seemed_ to understand what she was saying.

"Just. . .no more liking it when other women look at your boobs."

* * *

"Thanks again, Teddy. We'll call you from wherever we end up next," Callie said as she hugged her friend before carrying Sofia up the steps and into the RV early the following morning.

Turning toward Arizona, Teddy smiled brightly. "Try to remember what I told you, okay? Don't hide from her and don't let her hide from you. Fight for her just as much as she's been fighting. Don't lose her, Arizona."

Arizona nodded, moving into her friend's embrace. "Thank you, Teddy. Thank you so much. . .for everything."

"You're great, Arizona," Teddy said as she pulled out of the blonde's embrace, tears in her eyes. "Always remember that," she continued as she squeezed her friend's arms.

"You, too," Arizona earnestly replied, wiping a stray tear from her cheek as she ascended the stairs of the RV. "Don't be a stranger - come visit us, sometime."

Teddy nodded and waved as the she watched the door close behind her friend and, turning back toward her house after the vehicle pulled away, she smiled.

Sometimes, there are moments in life where you want to turn back, but those are the moments when you realize you have to go on.

* * *

**AN: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and review this story. I had no idea this re-post would be so appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Note the rating change for this chapter. Also, this chapter is more than just an edited re-post. A lot of what was originally written just wasn't sitting right with me, so this is basically a BRAND NEW chapter of a REALLY OLD story. I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

_**Chapter Seven**_

* * *

"_Sooo_. . .good surprise?" Callie asked as she questioningly glanced toward her wife who was seated in the passenger's seat of the RV.

Arizona smiled. "Of course it was a good surprise, Callie," she happily replied without even a moment's hesitation.

Callie chuckled, obviously pleased with herself. "Good because you got to see Teddy? Or - good because you got to flirt with a ten year old boy and get felt up by a hot brunette?"

Arizona pursed her lips in mock consideration. "I don't remember _you_ feeling me up, Calliope," she immediately countered, a playful smirk on her face. "Did you take advantage of me in my sleep?"

Callie returned her wife's cheeky grin, relieved that their visit had ended on a high note. Turning her attention back toward the road, she decided to take advantage of her wife's apparent positive mood by revealing her plans for a future part of their trip.

"So, umm, I thought maybe we could spend Thanksgiving with your parents. We haven't seen them since. . ." Callie paused, thoughtfully choosing to rephrase her statement. "We haven't seen them in a few months."

When no response came from her wife, the brunette glanced toward her, noting a pensive look on her face.

"Arizona?"

"When are we stopping again?" the blonde asked, the playful mood she had just exuded quickly being replaced by an uncomfortable and foreboding atmosphere.

Callie's heart sank as she turned her attention back toward the road. "We can stop whenever you want," she honestly replied, desperately trying not to assume the very worst. "You okay?" she asked, hoping beyond hope that her world was not going to come crashing back down around her.

Arizona continued to gaze out the window, her fingers nervously fiddling with the magazine she held in her hands. "This trip has really made me think, Calliope. About you and about me. It's just. . .the past six months have been the worst of my life," she softly stated, not once looking in the direction of her wife. "And, for a long time, I honestly didn't think we were going to make it."

Callie remained silent as she continued to stare at the road, ardently wishing she could somehow turn this conversation back around. They had been happily teasing each other just seconds before, but now, fearing what her wife would say next, she worried her bottom lip with her teeth as knots twisted at her gut.

Finally turning in Callie's direction, Arizona took a moment to stare at her profile before choosing to continue. "But. . .we _are_ going to make it. It's taken a long time, Callie, but I really think we're going to be okay."

Flicking her eyes to her wife, Callie felt her heart speed up. "Arizona. . ." she nervously began, but her voice faltered at a loss for words.

"But, there's just - there's still just this _one_ thing," Arizona stated into the vast abyss left by Callie's silence and, thoughtfully considering her next statement, she nervously cleared her throat. "I want - no - I _need_ to tell you everything, Callie. In order for us to move forward, I truly believe that I need to tell you _everything_ about the plane crash. It's important to me."

Callie let out the breath she didn't realize she was holding. "Of course," she nodded, visibly relieved by what she'd just heard. "Whenever you're ready to tell me - I'm ready to listen."

"I'm ready _now_," Arizona quickly replied. "Well, not like _right_ now. Not while you're driving. Just - whenever we stop," she nervously continued.

Callie took a moment to once again glance toward the anxious blonde. "Okay," she agreed with a reassuring smile. "We aren't far from Dallas," she explained with a quick glance at the miles listed on the GPS. "We can stop somewhere near there. We can have dinner, and then get Sofia ready for bed. Then, whenever you're ready, we'll talk. Sound good?"

Arizona appreciatively nodded, her mind instantly starting to work out where she would begin her tale.

"Sounds good."

* * *

Sitting across the table from her wife just three hours later, Arizona felt discouraged as she realized she was now more nervous than she anticipated, her earlier determination seeming to slip further and further away.

"I know you want to tell me, Arizona. But, if you're not ready, it's okay. I understand," Callie offered, taking her wife's hands into hers before resting them on the table top. "I don't want you to do this if you're not _absolutely_ sure."

Arizona shook her head, attempting to force the very last detail of her story into its rightful place.

"No. I need to do this. Just give me a minute. . ."

Watching as the blonde closed her eyes, Callie took a deep breath, willing herself not to cry just from watching the struggle her wife was currently experiencing and, when blue eyes finally opened to meet hers, Callie smiled reassuringly, allowing her all the time she might need.

"I was sitting on the left side of the plane. . .facing the cockpit. Mark was across the aisle from me, and Christina was in the seat behind me. I think. . .Lexie was behind her and Meredith and Derek were across from Lexie. . ."

Arizona paused, pondering the accuracy of her statement.

"No, Meredith and Derek were across from Christina. Not across from Lexie."

Callie nodded, not quite sure of the importance of her wife and friends' exact seating arrangement on the plane, but patiently taking it in and visualizing it, nonetheless. And, patiently waiting for Arizona to continue whenever she could, she was unwavering in her determination to allow her wife to tell the story in her own way - at her own pace.

"Looking out the window, I could see us kind of _rocking_ or maybe. . ._vibrating_, but we weren't falling. It just kind of felt strange," Arizona recalled as she stared blankly at an indeterminate spot on the wall behind Callie's head. "Then, I remember that it got eerily quiet as it became more and more obvious that something just wasn't right. I remember hearing twisting metal, feeling a rush of cold - _cold_ air. And, I think I even felt us hit the ground - or maybe it was the trees - I'm not quite sure," she admitted, begrudgingly shaking her head at her own uncertainty. "But, it was like we bounced, and then suddenly skidded to a halt."

Arizona again paused, her eyes glassy with unshed tears.

"The next thing I remember was the sound of screaming, and it just wouldn't stop. I couldn't think, and I just needed the screaming to _stop_."

Callie squeezed Arizona's hands in her own before reaching forward to wind a stray lock of hair behind her wife's ear.

Closing her eyes, Arizona leaned her face into her wife's comforting hand. "Then I heard Christina shout something like, 'Shut up! Just - shut up!' And that. . .that's when I realized that the screaming was coming from _me_."

Callie slowly pulled a shaking hand away from her wife's face and, willing herself to be stronger - to not allow her own emotions to get in the way of Arizona's need to tell her this harrowing tale - she tightly clasped her own hands together when the realization hit that this story was only going to get worse.

"I was just lying on the ground, unable to really move, but Mark, Christina, and Meredith seemed to be in fairly decent shape. We didn't know about Derek or Lexie - they weren't in the immediate area. So, they went to look for them. They just left me there, Callie - they left me all alone."

"Arizona. . ."

"No. I get it, and it's okay. Mark loved Lexie. Christina is Meredith's person - or whatever - and, they needed to find Derek. I get it. . ."

"Mark shouldn't have left you," Callie argued, suddenly feeling irrationally angry at her deceased best friend.

"He needed to find Lexie, Callie. So, umm. . .I pulled myself off the ground and sat up against what was left of the side of the plane. My left leg hurt so, _so_ badly. I knew it was broken, and there was already a puncture in my scrub pants, so I ripped them apart the rest of the way."

Callie took a deep breath through her nose, exhaling via pursed lips and, sensing that Arizona needed her close in order to get through the rest of the story, she quickly moved her chair around the table, taking a seat as close to her as she possibly could.

"At that point, I think I started to hyperventilate. God, it was just so _shocking_. I mean, I think I was in a little bit of shock, because for a while I just couldn't stop laughing," Arizona explained, her lips twitching into the briefest of smiles before dropping back into a thin line.

"Jerry - the pilot - was paralyzed. They found Derek and Lexie, and I don't know what or when it happened, but she was. . .dead. And, Mark - Meredith had to do a damn pericardiocentesis with the pump of my hairspray bottle in the middle of the freaking woods. Derek's wound was held together by a safety pin. I splinted my own leg. . ."

Arizona paused, shaking her head. ". . .and that was just in the first four hours."

Callie closed her eyes. She knew hearing this was going to be difficult, and she had tried to prepare herself for months for this exact moment, but no amount of planning or preparation could have ever readied her for _this_.

"Jerry had stopped talking. I wasn't sure if he was dead or alive. We ran out of water. There were no more matches. Christina kept trying to keep the _bugs_ out of my wound. I'm pretty sure animals - _ate_ \- Lexie. . ."

Callie's eyes widened at that revelation and she covered her mouth with her hand, unsure if she could continue, but knowing she had to. She needed to do this for her wife - if Arizona could survive it, then she needed to force herself to be strong enough to at least listen to her talk about it. So, slowly moving her hand from in front of her face, she swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat.

"Four days, Callie. That's all it was. It doesn't seem like it would be so bad. But, it was. It was horrible - and _terrifying_ \- and, for four days, all I could think about was you and Sofia. I begged Mark to stay alive, but he just kept dying. And, I was pissed because I couldn't understand why he didn't want to go home to you and Sofia as much as I did. All I wanted was to come home to you, and I kept telling myself that, if I made it home, you would know what to do to fix me."

Silence filled the room as Arizona considered what to say next and as Callie found herself once again drowning in a sea of guilt and shame at her inability to help her wife. She'd only recently been able pulled herself from this drowning sorrow, but found herself quickly slipping back into it.

"Arizona, I'm so, _so_ sorry," Callie finally whispered as she wiped a single tear from her own face. "I failed you. I. . ."

Callie trailed off, looking down to where their joined hands now rested in her lap.

"Shhh. . ." Arizona tried to soothe as she placed a hand under Callie's chin, pulling her head up so she could meet her gaze. "You did everything you possibly could."

Callie shook her head as more tears began to brim in her repentant chocolate eyes. "I've built arms out of nothing - and legs like _God_ \- but, for you - the most important person in my life - I couldn't do anything. I did _nothing_."

Taking the now freely crying brunette into her arms, Arizona held her tightly, allowing her to cry into her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry," Callie whispered through her tears and she clung to Arizona's body for dear life.

The weight of the raw emotions coursing through Arizona's mind and body soon broke away - the last brick in the walls she had erected since the crash - finally crumbling into nothingness as she too began to cry.

But, this time, Arizona wasn't crying because she was in pain. She wasn't crying because she'd lost her leg. No, this time, Arizona cried because it wasn't until that very moment that everything had finally fallen into place. It wasn't until just then that she finally realized that while she had been so preoccupied with the loss of her leg, she'd never fully allowed herself to embrace and be happy about one simple truth. . .

She was _alive_.

And so, she wept. For her loss, but also for her life.

When their tears finally slowed, Callie pulled away from her wife more quickly than Arizona was expecting, hastily wiping her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that," Callie stated as she used her thumbs to cast away the tears from Arizona's face.

Arizona smiled before leaning forward to kiss away the remaining tears from Callie's face. "I love you, Calliope. I love you so much."

Callie nuzzled her nose against the soft skin of Arizona's cheek and, gently continuing its soft caress over the side of her face, she lovingly stroked her other cheek with the tips of her fingers.

"I love you, too," Callie husked into Arizona's ear before placing her index finger beneath the blonde's chin to tilt her head up before taking Arizona's lips into a gentle, yet insistent kiss.

Wrapping her left arm around Callie's waist, Arizona clutched the shirt covering her wife's middle as she leaned further into the passionate joining of their lips.

Running her right hand from Arizona's cheek, down her neck, and then across her chest, Callie urgently clung to her wife's left shoulder as she pressed her breasts firmly into the front of the blonde.

Pulling back, desperate for oxygen, Arizona pushed long brunette hair back from the Latina's cheek before taking both sides of her face into her hands. Smiling nervously, Arizona stared into Callie's lust filled eyes - a silent, but profound message transpiring between them - as Arizona leaned forward, briefly nipping at Callie's bottom lip and pulling it back between her teeth before releasing it with an audible pop.

Quickly recapturing the blonde's mouth, Callie gently ran her tongue along Arizona's bottom lip, begging for entrance into the warmth of her mouth. Feeling her wife's tongue flick against her own, Callie moaned in encouragement before deepening the kiss even further, fully allowing her tongue to explore its mate.

Then, blazing a trail down Arizona's neck with her lips as her right hand gently cupped the blonde's left breast, Callie heard her wife gasp as she started to nip at the other breast through the fabric of her shirt and bra.

"Callie. . ." Arizona breathed out. "Please. . ."

Pulling back to search her wife's face, Callie started to move away from the blonde, but was surprised when Arizona grabbed both of her forearms, pulling her in even closer than before. Kissing down Callie's neck, Arizona then forced herself to lean back so she could stare into the deepest recesses of her wife's beautiful soul.

"Take me to bed, Calliope," she whispered, her face flushed with need. "Make love to me."

* * *

Shutting the bedroom door behind them, Arizona turned back toward her wife who now stood staring at her from her position at the foot of the bed and, crossing the room, Arizona stepped up in front of her wife, her left hand trembling as she pushed her fingers through thick brunette hair.

Wrapping her arms around her wife, Callie pulled her in close before turning them around so the backs of Arizona's legs hit the mattress at the foot of the bed. Callie then cautiously searched the darkening blue eyes that continued to longingly stare into her own and, gratefully finding no hesitation present in those gorgeous blue depths, she quickly found herself wholly consumed and unquestionably aroused by the sheer determination and wanton lust she found there.

Callie hadn't seen Arizona look so sure about anything in months and, gently pushing on the blonde's shoulders, she carefully urged her to sit down.

Reverently kneeling between Arizona's legs, Callie looked up into blue eyes, refusing to allow her gaze to falter as she began to unfasten the buttons at the front of her wife's shirt. After discarding it, Callie then ran her lips over Arizona's chest and neck as her fingers feverishly worked to unhook the front latch of the light purple lace bra still covering two perfectly rounded breasts.

Looking down at her wife, Arizona intently watched as the brunette completely removed her bra before then palming her left breast as she started to devour the other with her mouth.

"Mmm, Callie. . ." Arizona moaned, tossing her head back on her shoulders as she felt her right nipple go from hot and wet to cold and hard under the ministrations of her wife's tongue and lips.

Forcing herself from that taut peak, Callie then kissed the valley between Arizona's perfect breasts before rewarding Arizona's left breast with the same loving attention the right one had just received.

Callie luxuriated in the whimpers and sighs that fell unabashed from Arizona's moist lips as that nipple perfectly puckered in her mouth but, forcing herself to lean away, Callie's eyes once again locked with those of her wife, deft hands slowly working to unbutton the blonde's jeans before lowering the zipper at a painstakingly slow pace.

With her gaze never wavering, Callie then urged Arizona to raise her hips off the bed before curling her fingers into the waistband of her wife's jeans in order to pull them over slim hips and down silky thighs.

Swallowing hard, Arizona jerked her eyes away from Callie's penetrating gaze as she desperately attempted to suppress the worries and doubts that suddenly consumed her at the presence of her wife so very close to touching her prosthetic leg.

"Calliope. . ."

Callie watched as the muscles in Arizona's shoulders visibly went taut, the blonde's chest rising at the inhalation of a deep breath and, slowing her ministrations for a brief moment, she paused.

She would wait; she would allow Arizona all the time she might need. But, when blue eyes finally reopened, Callie again gazed into those glorious azure orbs before pressing herself upward to gently kiss pink lips.

"You're perfect, Arizona. Let me love you, baby."

When Arizona only continued to stare at her, Callie decided to be brave - to take a chance - continuing to lower the blonde's panties and jeans.

Wholeheartedly consumed by the mixture of lust, love, and undying commitment she recognized in her wife's chocolate eyes, Arizona found herself completely unable to force herself to halt Callie's wandering hands, instead choosing to lean back on her elbows, biting her bottom lip as she watched Callie painstakingly remove the clothing before tossing them to the floor.

Flinching slightly when her now discarded pants revealed the cool metal of her prosthesis, Arizona let out a staggering breath as she once again forced herself to find Callie's devoutly encouraging and understanding eyes.

Grasping both of her wife's hips in her hands, Callie caressed down the outsides of smooth thighs before returning her hands upwards to repeat their downward path against the sensitive skin at the insides of Arizona's thighs.

Momentarily breaking their gaze to briefly glance down at the prosthetic limb, loving brown eyes quickly flicked back to unsure bright blue and, Arizona found herself shocked, but undoubtedly aroused when Callie lovingly begin to caress the plastic socket as if it were the sexiest thing she had ever seen.

Then placing an exalted kiss against the metallic joint of the prosthetic knee like it was an organic part of Arizona's body - as if it were completely equal and beautiful as its mate to the right, Callie then gently tugged at the socket, expertly removing the prosthesis and setting it to the side.

Looking back up, Callie again locked her eyes with those of her wife as she slowly lowered the cotton stocking from Arizona's residual limb. "You're beautiful," Callie whispered before tearing her eyes away long enough to place feather light kisses along the scarred base of the limb.

Arizona briefly tensed at the sensation but, inhaling another deep breath, she tangled her hands in thick brunette hair as Callie pushed through her own nerves, relentlessly placing devout kisses against the residual limb.

Feeling Arizona relax, Callie glanced upward, forcing her lips from her wife's intoxicating skin. "Scoot back," she gently urged as she stood from her kneeling position to climb onto the bed with her wife.

"I feel like I don't know how to do this anymore," Arizona apprehensively stuttered, but did as Callie requested, scooting her body up the length of the bed.

Callie offered her wife a sympathetic smile. "Let me help you remember," she softly insisted, a sexy smile tugging at her mouth as she deftly moved to cover her wife's entire form, carefully positioning herself between alabaster thighs.

Grasping the back of Arizona's head with both hands, Callie briefly held her blue eyed gaze before leaning in to join their lips in an urgent, but romantic kiss. Then, pulling back and resting her cheek against a silky ivory chest, Callie lost herself in the thundering rhythm of her wife's very alive and beating heart as she adoringly kissed and nipped at the soft skin she found there, thankfully encouraged by the sound of an eager moan and the sensation of the insides of Arizona's thighs squeezing at the outsides of her hips.

Trailing her hands down the sensitive skin of Arizona's sides, Callie then fiercely squeezed at slight hips, losing a bit of control as she forcefully rocked her own pelvis downward against the unmistakably heated flesh of Arizona's core.

"Oh, God. . ." Callie moaned - unashamed - at the contact she had been craving for months.

Arizona's head tipped back into the pillow at the sensation of Callie's clothed womanhood pressing so intimately against her own and, insistently grasping at a curvaceous bottom to hold her wife close, she simply was unable to stop herself when her own hips began to thrust upward, desperately seeking the stimulation she knew she needed to reach her release.

Quickly sliding her hands from Callie's jeans to the hem of her shirt, Arizona urged it upward, smiling when Callie got the hint.

Sitting up on her knees and removing the garment the rest of the way, Callie then briskly reached behind her own back to remove a black lace bra.

Sitting up, her right leg now positioned between those of her wife, Arizona found herself mesmerized by the voluptuous breasts that had just been revealed, her tongue quickly darting out to wet suddenly arid lips.

Callie curiously watched Arizona, patiently awaiting the go ahead for her to make her next move but, when she saw her wife suddenly hesitate just as her hands were about to make contact with the button of her jeans, her face fell, fearing that she had taken this too far.

"Arizona?"

The woman in question seemed to flinch at the sound of her own name, her head now turned downward as she quietly forced her gaze away from the sight of her amputated limb to stare at the patterned duvet.

Swallowing hard, Callie fought with herself over what to do next and, ultimately deciding that she would not allow them to be set back, she anxiously ran her hands up and down the tops of her own jean clad thighs before she spoke.

"Look at me."

The blonde shook her head, adamantly refusing to do as she'd been asked. "Callie. . ."

Pushing through despite her uncertainty and fear, Callie cautiously leaned in to kiss Arizona's temple, the warmth of the brunette's closeness causing the other woman to quickly glance up in her direction.

Offering the overwrought blonde a shaky smile, Callie tipped her head to the side, her eyes scanning over her wife's flawless, ivory face. "You're beautiful, Arizona. So, _so _beautiful. Inside and out," she genuinely began, placing her hand against a trembling chin, refusing to allow her to look away. "Nothing in this world is ever going to change that, sweetie. And, there is absolutely _nothing_ that will ever make me see you _any_ differently. You amaze me every single day, Arizona and, right now, I want you so badly."

Looking up into the most sincere eyes she had ever seen, Arizona found herself completely unable to move her own eyes away from the infinite depth of Callie's dark and seductive gaze. And, digging her teeth into her bottom lip, she slowly moved Callie's hand from where it rested against her chin.

Callie's heart immediately sank and, just when she thought for sure that Arizona was going to push her away, she found herself completely shocked when the blonde instead guided her hand to rest against a scarred lower limb.

"Slowly, Calliope," Arizona breathed out, her palm slowly guiding Callie's hand further up her leg. "Make love to me. Slowly."

Callie's eyes fell shut when Arizona's palm then further guided her hand to meet the wet heat at the apex of her thighs, a breathy gasp falling from Callie's lips when moist lips encircled her already hardened right nipple.

"You feel so good," Callie breathed out as her head fell back on her shoulders, the caramel fingers that Arizona held trapped between her own palm and aching center, slowly moving to caress slick folds, just at her wife had requested.

Somehow, they soon managed to remove Callie's pants with their free hands, Arizona adamantly refusing to move her hand from where it held Callie's trapped against her. "Just like that," she breathed out, her brow furrowing in concentration as she reveled in the pleasurable expertise of Callie's hand. "Touch me, Calliope. Just like that."

Sitting on the bed to mirror her wife, Callie scooted in close and, slipping her left leg over top of Arizona's right, the other long, caramel leg then slid to rest beneath a shortened left limb. And, with their wanton centers now inches apart, but too far away to touch, Callie then reached out for Arizona's free hand, guiding it to rest against her labia just as the blonde had done to her just mere moments before.

With their eyes locked together, they soon found a slow, but steady rhythm, Arizona's left hand continuing to guide Callie's right as she mimicked the same cadence with the hand Callie provocatively held against her own heated core.

Gazing into Arizona's aroused blue eyes as they continued their seductive ministrations against hardened bundles of nerves, tight entrances, and slick folds, Callie found herself shocked by the profound intimacy of what was currently transpiring between them and, judging by the look in those heavily lidded cerulean eyes, she could tell that Arizona felt it, too.

Just like their relationship, this was different. It was all knew, and when Callie felt a single digit slip into her needy opening, she leaned her forehead against that of her wife before positioning their faces cheek to cheek, needing to be as close to her - both physically and emotionally - as she possibly could.

"Oh. . .Callie. . ." Arizona murmured into a caramel ear when Callie followed suit, a long middle finger easily slipping into her entrance as a deft thumb drew impossibly perfect circles against her engorged clit.

"God, yes. . ." Callie moaned, nipping at Arizona's earlobe as her body began to feel the initial stirrings of rapturous delight.

With two sets of hips beginning to involuntarily thrust and knowing hands and digits continuing to seductively caress in just the right way, it wasn't long before Arizona's body went rigid, her mouth opening in a silent scream as the most intense orgasm she had ever experienced ripped through her body while, at nearly the exact same time, she felt her wife's internal muscles tightly clench around her finger.

"Oh, Fuck!" Callie gasped, her body harshly tensing before dissolving into a fit of intense jerks and fervid quivers.

With the two gasping and panting women trembling against one another in the center of their king size bed, it was clear that they had profoundly been reunited - both body and soul - and, as Callie protectively held her wife's quaking body against her own, she adoringly and reverently whispered promises of love and devotion for the rest of their lives against her ear.

"Oh, my God. I love you, too," Arizona finally breathed out against Callie's neck before allowing the other woman to lay her back against the duvet.

Scanning over Arizona's face and finding no evidence of regret in her sated cerulean eyes, Callie then stretched out on her side, lying against the full length of Arizona's form. "I missed that," the brunette sheepishly replied, completely unable to stop staring down at her wife's gorgeous face.

Gazing up into magical brown eyes, Arizona first thought to talk to her wife about what had just happened between them but, choosing to save that for another day, she gently trailed the pad of her left index finger down the faded scar between Callie's breasts. "Thank you, Calliope," she simply stated, her voice barely above a whisper.

Smiling at the other woman, Callie didn't respond, choosing instead to nuzzle her nose against the side of her face.

"We are _never, ever _waiting six months to do _that_ again," Arizona teased with a dimpled grin, attempting to lighten the intensely profound, but unbelievably euphoric, mood and, rolling onto her side, she tantalizingly pressed her front against that of her wife.

Returning Arizona's smile, Callie then leaned down to place a gentle kiss against moist, pink lips. "I love you," she said before again pecking those intoxicating lips. "I love you." _Peck_. "I love you." _Peck_.

Arizona's heated body was -unfortunate - quickly beginning to cool, and she shivered when Callie ran gentle fingers down her side.

"You want your pajamas?" Callie asked, watching as goose bumps erupted over her wife's arms.

"If you don't mind," Arizona replied as she watched her wife's naked body move to the dresser to gather their clothes.

Once dressed and snuggled under the fluffy duvet, Arizona rested her head on Callie's shoulder as the brunette pensively ran her fingers through blonde hair.

"What are you thinking about?" Callie whispered into the silence of the room.

Arizona smiled; her wife knew her well. "Just wondering what I ever did to deserve you," she honestly mused. "You're amazing, Calliope. . ."

Callie shook her head, holding Arizona close. "No babe," she softly contended, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "_We're_ amazing."

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and review. I look forward to seeing what you think about this chapter! Reviews, questions, and comments are always welcome. Thanks again.


	8. Chapter 8

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thank you all for continuing to read and review!

* * *

_**Chapter Eight**_

* * *

The following morning, Callie leaned on her elbow, her head in her hand as she lovingly stared down at her sleeping wife and, sighing in contentment, she leaned down, gently pressing a moist kiss against Arizona's shoulder.

Settling her head back into her hand, Callie continued to gaze over Arizona's delicate ivory features, her mind wandering to contemplate the events of the past six months. And, hoping that last night was the beginning of only good things to come, she suddenly realized that right then – in that moment – she felt more grounded and secure in their relationship than she had in a very long time.

The previous night had been nothing short of amazing – and not just because Arizona had trusted Callie enough to allow her to make love to her again – but, more importantly, she had finally let her _in,_ both physically and emotionally.

Arizona had finally allowed the protective walls she had erected to crumble, fully trusting her wife with the knowledge of the absolute worst and most terrifying event that had ever happened to her. Well, at least the most terrifying until a couple months later when Callie had been forced to make the decision to either let Arizona die or amputate her infected leg.

Callie shuddered as she considered how she would have reacted had _she_ been the one who had awakened to find that her own body had been disfigured at the hands of another.

What would it be like to wake up unsure of what her life was going to be like?

Callie shook her head as she continued to gaze at her wife. In reality, she _did_ know how that felt. Because, she _had_ awakened not all that long ago with that uncertainty. She _had _awakened completely unsure if she would ever walk again or if she would ever again stand at an OR table - unsure if she would ever have the upper body strength to hold her newborn child.

As unbearable as the time after the car accident had been, she had eventually healed with few residual, long-lasting effects. Sure, she still had the surgical scars, and sometimes she would guard her left arm when it ached or when it weakened after an exhausting day at the hospital, but none of that compared to the physical and emotional wounds suffered by her wife.

Wounds that Callie blamed herself for.

Wounds that unfortunately were necessary to save Arizona's life.

Callie knew that some of their friends and colleagues condemned Arizona for the way she had behaved toward her after the amputation. Some probably even thought that Callie shouldn't have stood by and tolerated the berating behavior Arizona venomously spewed at her. They thought Arizona should have been nothing but grateful to her for choosing to save her life.

But, Callie didn't see it that way.

Because, she wasn't completely innocent.

She wasn't a hero.

Callie would be lying if she tried to deny that Arizona's contempt and disregard for her feelings hadn't bruised her, but she simply couldn't blame her.

Arizona was her wife.

She had chosen Arizona to be the one with whom she would spend her life and, no matter what, that was what she intended to do.

"You only watch me sleep when something's up. . ." Arizona mumbled, slowly opening her eyes.

The sound of her wife's sleepy voice quickly drew Callie from her thoughts and, with a smile now tugging at her lips, she briefly pecked at Arizona's mouth before turning to settle onto her back, a playful grin remaining on her face.

"You're in a good mood for so early in the morning," Arizona quipped, reaching to glance at her phone, noting the time on the display read 6:53am.

Rolling back into her side, Callie nuzzled her nose against the side of Arizona's face. "Mmhm," she hummed before nipping at a fair earlobe. "I got lucky last night."

A broad smile lit Arizona's entire face, her own thoughts then returning to the events of the previous night. And, rolling onto her side to face her wife, she leaned in, capturing full lips with her own. "Mmm. Me too," she cheekily replied once she pulled away from Callie's inviting mouth. "Any chance we could repeat that again sometime soon?"

Callie laughed, pleased with her wife's train of thought. "Maybe. . ." she teased, shrugging her shoulders.

"_Maybe_?"

"Yeah, my schedule is kind of insane right now, so I'll get back to you. . ."

Swatting at Callie's right hip, Arizona then rolled on top of her clothed body, effectively pinning her to the mattress, both women laughing at the brunette's joke.

"You're mean," Arizona admonished, gently smoothing her hand over Callie's tousled brunette hair.

"Yeah, but you love me."

Arizona couldn't deny it. "I do," she honestly admitted with a cheeky grin before leaning back in to once again kiss those glorious lips.

Pulling away from her wife's now roaming hands and mouth, Callie quickly pecked at Arizona's lips before pushing against her, successfully freeing herself to jump up from the bed, the blonde landing back on the mattress with a huff.

"Wha. . ."

"I've got _huge_ plans for us today, babe! I'm so excited. . ._this_ is going to be so much fun," Callie cheered as she quickly moved around the bedroom, opening and closing drawers, grabbing clothes and socks and anything else she might need on her way to the bathroom for a quick shower.

"More fun than _me_?" Arizona petulantly shouted toward the now closed bathroom door, still shocked that her wife had thrown her off of her, effectively denying her highly sexual advances.

Peeking her head through a crack in the door, Callie laughed. "Not quite," she teased. "But _almost_!"

* * *

Sitting at the dining table and assisting Sofia with her breakfast as Callie leaned against the countertop sipping her second cup of coffee, Arizona shook her head, completely shocked by what her wife had just proposed

"You're kidding me, right?" she incredulously asked, eyebrows raising, a mixture of complete amusement and utter confusion written across her face.

Callie sheepishly shrugged her shoulders. "It's something I've always wanted to do," she tried to defend. "Ever since I was twelve, and we read about it in school. Daddy planned to take me there on vacation the following summer, but my mom and Aria thought it was silly, so we ended up in Spain. . ._again_."

"You're really serious about this. . ."

"Umm. . .yeah?" Callie apprehensively replied, nervously taking a drink from her coffee mug.

A loud bark of laughter left Arizona's chest as she sat shaking her blonde head.

"_What_?" Callie drawled with a whine.

Arizona could only laugh harder and, helping Sofia scoop a piece of pancake onto her spoon, she simply chose to keep quiet, forcing her wife stew.

"What's so funny, Arizona?" Callie impatiently urged once again.

Wiping the syrup from Sofia's chubby cheeks, Arizona then gathered the toddler's plate and spoon before standing to cross the RV toward her wife and, setting the items in the sink, Arizona couldn't help but smirk as she turned toward her wife.

"What?"

Choosing her words, Arizona licked her lips. "I just didn't realize I was married to such a _nerd_."

Callie's mouth immediately fell open upon hearing Arizona's reply. "Just because I have an interest in history does not make me a _nerd_, Arizona," she indignantly replied.

"I'm pretty sure having your own conspiracy theory on the assassination of John F. Kennedy jumps right past interest, Calliope, landing directly on. . ._nerd_."

Callie shook her head at her wife's taunting before quickly placing her mug in the sink. "That's not funny, Arizona," she indignantly huffed before breezing past her wife to take her seat in the driver's seat of the RV. "Buckle Sofia into her car seat. We're leaving."

Arizona pressed her lips together, trying to stifle her amusement. "Callie. . ."

"I'm serious. Let's go."

"Callie, stop it. I was just kidding," Arizona contended, though she was completely unable to wipe the merriment - at her wife's expense - from her face.

Callie just shook her head, turning the key in the ignition.

Suddenly worried that her lighthearted teasing may have actually upset her wife, Arizona momentarily sobered and, after buckling Sofia into her seat, she stepped toward the front of the RV, grabbing Callie's hand from the steering wheel and pulling the pouting brunette from her seat.

"Get up. I'll drive," Arizona firmly stated, slipping past Callie to steal her seat. "If I drive, you'll have a much better view of the grassy knoll."

Arizona once again broke into a fit of giggles at her own remark.

"You are a terrible person, Arizona Robbins," Callie half-heartedly stated, throwing herself into the passenger's seat with a sigh. "A total bully."

Arizona could only smile, shaking her head at her wife's comically pouting face. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry," she finally relented. "We can go wherever you want."

Though Callie could tell her wife was only partly sorry, she couldn't deny how excited she was about what they were about to do. And, with her pout soon turning into a grin, she quickly began to speak. "We don't even have to stop," she excitedly promised, deciding to act on Arizona's agreement whether she truly meant it or not. "I just want to drive the motorcade route, and then we can leave."

Arizona offered her wife a bright smile, unsure of when she'd seen her so excited about something in the entire time they'd known each other. "We can stop if you want, Calliope," she honestly stated, never wanting to see that gorgeous smile fade from Callie's face ever again.

"Nope," Callie argued, quickly grabbing the map of downtown Dallas she had stashed in the glove compartment just for this exact occasion. "I don't need to stop. I just want to drive the route - see the school book depository. . ."

Callie paused, thankful for Arizona's offer to drive, but worried nonetheless. And, looking from the map toward her clearly still amused wife, she cautiously spoke. "You sure you're okay to drive? I can drive if. . ."

"I'll be fine, Calliope," Arizona earnestly insisted, reaching over to grasp Callie's hand. "Now where to?"

Callie searched the blonde's face for any sign of insecurity and, finding none, she smiled as she squeezed Arizona's hand. "Okay, it's Mockingbird Lane to Lemmon, then Lemmon to Turtle Creek. Turtle Creek to Cedar Springs. . ." she paused, pursing her lips in deep thought. "Then, Cedar Springs to Harwood. Harwood to Main - Main to Houston. Houston to Elm, and then under the Triple Underpass. . ."

Arizona stared at her wife in complete shock, her mouth agape. "Please tell me you did _not_ just recite that from memory."

Callie obviously blushed, certain what she'd just uttered would earn her even more of her wife's taunting and teasing later that day. "Umm. . ."

"Calliope Torres, look me in the eye right now and tell me _that_ wasn't nerdy."

Opening her mouth to argue, Callie's blush deepened. "Okay," she reluctantly admonished. "Maybe it was a _little_ nerdy - or _maybe_ \- I'm just incredibly intelligent," she tried to recover.

"Right. Of course that's what it is," Arizona teased as she began navigating the RV out of its parking spot and, then glancing toward her still self-conscious wife, she pressed her lips into a firm line in an attempt to keep her laughter inside. "So. . .tell me about this conspiracy theory of yours."

Callie rolled her eyes, sure she was never going to hear the end of this. "You don't have to _pretend_ to be interested," she replied, her eyes intent on looking only at the map in front of her.

"Seriously, Callie. I want to know," Arizona urged, trying to pull her wife from the funk she had fallen back into. "Tell me what you think happened."

Callie reluctantly looked up from the map toward the side of her wife's face and, suspiciously squinting her eyes when Arizona glanced toward her with a grin, Callie cleared her throat before deciding to speak. "Well, the Warren Commission said there was no conspiracy, but the United States House Select Committee on Assassinations concluded that there was a high probability that two gunmen fired at the President."

Arizona nodded, astonished not only by the fact that she didn't know her wife was such a history buff, but also by the sheer depth of Callie's knowledge of the historical facts that seemed to so effortlessly spill forth from her beautiful mouth. "Okay, so that's what those old guys say. But, what does Calliope Torres, JFK conspiracy theorist extraordinaire think?"

Callie couldn't help but laugh at her wife's description. "Well, I think the CIA may have been involved and that there definitely was a second gunman on the grassy knoll. . ."

* * *

Several hours later, Arizona sat relaxing on the sofa in the RV, the latest volume of the Journal of Pediatric Surgery held in her hands as Callie played on the floor with Sofia, silly children's favorites playing on Callie's iPod over the speakers of the RV.

"Okay, baby. Count with mommy," Callie happily encouraged, pointing to the blocks they were stacking. "Uno. . .dos. . .tres. . .cuatro. . ."

Before Callie could count past four, Sofia stood, slamming her hands into the tower of blocks, successfully knocking them to the floor.

"Ooo-kay. No Spanish. Got it," Callie replied with a laugh as she once again began to stack the fallen blocks.

Arizona smiled over her journal at the antics of both her girls, content to simultaneously read and watch.

The three continued their tasks in comfortable silence for a while longer, Arizona continuing to read as Callie and Sofia concentrated on rebuilding their block tower but, when the music changed from _Twinkle, Twinkle_ to _The Grand Old Duke of York,_ Sofia popped up, excitedly bouncing on her chubby little toddler legs.

"Dance, Mami!" Sofia happily cheered. "Dance!"

Kneeling in front of the little girl, Callie took Sofia's hands into her own, bouncing along with her as she animatedly sang along with the music.

_Oh, the grand old Duke of York,_

_He had ten thousand men;_

_He marched them up to the top of the hill,_

_And he marched them down again._

_And when they were up, they were up,_

_And when they were down, they were down,_

_And when they were only half way up,_

_They were neither up nor down._

Lowering Sofia to the floor, Callie leaned down to tickle the toddler, blowing loudly against her belly and, as the intoxicating sound of Sofia's giggles filled the room, her Mami continued to tickle her.

"More dance!" Sofia requested through her laughter. "Dance, mamma," she added, turning her attention from Callie and toddling toward Arizona who sat motionless on the couch.

Callie watched Arizona's face instantly fall at the child's simple request.

"Mamma's busy right now, big girl," Arizona answered, her tone short. "Maybe later. . ."

"Mamma, dance!"

"Arizona. Come on."

"No, Callie, I'm not sure that I can. . ."

Undeterred, Callie reached for her wife's hand. "Well, you'll never know if you don't try," she countered, moving closer to the blonde. "It's just us. No one else is around."

"I'm reading, Calliope," Arizona warned, shrugging away from Callie's hand. "This is a really interesting article on. . ."

Tugging the journal from her wife's grasp, Callie read, "Quality of life after gastric transposition for esophageal atresia. Hmm. . ._really_? Sounds so interesting and so. . ._fun_. Definitely more fun than playing with your daughter."

"Please, just drop it, Callie."

"Come on. Get up. Dance with us," Callie happily insisted, once again offering her hand to her wife. "I'm here if you need me."

Arizona bit her bottom lip, her resolve quickly vanishing as she moved her gaze between the two brunettes who affectionately - and hopefully - stared back at her. And, with a shake of her head, Arizona found herself completely powerless to tell them no.

"You two don't play fair," she finally conceded with a sigh before carefully standing from her seat. "But, if we're going to do this, we need better tunes."

Stepping toward the iPod dock, Arizona moved her thumb across the touch screen until she came to a playlist that instantly caught her attention. "What's this?" she asked, a mischievous grin covering her face.

"What?" Callie questioned, turning her attention from Sofia to her wife. And, suddenly realizing what her wife had most likely found, she quickly stepped around Sofia, brusquely tugging the iPod from Arizona's hand. "Give me that!"

"Oh, no!" Arizona laughed, holding the iPod away from her wife. "We are _definitely_ checking out _these_ songs."

"Haven't you had enough fun at my expense today?" Callie huffed, grabbing Arizona around the waist as she continued to reach for the device. "Give it to me!"

Arizona squealed when Callie spun her around, laughing uncontrollably when she sat her back on her feet. "Nope. There's no turning back now, Calliope! I need to hear what this _My Arizona _playlist has to offer."

"Oh my God. This is ridiculous," Callie pouted, releasing her wife. "They're just songs that make me think of you, _okay_? Though, after the crap you've put me through today, I definitely need to change them. Now, give it back."

Choosing one of the songs with a flick of her thumb, Arizona defiantly stood in front of the brooding brunette. "Calm down, Calliope. I think it's cute."

"Cute!" Callie scoffed with a sardonic laugh. "Well, I guess that's better than being a _nerd_."

_Do you want to be my love, my sight, my heart, and my eyes_

_My world, my pride, my stars in my skies_

_I am looking for a queen who's more than gorgeous on a movie screen_

_I am looking for the covergirl of dignified beauty magazine_

Both women started swaying and bouncing to the music as they looked down toward their daughter who was bobbing around to her own beat.

Assured that Sofia was alright, Callie turned her attention back to Arizona who still appeared slightly apprehensive. So, tightly grasping the blonde's hips for support, she gently encouraged her to move along with her.

_I want dimples, and simple symbols that she's sweet_

_Wrinkles her nose, expose what I mean_

_I am looking for a four-course meal that isn't based in base desire_

_I am looking for a lady that knows the soul is more than an appetizer_

_Just one more thing_

_Just one more thing_

Callie smiled as she watched Arizona's reaction to the lyrics, a dimpled smile lighting up her beautiful features.

"_So cheesy,_" the blonde laughed, her body moving more freely to the rhythm of the music.

_Do we fit in the pocket, can we fit sit back in the pocket_

_When the dreams and the drums start rocking_

_Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking_

_See I, I want a lady I can put stock in_

_I want a bass and backbeat to lock in_

_I want to know real love's not forgotten_

During the musical break, Callie spun Arizona around still firmly grasping her hips and, when the lyrics once again began, Arizona raised her arms in the air, swaying and moving them to the beat.

_I want a teacher who's eager to speak her mind_

_Delicate features, sweet with her tongue so kind_

_I am looking for the markers that say "permanent" so we can share_

_I am looking for a love that's still alive and well in rocking chairs_

_I want faithful, and stable, able_

_Beauty that moves me, improves my soul_

_I am looking for a shining light that likes to fight and persevere_

_I am looking for a lady that wants to make me part of her atmosphere_

_And oh, just one more thing_

_Oh, just one more thing_

_Do we fit in the pocket, can we fit sit back in the pocket_

_When the dreams and the drums start rocking_

_Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking_

_See I, I want a lady I can put stock in_

_I want a bass and backbeat to lock in_

_I want to know real love's not forgotten_

_All I need to know is_

_All I need to know is_

_All I need to know is_

By this point in the song, both women were dancing freely around the other, reminiscent of the first night they had danced together in Callie's apartment.

Leaning in toward her wife, Callie winked at her, a seductive smile gracing her lips.

Arizona returned the smile, unconsciously licking her lips as she watched Callie's breasts bounce with every move of her luscious body to the beat of the music.

_Are you clear on who you are_

_Do you love it?_

_When this world starts getting hard_

_We rise above it, rise above it_

Callie picked up Sofia, swaying with her, as she pulled Arizona in close, all three now dancing and smiling happily.

_In the pocket_

_Can we fix it back in the pocket_

_When the dreams and the drums start rocking_

_Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking_

_See I, I want a lady I can put stock in_

_I want a base and backbeat to lock in_

_I want to know real love's not forgotten_

_I said the pocket_

_Can we fit sit back in the pocket_

_When the dreams and the drums start rocking_

_Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking_

_See I, I want a lady I can put stock in_

_I want a base and backbeat to lock in_

_I want to know real love's not forgotten_

* * *

Reaching for the long-handled nozzle in the shower, Arizona pulled it toward her body, wetting her hair and skin with the warm water as she sat on a bench in the shower.

Hearing the bathroom door open, she smiled. "Sofia asleep?" she asked, reaching for her bottle of shampoo.

"Yep, all the dancing must have really tired her out," Callie replied.

Then hearing the door to the shower stall open, Arizona anxiously turned her head, the sight of her gloriously naked wife stepping into the shower to join her.

"What are you doing?" Arizona incredulously asked, a sheepish grin on her face.

"Well," Callie seductively drawled, stepping behind her and taking the shower spray from her hand. "This morning, you requested a repeat of last night, _so_. . .I thought I should be a good wife and take care of that request for you. A. S. A. P," she sensually teased, running her fingers through Arizona's now damp hair.

Placing the hose back in its holder, Callie then plucked the shampoo from Arizona's hand, pouring a liberal amount into her own palm in order to wash her wife's long blonde locks.

"Mmmm," Arizona moaned as Callie's strong fingers massaged her scalp.

Once again reaching for the hand shower, the brunette then took great care in rinsing all the shampoo from her wife's hair before moving to her front and painstakingly kneeling down between damp ivory thighs.

Spraying warm water over Arizona's front, Callie didn't hesitate, following several water droplets with her mouth, placing hot kisses against Arizona's neck and down her chest before coming to land directly over an already erect right nipple.

Taking the hardened bud into her mouth, Callie moaned when she felt Arizona's thighs tighten around her. Moving to flick her tongue around the blonde's other nipple, Callie squeezed her wife's hips, pulling her closer to her.

"Mmm, baby, that feels so good," Arizona urged.

Pleased with her wife's response, Callie continued her mouth's journey, dipping her tongue into Arizona's navel several times before continuing south. Pulling Arizona's right leg to rest on her shoulder, Callie pushed her thighs further apart, parting slick labia with gentle fingers.

Arizona's body momentarily flinched, still insecure with Callie's proximity to her amputated limb but, when those soulful brown eyes gazed up in her direction, she took a deep breath, desperately willing herself to urgently acquiesce to all the unconditional love and sincere devotion she could see reflected in those magical depths.

With a loving and tender smile, Callie patiently watched until her wife offered her a nearly imperceptible nod, that dark chocolate gaze momentarily lingering before lowering its attention to Arizona's heated core.

Threading her fingers through those luscious brunette locks in preparation for what she knew was about to come, Arizona's body immediately clenched when she felt the tip of a hot tongue flick against her swollen clit.

As the assault on her aroused bundle of nerves continued, Arizona's whole world seemed to spin as she rested her head against the wall of the shower, her hips involuntarily bucking against Callie's face.

"Oh God, Callie! Please. . .more. . .please. . ."

Callie smiled against her wife's core as she tightened her grip on her hips, pulling her more firmly against her tongue and mouth. Running her tongue up and down the inside of Arizona's wet labia, Callie then teased at her opening with the tip of her tongue before once again flicking it over an engorged clit, plump lips then beginning to suck.

As Callie sucked harder and harder, Arizona sensually locked her thighs around her wife's neck, unable to control the urgency in the writhing of her hips. And, grabbing the hair at the back of the Latina's head, Arizona tugged it less than gently with both hands.

"Right there. More, Callie. Right there," Arizona moaned as Callie moved her tongue a little to the left of her clit, exactly the way she knew she liked. Sensing that Arizona was already close, Callie refused to draw this out, diving in further, and savoring her wife's sex.

"Oh God! Mmmmm. . ." Arizona suddenly gasped and then moaned, shocked by the ferocity and quickness of the rapturous explosion she felt deep inside. And, holding Callie's head tight against her center as wave after wave of pleasure coursed through her, her body then began to tremble as it flooded with orgasmic bliss.

And, just as she expected it to fade, another orgasm started to build, Callie continuing to work her magic.

"Callie!" Arizona gasped, her body going completely rigid as a second orgasm quickly washed over her.

Unable to hold herself upright for a moment longer, Arizona soon slumped against the shower wall, her arms limply falling to her sides as her body completely relaxed with pure fulfillment.

Kissing her way back up her wife's body, Callie quickly captured Arizona's lips with her own in a gentle and loving kiss. And, pulling away after several long moments, Callie got lost in her wife's dazed cerulean eyes.

Smirking at her own handiwork, the brunette then quickly stood and, stepping from the shower, she grabbed a towel to wrap around her damp body before peeking her head back through the door of the stall. Grinning at her wife who still wore a stupefied look on her face, Callie bit her bottom lip, reveling in the fact that she was the one who had just rendered this stunning blonde completely speechless and more than a little aroused.

Finally catching her breath, Arizona only managed to roll her eyes at Callie's cocky grin.

"Go ahead and finish your shower, babe. I'll be waiting for you out here," Callie then suggestively stated.

And, then slowly turning around, Callie mentally patted herself on the back for her skilled achievement before seductively sauntering out the bathroom door.

* * *

**AN2: **The song in this chapter is called The Pocket by Andy Grammer. Thanks so much for reading, and I look forward to seeing what you think. Thanks again!


	9. Chapter 9

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Nine**_

* * *

The flight should have lasted less than an hour and thirty minutes, and the first hour passed by uneventfully, but. . .

At some point during the final minutes of the flight. . .

The engine noise changed. Distinctly.

They flew into heavy clouds, causing the small aircraft to shake.

Were they running out of gas?

The engine continued to lose power. Their altitude was slipping.

The plane then started to roll from side to side and, a second later, Arizona felt a powerful jolt like the plane had been hit from behind.

The aircraft started lurching and bumping in the air.

They continued to descend and, as Arizona peered to the left out the window, she could see the top of a thick canopy of trees. The next thing she knew, they were falling through the air as the plane went into a nosedive.

Falling head first with the seatbelt digging into her stomach, the engine suddenly roared back to life.

Too late.

The tail hit first. The plane's left wing clipped the tree tops, sending the damaged airliner into a tumble of death.

The airplane sheared off the tops of Hemlock, Red Cedar, Aspen, and Birch, leaving a half-mile-long trail of wreckage, luggage, and surgical notes.

The plane somersaulted, the windows shattered. . .

"Callie!"

Arizona jolted up in bed covered in sweat, her heart racing and her arms flailing, stopping only when the back of her right hand came into contact with the smoothness of her wife's face.

Instantly jerked from sleep by the sudden harsh impact to her cheek and nose, Callie quickly sat up, confusion flooding her mind and body as she surveyed her surroundings.

Taking in the sight of Arizona gasping and gulping for air as she clutched at her own chest, Callie's heart immediately began to race as she quickly moved to hold her wife.

But, before she managed to make contact with her trembling body, something inside Callie's head suddenly stopped her, telling her to proceed with caution in an effort to not startle her wife any further.

"Arizona," Callie tried to sooth as she knelt beside her on the bed. "I'm here," she continued, reaching a tentative hand to rest against Arizona's right cheek. "I'm here, sweetie. I'm right here. And, you're safe."

Arizona's body immediately flooded with the chemicals of fight or flight, her mind unable to concentrate on her surroundings.

Wide blue eyes remained unfocused.

She was in danger and she needed to take action.

And, unable to fight the overwhelming urge she felt to run away, she swatted Callie's hand away from her face, her right leg kicking furiously at her wife. Arizona felt completely detached from her surroundings - completely detached from her own body.

"Look at me, Arizona. You're safe, honey. I'm here. You're okay. I'm right here."

"No! No! No!" Arizona screamed violently jerking her body from side to side when Callie tried to pull her into her arms. "Get away from me!"

"Arizona!"

Callie raised her voice only slightly, making sure the blonde could hear her, but doing her best to remain calm. "I understand you're scared. And, that's okay. It's okay to be scared, but I'm here - I'm here to help."

Arizona's eyes darted back and forth, her chest aching and, suddenly ripping the covers from her shaking body, she hastily turned away from Callie's loving voice.

Moving right along with the terrified blonde, Callie reached her left hand out to gently stroke her wife's back, her right hand rubbing circles over Arizona's right thigh. "I'm here, Arizona. You're safe. It's okay to be scared, but you're safe, sweetie. I'm right here with you."

Callie repeated that mantra over and over into Arizona's ear, her heart breaking at the tormented vision of the beautiful woman who sat trembling at her side.

Arizona took deep staggering breaths, desperately trying to calm her racing heart. "Oh, God," she soon moaned, her body rocking forward as her shaking hands grasped at her middle. "I'm gonna be sick."

Reacting quickly, Callie briskly jumped from the bed, grabbing a small trash can from near the nightstand on Arizona's side of the bed. And, climbing back onto the mattress, Callie then settled herself behind her wife, legs outstretched on either side of the blonde as she assisted her in holding the waste basket.

As the bile rose in the back of her throat, Arizona lurched forward, the contents of her stomach emptying into the trash can over and over again as Callie continued to hold her tightly, smoothing the sweat damp hair back from her clammy face.

And, when the violent spasms of Arizona's stomach finally seemed to calm, Callie leaned forward to gently kiss her left temple. "You okay to sit here?" she softly asked. "I'll get you some water."

All Arizona could manage was a slight nod, her body completely drained.

Returning from the bathroom, Callie handed her a cup of cool water before running a tepid washcloth over her forehead and face, bringing it to rest against the back of Arizona's neck.

"That was a bad one," Callie cautiously commented.

Arizona closed her eyes, nodding her head in agreement. And, when she again opened her eyes, she caught Callie's concerned gaze for the first time since she'd jolted awake, those deep brown eyes worriedly staring back at her.

And, mistaking the concern she found there for nothing but pity and disappointment, Arizona's body once again filled with adrenaline as she quickly stood from the bed, stumbling to find her crutches.

"I. . .I have to go. I have to get out of here," she insisted, awkwardly hopping toward the door.

"What? Where are you going?" Callie asked, quickly standing from the bed. "Arizona, it's okay. Please - just stay."

Unphased by Callie's urgent pleas, Arizona adamantly shook her head and, without even a moment's pause she continued through the bedroom door, hastily making her way toward the exit of the RV.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Arizona heard the door of the vehicle open from where she sat in a lawn chair blindly staring up into the night sky.

"You're smoking?"

Arizona closed her eyes, ruefully shaking her head at the sound of her wife's voice. "I'm on _like_ cigarette number five from the _same_ pack I bought three months ago. All things considered, I think that's pretty damn good."

Cautiously staring at her wife as she took a seat on the steps leading back into the RV, Callie remained quiet, taking a long swallow of the beer she had grabbed from the refrigerator on her way to find her wife. Then handing the bottle to Arizona, she smiled when the blonde accepted it before flicking the cigarette in her other hand to the ground and extinguishing the flame with the toe of her shoe.

"I'm here for you, Arizona," Callie commented after several long moments of silence, unsure of what else to say.

"I know. . ."

"I'm not going to leave you just because you have a nightmare. . ."

"I know. . ."

"I'm not going anywhere even if you get scared. . .or get mad and try to push me away."

"I know," Arizona again admitted, her head shaking in reproach. "I. . .I just can't shut off my brain, Callie. And, I feel like I've ruined a wonderful few days. I feel so embarrassed and so, _so_ guilty."

"You haven't ruined anything, and you certainly have nothing to feel embarrassed or guilty about," Callie earnestly asserted. "Well, other than punching me in the face," she gently teased, dramatically rubbing her cheek in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Arizona huffed, rolling her eyes as she took a long drink from the cold bottle of Beck's Light.

"I think about the plane crash every day, Callie. I don't want to, but it's kind of hard not to think about it when I carry around a constant reminder. I think about that damn plane every time I look at myself," Arizona admitted, taking another drink from the bottle before handing it back to her wife.

Reaching out, Callie took the proffered beer and, setting it on the step, she grasped the sides of Arizona's chair, pulling it closer to her.

"Do you know what I see when I look at you?" Callie softly asked, pushing stray blonde hair behind her wife's ear.

"A hot mess?" Arizona quickly answered, instantly wishing she hadn't already put out her cigarette.

"No," Callie replied with a soft chuckle. "I see my wife. I see an intelligent, strong, beautiful woman whose presence lights up my day. I see a wonderful person who has suffered so much, but has only become more magnificent because of it."

"Callie. . ."

"I'm serious, Arizona. I love you, and I'm here for you," Callie sincerely replied. "But, you have to stop running from me," she earnestly continued. "We've come too far. Please don't put up those walls again. Don't shut me out. Please promise me that no matter what, from now on, you won't run. Please. . ."

"I'm sorry, Calliope. I'm trying. . ." Arizona stated with a sigh. "I'm just so used to being the strong one. I have a hard time leaning on others. You know that," she honestly continued. "But, I'll try not to run. I promise."

"Thank you," Callie nodded, leaning forward to briefly kiss her wife's chilled lips.

The instant Callie was close enough to her, Arizona immediately laced her arms around her wife's neck, holding on for dear life.

Callie smiled into the embrace, bringing Arizona along with her as she stood from her seat.

"Come on," Callie insisted when Arizona reluctantly pulled away. "You need to brush your teeth because you _kinda_ taste like vomit and an ashtray," she joked, chuckling at the comically horrified look on Arizona's face. "And my ass is freezing sitting on this step."

* * *

As exhausted and emotionally drained as she was, sleep adamantly eluded Callie's tired body and over-active mind. And, as she watched Arizona sleep, she shook her head, closing her eyes as a breathy sigh left her chest.

That nightmare had been a bad one.

One of the very worst.

At the start of their trip, the nightmares seemed to happen every couple nights - a vast improvement from the weeks immediately following the crash - but, they seemed to have decreased even further in number and intensity over the past two weeks.

Thinking back, Callie was sure Arizona hadn't fallen victim to the terrible visions in her mind for close to a week and a half – in fact, she recalled that the last one had occurred just a couple days before visiting Teddy – with her last panic attack occurring just four days into the trip.

Grabbing her phone from the nightstand, Callie noted that it was 5:15am, just two hours after finally settling Arizona back into their bed to rest. But, finally conceding to the fact that she - herself - was not going to be able to get any further sleep, Callie gently laid her lips against Arizona's temple before rolling off the bed.

Throwing a sweatshirt on over her pajama clad body, she quietly exited the bedroom, pulling the door shut with a gentle click.

Crossing the cabin of the vehicle, she decided against starting a pot of coffee, but instead grabbed a copy of _Us Weekly_ from near the passenger's seat and, settling onto the couch, Callie pulled a blanket from the back cushions to cover her lower body. Studying the magazine cover, she sighed, hopeful that reading mindless gossip about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes or Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart would lull her distressed mind to sleep.

Fifteen minutes and two articles about Kim Kardashian's wardrobe and Angelina's parenting techniques later, Callie finally gave up and, tossing the magazine to the floor, she worried her bottom lip between her teeth.

She just couldn't seem to rid her mind of the sheer terror written across her wife's face. . .

Arizona's panicked screams. . .

Callie was wholly unable to disregard them as they continued to echo through her troubled mind hours later.

Callie Torres wasn't easily scared. She considered herself pretty badass, but those screams. . .

The sheer terror present in Arizona's words. . .

The unparalleled fear filling her glazed blue eyes. . .

The absolute horror masking every feature of her beautiful face. . .

The stress evident in her rigid form as she relived falling through the sky and suffering for four very long days in the cold imposing forest. . .

All of that was enough to rock even the strongest person to their very soul.

Callie shook her head; sometimes this was just too much to handle.

Witnessing Arizona continuously fight her internal demons was horribly unbearable at times. She remained steadfast in her promise to support her wife, but this time – this nightmare had totally blindsided her. Though she had been on high alert for several months, this time, she was completely taken by surprise when her dazed mind was finally able to register what was happening.

And that was what frustrated her the most.

She had begun to let down her guard.

Arizona seemed to be doing so well.

They seemed to be making such amazing progress.

Callie internally scolded herself for becoming so complacent. She was a doctor - she knew the statistics. She knew that very few people were ever completely able to rid themselves of the nightmares and panic attacks that often followed such a traumatic experience.

So, why had she placed herself in such a situation? Why had she allowed herself even a moment's reprieve? Why had she been so sure that she could help?

"Damn it," Callie whispered into the quiet of the vehicle.

This had to be her fault. There was no way of getting around it.

She had to have done something to trigger this episode for her wife.

But, what?

Callie had no idea.

Closing her eyes, she thought back over the past week, desperately searching the recesses of her mind for some reason – for some catalyst that could have caused such a horrifying dream.

Callie jumped slightly when she felt the cushions beneath her shift and, quickly opening her eyes, she found the concerned blue eyes of her wife staring back at her.

"You okay?" Arizona tentatively asked.

Callie offered her wife a shaky smile. "I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" she guiltily replied, immediately sitting up straighter, purposely ignoring her wife's question.

Arizona shook her head in response. "What were you thinking about?" she softly questioned.

"Let's get you back to bed," Callie hastily urged, more concerned for her wife's comfort than the incessant thoughts racing through her tormented mind.

"Callie. . ."

"Come on," Callie stated as she swung her feet from behind her wife, standing quickly in an effort to ignore this situation and guide them both back to their bedroom.

"No, Calliope," Arizona adamantly retorted. "We're not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on with you."

"Nothing's going on," Callie immediately countered. "I just couldn't sleep."

"You're lying," Arizona reproachfully contended.

"It's nothing, Arizona. . ."

"If I don't get to run, neither do you."

"I just couldn't sleep! Okay?"

"I'm not fragile, Callie!" Arizona haughtily yelled, her own eyes going wide at the veracity of her response and, briefly pausing to glance around the room, she carefully consider her words. "Well, I know sometimes - lately - I may seem that way, but I'm getting better. I'm so much stronger that I was. And, I'm not going to break. So, please, Callie. Please don't start walking on eggshells around me again just because I had a nightmare. Not when we've come this far."

Callie slowly sat back down next to her wife, the irony of the situation not escaping her.

Hadn't she spoken similar words to Arizona just hours before?

And, searching saddened azure eyes, Callie sighed. "It's not my place. I shouldn't be feeling like this. I wasn't on the plane, Arizona. I didn't lose my leg."

Arizona momentarily flinched at the candor in her wife's words. "No. . ." she earnestly began. "But, you were affected. . ._greatly_. No one else involved – no one who wasn't a passenger on that flight - has suffered as much as you."

Callie sat silently, not wanting to project her own guilt and fears onto her already burdened wife.

"You're strong, Callie. I know that, but please. . ._please_ let me be here for you, again. We can be strong for each other."

A heavy silence hung over the room as Callie fought with herself over what she was about to say.

"I think we should go home."

"What?" Arizona incredulously asked.

"I think I messed up. I think we should go home."

"What are you talking about?"

Callie again stood from her seat, crossing the cabin of the RV toward the kitchen counter and, hesitantly turning to face her confused wife, she tightly grasped the countertop behind her. "I thought I could do this on my own. I thought this trip would be exactly what we needed to move past all of this. I thought this was what you, Sofia, and I needed to be happy. But, I think - I think I was wrong."

Arizona's face instantly fell.

She was _happy_.

She _was_ having a wonderful time spending every single day - uninterrupted by surgeries and pagers and PT appointments - with her wife and daughter.

Callie had gotten her to open up. She had made her feel sexy and wanted and _hot_ again. Callie had made passionate love to her for the first time in months.

How could she possibly think that any part of this trip was wrong?

"I think I should take you home so you can start seeing Dr. Wyatt again," Callie guiltily admitted, looking to the floor. "Being a doctor, I thought I would know what to do to help you through the nightmares and anxiety attacks, but as your wife. . ." Callie trailed off, shaking her head. "I thought Sofia and I would be _enough_, but I was so, _so_ stupid."

"Callie. . ."

"I'm sorry," the brunette replied as she wiped a single tear from her cheek. "I forced you to come with me. I interrupted your sessions with Dr. Wyatt. You were getting better, but I was selfish because, I wanted you better - I wanted my wife back. . ._faster_. I thought I. . ." Callie trailed off, lowering her head in disgust.

Reaching for her crutches, Arizona shakily stood before hopping toward her wife. Stepping in front of her, the blonde cleared her throat. "I haven't seen Dr. Wyatt in months, Callie," she softly admitted.

Callie immediately raised her eyes to regard the other woman. "What?"

Arizona nervously chewed at the inside of her cheek. "I only went to two sessions, but I just couldn't take it. I couldn't sit there and talk to her. I wasn't ready. So. . .I stopped going," she reluctantly stated.

"Arizona. . ."

"I know. I should have told you, but I didn't know what to say. That was such a terrible time, Callie. I didn't know what to do."

They stood staring at each other, uncomfortable silence once again filling the room.

"Don't be mad," Arizona shyly requested.

"I'm not mad. . .a little shocked. A little upset that you lied to me. . ."

"I'm sorry," Arizona stated. "But this. . ." She gestured between the two of them. "This progress we've made. . .we have done it together. This trip has been exactly what I needed. I'm gaining confidence and trying things I was afraid to. _Dancing_. Talking with you about my thoughts and fears. We're getting it on. . ."

Arizona chuckled, a sexy smile gracing her lips. "I'm getting better, Callie. All because of you."

A slight smile broke onto plump lips upon hearing Arizona's admission. "Really?" she shyly asked.

"Yes," Arizona quickly answered with a resolute nod. "And, I think when we get back - maybe then I'll be ready to talk to Dr. Wyatt. Maybe we can even see her together. But, for now, _this_ is exactly what I - what _we_ needed. Please don't ever doubt that."

Callie's heart instantly swelled with love and pride and, leaning forward, she instantly captured her wife's lips in a searing kiss. And, feeling Arizona briefly stumble at the ferocity of the kiss, the brunette immediately grasped her hips, pulling her into her body.

"I love you so much, Arizona," Callie whispered as she pulled back from her wife's bruised lips.

"I love you, too, babe," Arizona responded, nuzzling her nose against that of her wife. "More than anything," she continued and, quickly pecking her wife's full lips once again, Arizona then turned, moving back toward the bedroom. "Let's go," she insisted as she turned back toward Callie. "We can sleep a little longer before Sofia wakes up. Or. . . if we're lucky, and Sofia cooperates, if you'd like, maybe we could. . ."

Arizona trailed off, a suggestive grin on her face.

"Oh, I would definitely like. . ."

* * *

"Yes, mom," Arizona said from the passenger's seat, her phone resting between her shoulder and ear as she struggled with the GPS in her hands. "We're leaving St. Louis right now."

"_We're so happy your coming, Arizona. I found Sofia the cutest little dress for Thanksgiving dinner_."

"Mom. . ."

"_It has a turkey embroidered on the front. With her dark hair and skin - she's going to look so adorable_."

"Mom. . ."

"_Your father says Callie has to make the stuffing. Apparently, mine is too dry_."

"Mom!" Arizona raised her voice, trying to halt her mother's ramblings and, placing the GPS back on the dash, she looked toward Callie who continued to drive, a knowing smirk on her face.

"_When will you be here? I have the guest room ready for you and Callie. Or. . .if you have trouble making it up the stairs. . ._"

"Mom, I'm just going to stop you right there," Arizona interrupted, trying to hold back her irritation. "I can walk up stairs, mother. You don't have to make any special accommodations for me. I'm not handicapped."

Callie's gaze immediately darted from the road toward her wife.

Relieved when she saw more amused irritation than sadness or fear, she sent her wife a sympathetic smile.

"_That's not what I mean, Arizona. I just want you to be comfortable_."

Quickly changing the subject, Arizona shook her head. "Like I was trying to say - we're leaving St. Louis right now. We plan on spending a couple days in Chicago, then a couple days in Niagara Falls. We should be in Rhode Island by the 17th or 18th."

"_That's more than a week away, Arizona,_" Barbara said, displeased.

"Thanksgiving isn't until the 22nd. . ." Arizona countered. ". . .and if you and dad wouldn't have moved further away because he decided to come out of retirement to teach at the Naval War College, we would have been there sooner."

"_Arizona_. . ."

"I'm just saying, mom. We'll be there way before Thanksgiving."

There was nothing but silence from the other end of the line before Arizona finally heard her mother speak.

"_Okay, sweetheart,_" Barbara conceded. "_Give Callie and Sofia our love_."

"I will."

"_Love you, Arizona_."

"Love you, too."

Arizona flicked her thumb across the screen of her phone, ending her call. And, blowing out a flustered breath, she leaned her head back against the seat, her eyes closed.

"Maybe we should spend Thanksgiving with _your_ parents instead," Arizona suggested.

"Ha!" Callie sarcastically spat. "Yeah right," she then added with a chuckle.

"She's going to drive me insane."

Callie compassionately eyed her wife. "She's just concerned, sweetie. She loves you. So many people love you and want the best for you."

"Oh yeah? Who?"

"Hmm, let me think," Callie played, her lips pursing in mock consideration. "Well, there was that hot brunette nurse in San Antonio. Remember her? "

* * *

**AN: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and review!


	10. Chapter 10

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Ten**_

* * *

"You sure you don't want to come?"

Arizona nodded her head, her eyes carefully watching as Callie packed Sofia's bag for their day out. "Yeah. . .if you don't mind. I think I'll just stay here and catch up on some emails. Maybe check in with Karev," she rapidly listed, grabbing Sofia's cup from the counter and handing it to her wife.

Looking up from the bag, Callie suspiciously searched her wife's face. "You okay?" she carefully.

Arizona smiled at her wife's concern. "Yes, Calliope. I'm fine," she tried to assure. "If you take Sofia to Airtastic today, I promise all three of us will go to the Aquarium and the Children's Museum tomorrow."

Callie continued to study her wife, searching for any hint of why she had decided to stay in for the day. "And, you're _sure_ you're okay?"

Stepping up in front of her wife, Arizona gently pressed her lips to the corner of Callie's mouth. "I'm sure," she softly replied.

With a smile, Callie then gathered Sofia and her bag, finally seeming to concede. "Okay," she stated but, moving toward the door, she turned back to her wife. "You're sure?"

"Callie. . ." Arizona huffed, irritation beginning to creep into her voice.

Turning her attention to Sofia, Callie conspiratorially spoke to the child. "I don't know, baby girl. You think mama's being weird?" She asked, smiling when Sofia unwittingly nodded her head. "Yeah? Me, too."

"I'm not being weird," Arizona countered with a roll of her eyes. "There's nothing wrong with me staying in for the day."

Callie wasn't completely convinced but, leaning forward, she acquiesced, gently kissing her wife goodbye. Pulling away, she smiled. "We'll be back in a few hours."

"Okay," Arizona nodded. "I'll see you when you get back."

Exiting the RV, Callie walked the short distance toward the rental car they had rented for their time in Chicago and, just when Arizona thought her wife was going to slip into the driver's seat to start the car, she sighed when she saw Callie Turn back toward her, instead.

"You're sure you're okay?"

"Callie!"

"Okay, okay," the brunette replied, playfully winking at her wife. "Love you."

* * *

Several hours later, a thump against the RV door pulled Arizona's attention away from the boiling pot on the kitchen stove.

"Just a second," she called as she wiped her hands on a kitchen towel before crossing the vehicle. And, peeking out the window, a smile graced her face at the sight before her.

Quickly opening it, Arizona softly chuckled. "What's all this?"

Callie stood at the bottom of the steps, a very asleep Sofia in one arm, her chubby toddler arms haphazardly slung here and there, several shopping bags, her purse, and Sofia's bag hanging from Callie's other arm.

"Can you take a couple bags?" Callie urgently asked, shifting her weight from one foot to the other to keep from dropping her heavy load.

"Oh, yeah, sorry," Arizona answered as she quickly grabbed some shopping bags from her wife's grasp.

"Sofia needed diapers and those apple cinnamon puffs she likes," Callie stated as she ascended the stairs. "So, then I just decided to get some stuff to make for. . ."

Callie paused, looking around the RV. "Arizona?" she questioned, a smile curling at her lips. "What - what's all this?"

Depositing the shopping bags onto the table, Arizona shyly turned back toward her wife.

"Well, I just - I wanted to show you how much I appreciate everything you've done lately. This trip has been _wonderful_, and. . .I just wanted to thank you," Arizona sheepishly replied before stepping back toward her wife to take the rest of the bags. "It's nothing extravagant. Just grilled chicken, some brown rice, and a garden salad."

Callie's eyes immediately began to flit around the cabin of the RV, widening as they took in everything Arizona had done.

Two taper candles stood flickering in the center of the dining table along with several other smaller candles that were scattered along the countertop. The interior lights of the RV were dimmed as soft music from Callie's _My Arizona_ playlist softly played in the background.

"You're pretty fond of that playlist, aren't you?" Callie teased with a chuckle.

Arizona offered her wife a sheepish shrug. "Eh. . .it's not so bad," she coyly played, stepping up in front of her slightly stunned wife. "I, umm - I thought we could put Sofia to bed and then enjoy a nice quiet dinner. Together," she softly explained. "The putting Sofia to bed part seems to already be taken care of, though."

Glancing down at the exhausted child she still held in her arms, Callie smiled. "Yeah. She seriously played her little ass off today."

Arizona reached forward, gently smoothing the dark hair from Sofia's face, a cherubic cheek resting against Callie's shoulder and, laying a tender kiss against her forehead, she smiled. "Why don't you go put her down. I'll put away the groceries, and then we can eat."

Callie smiled. "Sounds good," she replied. "I'll be right back."

* * *

"Mmm, Arizona," Callie moaned as the blonde harshly pushed her up against their bedroom door.

Dinner had been excellent and was followed by Arizona laughing hysterically as Callie retold the story of Sofia's antics in the various bounce houses she had played in earlier that day. Sharing a bottle of Callie's favorite Pinot Noir, their conversation had flowed easily as they flirted shamelessly.

Callie had been completely unable to deny the advances of her wife as she pulled her from her seat and pushed her backward into their bedroom just moments before. She wasn't sure if it was the wine they had consumed, or perhaps the renewed sense of self-confidence Arizona had recently discovered, but she was certain that Arizona taking charge – Arizona pushing her up against their bedroom door as she guided their love making – felt frickin' amazing.

"God, I need you," Arizona panted as she tugged Callie's shirt over her head. "You're so damn hot."

Callie leaned forward to capture Arizona's lips as the blonde's hands snaked behind her to remove the deep purple bra she was wearing.

Freeing heavy breasts from their confinement, Arizona quickly devoured Callie's right nipple, pleasuring it with her tongue and lips as she pinched and rolled the other hardened bud between her thumb and forefinger.

"Oh, God," Callie groaned, throwing her head back against the door. "Mmm...so good."

Arizona continued her descent down Callie's body, dipping her tongue into her navel before teasing the skin above the waistband of her jeans with the insistent tip of her tongue. Then pulling the button of Callie's jeans through the buttonhole, Arizona started to kneel in front of her wife in order to continue her ministrations, but halted when she suddenly began to lose her balance.

"Shit," Arizona hissed, grabbing Callie's hips to keep from toppling to the floor. "Damn it."

As her wife's curses filtered into her arousal dazed mind, Callie's eyes quickly snapped open, immediately jerking her back to reality from the abyss of pleasure and excitement she had quickly tumbled into. Looking down toward her wife whose forehead now rested against the waistband of her jeans, Callie bit her bottom lip, unsure of how to proceed.

But, making a quick decision, Callie placed a hand under each of the blonde's arms, pulling her back up into standing from the awkward position she had assumed. And, when Arizona refused to meet her gaze, Callie gently grabbed her chin, forcing her to look into her eyes. "We're just going to try something different," Callie simply stated, refusing to allow _this_ to overwhelm Arizona's psyche.

"Callie. . ."

"I _said_ \- we're just going to try something different," Callie repeated more firmly as she pressed her body forward, taking Arizona's lips into a passionate kiss.

Grabbing at the hem of the blonde's t-shirt to brusquely pull it over her head, Callie then palmed Arizona's bra clad breasts, pleased when she felt her wife's body begin to once again relax. Then stepping forward, she gently urged Arizona backward toward the bed, but gasped in surprise when the blonde unexpectedly turned their bodies to shove her onto the bed.

Reclining on her elbows, Callie scooted back toward the center of the bed, seductively smirking as she watched her wife remove her own navy blue satin bra. Hungrily licking her lips, Callie allowed her eyes to scan from her wife's erect nipples down toward the yoga pants that covered her hips before quickly moving back up to her darkened blue eyes.

"Like what you see?" Arizona sexily asked as she stalked toward her wife, crawling onto the bed in search of her prey.

"Definitely," was all Callie could reply before Arizona captured her lips with her own, pulling both of their bodies down onto the bed to rest on their sides, facing each other.

Leaning up onto her left elbow, Callie pushed Arizona onto her back, momentarily hovering over her before sticking out the tip of her tongue to trace her wife's lips. Chuckling when Arizona nipped at it with her teeth, Callie then pressed her lips firmly to her wife's, her tongue invading the blonde's mouth as her right hand massaged a bare breast.

Arizona soon grasped Callie's wandering hand and, with a sudden burst of confidence, she urgently guided it past the waistband of her pants and toward the wet heat that radiated from her center.

Knowing exactly what Arizona needed, but wanting her to remain in control, Callie allowed her hand to be led, biting her bottom lip at the sound of the gasp that fell from Arizona's lips when Callie's index finger found her erect clit through the barrier of her pants and panties.

Hopping up onto her knees at the side of her wife, Callie continued to kiss Arizona as her fingers applied steady pressure to her pulsing bundle of nerves and, then moving her hand to her wife's hip, she sat back onto her knees as she hooked both hands into the elastic band of Arizona's black yoga pants, pulling them down her legs.

Once discarded, Callie's fingers slipped into the waistband and gently tugged the navy blue panties down Arizona's thighs, momentarily stopping when the elastic caught on the metal of the prosthetic knee joint. But, quickly recovering, Callie untangled the satin material as she proceeded to remove them the rest of the way down her wife's legs.

Kneeling with her thighs slightly parted, Callie gazed hungrily upon Arizona's naked form, feeling a growing dampness between her own legs. Neither spoke, nor did they move for several seconds - Callie allowing Arizona to take the lead and Arizona wondering just what her wife would do next.

Sitting up, Arizona finally made up her mind, immediately grasping her wife's sides, drawing her breasts closer to her face. Then firmly grasping the right one, Arizona teased the erect nipple with her tongue before moving to pay the same attention to it's mate. And, getting lost in the moaned encouragements and gasped pleadings that spilled from Callie's beautiful mouth, Arizona then moved downward, running her left palm over Callie's bare stomach before pulling down the zipper of her wife's jeans. Then snaking her hand into the front of Callie's pants, Arizona ran her middle finger through moist folds.

Moaning at the contact, Callie threw her head back on her shoulder, spreading her legs further as her wife continued to stroke her aching clit.

Continuing to allow her wife all of the control, Callie immediately obeyed when Arizona urged her from her elbows to lie down on her back, groaning when the blonde removed her hand from between her legs.

Pulling dark jeans along with the Latina's deep purple panties down her long tanned legs, Arizona attempted to position herself between her wife's thighs, groaning in frustration when the weight of her prosthesis prevented her from moving into the position she desired.

"My God - this is ridiculous," Arizona muttered as she quickly sat back against the head of the bed.

Callie recognized Arizona's need to command this encounter and be dominant in this situation, so she patiently leaned back onto her elbows, allowing her wife a moment to gather herself and process her next move. Remaining quiet, she cautiously watched as Arizona obstinately attempted to regain her composure.

After a few moments, Callie smiled slightly when Arizona leaned forward, a decision seemingly made.

Pulling off her prosthesis, Arizona then guided it to the floor before removing the sleeve from her residual limb. And, taking a deep breath to settle her mind, Arizona turned back toward her wife. "Okay," she tentatively breathed out. "Where were we?"

Reaching out her arms, Callie beckoned Arizona toward her, smiling seductively when the blonde straddled her left thigh.

Pressing forward, Arizona rested her body firmly onto that of her wife, gasping when her already aroused nipples brushed against Callie's. Then sucking a plump bottom lip between her own, Arizona pressed up on her arms and right knee as she continued to assault Callie's full lips.

Pulling back, Arizona gazed down the curvy tanned body, wanting to touch her more intimately – wanting to bring wave after wave of pleasure to her gorgeous wife.

Arizona couldn't remember the last time she felt such a longing to indulge in her deepest desires and, quickly leaning forward supporting her body with her elbows and forearms, she eagerly suckled and teased her wife's breasts.

"Oh, God," Callie moaned at her wife's fervor, arching her back, seeking the friction she desperately needed.

Pulling Arizona up to kiss her waiting lips, Callie reached down to wrap her arms tightly around her wife, her fingers cupping her firm ass, as the blonde lowered her left thigh to press against the Latina's core.

Callie flinched slightly at this new sensation, her throbbing clit aching for more friction, though her mind raced. This was something they had done so many times before - Callie found her wife the very hottest when she would greedily give in to her own desires, shamelessly riding her thigh in the heat of passion, and she knew that Arizona loved it when she did the same.

But, bucking her hips toward her wife's residual limb in an attempt to rid her brain of its untimely thoughts, she just couldn't go on, ripping her lips from her wife's mouth.

"Stop. . .wait. . .please," Callie stammered, a blush creeping across her face and chest.

Pushing up onto her hands and right knee, Arizona stared down into her wife's clearly conflicted eyes.

"What wrong?" Arizona breathlessly asked, the concern evident in her voice.

Callie only shook her head as she closed her eyes, too embarrassed and ashamed to speak.

"Calliope. . ." Arizona urged.

Slowly opening her eyes, Callie tried mightily to swallow the lump that had formed in her throat. Finally finding her voice, she purposely averted Arizona's gaze.

"I. . .I'm sorry. I. . ."

Moving to settle herself at her wife's side, Arizona pulled Callie's face toward her. "Look at me, Calliope," she forcefully demanded. "Look at me _right now_."

When brown eyes tentatively reached her blue ones, Arizona was surprised to see tears welling in the magical chocolate orbs. "What's wrong?" she gently asked, pushing brunette locks away from Callie's face. "You can tell me."

Knowing she needed to be completely honest with her wife, Callie let out a staggered breath. "I'm sorry. I just - I got a little uncomfortable. I. . ."

Arizona searched her wife's face, confused by her statement. "What are you talking about?"

Callie shook her head, completely frustrated with herself. "You - your leg. When you touched me with it. It felt. . ._good_."

"Well, isn't it supposed to feel _good_?" Arizona questioned with a smirk, still wholly perplexed by her wife's reaction.

"Well, yeah. But, it's your _leg_, Arizona! And, I know we've done _that_ before. A thousand times, but now. . ."

Callie trailed off, mentally steeling herself for what she was about to say. "It just doesn't seem right," she hesitantly continued. "I shouldn't be allowed to feel _pleasure_ from something that has caused you so much _pain_."

"Callie. . ."

"I - I'm so sorry."

"Callie, stop. Right now. I need you to stop," Arizona insistently chided. "Please just stop."

"Arizona. . ."

"Shhh," Arizona softly replied, pressing her fingers to her wife's lips. "You have to accept this, Callie. . .just as much as I do. This is who I am now. This is who I'm going to be for the rest of my life – for the rest of _our_ life together. Nothing is going to change this," she tried to rationalize, her hands gesturing toward her residual limb. "So, if _that_ happens again, then it is what it is, Calliope. We can't change things now."

Callie found herself completely unsure of who the blonde was trying to convince. "But, I. . ."

"No more talking. We will discuss this some other time," Arizona whispered as she adamantly pushed through, leaning forward to capture her wife's lips. "Because right now, I really, _really_ want you."

Hesitantly rolling onto her side to face the blonde, Callie nuzzled her nose against Arizona's neck before pulling back to search her face. And, finding only confidence, certainty, and love in those steadfast cerulean eyes, Callie smirked.

"Then take me. Please."

As Arizona's nipples caressed Callie's breasts, they pressed their bodies more firmly together until they seemed to become one. In that moment, their souls seemed to intertwine, electricity jolting between them as they hungrily kissed.

Moving down Callie's body, Arizona explored every inch of her tanned skin with her tongue and mouth. Reaching the trimmed patch of dark curls, Arizona looked up toward her wife whose mouth hung open in anticipation. Pulling Callie's legs over her shoulders, Arizona wrapped her arms around her thighs, pulling her core closer to her face. Dipping her tongue to flick at her wife's erect bundle of nerves, Arizona smirked when Callie bucked her hips.

"Oh, God! Yes!" Callie cried out when she felt Arizona's warm lips envelop her throbbing member.

Continuing to lick and suck just as she knew Callie needed, Arizona intermittently dipped her tongue into her wife's center, perfectly content to continue her assault on her wife's core.

Needing her wife closer to her - needing to look into her eyes, Callie soon tugged at blonde hair, pulling her upward.

"Up here," she huskily breathed.

Arizona obeyed, moving up her wife's body, both once again lying on their sides.

Now able to stare into her gorgeous wife's clearly aroused eyes, Callie took Arizona's hand into her own, guiding it to the place her mouth had just vacated. And, gasping when the blonde immediately pushed two fingers into her wet center, Callie held her wife's gaze as she in turn did the same.

Arizona's eyes immediately slammed shut at the delicious sensation her wife was creating inside her.

"Open your eyes, Arizona," Callie requested. "I need to watch you."

Arizona's eyes slowly opened, her mouth falling open when Callie's fingers curled, skillfully stroking her to perfection.

"Yes, Callie! Oh, God. More."

Their legs intertwined into the perfect position for their mutual pleasure, and Callie gasped when Arizona's thumb brushed against her clit before applying a steady pressure to her bundle of nerves.

"Arizona. . .I'm. . .oh, baby. . .I'm c. . ."

Callie's words were cut off when her mouth opened in a silent scream, her internal muscles clenching and sending her into a wild orgasm that consumed her entire being.

Arizona's center pulsed as she witnessed the unadulterated pleasure flash across Callie's wide eyes, deft fingers somehow managing to continue sliding in and out of her.

The blonde's body soon arched into her wife when Callie simultaneously curled her fingers, her thumb firmly circling her aching clit and sending her toppling over the edge, her throbbing core tugging on her wife's fingers.

"Oh. . . oh. . .oh my God!"

Lying face to face, their noses touching, both women desperately tried to calm their ragged breathing, one trembling body quaking and jerking against the other.

Several long minutes later, Arizona leaned in, gently kissing her utterly sated wife. Gently running her tongue along the full lips, Arizona smiled when she felt her wife shiver in response.

"Mmmm. . ._amazing_."

* * *

Sometime later, after slipping into their pajamas, Callie rested her head on Arizona's shoulder as the blonde gently ran her fingers through thick brunette locks.

"It's never going to be the same, is it?" Arizona haltingly questioned after several long moments of silence.

Callie initially hesitated before leaning up on her elbow to look down at her wife.

Momentarily surprised by the insecurity she now found on Arizona's face - a direct contrast to the confidence and certainty the blonde had displayed less than an hour before - Callie gently shook her head.

"No, sweetie. It's never going to be the same."

Arizona sighed at that response, ruefully shaking her head.

"_But_, that's not necessarily a bad thing," the Latina quickly continued.

Arizona searched the soulful eyes of the woman she loved.

"Just because it's not the _same_, doesn't mean it's not _outstanding_."

Callie pecked her wife's lips. "Amazing. . ." she smirked. "Breathtaking. . ." Callie added, chuckling against her wife's face.

"Well don't stop _there_," Arizona teased, her mood lightening. "By all means, keep going."

"Magnificent. . ."

_Kiss._

"_Totally_ _awesome_."


	11. Chapter 11

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Eleven**_

* * *

"Hey," Callie muttered as she entered Sofia's bedroom, blinking her eyes in an attempt to filter out the early morning sunlight that streamed through the window. "You're already up?"

Arizona smiled as she finished double knotting the toddler's shoes. "Yep, Sofia is _super_ excited about the children's museum."

Callie grinned at her wife. "Oh, she is, is she?"

Arizona kissed Sofia's chubby cheek before pulling her bangs back with a pink and white bow that matched her shirt to perfection. "I mean look at her," Arizona beamed. "Can't you tell?"

Callie chuckled softly as Arizona continued to shower their little girl with loving attention. "I can tell that _you_ are super excited. Sofia, though? Not so much," Callie jokingly replied as she watched their daughter stubbornly attempt to untie the laces of her freshly tied shoes.

Arizona playfully rolled her eyes at her wife's jovial remark. "Well, she may not look excited right _now_, but she will definitely be when we get there," Arizona happily countered.

Callie couldn't help but return her wife's excited demeanor, a large smile tugging at her face.

"I did some research yesterday while you were out," Arizona then stated, her eyes sparkling with every passing word. "I think we should _definitely_ go to the Shedd Aquarium and the Kohl Children's Museum. The museum has a Wizard of Oz exhibit and Water Works, and a Habitat Park. Oh! And, there's a kid sized grocery store where she can run the cash register or stock the shelves. She can do her own shopping and even bake bread in the bakery. You know how much she likes shopping, Callie."

Callie curiously searched her wife's face as she listened to her uninterrupted ramblings. "Arizona. . ."

". . .and there's a veterinarian's office. She can wear a little lab coat and take care of stuffed kittens and puppies. _And_, there's a hands on house where she can help build a kid sized home. . ."

"Arizona. . ."

". . .and an exhibit where she can explore the concepts behind renewable energy using the wind and the sun. She can discover how much power it takes to run a TV, or a refrigerator, or a toaster. . ."

"She's a year and a half. . ."

"It's never too early to teach her to be a good steward of the environment, Calliope."

At that, it was Callie's turn to roll her own eyes. "Arizona. . ." she once again tried, slightly raising her voice in an attempt to get her wife's attention.

"What?"

Callie paused, unsure if she should say anything that might put a damper on her wife's seemingly cheerful mood but, fearful that this over-enthusiasm was a misguided attempt at masking some other emotion that was threatening to take over her mind, Callie decided she had to take the chance.

"What's going on?" she asked simply. "You okay?"

"What do you mean, _what's going on_?" Arizona dismissively asked.

"I mean what's this all about? What are you thinking?" Callie continued. "Is this about. . ._last nigh_t?"

"What about last night?" Arizona immediately huffed, irritation entering her tone.

"Arizona, you know what I'm talking about," Callie deliberately replied.

Arizona hastily shook her head, refusing to let anything suppress her happiness. "I'm fine, Calliope," she firmly stated as she settled Sofia onto the floor. And, making sure the toddler was steady on her feet, she then stepped toward her wife. "Can I not just be excited to spend the day with my family?"

Callie immediately recoiled when she saw the anger and frustration beginning to commence in Arizona's suddenly hardened eyes. And, deciding to allow her wife to continue on with what she was sure was some sort of emotional diversion – a façade of conflicted feelings – she hesitantly relented.

For now.

"Okay," Callie surrendered, holding up her hands in defeat. "I'll go get ready."

* * *

"She's beautiful."

Arizona heard a woman to her right say as she contentedly watched Sofia attempt to construct what looked like a pretend Panini sandwich at the play Potbelly Café exhibit of the museum. And, turning her attention toward the red haired woman, Arizona smiled. "Thank you," she replied before returning her attention back to Sofia who was wearing an adorable red apron over her outfit.

"Where'd she get such dark hair?" the woman asked, clearly observing the profound differences in Arizona and Sofia's features.

But, before Arizona could open her mouth to respond, a stunning Latina – the larger version of the tiny human in question – stepped over the bench to take a seat next to her wife.

"Sorry," Callie stated as she flopped down next to the blonde. "That was Bailey. She wanted to know when the He. . ."

Callie sheepishly paused, quickly remembering the fact that she was surrounded by not only her own, but several other tiny humans _and_ their adoring parents. And, swiftly recovering, she lowered her voice. "She wanted to know when the H – E – L – L we're coming back. Apparently, the new attendings are still wreaking havoc on the lounge, and she needs back up."

Arizona chuckled softly at the thought of Miranda Bailey actually needing _anyone's_ help with _anything_ and, completely forgetting the question of the stranger who silently sat next to her, she then asked, "When _are_ we going back?"

Callie tilted her head to the side in consideration before questioningly shrugging her shoulders. "Well, we've been gone almost four weeks. I asked Owen for at least a month – maybe two. I thought we could decide our next move once we get to your parents' house in a few days," Callie honestly replied.

Callie sat waiting for a response but, when Arizona didn't make any effort to reply, she nervously began to ramble. "But, if you're ready to go back now. . .we can. We can go back to Seattle whenever you want. If you want to leave. . ."

"Oh, you're from Seattle?" the disregarded redhead asked, apparently unwilling to be overlooked.

Callie and Arizona's heads both snapped toward the sound of the woman's voice.

"Umm. . .yes?" Callie curiously replied, surprised by the interruption and completely unaware of the very brief conversation this person had shared with her wife just moments before.

"My brother lives in Burien."

"And you are?" Callie skeptically asked, looking between this woman and her wife, slightly perturbed by the stranger's obvious eavesdropping.

"My name is Bethany, and that," she said, pointing to the little boy who had just swiped the tomato and onions from Sofia's faux Panini, "is my son Simon. I was just talking to your friend about how beautiful her little girl is, but we hadn't actually introduced ourselves."

Callie smirked, exchanging an awkward glance with her wife.

"Oh, sorry. . ." Arizona began, briefly laughing at the expression on her wife's face before quickly recovering. "I'm Arizona and this is my _wife,_ Callie. And, to answer your question, our daughter Sofia clearly gets her dark hair from her mami."

Bethany's eyes immediately went wide and, glancing between the women, she then looked toward Sofia before once again turning her attention back to the clearly amused couple.

"She's a very pretty little girl," Bethany finally replied. "You should. . ."

But, before she could finish her statement, all three women's attention was quickly diverted toward the deli where their children were playing when they heard Simon begin to cry.

"No!" Sofia scolded him. "Share!" she instructed. "Share toys!"

Callie immediately jumped to her feet, but stopped when she felt Arizona's hand on her arm. "I'll get her," the blonde insisted as she stood to save the blue eyed boy from Sofia's disciplining lecture.

Bethany quickly grabbed Simon who sat softly whimpering, his freckled cheeks wet with tears. "It's okay, baby," she soothed. "It's time for us to go, anyway. It was nice meeting you," Bethany said as she wiped Simon's nose with a tissue. "Bye bye, Sofia," she called before grabbing her stroller and walking away.

Callie and Arizona exchanged an amused glance before Arizona leaned down to pick up the miniature Latina.

"You shouldn't yell at your friends, baby girl," Callie instructed as she pulled down the leg of Sofia's pants from where it had ridden up when Arizona scooped the toddler into her arms.

Arizona's mouth fell open, her brow furrowing in disagreement. "She was right, Callie. He needed to share."

"She made that poor baby cry, Arizona."

"Well, then maybe he shouldn't have stolen her cold cuts."

* * *

"Sofia! No!" Callie shouted as she chased after the toddler, unfortunately not quick enough to prevent her from brusquely smacking her palms against the glass of the giant aquarium.

"Big fishy! Mami. . .big fishy!" Sofia excitedly screamed as her hands once again banged against the glass.

Quickly taking the toddler into her arms, Callie grabbed one of her flailing hands, grasping it within her own. Holding it firmly, she gently pecked at a chubby fist. "You have to be careful, baby. No hitting the glass, okay?"

"Oh, Callie. . ." Arizona admonished from where she had watched the scene unfold. "She's fine. This thing holds like 5,000,000 gallons of water. If it can't stand up to the abuse of a twenty-two pound child, then they may need to re-evaluate their infrastructure."

Callie's face instantly scrunched at her wife's response. "Infrastructure? Arizona? Really?" she bewilderedly inquired.

"What?" Arizona huffed. "She's just having fun."

Callie nodded in agreement, though she didn't complete acquiesce. "I'm all for having fun, but she can't just run all over the place like a crazy person. We can't just excuse her for being destructive. What kind of message does that send?" she earnestly questioned, the volume of her voice rising with every word.

"She's a toddler, Callie," Arizona chided without hesitation before taking Sofia from her wife. "She's learning to be independent. When did you become so authoritarian, anyway?"

Callie shook her head in complete frustration and utter confusion because, right now, she really just wanted to scream. She didn't consider herself authoritarian in any way shape or form but, more importantly, when exactly had Arizona become so complacent to just let Sofia do whatever she wanted?

"It's not like I'm trying to break her spirit, Arizona," Callie hastily replied, looking around to see if their argument was being observed. "I think we have to have at least a few firm rules. No hitting, no running in the street, no banging on glass. . ."

"Well, I think we need to choose our battles, Calliope," Arizona replied, turning away from the confused brunette without further reply.

"Come on, baby," Arizona then cooed into Sofia's ear. "Let's go see the jelly fish."

* * *

"Excuse me?" A tall, muscular man wearing a Chicago Cubs baseball cap inquired from behind Arizona and Callie. "Are you going to do something about that?"

The women both immediately turned toward the voice.

"Something about _what_?" Callie asked in confusion.

"Your kid," the man brusquely replied.

"What about _my_ kid?" Arizona snipped, turning to fully face the man.

"She just jumped in front of my daughter!"

Callie turned back toward Sofia as Arizona continued to engage this highly upset father.

"What's your problem?" Arizona quipped, stepping closer to him. "It's a freakin' kid sized submarine, and there are like fifteen children over there - all fighting to have their chance to look through those three tiny little windows. Get over yourself."

"Arizona. . ." Callie warned her wife when she returned from gathering Sofia from the pack of inquisitive tiny humans and, then turning toward the concerned parent, she sighed. "I'm sorry, sir. It's kind of a madhouse over there. . ."

"Don't apologize to him, Calliope," Arizona haughtily advised. "He's being an ass, and his kid clearly needs to toughen up."

"Arizona!" Callie replied, shocked at her wife's words.

Arizona merely rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Callie again stated when she turned back toward the man and, then grabbing her wife's hand, she moved to pull her away. "Come on, Arizona. We're going."

"No, Calliope, we are _not_ going anywhere."

"Yes. We are," Callie insisted, pulling the fuming blonde away from the exhibit and toward the row of strollers lining the wall and, settling Sofia into hers, Callie buckled her in before unlocking the breaks with her foot and guiding the stroller toward the exit, tugging her now irate wife behind her.

"Let go of me!" Arizona yelled as Callie dragged her through the central concourse of the Aquarium and toward the large doors of the main entrance. "Let go of me!"

"What the Hell is wrong with you, today?" Callie shouted once they were out of the building.

Arizona flailed the arm still caught in Callie's grasp. "Just let go of me!"

"Stop it, Arizona!" Callie scolded, dropping the blonde's arm as she turned to face her wife where they stood shouting at each other in the middle of the Aquarium parking lot. "We are not doing this, again! We are so far past this place! What the Hell is wrong with you?"

"She's my baby, too!" Arizona shouted back at her wife. "She's my baby, and I can take care of her by myself!"

Callie halted, her mind laboring to comprehend the implications of her wife's words. "Of course she is," Callie gently replied, her prior anger now converting to confusion and uncertainty. "Of course you can."

Arizona sighed, her shoulders slumping. "Just take me home," she demanded, her eyes now hardened with resentment. "Please. Just take me home."

* * *

Glancing toward her wife, Callie was unable to determine what Arizona was feeling, her every feature a jumbled mix of negative emotions.

Hurt.

Anger.

Sadness.

Disappointment.

Callie hadn't seen her look like this in several months, and the fact that she now did – the fact that her amazing wife was falling back into the dark abyss of depression and rage – scared the Latina to death.

Clearing her throat, Callie quickly turned her attention back toward the road. "You want to stop somewhere for dinner?" she hesitantly asked as she pulled the car out of the parking lot.

"Do I look like I want to stop somewhere for dinner?" Arizona quipped, her gaze fixed out the side window at the passing trees, her tone dripping with contempt. "Do I look like I want to go anywhere with you?" she resentfully questioned.

Callie's shoulders slumped. She had stopped being her wife's punching bag months ago and that comment – that little remark spewing from her wife's lips after all the healing they had done – was just too much to swallow.

"Just take me home!"

"Fine!" Callie angrily spat, unable to hold back the condescension she was feeling. "Whatever you want."

* * *

Grabbing the key to the RV door from where it rested in the cup holder of their rental car, Arizona jerked open the passenger's side door before the car had even rolled to a stop. Slamming the car door behind her, she then stalked toward the larger vehicle, quickly taking the stairs, before unlocking the door and entering their mobile home - that door also crashing shut behind her in the wake of her punishing tirade.

She just - she felt claustrophobic.

She needed to breathe.

But, she really just wanted to run.

She needed to detach herself from the disappointed and saddened eyes of the wife she adored. She needed to distance herself from the precocious toddler who held her heart in the palm of her chubby little hand.

And, slamming the bedroom door closed, she quickly turned the lock before sliding down the door and landing awkwardly onto the floor.

Finally giving into the torrent of emotions that had been slowly building inside her tormented mind and body for most of the day, Arizona let her tears fall. And, digging the heels of her hands into her eyes as she continued to cry, she agonizingly considered what had caused this deluge of negative emotions to coil so tightly inside of her before ultimately exploding from their confinement.

_Despite the minor hitch they had experienced during their love making the previous night, Arizona awoke early that morning completely sated and undeniably happy. Rolling toward the middle of the bed, she kissed Callie's shoulder blade before grabbing her crutches and entering the bathroom for a shower._

_Shower complete, clothing and prosthesis donned, make-up applied, hair straightened and tucked behind one ear, Arizona paused momentarily to scrutinize the woman staring back at her in the mirror and, as she allowed her gaze to examine every inch of herself, she couldn't help the smile that turned at the corners of her lips._

_Callie was right._

_Despite everything she had been forced to endure, Arizona Robbins was still fundamentally the same person. Arizona Robbins was still. . .hot._

"_Mamma! Mamma!" Arizona's silent reverie was soon broken when she heard Sofia calling for her from the next room. "Get my out!"_

_Arizona's smile widened as she listened to her daughter chattering through the walls of the RV and, quietly moving through the bedroom, she briefly allowed herself to admire the shapely form of her sleeping wife before exiting the room to gather Sofia._

"_Morning, big girl!" Arizona cooed when she entered the room. _

_Pulling the toddler from her crib, she then turned to take the six steps separating the chair from the baby bed, but accidentally caught her right toe on the leg of the crib, sending her suddenly unbalanced body stumbling toward the floor._

_Overcome by sudden panic and fear, her first instinct was to protect Sofia who continued to chatter, completely oblivious to the fact that they were about to tumble to the ground. _

_Reaching forward with her left hand, with Sofia firmly held in her right arm, Arizona attempted to soften their fall by grasping the side of the crib and, landing on her back side with a groan, her heart pounding in her ears, Arizona immediately looked over Sofia to assure she hadn't injured anything during their minor scuffle. _

"_I'm sorry, baby," she softly stated as she pulled the little girl closer to her body, hugging her daughter tightly._

_Her daughter._

_Callie's daughter._

_Mark's daughter._

_Arizona's frightened mind instantly flashed to a time not long before when she had shamefully denied this wonderful little girl. Shamefully and disgracefully used this amazing tiny human to lash out at and scathingly cut the mother who was struggling to keep their family afloat._

"_. . .I will make all the decisions. Just so you know, I'm gonna vote to take the settlement for Sofia because Mark would want her to have the money."_

"_I think Mark would want you to pick up YOUR daughter when she's crying. I guess he's gonna have to deal with disappointment just like the rest of us. . ."_

_Arizona regretted those words the moment they punitively sprung from her venomous tongue. In that moment, however, completely consumed by rage and despair, she was wholly unable to stop herself._

_At that point in time, she felt like she was drowning. She was hurt and lonely and just so mad. She was sad and lost and hopeless, and in that moment, her intent was simply to wound. The rage that boiled inside of her made her want to physically throttle something or someone but, instead, she chose to wound with her malicious words._

_By allowing those words to fly from her lips, Arizona felt in control of something. She was hitting hard and hitting fast so she would only have to hit once, because she wanted Callie to feel every bit of the pain, sadness, frustration, and disappointment that had taken hold, relentlessly consuming and possessing her once joyful soul. _

_But, in the end, she had only made herself feel more miserable than before._

_How could she have denied this innocent child she loved unconditionally? _

_Arizona had made a lot of mistakes in the aftermath of the plane crash, but those words – those words bitterly hurled for no reason other than to deeply cut her wife – she would do anything to take back._

* * *

Two hours after her wife had abruptly disappeared into the confinement of their bedroom, Callie sat in a chair in the corner of Sofia's bedroom, rocking the drowsy toddler to sleep. Humming softly, she stroked the child's face as she blankly stared at the wall separating the two bedrooms. And, soon recognizing that Sofia had drifted off by the sound of her now steady breathing, Callie kissed the top of her head before standing and placing the toddler in her crib. Covering her with a soft, pink blanket, Callie's hand lingered over the child's heart. "Mommy loves you, baby girl," she whispered as she softly stroked her chest. "Mamma loves you, too."

Exiting the room, Callie quietly pulled the door closed and, staring at the adjacent bedroom door that still remained shut and locked, she pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes.

Deciding to take a chance, she hesitantly stepped toward the door, raising her hand to knock gently, but stopped suddenly, unsure of what she would actually say if Arizona did happen to open up and let her in. So, turning around, she leaned against the door before sliding down it to sit on the floor as her own thoughts and memories began to flood her troubled mind.

Callie couldn't deny the distressing familiarity that had consumed her mind and body when she had grabbed Arizona's arm earlier that day to lead her out of the Aquarium, nor could she disregard the uncompromisingly hard and glacial expression in her wife's darkened blue eyes or the unrestricted malice in her wife's words, looking and sounding so similar to what they had been months before.

"_. . .do I look like I want to go anywhere for dinner?"_

"_. . .do I look like I want to go anywhere with you?"_

Callie shook her head, recalling her wife's words from earlier that evening as words from months prior also took hold of her mind.

"_. . .do I look okay? I'm sitting in a pool of my own urine!"_

"_I'm putting you in the shower."_

"_No! Just get out!"_

"_Hey! Do not talk to me that way!"_

"_Please. . ."_

"_Arizona!"_

"_Please! Get out! Did you hear me? You did this! I can't even pee by myself!"_

Callie shook her head as she tightly squeezed her eyes shut and, wiping at the tears that now slid down her cheeks, Callie placed her palm over her mouth in an attempt to stifle the sound of her whimpers.

The words she had uttered next, she wasn't proud of. Callie regretted those words the moment they punitively sprung from her venomous tongue. In that moment, however, completely consumed by rage and despair, she was wholly unable to stop herself.

"_Yeah, and that's a problem! Because you now stink! This bathroom stinks!"_

_At that point in time, she felt like she was drowning. She was hurt and lonely and just so mad. She was sad and lost and hopeless, and in that moment, her intent was not necessarily to wound, though she was sure she had. The rage that boiled inside of her made her want to physically throttle something or someone, but instead, she chose to attempt a little tough love. She was trying to get Arizona to understand that she couldn't do this on her own and that she needed to let people help her, though the words that actually spilled from her mouth were much less eloquent and much more cruel._

_Callie needed to feel in control of something – anything. So, she had allowed the pain, sadness, frustration, and disappointment to take hold and relentlessly consume her as she threw Arizona's arms around her neck, hoisting her wife up off the floor and into the shower, slamming her flailing body against the tiled wall. _

"_Get off of me!"_

"_I am not sharing my home with someone who smells like this!"_

"_Get off of me! Get off of me!"_

"_I have nowhere else to go? This is my life now, too. . ."_

Leaning back against that bedroom door, sobs wracked Callie's body, just as they had months before in the shower of the apartment she shared with her wife and daughter and, now holding her head in her hands, she halted suddenly when she heard strangled cries coming from the opposite side of the door.

Turning to kneel facing it, she quickly grabbed the door knob to enter, but was foiled by the still bolted lock.

"Arizona. . ."

"Callie. . ."

Both women spoke simultaneously.

"Please let me in, Arizona," Callie pleaded as she tugged on the door knob.

"I-I want to, but. . .I'm not sure I know how," the blonde sobbed.

Struck by the double meaning in their statements, Callie could only cry harder as she heard her wife take a deep shuddering breath. "Please, Arizona, please," she begged. "We've come so far. Please don't shut me out. Not now."

"I. . .I'm so ashamed, Callie," Arizona haltingly cried. "I'm so ashamed and mad. . .and, I don't even think I can look at you right now. I thought I was healing. I thought we were healing. What the fuck happened?"

Callie instantly recoiled at the honesty in her wife's strangled words. "I don't know, sweetie," she ruefully replied. "We've both done - and said - horrible, disgraceful things. I've done so much that I'm not proud of. But we're here. We're both still _here_."

Callie struggled to continue speaking through the tears that continued to fall and the emotions that coursed through her veins.

"And when you're ready - when you can look at me - I'll be right here. I'm not leaving, Arizona."

Callie once again lowered herself to sit with her back against the door as she continued to listen to Arizona's heart wrenching sobs. Resting her head against the door, she too continued to cry until finally her eyes ran dry and she fell into a fitful sleep.

* * *

**AN: ** Thank you so much for continuing to read and review! I am really enjoying your comments! Thanks again.


	12. Chapter 12

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **A lot of this chapter has been changed from the original. There were just parts of it that didn't quite make sense to me, so I scrapped them and started again. Hope you like!

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

* * *

Arizona awoke with a start, her neck aching miserably from the awkward position she had fallen asleep in against the bedroom door. And, stretching her stiff neck from side to side in an attempt to rid herself of the discomfort, she reached into her jacket pocket for her phone to check the time.

2:26am.

Surprised that she had survived sleeping upright against the unforgiving stiffness of the wooden door for more than three hours, Arizona hastily shoved her phone back into her pocket before crawling toward the bed and reaching for the mattress to assist herself into standing.

Once on her feet, she stripped off her clothing and prosthesis and replaced them with pajama shorts and a long sleeved t-shirt and, then throwing her body back onto the bed, she allowed the events of the previous day to consume her already burdened mind.

Hearing Callie's almost frantic sobs from the other side of the door as she sat barricaded in the bedroom was certainly not what Arizona had expected from her wife. She knew Callie would be angry at her – or hurt even by her words and actions – but in no way had she imagined she would hear her wife admitting to doing some kind of horrible, disgraceful things that she wasn't proud of.

That wasn't the response she had expected at all and, after searching the deepest recesses of her weary mind, Arizona remained wholly unsure of what Callie could possibly be referring to.

Deciding to get something to drink before climbing into the cold, empty bed, Arizona grabbed her crutches and then moved to unlock the door, quietly stepping out into the main cabin of the RV.

Opening the refrigerator door, she grabbed a bottle of water, immediately removing the lid and taking a drink and, then stepping back toward the bedroom, she momentarily glanced to her left, spotting a mess of maps, the GPS, Callie's cell phone and iPod, pens, and paper strewn about. And, with her brow furrowing in question, she decidedly aborted her path back to bed, quietly taking a seat at the table.

Curiously sorting through the mess, Arizona soon came upon the large map of the United States that Callie had meticulously been keeping, the brunette placing a sticker of Sofia's choice over each and every one of the places they had been.

Smiling slightly at the sight, Arizona gently ran the tips of her fingers over the stickers that had been joyfully and lovingly placed by her wife and daughter.

Minnie Mouse over Glacier National Park in Montana.

Thomas the Train over the Grand Canyon.

Sofia the First over San Antonio.

Olivia the Pig over Dallas.

Eyeing the other stickers that now graced the paper map, Arizona glanced toward their current location in Chicago, Illinois. Noting that a sticker had not yet been placed there, she was surprised to see that - instead - a red X marked the spot and was now connected to a red line charting the most direct route from their current location back to Seattle.

Following the line with her eyes, Arizona saw an even larger red X on the map covering the entire state of Idaho. In blue ink instead of red, the blonde noted another route that Callie had strategically plotted, purposefully diverting their trip around that whole godforsaken state.

Swallowing the lump that was forming in her throat, Arizona sipped her water before painstakingly folding the map before sorting through and straightening the rest of the paraphernalia scattered across the table. Uncovering a notepad in the process, she hesitantly opened it to a page covered in Callie's familiar large scrawl.

_Call Barbara &amp; Daniel_

_Call Owen_

_Call day-care_

_Text Karev_

_Check for flights from Chicago to Seattle?_

_Storage for RV/Sell RV?_

_Have apartment cleaned_

_Call David - ?tweak knee flexion?_

_Call lawyer_

Arizona's heart dropped as she read and reread the to-do list Callie had clearly made for herself.

They were going home.

Callie was giving up and making plans, and they were going home.

There would be no trip to her parents' house for Thanksgiving because she and Callie would be back at work, and Sofia would be back in day-care.

The RV would be stored or sold to the highest bidder after their arrival back in Seattle, because Callie had clearly remembered the unfortunate difficulty behind flying home instead.

The apartment would be cleaned.

She would have a PT appointment already scheduled upon their arrival home because, apparently, Callie was concerned about her prosthesis.

And, for some reason, Callie would also be speaking with their lawyer.

Feeling a twinge of guilt for perhaps stumbling upon something her wife wasn't quite ready for her to see; Arizona quickly pushed herself away from the table before standing with her crutches in order to return to the bedroom but, hearing movement from somewhere behind her, the blonde noticed for the first time that Callie was asleep under a mountain of blankets on the plush cushions of the couch.

Hesitating momentarily, Arizona decided to step toward the fitfully sleeping woman and, taking a seat on the end of the couch, the blonde watched her wife's eyes twitch as a dream filled her lethargic mind.

"Oh, Callie. . ."Arizona repentantly breathed out more to herself than anyone else and, after studying her wife for several long moments, she quickly turned her head when she noticed Callie begin to stir.

But, ultimately deciding that she wouldn't be able to escape quickly enough to go unnoticed by her wife, she reluctantly decided to turn her attention back toward the rapidly awakening brunette.

"Arizona?" Callie groggily called, sensing her wife's presence. "You okay?" she asked, her eyes blinking several times as she pushed herself up to sit against the arm of the couch.

Arizona sat quietly and, staring out ahead of her, adamantly refusing to meet her wife's gaze, she sighed, unsure of where she should even begin.

She had scrutinized every single word she wanted to say to her wife as she sat crying against the bedroom door the night before but, unfortunately, the words now escaped her. But, realizing she needed to say something, she hesitantly scooted back onto the now empty cushion of the couch before briefly turning her attention toward her wife, the apprehension and concern Callie was feeling, more than evident in those deep brown, soulful eyes.

"I made a promise."

Callie barely heard the words her wife had so softly uttered, her brow furrowing in question - begging her to please elaborate.

"To Sofia. And, to you," Arizona clarified, tears welling in her exhausted blue eyes. "I made a promise."

Callie once again sat in silence, unwilling to interrupt her wife's admission, but desperately needing her to say more.

Wiping at her eyes before the tears had a chance to escape the barrier of her eyelids, Arizona cleared her throat, visibly steeling herself for whatever she was about to say. "The day she was born. She wasn't breathing. Her heart wasn't beating. _Your heart _wasn't beating. . ."

Arizona trailed off, her eyes visibly clouded by the memories that flashed through her mind and, as Callie continued to watch her wife struggle for what to say next, she cautiously reached out to take her hand.

"And, on that day, as I stood there desperately trying to get her tiny little heart to beat while hoping and praying that yours would do the same, I made a promise," Arizona continued, grasping Callie's hand and holding on for dear life. "I promised that if her heart would just beat for _me_ and if you would just _live_ for _me, _then I would spend the rest of my life doing everything I could to make you both happy."

"You _do_ make us happy," Callie interrupted, desperately needing to make her wife hear it - and believe it.

Arizona shook her head in reply, holding up her hand, begging Callie to let her finish. "I was able to keep that promise for a while - for a little over a year after Sofia was born. Because, that's who I am. That's what I do," she proudly explained before pausing as she considered what she was about to say next. "But, then. . .the plane. . ."

Arizona faltered, still scared to voice her insecurities aloud even after all this time.

"Arizona. . ."

"I made a promise, Calliope, and when I make a promise, I keep it."

Upon hearing these words, Callie's head immediately snapped to full attention, unparalleled anger, hurt, and irritation instantly springing up from somewhere deep inside - from somewhere in the deepest recesses of her soul where she had forced them to retreat to months before.

"And I clearly don't!" Callie sharply stated, her tone biting into the quiet that had fallen over the vehicle after Arizona's revelation.

Arizona immediately shook her head - that was not what she had meant at all.

Completely disregarding her wife, Callie wasn't sure where the next words she spoke were actually coming from, but she was wholly unable to stop them as they slipped from her tongue. "I _promised_ not to let them take your leg. A promise I clearly couldn't keep, which - in turn - did what, Arizona? Forced _you_ to break your own promise? Forced _you_ to do something that just isn't you? What the Hell, Arizona? Is there anything left in the world that you _don't_ blame me for?"

"Callie. . ."

Throwing the blanket back from her legs, Callie swiftly jumped from her seat, quickly moving through the vehicle toward the bedroom. She was - and had been - trying to be patient and understanding and anything else Arizona needed her to be, but clearly her tolerance and emotions were wearing thin.

"It appears that you've gotten over your inability to look at me, so if it's okay with you, I'm going to enter _your_ bedroom, now. I'd like to change the clothes I've been wearing for the past twenty hours," Callie angrily spat at the now speechless blonde. "I won't stay. I won't sleep with you. I won't touch you, or-or _fuck_ you. Or anything else that may send your universe into a fucking cataclysm. . ."

"Calliope!"

"No, Arizona. Don't Calliope me," Callie angrily stated, closing her eyes and dismissing her wife with a wave of her hand. "I can't do this. I cannot continue to bear the burden of ruining your life. I can't walk around on eggshells all the time. I can't spend the rest of my life wondering when the shit is going to hit the fan," she angrily muttered as she began to pace the vehicle.

"Will you just listen to me?"

"No, Arizona! I won't listen. I can't listen. Not anymore," Callie firmly stated. "I never know what you're going to say or do and, half the time, I'm not even sure of what the Hell you're talking about. You tell me you don't want to go home, then you demand I take you back to Seattle. You tell me you won't run, then you lock yourself in the damn bedroom. You spend the day arguing with me over what's best for Sofia, but then you completely disregard and abandon her when it's convenient for you. . ."

"I fell," Arizona meekly admitted.

"You blame me for breaking a. . ." Callie paused, barely hearing her wife's voice over her own tirade. "What?"

"Yesterday morning," Arizona hesitantly stated. "When I was getting Sofia up before the museum. I tripped over the leg of her crib, and I - _we_ fell. . ." Arizona trailed off as she stared at her now silent wife. "I fell, Callie. I fell over while carrying our daughter."

"Are you okay?" Callie asked, concern now clearly evident in her voice. "Is Sofia okay?"

Anger instantly flashed across the blonde's face. "Of course she's okay! I'm not stupid. I may be disabled, but I'm not a fucking moron."

"I-I didn't mean. . ."

"Yes. A little bit you did!" Arizona immediately scolded. "I see how you look at me. I see how you watch me with Sofia. And falling with her yesterday just brought back up all the insecurities I still have. That's why I was being so crazy, yesterday. I was overcompensating, and I got - _out of hand_ \- with that guy at the aquarium. . ."

Callie swallowed the lump that had now settled in her throat. "Arizona, yesterday at the aquarium. . ."

Arizona shook her head, once again unable to meet her wife's gaze. "I've said some really horrible things to you, Calliope. . ."

Callie searched the blonde's entire form, confused by the sudden shift in the trajectory of their conversation and, taking a seat back on the couch, she let out a shaky breath in an attempt to gather her conflicted thoughts and settle her volatile emotions. "Arizona. . ."

"No, Callie. I have."

Taking in her wife's defeated posture and crushed tone of voice, Callie patted the cushion beside her. "Arizona, please come sit with me."

Arizona's eyes darted between the seat next to her wife and the bedroom door and, valiantly fighting the urge she felt to run, she ultimately decided that she needed to stop.

She needed to stop running. And, she needed to face her fears. And, deciding that this was indeed the time, Arizona hesitantly moved toward the sofa.

Leaning her crutches against the front of it, she gently took a seat a slight distance from her wife, both women facing forward, nervously staring at the far wall of the vehicle, neither sure of where to begin.

It was Callie's voice that cut through the ominous silence first.

"I need you to be honest with me, Arizona."

"Okay."

Callie thoughtfully chose her words. "Do you still want to be with me?"

Arizona was initially shocked by her wife's question, though if she was being honest with herself, she knew she had no right to be.

She had been a monster. Behaved awfully. Treated Callie awfully.

And, finally turning to face the brunette who nervously sat wringing her hands as she continued to stare across the room, Arizona sighed as she placed a hand over Callie's to halt their anguished movements.

"Yes, Calliope," Arizona softly, but firmly stated. "Without question."

Callie loudly exhaled the breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. "I'm so sorry," she cried when she finally met her wife's gaze. "I shouldn't have grabbed you, yesterday. I shouldn't have dragged you out of the aquarium. I shouldn't have shoved you against the wall. . ."

Arizona's brow furrowed in confusion. "Wh-what wall?"

Callie shook her head, immediately ashamed of herself for allowing her thoughts of the past to filter into their present conversation. "In the shower. . .at home. Before. I could have hurt you. I was just so scared. And so hurt. I was afraid you were giving up."

"Callie. . ."

"Please, Arizona. Just let me say this. I've waited too long already, so please let me finish," Callie requested as she squeezed her wife's hands and, running her thumb over the blonde's diamond studded wedding band, a tear slowly slipped down a perfectly tanned cheek. "When I came to get you that night – for the settlement meeting – I couldn't find you, and my mind immediately jumped to the worst possible conclusion."

Arizona's mouth fell agape at the words her wife had just uttered, a breathy gasp leaving her lips. "I could never. . ."

Callie shook her head, unsure if she believed Arizona's response to be true.

"Never," Arizona again stated, seeing the unconvinced concern written across Callie's entire face.

Callie nodded, though she wasn't completely convinced. "I was so scared. But then, there you were. You were there, and you were okay, but you looked so defeated. So vulnerable. All I wanted was for you to understand that no matter what you thought, you couldn't do it on your own. You wouldn't let me help you, though. You just kept fighting me when all I wanted was to be there for you," Callie stammered, her tears continuing to flow. "I said horrible things to you that night. Terrible. . .cruel things. And then, when you needed me most – when I should have been _your_ rock – I faltered, Arizona. I broke."

"Oh, Callie," Arizona whispered as she pulled her wife into her arms. "It's okay. I'm okay. We're going to be okay."

Callie pulled back, adamantly shaking her head. "It's not okay, Arizona. What kind of person - what kind of wife says those things to the person she loves more than anything else in the world?"

"It's not like I made it easy," Arizona softly replied.

"You were in a plane crash, Arizona! You lost your leg!"

"That still doesn't excuse my behavior, Calliope," Arizona gently admitted. "Some of it - _maybe_ \- but not the things I said about you. About. . .Sofia."

Now Callie was confused.

"What are you talking about?"

Arizona wiped at the dampness from her own cheeks and, sighing heavily, she ran her palms back and forth against the tops of her thighs. "When we fell yesterday, I started to second guess myself again. It made me feel useless and incapable of caring for her. It made me feel like I did when. . ."

Arizona paused, not wanting to hear the words she was about to say fall from her own mouth. "I denied her, Calliope. I told you to pick up _your_ daughter like she wasn't mine. I rejected her when she needed me most. What kind of mother. . ." she trailed off, her voice cracking with emotion. "That's the promise I broke, Callie. And, I'm so ashamed of myself."

Callie gathered the blonde into her arms as sobs consumed her body. "No, baby, don't do this to yourself. You tripped and fell. That could have happened to anyone. It doesn't make you any less capable of caring for her. It's okay," Callie gently spoke, desperately trying to soothe. "You're okay. Sofia's okay. And, she loves you. _I_ love you. More than anything. I just wish you could see it."

Both women clung to each other as their tears fell, the raw emotion of their own resentment and humiliation seeping from their exhausted minds and bodies with every fallen tear.

"I love you, too," Arizona breathed into Callie's ear moments later.

When their tears began to subside, Callie pressed the blonde to lie down on the couch, settling herself against the back of the cushions and pulling her wife's back to rest firmly against her front.

"We have to stop doing this, Arizona."

Callie sighed as she smoothed blonde hair away from her wife's face and, leaning forward, she ran her nose along a smooth, ivory jaw line before gently kissing her cheek. "We should know better by now. We should know that we get ourselves into so much more trouble by not talking – by not being honest. Why do we do that? Why are we so afraid of each other?"

Arizona pondered her wife's question.

"Because we both know we have the power to break the other. We know it would be unbearable to go through life without the other at our side."

Callie curled her arm around her wife's body, pressing her palm to Arizona's flat stomach as she pulled her body flush against her own. "I couldn't bear to have you missing from my life, Arizona. I wouldn't survive that."

Carefully rolling over to face her wife, Arizona reached up, reverently brushing her thumb against the prominence of a caramel cheek. "I'm right here, Calliope. I'm not going anywhere. In fact, neither of us are going anywhere. Not yet."

Noticing the confusion etched into Callie's tired features, Arizona continued. "I saw your list."

"I think maybe it's time," Callie conceded with a sigh. "I think it's time to go home."

Arizona shook her head, desperately hoping she could get her defeated wife to change her mind.

"No, Callie. Not yet. I'm not ready. _We're_ not ready."

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and review!


	13. Chapter 13

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Thirteen**_

* * *

"Oh my goodness, Arizona! She's gotten so big!" Barbara Robbins squealed when she met her daughter on the front porch of the lovely Cape Cod home she and Daniel had purchased upon moving to Rhode Island.

"I know," Arizona happily stated as she embraced her mother, Sofia clenched tightly on her right hip. "It's hard to believe she'll be two in just a few months," she mused as she kissed the toddler's cheek.

Barbara smiled, admiring the undeniable bond between her daughter and granddaughter. "How are you feeling, sweetheart? How's your leg?" she matter-of-factory asked, her tone radiating genuine concern.

Arizona's eyes briefly widened at the candor of her mother's question, feeling suddenly unnerved and, for some reason, slightly embarrassed by her mother's obvious concern.

To some extent, she had anticipated this type of reaction - her mother never had been one to trifle with subtlety - but, in that moment, Arizona suddenly realized that she was in no way prepared for this torrential onset of fears and emotions that had unexpectedly grabbed on to her and taken hold. This was the first time her parents were seeing her as an amputee, and she suddenly realized - that fact scared her to death.

"I'm fine. _It _is fine," she shortly replied and, with a slight shake of her head, she smiled remorsefully. "Not now, okay?" she nearly begged. "Later. We'll talk later."

Noting the distress in her daughter's voice and the strained look in her blue eyes, Barbara decided to not press her to elaborate. She knew that forcing Arizona would only push her further away, but also knew - from past experience - that she would eventually come to her in her own time.

"Where's Callie?" Barbara asked in an attempt to appease her daughter's wishes as she took Sofia from her arms.

Arizona uncomfortably shifted her weight, but plastered a smile onto her face as she pointed toward the giant vehicle now parked in her parents' driveway.

"Umm. . .she's gathering some of Sofia's things from the RV," Arizona stated as she turned back toward her mother. "She'll be here in just a sec."

Barbara Robbins studied her daughter's face; she could tell something just wasn't quite right. "Everything okay with you two?" she asked, seeing right through the fake smile curling at her daughter's lips.

Arizona's smile faltered slightly upon seeing the knowing look in her mother's eyes but, quickly forcing it to reemerge, she waved when her father stepped out the front door.

"Hi dad," Arizona brightly greeted as she quickly stepped around her mother.

"How are you?" Daniel asked after a quick embrace.

Arizona sighed as those unwanted emotions yet again threatened to take a merciless hold on her psyche. "I. . .I'm good," she replied with a tight nod.

"And look at you," Daniel said as he pulled Sofia from her grandmother's arms. "Arizona, she's grown three inches since we saw her a couple months ago," he stated with a smile. "You're getting to be such a big girl."

"Pop-pop!" Sofia squealed as she patted his cheeks with her hands.

Arizona and Barbara both chuckled as '_The Colonel_' made silly faces at the toddler, bouncing her in his arms.

"Take them inside, Daniel before Sofia catches a cold," Barbara urged after several moments of standing on the front porch. "Show Arizona where they'll be staying?"

Daniel curiously eyed his wife.

"I'm going to go see if Callie needs some help," Barbara offered in explanation. "I'll be right back."

Arizona sighed - why did her mom have to be so damn meddlesome?

"Mom," Arizona warned. "She's. . ."

"She may need help carrying things, Arizona. I know what it's like to have a baby," Barbara insisted, shooing the rest of the family toward the door. "Now go inside with your father."

Arizona sternly eyed her mother. "Just don't. . ."

"Don't _what,_ Arizona? Help your wife?" Barbara incredulously asked and, receiving no response, she plowed on through. "That's incredibly rude, dear, and I'm sure your father and I taught you better," she replied as she quickly rushed down the porch stairs, refusing Arizona a chance for rebuttal.

Knocking briefly on the RV door, Barbara then pushed it open, looking around the expanse of the vehicle for her daughter-in-law.

"Callie?" she called. "Do you need some help, dear?"

Receiving no response, Barbara shuffled through the cabin, admiring the elegance and style of the mobile home. "Callie?" she again called from where she stood outside the bedroom door.

Hearing movement behind it, she knocked softly. "Callie? Do you need help with anything?"

The door then abruptly opened, quickly revealing a frazzled looking brunette.

"Barbara! Oh, hey," Callie exclaimed in a rush. "Sorry. I was just trying to get some of our things together to bring into the house."

Barbara watched as her daughter-in-law lugged a large suitcase toward the exit of the RV. "You okay?" she asked. "Can I help you with anything?"

Callie shook her head. "No, I'm okay. I'm fine. Thank you," she replied with a slight smile. "Just trying to. . ."

"What's going on, Callie?" Barbara asked matter-of-factly. "I wasn't born yesterday. I could tell from the moment Arizona set foot on the front porch that something was wrong. And now, here you are hiding out in this thing," she stated with a flourish of her hands.

Callie shrugged her shoulders before nervously glancing around the RV, her eyes landing anywhere but on Barbara's face. "Nothing's wrong. Not exactly. And I'm not hiding," she finally offered with a slight smile.

Callie then trailed off, looking toward the floor, worried that she had already said too much. Barbara was Arizona's mother and confidant, not hers, and Callie was sure there was some unwritten law somewhere that said talking to your mother-in-law about these kinds of things was certainly punishable by death.

"Calliope Torres!" Barbara chastised, her tone instantly setting Callie on high alert. "Arizona's a tough one. I've known her for thirty-five years, and it's taken me that long to be able to read her, but you. . .you wear your heart on your sleeve, honey. I've only known you for a few years, and I can already read you like a book."

Callie opened her mouth several times to speak, but was completely unable to form a coherent sentence. "I. . .it's. . .we. . ."

"You can tell me, Callie," Barbara gently insisted, making herself at home as she took a seat at the dining table. "You're my daughter now, too."

Callie stood momentarily, watching as Barbara admired the map of the United States that she and Sofia had filled with stickers and, with a heavy sigh, she hesitantly stepped closer before slowly sliding into the seat across from her mother-in-law.

"Nothing's wrong," she hesitantly admitted. "Not exactly," she further stated. "It's just. . .we've had a few _tense_ moments lately. We're both still just trying to figure things out."

Barbara watched the younger woman with care and concern in her eyes. "How's she doing?' she asked.

Callie considered her words, a slight smile creeping onto her face. "Better. Really, she's doing so much better."

"I'm glad to hear that," Barbara immediately replied. "I know she's a grown woman, but she's still my baby. She doesn't call much anymore, but when she does, she seems happy some days, but others. . ."

Barbara trailed off, sadness creeping into her blue eyes.

"Yeah," Callie nodded in agreement. "Unfortunately, that's pretty much what we've been dealing with. It's gotten better, though. In the beginning, I never knew which Arizona I'd be faced with from one minute to the next. Then we had good hours that turned into good days. On this trip, we've actually even had a good week, but it's definitely been difficult a lot of the time."

"I thought things were getting better. She told me about the trip to see Teddy and taking Sofia to the park and the dancing. "

Callie smiled slightly at the memory. "Yeah, we've had some really great times on this trip. But, also some really awful ones. . ."

Callie's face fell. "It's just so hard sometimes."

"Please don't give up on her, Callie."

Callie was immediately struck by Barbara's words.

Did every member of the Robbins family think she was just going to give up and walk away from Arizona?

"I'm not going anywhere," Callie flatly stated, slightly irritated by the assumption and, carefully considering her words, she nervously fiddled with her fingernails. "We ran into some _issues_ a few days ago in Chicago. We talked about it, and I thought things were okay. I mean, we had a wonderful time in Niagara Falls after that, but for the past couple days of driving, she's just kind of removed herself. She's gone inside herself."

Barbara nodded her head in complete understanding. "That's how she's always been. She internalizes all her thoughts and fears and chooses to process things on her own even when she is surrounded by people who love her and are willing to help her."

"Yes, and I hate it," Callie admitted without hesitation. "I'd rather she scream and yell at me - and, trust me, there's been a lot of that. But, the silence. I can't handle the silence."

Barbara regarded her daughter-in-law with concern in her eyes. "Callie. . ."

"I'm sorry. That was a lot," Callie sheepishly stated and, quickly standing from her seat, she nervously moved around the vehicle, gathering some of Sofia's toys to take with her into the Robbins' home. "I didn't mean to put that all on you. I shouldn't be telling you all of this."

"You don't have to apologize. I knew she wouldn't tell me, so I came to you," Barbara replied as she too stood from her chair. "You saved my daughter's life, Callie, and I will never be able to thank you enough for that."

Callie lowered the toys she held in her arms to the floor when she saw tears well up in her mother-in-law's eyes. "Oh, I. . .I didn't mean to make you cry. Please don't cry," she said as she stepped in front of her.

Barbara waved her off, struggling to find words. "It's not you," she replied, brushing the tears from her cheeks. "When you called to tell us that Arizona's plane was missing, I just knew they were going to find them. They had to, Callie, because I couldn't bear to lose another child," Barbara softly admitted.

Stepping closer, Callie placed a gentle hand onto Barbara's arm in an attempt to somehow comfort her.

"Then you let us know that they had been rescued, and when we left Seattle when Arizona's infection finally began to improve, I was sure everything was going to be fine."

Barbara paused, smiling slightly through her tears. "But then, you called to tell us about the amputation. I'm so, so happy she's alive, but I feel so cheated. It's irrational, I know, but since then, I just keep thinking about when she was a baby," Barbara admitted with a shake of her head. "We lost Timothy- no mother should ever have to endure that loss, Callie. But Arizona's alive, and all I keep thinking about is how, when she was a baby, I would tickle and play with her little toes. "

Tears instantly sprung to Callie's eyes as she thought about doing the exact same thing to Sofia - about how she would playfully nip at and kiss freshly bathed toes while she dressed her daughter in her pajamas for the night.

Glancing toward the ceiling in an attempt to blink back her tears, Callie cleared her throat, placing a gentle hand on each of Barbara's arms. And, taking a deep breath, she finally met the older woman's misty blue eyed gaze.

"I'm so sorry. I never even considered how hard this would be for you. I can't even imagine. If Sofia. . ."

"Please, let's not even think about that," Barbara insisted with a slight smile. "She's beautiful and healthy and just the cutest thing I've ever seen."

Callie smiled at the older woman, delighted and grateful that she was a part of her daughter's life.

"We're going to get through this, Callie. All of us. Together," Barbara then insisted as she reached up to give the younger woman a hug. "I know she's been through a lot, and this has to be incredibly devastating, but a part of me also thinks we just need to figure out how to make my daughter get her stubborn head out of her ass."

A smirk instantly tugged at Callie's lips followed closely by a bark of laughter bubbling up from within her chest as she stood surprised by the candor in Barbara's statement.

"I've actually been thinking about that," Callie then admitted. "I have a few ideas, but I'm going to need your help."

Barbara's eyebrows rose conspiratorially. "This sounds interesting," she surreptitiously replied, helpfully grabbing the toys that Callie had left deserted on the floor. "I'll do anything to make my baby girl smile again."

Callie nodded, fighting to maneuver the suitcase through the door. "Trust me," she earnestly replied as she finally managed to pull the large suitcase down the steps. "That's all I want."

Barbara smiled. "Come on," she said as she urged Callie across the driveway and toward the front door. "Let's get inside before Daniel thinks we've defected and sends a Marine Fighter Attack Squadron looking for us."

* * *

Later that night, Arizona smirked as she entered the guest bedroom of her parents' home, amused by the look of concentration she found on Callie's face as she sat up in bed, ten caramel fingers furiously typing against the keys of her laptop, bright white teeth gnawing at her bottom lip.

With Callie's back resting against several pillows that lined the headboard, Arizona sighed as she settled her weary body under the covers, the side of her arm brushing against the outside of Callie's pajama clad thigh.

"Sorry," Callie absentmindedly stated. "I'll turn off the light in just a minute. I'm trying to find the recipe for the stuffing your dad liked last year. I thought I got it from the Food Network website, but I can't remember which chef it was from."

Arizona stared at the ceiling, scrunching her face as she tried to remember. "I think we saw it on Paula Deen, but you thought it would be too heavy, so you substituted some ingredients you saw on Rachel Ray."

"Oh, God. You're right!" Callie suddenly exclaimed in recollection before quickly looking toward the pack-and-play where Sofia lay sleeping.

Certain her outcry hadn't awakened the sleeping toddler, she turned back toward the computer. "Shit," she hissed. "I'll never be able to duplicate that."

Arizona softly chuckled at her wife's antics . "It'll be fine, Callie. My dad will never know the difference."

Not convinced, Callie continued searching the internet for close to a half hour until she was sure she had found the two recipes she had combined. And, happily bookmarking the pages, she then closed her laptop before setting it aside and sliding down under the covers to lie next to her wife.

They both then lay in the silence of the dark bedroom, their bare shoulders touching slightly.

"You know, I know you and my mom were talking about me earlier. So, you might as well go ahead and tell me," Arizona matter-of-factly stated after several quiet moments.

Callie's eyes nervously shifted toward her wife. "We weren't _really_ talking about you," she hesitantly replied.

"Spill, Calliope."

Callie sighed as she turned onto her side, leaning up on her elbow to look down into curious cerulean eyes. "She's just worried about you, that's all," Callie replied when she was met by her wife's knowing gaze. And, realizing from the look in Arizona's eyes that she couldn't get away with supplying such little information, Callie again sighed. "She said you don't call as much anymore, and when you do, sometimes you seem happy, but other times, not so much. She wanted to know how we're doing, and I just told her that we are doing better, but that you have been kind of. . ._pensive_ for the past couple days, and I'm still not sure why."

Arizona slowly rolled onto her side to face her wife and, propping herself up to her level, she then reached her other hand out to stroke the side of Callie's face.

"It's not you," Arizona softly admitted after a long while. "I promise, Calliope. It's just. . ."

Callie watched Arizona's face fall, blue eyes locking onto the striped design of the sheet beneath them.

"Talk to me, sweetie," Callie softly urged as she hooked her fingers under her wife's chin, pulling her face up so she could look into her brilliant blue eyes. "You can tell me anything."

Arizona shook her head, her eyes then falling shut. "It's my dad," she admitted as her eyes fluttered open, unshed tears uncontrollably collecting and threatening to spill forth. "I've spent the last couple days wondering how I'm going to spend the rest of my life meeting new people every day who are going to see me for the first time."

Arizona paused, her own words making little sense to her own mind. "That made more sense in my head," she admitted with a slight smile.

Callie returned the smile, reaching out to brush away a tear that escaped down her cheek with a swipe of her thumb.

"It's easier with my mom, because she's my mom, you know. I can confide in her. I can tell her anything. Maybe not at the exact moment she wants me to, but eventually, when I'm ready, I can always talk to her. She understands the real me, but my dad. . .I've always had to be tough around him," Arizona earnestly admitted in a rush of sudden strength. "Maybe it's because he's a Marine or maybe he was just never able to differentiate the difference between being a boy's dad versus being a girl's dad, I don't know. But, he always told Tim and me that we needed to be in control of our thoughts and feelings and take charge of our emotions."

"I thought that you'd always gotten along with you dad," Callie stated in confusion.

"We don't _not_ get along. It's not that at all. It's just that he has these expectations. He raised Tim and me to be good men in a storm, to protect the things we love, and to control our emotions and suppress what comes naturally. That's been so difficult to do lately, and I'm afraid that I've let him down."

Callie shook her head, her right hand reaching out to gently caress the length of an ivory arm.

"You haven't let anyone down, Arizona," Callie adamantly replied. "Not me, not Sofia, and certainly not your mom or dad. Your emotions are a real and honest part of you. They make you who you are. No one can fault you for that."

"I know," Arizona huffed as she flopped onto her back, the tips of her fingers now massaging her temples. "I just really need to continue being the person he raised me to be. So, I've spent the last couple days trying to anticipate how I would react when he saw me for the first time. I was trying to figure out how to spend every day as if I'm the same person, when I know he views me differently."

Searching Arizona's face, Callie then leaned forward to gently kiss her wife's cheek. "I think you're underestimating yourself," she sincerely stated. "And your dad, too. I know you want to move on - we all do. But, you can't just pretend like everything's the same."

"What am I supposed to do, then?" Arizona haltingly asked, nearly choking on her emotions.

"Just be honest with him. Sit down and have a conversation."

"Ugh," Arizona pouted, comically rolling over to place her back to her wife. "I knew you were going to say that. I hate you."

Laughing at her wife's behavior, Callie then tugged the smaller woman close, melding her own front into Arizona's back. And, gently caressing the soft flesh of her abdomen with the tips of her fingers, Callie then pressed hot open mouth kisses beneath Arizona's ear before trailing down her neck. "That's because I'm right," Callie insisted with a smile as she then snuck her fingers to rest beneath the elastic of Arizona's pajama pants. "And I'm awesome."

* * *

Arizona awoke the following morning, cocooned in the familiar scents of her childhood, a strong tanned arm wrapped securely around her torso from behind.

Lacing her own fingers through the ones draped over her side, she scooted backward, burrowing herself further into the safety of her wife's embrace. And, inhaling deeply, she was momentarily struck by the familiarity of this new home.

When she was young, her family moved every eighteen months, but her parents always tried to make each and every new house seem like home. Her mom tried to keep things around their houses constant, right down to the laundry detergent and fabric softener she used, apparently to this very day.

Inhaling another deep breath, she rolled onto her back, taking a moment to study the woman lying next to her.

Finally opening up and honestly talking to Callie about how she was feeling in regards to her father had been difficult, but this morning, she was glad she had pushed through. She had no idea that seeing her parents for the first time since the amputation would be so difficult, and it felt nice to be able confide in her wife. It also felt nice that Callie had then rewarded her for her efforts with a lusty make out session that had nearly gone too far with Sofia sleeping in the same room.

With a slight chuckle at the memory, Arizona carefully rolled over in Callie's embrace, her mood soon sobering as she watched Callie sleep.

She knew this visit wouldn't necessarily be easy, but she had no idea she would be inundated with such a profound mix of conflicting emotions.

Seeing her mom yesterday had been difficult, but when her dad stepped out the front door, she was immediately transported back to her childhood. Back to a time when she endeavored to be a straight A student, graduate valedictorian, go to college and then to medical school – back to a time when they taught her to be honorable, caring, respectful, and disciplined – back to a time when she would do anything and everything to delight her parents and remain in their good graces.

Sighing softly, Arizona gently kissed Callie's shoulder before placing a whisper of a kiss against those satiny soft lips. And, as a gentle smile graced her face when she heard a soft, contented moan leave her wife's mouth, Arizona then lifted the arm - heavy with sleep - that surrounded her body. Then moving from the bed, she donned her prosthesis and a pair of UGG boots before enveloping the upper half of her body in a soft hooded sweatshirt that belonged to her wife. Content that Sofia was also still sleeping comfortably, Arizona quietly exited the room.

Wandering through the unfamiliar yet vastly recognizable surroundings of her parents' house, Arizona strolled into the kitchen, the inviting smell of freshly brewed coffee further awakening her sleep addled mind. Pouring herself a cup and adding just the right amount of cream and sugar, she then continued her journey through the house admiring photos of herself and Tim, herself with Callie and Sofia, and various other items that signified integral stages of her parents' lives.

Then stepping out the front door, she leaned against a large column of the white porch railing as she sipped her coffee, breathing in a refreshing breath of the cool autumn air.

"Good morning, Arizona."

Quickly spinning around, she very nearly lost her balance, but was able to stabilize herself by grasping onto the rail.

"Holy shit, dad! You scared the crap out of me!" Arizona exclaimed when she finally saw her father sitting on the porch swing. And, steadying the coffee mug in her hand, she took a shaky step forward. "I thought you'd be at work."

Daniel smiled, secretly pleased by the presence of his daughter's childlike words and phrases, mixing with the expletives of an adult.

"When we found out you'd be joining us for Thanksgiving, I decided to take a few days off," Daniel admitted, patting the wooden slats of the swing as an invitation for her to take a seat next to him.

Arizona hesitated momentarily, uncertainty filling her mind.

"Sit, Arizona," he insisted.

Pensively stepping toward him, she slowly lowered herself onto the swing, an obvious distance left between them.

"I love the house," Arizona stated after a quiet moment, unsure if what else to say. "I've been thinking that Callie and I should get a house, so Sofia has a yard - a place to run."

"That little girl sure is a bundle of energy," Daniel mused. "You and Callie are doing such a wonderful job with her. She's smart, self-assured - she reminds me a lot of you at that age."

Arizona smiled uneasily, the impact of her father's words threatening to release the tidal wave of emotions she was so desperately trying to suppress. And, averting his piercing blue eyes, identical to her own, she sighed, shifting uncomfortably in her seat.

"When Callie called to tell us that your plane was missing. . ."

"Dad," Arizona interrupted, shaking her head, willing him to change the subject. "Please. . ."

"When she called us," he pushed on, needing to get this all out. "It was like nothing I've ever experienced before in my life. Not even when your brother. . ."

Daniel trailed off, clearing his throat in an attempt to gather his thoughts.

"With Timothy, the risk was always there. It's just the nature of the job," he tried to explain. "I'm not saying it wasn't painful, I just mean that when a father hears that his daughter - the only child he has left - a Pediatric Surgeon, who should be safe in a hospital saving the lives of children is missing somewhere in the middle of the Cascade Mountain. . ."

Daniel paused, shaking his head. "Well, that's a lot to take in."

"I'm sorry," Arizona quietly replied, hanging her head as shame and guilt threatened to consume her.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Arizona. Sometimes bad things happen to good people – really good people. Just like with Timothy."

"Timothy was the best," she earnestly stated, once again meeting her father's gaze.

"Both of my children are the _best_."

Not convinced, Arizona tilted her head to the side, studying her father's face. "I've been so worried about what you were going to think of me – how you would feel about me being – less than whole – less than who you raised me to be."

Daniel's brow furrowed in response. "Less than whole?" he questioned. "Just because you lost your leg - that doesn't make you less of anything. You're still fundamentally the same capable, talented, and accomplished person I raised you to be. It's a process, Arizona, and it's okay to grieve. Your life is never going to be the same. People are going to stare and say ridiculous things, but it's up to you to be able to overcome that. I taught you to have a positive attitude and to control your emotions."

"I can't, Dad!" Arizona huffed, the volume of her own voice emitting more loudly than she had anticipated. "I can't control my emotions when it comes to this. Sometimes I'm fine, but then other times I'm pissed and scared and want to hit something."

"Then be pissed. Be scared. Hit something," Daniel insisted. "Just not Callie or Sofia," he half-heartedly teased, trying to diffuse the anger rising within his daughter. "I'm not saying that you should pretend that nothing has changed. I just mean - you are strong enough to get through this, and when you can't do it on your own, you have me and your mother, and Callie and Sofia. We all love you, Arizona. You aren't in this alone."

"You aren't disappointed in me?" she meekly asked, her voice sounding small and almost childlike.

"Disappointed?" Daniel questioned, clearly confused. "Arizona, how could I possibly be disappointed in you?"

"I. . .I'm not who you raised me to be. Not anymore. I'm not a good man in a storm, and I can't protect the things I love. I feel so useless sometimes, and I'm so afraid that I've let you and everyone else down," Arizona finally admitted, her voice strained as she struggled to combat the tears that threatened to fall.

"Oh, Arizona," Daniel warmly stated as he uncharacteristically gathered her into his arms. "You haven't let anyone down, and no one is disappointed in you."

With these words and the simple gesture of his loving embrace, the damn broke as the tears flowed from her eyes.

"You're right; you're not the person I raised you to be. You're so much better than that person – I just wish you could see that like everyone else does."

Arizona clung to her father, unable to let go. She wasn't sure of the last time he had shown such outward affection and, for the moment, it felt wonderful to be able to relax in his arms.

But, soon feeling embarrassed about her sudden display of emotions, Arizona pulled away, turning her head as she wiped her eyes. "I. . .I'm sorry."

"Please stop apologizing," Daniel insisted. "I fear that I've misguided you, Arizona. I raised you to be strong and honorable – not a robot. Please don't ever be sorry for being who you are. Because, the Arizona Robbins I know and love is a really, really lovely person, and I'm proud to call her my daughter."

Arizona was unable to stop the dimpled smile that broke through her tears. "Thank you, Dad," she sheepishly replied as she gave him another quick hug. "I'm really proud to _be_ your daughter.

* * *

The next two days disappeared in a flurry of grocery shopping, baking, and meal preparation as Callie and Barbara set about organizing a meal that once presented on the antique dining room table, could have elegantly graced the cover of a magazine.

"This looks amazing," Arizona stated with a quick wink in Callie's direction. And, grabbing her fork, she brought a bite of green beans toward her mouth, but halted suddenly when she heard her wife nervously clear her throat.

"Umm, would you mind if I said grace?" Callie hesitantly asked as she self-consciously looked around the table at the faces staring back at her.

"Of course not, dear. I think that would be lovely," Barbara earnestly replied. "Fork down, Arizona."

Joining hands, the family bowed their heads.

"Dear God, I. . ._we_ have a lot to be thankful for today. You have given us so much, and we are richly blessed. We confess our thanks to you on this day, because there could be not just one, but two empty places at our table right now, and for that, we are sincerely grateful and forever indebted to you."

Arizona slowly opened her eyes, curiously looking toward her wife.

"Lord, we know that you use difficulties and struggles to draw us closer to you and to each other. Through this, you help us understand and remember what we have lost but, more importantly, you encourage us to cherish and appreciate what we have gained.

And so, we thank you for all your blessings great and small. We thank you for being with us during all of our joys and all of our sorrows, for your comfort in our times of sadness and your guidance in our times of need. Thank you, Lord, for sending us grace during the most difficult times in of lives and for guiding us through the darkness and into the light."

Arizona was unable to stop the lone tear that escaped her eye when she felt Callie grip her hand more firmly. And, once again closing her eyes, Arizona bowed her head as her wife continued.

"Today, Lord, I thank you for Arizona and for Sofia and for the family we have gathered here. May we open our hearts to your love and live this day and every day conscious of all that has been given to us. Amen."

Dropping their joined hands, Arizona quickly wiped her eyes as Callie sheepishly glanced toward her.

Leaning over in her chair, Callie gently kissed her cheek, nuzzling her nose against Arizona's ear. "I love you," she whispered.

Pulling back from her wife, Arizona stared into her deep brown soulful eyes. "I love you, too."

* * *

"What? Wait! Where are you three going?" Arizona demanded, as she followed her mother and wife, who was carrying Sofia, down the stairs the following morning.

"Just a little girl time, sweetheart," Barbara stated as she helped Sofia into her coat.

"Well what does that make me, then?" Arizona huffed.

Callie stepped toward her, taking her hands into her own. "It makes you an amazingly beautiful woman who deserves a day of relaxation. Just rest, sweetie. We have a few errands to run, and then we'll be back before you know it. Okay?"

"Just give me twenty minutes, Calliope. I can be ready. . ."

"Not today, babe," Callie insisted as she slipped her arms into her leather jacket. "Just stay here, have some leftovers, watch football with your dad, or read a book. Relax. Or do whatever else the smart people who aren't out and about on Black Friday do."

"You're going shopping?" Arizona questioned in shock. "Today? On Black Friday? The busiest shopping day of the year?"

"I didn't say that," Callie countered with a smile, checking her purse to make sure she had everything she needed.

"Come on, Callie," Barbara happily urged, already halfway out the door with Sofia in her arms. "You've said too much already, and she'll just keep badgering you if we don't hurry up and leave now."

"Mother!" Arizona warned, but she had already disappeared out the door with Sofia in tow.

"It's just a few hours, okay," Callie stated, a large smile on her face. "There's a pot of coffee waiting for you, and your dad's going to make you breakfast. We'll be right back. I promise."

"I know you're up to something, Calliope."

"I know you know I'm up to something," Callie admitted.

Arizona rolled her eyes. "I'm calling the police or-or the Marines if you're not back by like two o'clock."

Callie glanced toward a clock on the wall. "Okay," she sighed. "Fair enough."

Leaning forward, Callie pecked at Arizona's lips for a chaste goodbye kiss, but was surprised when hands snaked their way into the hair at the back of her head to return her endearment with greater fervor.

"Not gonna work," Callie breathlessly teased when she was finally able to pull away.

"But, you said it's girl time. I'm a girl, too, Calliope," Arizona whined.

Callie bit her bottom lip, desperately trying to keep from laughing at her petulant looking wife. "I _know_ you're a girl, sweetie. Trust me, it's one of the reasons I love you so much," she provocatively teased, seductively wagging her eyebrows up and down.

Arizona rolled her eyes at Callie's teasing. "Fine!" she finally relented. "Two o'clock, or I'm calling out the dogs."

Callie smiled as she pecked Arizona's lips one last time. "I love you," she stated with a wink, before gathering her belongings and quickly exiting the door.

As she watched the love of her life happily slip out the door, Arizona couldn't help the smile that dominated her face. It had been such a long time since their relationship had felt this carefree and easy.

Callie's Thanksgiving Prayer had only served to drive home how incredibly lucky she was to be alive and how lucky she was to be able to come home to her family. The past several months had been Hell on Earth, but she finally felt like they were stepping out of the darkness and into the light.

The talk with her father had gone a long way to help begin changing the way she viewed herself in the aftermath of the plane crash. The way Callie admired her, the way her mother held Sofia, and the way her father stood proudly watching them, all just reinforced the fact that she had so much to live for - so much to be thankful for.

And, soon settling onto the plush couch in the center of her parents' living room, steaming cup of coffee in one hand, remote control in the other, Arizona felt for the first time in a very long time that everything really was going to be okay.

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and review.


	14. Chapter 14

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **I know minimal Spanish, so please excuse the errors that I'm sure lie within. This is the longest chapter to this point, but it all goes together, so I didn't want to split it up. I hope you enjoy!

* * *

_**Chapter Fourteen**_

* * *

_Tick tock, Calliope. 1:53pm._

**Seriously, Arizona?**

_Well, these football games are boring. I've already had 2 pieces of pecan pie. Dad is no fun. I miss my girls._

Callie smiled as she read the last text message, familiar, but recently absent butterflies, dancing inside of her. And, fighting to hide the cheesy grin that broke out on her face as she loaded the last of the day's purchases into the back of Barbara's car, she then leaned against the car to type out her reply.

**Are you sure you're ready for us to come home? You think you're up for what I have in store for you, Dr. Robbins?**

_We are NOT having sex in my parents' house with Sofia sleeping in the same room._

Callie chuckled as she moved around the car, sliding into the passenger's seat. Grinning brightly, her thumbs moved effortlessly across the touch screen of her phone, secretly pleased that her wife's mind automatically jumped to sex.

**You weren't opposed to pushing the limit the other night.**

"Is my daughter sexting you?" Barbara asked with a sly grin as she turned the key in the ignition.

Callie's eyes immediately went wide at the question. "What the. . .I mean wait! What? No!" she stammered, the color rising in her cheeks.

**Your mom wants to know if you're sexting me.**

"It's nothing to be embarrassed about, Callie. You're both extremely beautiful women," Barbara matter-of-factly stated as she navigated the car out of the parking lot.

_What?! What did you say to her?_

**I didn't say anything.**

"She's not sexting me," Callie replied, turning her attention back to her mother-in-law. "She just wants to know when we'll be home. She's getting restless."

_How does she even know what sexting is?_

"Tell her to be patient," Barbara insisted, her right hand motioning toward Callie's phone. "She always has to know what's going on. She's can't stand surprises."

"Tell me about it," Callie mused and, deciding to torture her impatient wife a little for interrupting them with calls and texts for most of the day, Callie smirked as she typed her response.

**I don't know. Maybe she and your dad enjoy a little sexting from time to time.**

_OMG! Did you really have to go there?_

**Did you really have to call and text me all day?**

_Fine. Shutting up._

**Finally.**

Callie shook her head at their childish banter, loving every minute of this carefree text conversation.

"Do you really think she'll like what I have planned?" Callie then asked her mother-in-law, uncertainty quickly creeping into her voice. "I mean, what if she hates it. What if it's not. . ."

"She's going to love it," Barbara insisted, interrupting Callie's nervous rambling.

"I hope so," Callie replied as she looked behind her toward a sleeping Sofia. "I just really need her to know how much she means to me."

"She knows," Barbara replied as she reached over to pat Callie's knee. "It's obvious by the way she looks at you."

Callie stared out ahead of her, recent and not so recent memories flashing like snapshots through her mind. And, after several long moments of reflection, she decided to speak. "It's just. . .we've screwed up so many times," she hesitantly admitted. "We mess up, hurt one another, and then just sweep things under the rug. We don't talk. It's not a good thing, but it's just what we do."

Looking from the road, Barbara understandingly glanced at her daughter-in-law. "Well, then, I think it's time to make a change. Your lives are never going to be the same, Callie. Why not make this change now, too."

Callie smiled at her mother-in-law; it was nice to be able to confide in someone. "Yeah, it's like a whole new beginning for us. We need to. . ."

Callie was interrupted when the phone she still held in her hand began to vibrate. Rolling her eyes, she flicked her thumb across the screen.

_2:12pm. You're late._

"Arizona?" Barbara knowingly asked.

"Arizona," Callie confirmed with a nod of her head.

**Sorry, sweetie. We're running late. It's going to be another hour or two.**

_Just swing by the house and pick me up. I'm ready. I want to go, too._

**It's kind of out of the way to come back to get you.**

_I'm seriously starting to get mad, Calliope! _

**Calm down, killer. We're pulling into the driveway right now.**

* * *

"You're kidding me, right?" Callie groaned from behind Arizona, her hands on either of her wife's arms as she quickly guided her toward the front door. "You complained all day long about wanting to go somewhere, and now you're seriously not going to get into the car?"

"I want to know where we're going," Arizona huffed.

"Well, I'm not telling you where we're going," Callie retorted as she threaded Arizona's arms through the sleeves of her pea coat.

"I'm not great at surprises. I wish I was."

Callie rolled her eyes. "Mmmhmm."

"Just get in the car, Arizona," Daniel insisted as he opened the front door of the house to shoo her out.

"What about Sofia?" Arizona urgently asked.

"I raised two perfectly wonderful children, Arizona," Barbara replied, bouncing Sofia in her arms. "We'll be fine."

"Please just tell me we're not going camping," Arizona pouted. "I hate camping."

"Why the hell would I take you camping?" Callie asked, annoyance creeping into her voice as she guided her wife out the door and onto the front porch. "I already know you hate camping."

"Well, at least let me tell my baby goodbye," Arizona insisted, turning around to regard Sofia who chattered happily with her grandmother.

"Bye bye baby. Momma loves you," Arizona said as she placed a loud smacking kiss on her daughter's cheek

Callie smiled as she did the same on the other side of Sofia's grinning face. "Love you big girl," she cooed before turning her attention back toward her near belligerent wife. "Come on, babe. We've got to go."

Arizona again pouted.

One perfectly manicured eyebrow shot up as Callie stifled a laugh. "Did you just stomp your foot at me?"

Arizona rolled her eyes in reply. "Just tell me where we're going. That's all I ask," she grumbled as Callie opened the passenger's side door of Barbara's car for her wife to slide in. Rolling her eyes, she grabbed the seat belt, fastening it around Arizona's waist. "I can buckle myself, Calliope. I'm not a child."

"Then stop acting like one."

* * *

"You really aren't going to tell me where we're going?" Arizona asked after about fifteen minutes of driving in silence.

"Just relax, Arizona," Callie encouraged from her seat behind the wheel. "We only have about an hour left to go, and then you'll know. Let's talk about something else."

Arizona sighed, a smile gracing her lips. "Okay, Calliope," she relented. "What do you want to talk about?"

Callie glanced toward her wife. "Well, I guess I was just wondering where we go from here."

"What do you mean?" Arizona asked, concern and insecurity evident on her face.

Reaching out to take Arizona's hand, Callie squeezed it reassuringly. "Nothing bad, sweetie. I just mean. . .are you ready to go back to Seattle? Do you want to go back at all? We'll need to go back for Bailey's wedding, but we don't have to stay if you don't want," Callie offered in a rush of words, all the thoughts in her head spewing from her mouth in burst of sentences. "We could relocate. There are tons of hospitals on the East Coast we could look into. You seem to be enjoying the time you're getting to spend with your parents, and Sofia is eating up all of the extra attention."

A smile lit up Arizona's face as she pictured her parents being able to continue spoiling and fawning over Sofia like they had been since their arrival in Rhode Island.

"If you recall correctly, Calliope, I was never ready to _leave_ Seattle," Arizona spoke, her tone teasing.

A loud laugh burst from within Callie's chest. "I do recall," she replied, smirking as she looked from the road toward her wife. "I'm pretty sure getting you into the RV that night gives whole new meaning to _drag her kicking and screaming_."

Callie and Arizona shared a laugh at the memory and, reaching her left hand toward her wife, Arizona gently stroked the top of the Brunette's thigh.

"It's been good, though. _Right_?" Callie asked, sudden uncertainty evident in her voice.

"Are you kidding me?" Arizona incredulously asked. "It's been outstanding," she admitted without hesitation. "I may not have wanted to admit it at the time, Callie, but you were right. I wasn't really ready to go back to work. I rushed things because I just wanted to pretend that everything was the same - that _I_ was the same."

"You _are_ the same, Arizona," Callie softly stated.

"Hmm," Arizona hummed with a slight roll of her eyes. "I'm me - minus a leg and minus some self-confidence, but if you factor in the new onset of nightmares and panic attacks, maybe it all equals out," she sarcastically replied.

"Arizona. . ."

"I'm _better_, Callie. But, I'll never be the _same_," Arizona clarified. "You and I both know that."

Callie was surprised by her wife's candor, but was more amazed by the new found intensity and strength she found in her clear blue eyes. And, smiling slightly, she brought the hand that rested on her thigh toward her mouth to place a gentle kiss against the back of it.

They sat in companionable silence for a few more miles before Arizona once again spoke. "I think I need to go back to Seattle. Not today, but when we're finished with this trip, I want to go back. I don't want to run," she adamantly stated. "It's where I met you. The place we fell in love; the place our daughter was born. It's our home, Callie, and I want to go back."

Callie held Arizona's hand over her heart. "Me, too," she earnestly replied. "I want to go home, too.

* * *

"Oh my God, Calliope!" Arizona squealed as she exited the vehicle. "This is where we're staying?"

"Uh huh," Callie proudly stated, motioning toward their lush surroundings. "Wequassett is the finest resort on Cape Cod."

"It's beautiful," Arizona admitted as she stepped toward her wife. "Thank you," she earnestly stated before leaning forward to briefly brush her lips against the plump ones of her wife.

"For what?" Callie asked, tightly wrapping her arms around Arizona's waist.

Arizona smiled, reveling in her lover's embrace. "For this little getaway. For the entire trip. For. . ._everything_."

Callie returned her wife's smile before leaning forward to peck at her lips. "Come on," she said, quickly pulling away and grabbing garment bags and luggage from the back seat of the car. "We need to get checked in. We have reservations in less than two hours."

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, the two women entered the Round Cove Suite - their home away from home. . .away from home - for the next few days.

"Oh my!" Arizona gasped, as she walked from room to room, taking in the luxurious suite with a spacious parlor, king size bed, walk-in shower, over- sized jacuzzi, and gas fireplace. "Seriously, Calliope," she stated when she walked back into the bedroom where Callie stood, unpacking a few items from their bag. "Are we going to have _any_ money left when we get back to Seattle?"

Callie pursed her lips, appearing to do some number figuring in her head. "Maybe a couple dollars," she teased with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Come on, Callie. I'm not an idiot. I know this is like a thousand dollar a night room, and the RV probably cost like a million dollars."

"Not a million dollars," Callie said with a smile as she briskly escaped into the bathroom with a bag full of toiletries, turning on the water to take a quick shower.

"I'm serious, Calliope."

Stepping back toward her wife, Callie pulled her own shirt over her head. "Look," she began as she reached for the hem of Arizona's shirt. "I paid for the RV with some money from my trust fund, and I figured we'd just sell it when we got back to Seattle, anyway."

Callie pulled Arizona's shirt over her head.

"So, then we can throw whatever money we sell it for back into the trust. No big deal," she murmured into her wife's ear.

Arizona pulled away, not distracted by her wife's seductive advances. "And the room?"

"Stop it, Arizona. You're acting like we're unemployed and living on the street in a cardboard box," Callie insistently admonished. "And besides, Daddy knows the owner," she shrugged as she removed her own bra, nimble fingers moving to the button of her jeans. "So, like I said. . .No. Big. Deal. Please just relax and enjoy yourself."

Arizona sighed, her gaze helplessly dropping to the full breasts in front of her and, subconsciously licking her lips, she reached out for them, only to have her hands quickly batted away.

"Not now," Callie scolded, the wide grin on her face betraying her words. "We've got reservations at this amazing French restaurant, so we need to hurry."

Arizona stuck out her bottom lip, pouting as she removed her own bra. "Can I at least take a shower with you?"

"Do you really have to ask?"

* * *

"You ready to go?" Callie called as she walked back into the bedroom from the parlor, her fingers adjusting the earring in her left ear.

Arizona jumped at the voice, her thoughts a million miles away as she stared at her clothing options laid out on the bed. And, closing her eyes, she shook her head. "Sorry, I just. . .I need a minute. I mean - I'm ready. I just need to decide what to wear," she stammered, unshed tears gathering in her now open eyes.

"Hey, hey, hey. What's wrong?" Callie asked, the concern evident in her voice as she quickly stepped closer to her wife.

"You look really pretty," Arizona whispered, tilting her head to the side.

"Talk to me, sweetie," Callie insisted, taking trembling hands into her own.

Arizona opened her mouth to speak, but paused, unwilling to admit to the thoughts in her head but, studying the careful concern and relentless love reflected in Callie's eyes, she dropped her gaze, unable to look into those magical brown eyes.

"You bought me a dress. I can't wear a dress, Calliope," Arizona dejectedly admitted.

Callie squeezed her wife's hands before stepping closer to the bed. "I didn't buy _only_ a dress," she quickly tried to explain. "I got you this _super hot _pants outfit, too. Because, I thought you might not be ready for a dress, but I didn't want to completely dismiss the idea. So, I went ahead and bought the dress, too. Because, I thought you'd look spectacular in it and because I want you to know that you could be wearing a garbage bag, and I'd still find you breathtaking," Callie honestly replied in a rush to explain.

"But you're wearing a dress, and you look amazing," Arizona countered, her insecurity and anxiety still clear.

"And, _you_ will look amazing in the dress I bought you, too. But, if you decide to wear the pants, you'll look equally as beautiful in them. If it helps, I'll change. I'll wear pants. Just give me a second," Callie stated, scurrying toward the closet to find another option to wear.

"No, wait!" Arizona quickly asserted. "Don't change."

Callie turned back toward her wife from where she stood in the walk-in closet.

"Callie. . ."

Callie nervously cleared her throat. "I didn't get a longer dress because I thought it might. . .trip you up, and I didn't want to just get the pants, because I thought you might think that I'm ashamed of you or something," Callie softly rambled as she sat on the edge of the bed in front of her wife. And, taking the blonde's hands into her own, she looked up into misty blue eyes. "So, I got the dress, too, because it honestly doesn't matter to me, Arizona. I know it's short, but I'm not bothered by your prosthesis. Not at all. And, I need you to understand that."

"But, I am, Calliope," Arizona stated as she sat down beside her. "It still _really_ bothers me. A lot."

"I know it does," Callie gently replied. "And, that's okay."

"Really?"

"Yes, babe," Callie replied as she leaned over to kiss her cheek. "It's _okay_."

Arizona inhaled deeply in an attempt to calm her nerves. "So, I'm going to wear the pants."

"So, you're going to wear the pants," Callie repeated. "And you're going to look stunning."

* * *

"Everything looks amazing," Arizona stated as she continued to peruse her menu. "But, I think we're going to share a bowl of the creole lobster bisque, and then I'll have. . ." she bit her bottom lip, still trying to decide from the list of wonderful options. ". . .the seared cape scallops with corn risotto, and mushroom and corn ravioli."

"And for you Madame?" the waiter asked, turning his attention toward Callie.

"I'm going to have the marinated grilled duck breast, spicy field salad and duck confit."

Callie smiled as she closed her menu. "Oh, and we'll talk a bottle of the Trimbach Clos Ste Hune Riesling."

"Very well," the waiter replied as he took his leave. "The sommelier will bring your wine to the table momentarily."

Both women smiled as the waiter walked away before turning their attention back toward the other. "Excellent choice of outfit tonight, babe," Callie smirked as she took a sip from her water glass, her eyes drifting toward the plunging neck line of the black blouse her wife was wearing.

"Thank you, Calliope," Arizona shyly replied, taking a sip from her own glass.

The wine was soon delivered to their table, followed by their soup, and then their entrées. As they enjoyed their meals, sharing bites from the other's plate, their conversation flowed freely from Sofia and her parents to Bailey's impending nuptials and their eventual return to Seattle Grace Mercy West.

Taking a last bite from her dinner, Arizona smiled as she put down her fork before leaning back in her seat, a contented sigh escaping her lips and, smiling at her wife, she took another sip from her wine glass. "You may have to carry me out of here," Arizona teased. "I'm not sure I'll be able to walk after eating all of that."

Callie smiled, finishing the last of the wine in her glass. "You didn't save room for dessert?" she asked as she offered the wine bottle to her wife, silently asking if she'd like some more.

When Arizona held up her hand, Callie poured the little remaining into her own glass.

"I just assumed I'd be having _you_ for dessert," Arizona seductively whispered as she leaned forward, resting her arms on the table.

Callie blushed slightly as she drank the last of her wine. "Not so fast," she chuckled. "I didn't bring you to the best four star restaurant on Cape Cod for the most delicious French food just to have you rip off my clothes."

Arizona's face broke out into a dimpled grin. "Well then _why_ did you bring me here, Calliope?" she asked as she sat back in her seat.

Callie cleared her throat, suddenly nervous and, moving her chair from across the table to sit closer to her wife, she blew out staggering breath. "I have something. . .to ask you," she haltingly began.

"Oh. . .okay," Arizona replied, her own nerves rising within her, her cheeks suddenly warm.

Callie sighed as she gathered her thoughts. "Over the past few months, I have learned so much. And, sadly, what I realized most of all is that we are our own worst enemy," she nervously began with a slight shake of her head.

Noting the look of confusion on her wife's face, Callie held up a finger. "Wait, there's more," she said with a soft smile. "We've hurt one another so many times and, instead of talking about it - instead of putting the time and energy into actually fixing our problems, we just swept everything under the rug," she honestly continued. "And, I don't want to do that anymore, Arizona. I want to fix things, and I want to start right now."

"Callie. . ."

Callie shook her head, holding her hand up to stop her wife. "I've got this all worked out in my head, Arizona. So, can I please just have a minute?" she softly requested, taking Arizona's hands into her own.

At the blonde's slight nod, Callie steeled herself to continue.

"I want to start by saying that - I know that I've hurt you. So many times, I put. . ._Mark_ before you and, it's taken me a long time to finally understand my actions, but I now know I did that because I was so afraid of being hurt. You have the power to hurt me more than anyone, and you've done that to me, Arizona. You've hurt me, just like I have hurt you."

Callie shook her head at the memories; this wasn't a contest - it wasn't a competition of who had hurt who more, but she wanted to lay this all out. She needed to bare her soul if they were really going to be able to try again.

"But, when you were missing, Arizona, I realized that none of that really mattered. Not anymore. So, I made a vow with God - if He brought you back to me alive and well, then I would somehow make all of that up to you. I promised Him that I would change because you deserve the best, Arizona. You deserve someone who will back you up without limits, let you grow without borders - someone who will love you without end."

"I'm so, so sorry, Calliope," Arizona interrupted, a tear streaking down her face. "I'm sorry for bailing, I'm sorry for Africa, I'm sorry for the things I said to you after my leg. . ."

Arizona trailed off, quickly wiping her eyes. "I was just so hurt and so angry and in so much pain that I said a lot of things that I shouldn't have - a lot of things that I didn't really mean."

"I know," Callie replied with a squeeze of Arizona's hands. "But thank you for saying that," she admitted and, taking another deep breath, she brought one of Arizona's hands to her lips, placing a gentle kiss on the back of it. "Arizona, I'm pretty sure I fell in love with you the moment you kissed me at Joe's. You complete me in every way, and I want to share every moment of my life with you. Life has already offered us so many challenges but - somehow - we've made it here, to this place. _Together_. We were lucky enough to have found each other in the first place, and I promise you, from now on, no matter what, no one in this world will work harder to make you happy than me. No one will cherish you more than I do."

Reaching into her bag, Callie pulled out three manila envelopes and, resting them on her own lap, she continued. "I promise to take care of you, and I will try my damnedest to never make you cry again. I promise to never leave you alone, Arizona, because when I look into your beautiful blue eyes, all I can see is the reflection of the two of us and the life I hope we'll continue to share."

Arizona sat quietly, touched and in awe of the sincere words that had just spilled from her wife's mouth. "Arizona," Callie smiled brightly, gazing lovingly into her wife's eyes. "Will you _legally_ marry me?"

Arizona sighed heavily, her eyes looking toward the ceiling in an attempt to stave off the flood of tears that were threatening to fall. "Yes, Calliope, yes! I would love to legally marry you," she finally answered with a bright smile as she stared back into Callie's soulful eyes.

Callie returned a megawatt smile and exhaled the breath she didn't realize she was holding. And, reaching forward, she offered Arizona the first envelope she held in her hand. "We already have rings, so I thought this would be the best way to show you how committed I am to this - to _you_."

Taking the envelope into her trembling hands, Arizona lifted the flap, pulling what looked like a legal document from within. Glancing from her wife to the words on the top of the paper, Arizona softly gasped when the meaning filtered into her brain.

PETITION FOR SECOND PARENT ADOPTION

"Callie. . ."

"I know you've wanted this piece of paper for a long time, and we always said we were going to do it, but we never actually did," Callie said, searching her wife's face for a reaction. "Mark will always be Sofia's father, and his _absence_ isn't the reason I'm doing this," she needed to explain. "I'm doing this because you're Sofia's mother. She has always been yours, and you deserve to be recognized as such. She's _your_ baby, Arizona, and you're _her_ momma."

A genuine smile lit Arizona's face as she considered her precious little girl. "Thank you," she then stated, her voice barely above a whisper.

"No, thank you," Callie countered. "Because without you, our little girl wouldn't even be here," she said as she leaned forward to gently brush her lips against those of her wife. "The paperwork is all filled out," she stated when she pulled away. "All you have to do is sign, and then we'll meet with the lawyer when we get back to Seattle. They'll send a social worker, and I think there's a hearing, but I'm sure everything will work out."

Arizona stared at her wife in amazement. "Do I even want to know what's in the other two envelopes? Because I don't think anything could top what I'm holding in my hand right now."

Callie grinned brightly. "Well, this one," she murmured as she playfully teased her wife, refusing to let her grab onto the envelope. "Is the paperwork for. . ."

Arizona quickly swiped the envelope from her wife's grasp, tearing into it like a present on Christmas morning.

NOTICE OF INTENTION OF MARRIAGE

"Oh my God," Arizona excitedly breathed out. "You already have the paperwork? What if I had said no?" she teased.

"I had a feeling you wouldn't, so I took a chance," Callie beamed. "And, so - if you want - while we're in Massachusetts, we can apply and then after three days, we can have a small ceremony at Wequassett or just go to the Justice of the Peace," Callie suggested, hoping Arizona would agree.

But, uncertainty quickly set in when Arizona didn't immediately respond.

"Unless you're totally hating the idea. . .which would be okay, too," Callie stammered. "I'll just have to call your parents and cancel the. . ."

"You told my parents?!" Arizona questioned, her voice rising higher than appropriate for their surroundings. "Before you talked to me?"

"I told your mom. Well, actually, she harassed me until I told her. In my defense, though, she's like a damn secret agent specializing in espionage, or something," Callie replied with a frustrated roll of her eyes and, after a moment, it was clear to her that Arizona just wasn't quite ready to commit. "So, you don't want to," she defeated my conceded.

"Of course I do, Calliope," Arizona honestly replied. "I'm just trying to decide if I want to go to the Justice of the Peace or have another ceremony. I was pretty fond of our first wedding."

"Me too," Callie admitted with a shy grin, her mood lifting. "And, well, I hoped you'd say that, so I went ahead and scheduled an appointment with the Justice of the Peace for 5:00pm on Thursday evening."

Arizona was once again stunned by Callie's thoroughly thought out plan. "Is there anything you _didn't_ think of?" she asked, the surprise evident in her voice as she glanced over the paperwork in her hand. "You must have been _really_ sure I'd say yes."

Callie smiled and, leaning forward, she grabbed the second envelope from Arizona's hand. "Before you get too engrossed in all that lovely legal jargon, I have one more envelope for you to open."

"I'm not sure I can handle another envelope," Arizona stated, only half-heartedly teasing.

Truth be told, she was pretty emotionally overwhelmed at this point in their evening. The fact that Callie had taken the lead and orchestrated all of this was fairly mind boggling.

"Okay," Callie relented, a teasing glint in her eye. "I can give it to you some other time. No rush. I'll just get the check," she continued, motioning for the waiter as she moved to place the envelope back in her purse.

"Okay, I changed my mind," Arizona practically squealed as she leaned over, quickly snatching the last envelope before it disappeared into her wife's oversized handbag. "I can probably handle just _one_ more surprise."

"What if I have another surprise planned for you once we get back to the room?" Callie seductively purred as she watched her wife fiddle with the flap of the envelope.

"For _that_, I can make an exception," Arizona cheekily replied before turning her attention back to the item in her hand. And, taking a deep breath, she stared into Callie's twinkling eyes.

"If you're going to open it, then open it," the brunette urged. "I promise, it's not going to jump out and bite you."

Arizona slowly pulled the papers from the envelope until just the top was visible above its opening.

"When we get back to Seattle," Callie began to explain, noting the shocked confusion in her wife's eyes. "I think we should get a house. I contacted the realtor Owen used when he was selling the fire station, and she sent me a list of all the houses in our price range that are within fifteen minutes from the hospital."

Arizona slipped the papers back into their confinement before slowly handing it back to her wife. "Calliope Torres, you're making all of my dreams come true. I don't think this night could get any better," she responded, leaning forward to pull her wife into a tight hug.

"This night is far from over," Callie stated as she returned her wife's embrace. "And trust me," she husked, before gently nipping at the shell of an ivory ear. "It's going to get _so much _better."

* * *

Arizona took Callie's hand into her own as she led them down the hallway toward their suite. And, letting go only long enough for Callie to unlock the door, Arizona then sat her purse down on the dining room table as Callie kicked off her shoes. Turning back toward her wife, Arizona once again took Callie's hand as she abruptly pulled her body against her own.

"Thank you for tonight," Arizona whispered before softly kissing Callie on the cheek.

"You're welcome," Callie simply stated as she pressed a gentle kiss on the side of Arizona's mouth, a tanned hand moving to cup the side of her face.

Arizona gently turned her mouth toward Callie's, their lips fully coming together in a passionate tryst of moist lips and insistent tongues. And, as the kiss intensified, electricity surged through both of their bodies, their want and need increasing with every kiss and every touch as Arizona slipped her hands up Callie's thighs, bunching the short skirt of her dress around her waist.

"No underwear?" Arizona asked in surprise.

"I knew you'd end up tearing them off of me anyway, so I didn't even bother," Callie husked with a smirk as she raised her hands above her head for Arizona to completely remove the dress from her body.

Callie shivered with the change of temperature and the exquisite feeling of Arizona's lips on the sensitive skin covering her clavicle. And, throwing her head back on her shoulders, allowing her wife greater access to her neck, Callie suddenly realized that they hadn't actually made love in almost two weeks – not since the night when Arizona had inadvertently touched Callie intimately with her residual limb.

As Arizona's kisses grew more passionate, Callie's became more passive and, pulling back to look into brown eyes in order to gauge how her wife was feeling, Arizona asked, "You okay?"

Remaining silent, Callie only nodded her response, a wicked grin forming on her face as she pushed aside her insecurities surrounding the night of their last sexual encounter.

Satisfied with that response, Arizona pulled Callie impossibly closer to her, reaching behind the taller woman to unfasten the clasp of her bra before slowly lowering it down her arms and completely off her body. And, tossing it aside, Arizona then gripped Callie's bottom, urgently pressing their centers more firmly together.

Desperate to take control of their lovemaking after everything Callie had done for her this evening, Arizona pressed her wife further into the room, until the edge of the bed met the back of Callie's bare legs. Pushing against strong shoulder, Arizona then fell on top of her wife, kissing her more passionately than before as Callie's back harshly landed on top of the firm mattress.

Forcing Arizona onto her back, Callie felt a fresh wave of excitement wash over her when the plunging neckline of Arizona's top revealed to her a breathtaking cleavage between ample breasts. As she nuzzled her nose and lips against the valley between those glorious breasts, Callie's hands then moved to the hem of Arizona's satin blouse to quickly push it up and over her head.

Leaving a trail of moist, hot kisses down Arizona's body, Callie quickly left the bed to kneel on the floor between her legs in order to make quick work of the button and zipper securing her pants.

After she removed them, along with black lace panties, from her wife's body, Callie paused. "Do you want me to. . ."

"Leave it! Just leave it," came Arizona's breathless reply as she scooted back toward the center of the bed.

Leaving the prosthetic limb attached to Arizona's body, Callie the crawled in between her wife's legs, but was completely taken by surprise when Arizona flipped them over in one fluid motion.

Holding her weight with her hands, Arizona struggled to lift her left leg in order to straddle Callie's right thigh but, finally succeeding, she pressed her right knee against her wife's wanton center, feeling the heat emanating from her core.

Callie bucked her hips, seeking friction against Arizona's leg, desperate for more glorious contact against her throbbing center.

Sensing her need, Arizona shifted slightly, bearing more weight through the metal of her prosthetic knee as she intimately stroked Callie with her right thigh.

Pulling her lips from Callie's pulse point, Arizona studied her face, a smile gracing her lips as she reverently caressed a flawless caramel face with her right hand.

"I love you," Arizona murmured when brown eyes opened, their warmth penetrating to the very depths of her soul. And, giving Callie no time to respond, Arizona then leaned forward for a passionate kiss, anxious to feel her wife's mouth against her own.

Callie's lips immediately parted, a moan escaping as she allowed Arizona's tongue to force itself against her own to begin an intimate dance.

Continuing to stimulate her wife's center with her right thigh as their tongues tangled together, Arizona again shifted her weight, grasping onto Callie's left breast with her right hand.

But, underestimating the amount of weight she was forcing through her prosthetic limb, the knee joint of Arizona's prosthesis suddenly buckled, effectively sending her toppling onto her wife, her nose crashing violently into the side of Callie's head.

"Shit," Arizona groaned as she quickly rolled onto her back, her fingers moving to either side of her nose as searing pain shot through her head, causing her eyes to water.

"Oh my God, Arizona! Are you okay?" Callie practically shouted, her voice rising several octaves.

Arizona immediately jolted upright upon hearing and seeing Callie's concern and, still grasping her nose, she scrambled to the edge of the bed in an attempt to escape her wife.

"Move your hands," Callie insisted, now kneeling next to the blonde. "Let me see your nose."

"I'm fine, Calliope," Arizona insisted, hastily jerking away from her wife's gentle touch. Then abandoning her nose, she reached down to brusquely remove her prosthesis. "I hate this fucking thing!" she yelled as she heaved it across the room, sending it crashing into the coffee table in front of the couch.

"Arizona!" Callie warned, startled by her wife's infuriated actions.

"I despise it, Callie!" Arizona countered, moving further away from the brunette.

Callie reached out to gently touch the smooth skin of her wife's back, above where her bra still remained. "Arizona," she gently began. "You promised you weren't going to run. You promised me you'd talk things through with me."

"There's nothing to talk about," Arizona angrily retorted, her back stiffening at Callie's touch. "I'm nothing but a fucking failure, Callie. A failure who can't even make love her wife the way she wants."

"Are you hearing any complaints from me?" Callie asked, honesty and concern evident in her voice and, moving closer to where Arizona sat on the side of the bed, Callie lovingly stroked her back before unfastening her bra and pulling it off her body. Then kneeling behind her, Callie reached around the blonde's body to grasp her breasts, turgid nipples pressing into the palms of her hands. "I'm so hot for you right now," she seductively husked into Arizona's ear.

"I have no idea how," Arizona huffed, all her insecurities once again overcoming her like a tidal wave. "How can you honestly say that I still turn you on?"

"Look at me, Arizona. Right now," Callie demanded.

Reluctantly turning toward her, Arizona didn't resist when Callie pulled her to lie down next to her and, resting on their sides, facing each other, Callie gently stroked the blonde hair back from where it swooped over Arizona's right eye.

"No more of this, okay?" Callie gently insisted. "I love you and you love me, and none of the rest of it matters," she firmly stated. "Do you remember when you told me that?"

A smile broke through Arizona's insecurities at the memory from the not so distant past.

And, after several long moments of silence, Arizona shook her head, attempting to fortify her nerves.

"Do I really still turn you on?" she meekly asked.

"Of course you still turn me on," Callie honestly replied. "You are so, _so_ beautiful and just the thought of being with you does things to my body that no one else has ever been able to do."

"Tell me," Arizona requested without hesitation, confidence slowly returning to her voice.

"What do you mean? Tell you what?"

"Tell me what you feel. Tell me what I do to your body. Tell me how your body reacts when I touch you."

"You can't see that for yourself?"

"I want. . .no, I _need_ to hear you say it. I need you to tell me exactly what you're feeling," Arizona husked as her mouth tentatively flicked at her wife's turgid right nipple. "Please, Callie. Do this for me. I need you to help me feel desirable again."

Callie didn't immediately respond, unsure of what exactly Arizona wanted her to say.

"Tell me. . ."

"Oh. . .umm. . .I feel your tongue. . ."

"Go on," Arizona urged.

Clearing her throat, Callie felt momentarily demure about voicing exactly what she felt every single time Arizona made love to her. But, settling more comfortably onto her back, Callie vowed to herself that she would do anything and everything Arizona needed her to do - even this.

"It's so warm, and when you flick my nipple - oh God - just like that. . ." Callie began, her cheeks blushing slightly. "And then when you suck on it, I always feel a surge that goes straight from my breast, directly to my. . .clit."

"That sounds like it feels nice," Arizona purred with growing assurance as she glanced up toward her wife before latching on to the other breast.

"It's better than. . .nice. It feels amazing," Callie replied, growing more and more comfortable with this game Arizona needed her to play and, arching her back, she shoved her nipple further into Arizona's hot mouth before she again spoke. "And, when you move from one breast to the other, which I always know you will -"

"_Always_? How do you _always_ know?" Arizona curiously asked before flattening her tongue and swiping it over a taut nipple.

"Because you're type A and very. . .oh God. . .thorough," Callie stammered, her body shivering as Arizona blew cool air over her aching peak.

Callie grasped at the sheets, her body writhing against the bed as Arizona moved further down her aroused form.

"What happens when I do this?" Arizona asked, leaving a trail of hot kisses across Callie's abdomen before dipping her tongue into her navel.

"My heart rate increases, and I'm sure my blood pressure is through the roof," Callie admitted with a grin. "But more importantly, I can already feel how unbelievably wet I am."

Arizona paused, resting her chin on Callie's pubic bone as she lovingly stared up into lusty brown eyes. "I really do all of that to you? Even now?" she hesitantly asked.

"All of that," Callie honestly replied as she laced the fingers of her right hand with those of Arizona's left. "And, so much more."

Encouraged and more than a little aroused by her wife's response, Arizona moved further south, dipping her tongue to lightly graze against a now throbbing bundle of nerves. "So, what about this? What does this do to you?"

Callie dug her heels into the mattress, arching her back as Arizona drove her tongue deeper into the wetness of her folds. "Mmm, Arizona," she moaned, biting her bottom lip as she felt her wife press her legs further apart while her tongue continued to lap at her slick entrance and throbbing clit.

"What does that do to you, Calliope?" Arizona again asked, desperate for a response.

"It makes me hot. So, so hot," Callie managed to get out. "Oh God! Right there, right there," she urged as Arizona relentlessly ran her tongue along glistening folds.

"Does that feel good, baby?" Arizona muttered against the flesh of Callie's center.

"Yes! God, yes!" Callie answered breathlessly. "Jesús, Arizona! Me encanta cuando me jodas con la lengua!"

Arizona couldn't help the pleased grin that spread across her lips upon hearing her wife's scream. "Not fair, Calliope. As hot as that sounded, you know I don't speak Spanish," she softly chuckled. "What did you say?"

Soft moans and anxious short breaths were all that came from Callie's mouth as Arizona lightly licked from the bottom of her opening all the way up to the tip of her clit before forcing her tongue in and out of her opening slowly and deliberately.

"Answer me, Calliope," Arizona demanded.

"I-I said. . .Jesus, Arizona! I love it when you. . .fuck me with your tongue!" Callie stammered, her entire body shivering when Arizona switched the rhythm of her ministrations, her tongue now barely ghosting over her heated skin with the slightest of touches.

"You do?"

"I do," Callie breathed out as she gripped her wife's hand more firmly.

"But what if I do this?" Arizona questioned as she abruptly penetrated her wife's opening with two fingers.

"Arizona!" Callie ground out, her back arching and her head digging into the pillow beneath it. "I-I - all I can think about is how terrific you feel inside me and how much I. . .really need to come."

Callie's mouth hung open, words dying on her lips, moans now all that escaped her as Arizona continued licking and sucking her pulsing member while two deft fingers quickened their pace, driving deeper and harder, again and again.

Callie could barely breathe and was sure if Arizona didn't make her come soon, she was certainly going to die.

"What else? Tell me more," Arizona spoke against her wife's slippery flesh.

"The muscles in my. . .God. . .pelvis and legs are sh-shaking. . ." Callie murmured, determined to continue Arizona's earlier request.

Arizona moaned against Callie's core and, without warning, bit at her sensitive clit, sending sparks of pleasure and pain surging throughout the brunette's entire body.

Callie panted and squirmed in pure bliss, her eyes rolling back in her head when Arizona curled her fingers to stimulate that spot deep inside her.

And, glancing up her wife's writhing body from her position buried between her legs, Arizona noted the flush rapidly changing the color of Callie's breasts, neck, and face, a tell-tale sign that she was undeniably about to come.

"So close," Callie murmured, her hips jerking and lifting uncontrollably. "Please, Arizona! Please-"

Hearing her wife beg, Arizona pushed deeper into her, toying with her engorged clit, circling it, lapping at it, then suckling it, before relentlessly repeating the whole cycle over and over just the way Callie loved.

"I'm gonna to come, Arizona. _You're_ gonna _make me _come!"

As Callie's climax began, she grabbed the hair at the back of Arizona's head with her free hand, forcing her face further into her aching center and, with the added pressure, Callie's eyes soon slammed shut, her hips furiously bucking as an earth shattering orgasm crashed into her.

"Oh, Fuck!" Callie cried out with a deep guttural growl, every muscle in her body going rigid as she came. Hard.

With Callie's body now convulsing and jerking with pleasure, her arousal flowed freely over Arizona's fingers and into her mouth and, as that mouth continued to frantically work over her throbbing flesh, Callie's breath caught in her lungs, her face reddening when she could no longer bear the continued direct stimulation to her clit.

"Breathe," Arizona whispered with husky seductiveness before continuing the ministrations of her tongue, avoiding direct contact with her wife's now sensitive member.

"I can't."

"You can."

"Oh. . .oh my God," Callie groaned in satisfaction as Arizona continued to relentlessly lap at the excessively hot wetness that poured from her entrance.

And, when a second orgasm soon pulsed through her, setting her on fire, Callie's heels dug into the mattress, her body come felt arching off the bed.

"So hot," Arizona murmured into Callie's core.

Callie only panted, desperately trying to fill her lungs with much needed air.

And, finally conceding that her wife could indeed take no more, Arizona remained between those long caramel legs, placing gentle kisses against the insides of Callie's thighs before placing one final kiss against her still erect clit. Then moving up Callie's body, Arizona licked and nipped at her heated skin before settling on her side next to her wife.

"Thank you. Thank you for doing that for me," Arizona breathed against Callie's parted lips. "That was the hottest thing I've ever witnessed."

Callie's eyes remained shut and she swallowed hard, her breath still labored. "Oh my God, Arizona. Those were the most amazing orgasms. _Ever_. I've never come so hard in my life."

Arizona chuckled at her wife's candor, but felt a sense of overwhelming pride surge through her.

Rolling onto her side to face her wife, Callie finally opened her eyes to gaze into the darkened blue ones staring back at her. "I love you," she murmured against moist lips before running her tongue around them, savoring the spicy sweetness of her own essence that lingered on her wife's mouth.

Sucking on Arizona's bottom lip, Callie pulled back, releasing it with a loud pop. Grinning wickedly, she then nuzzled her face against Arizona's ear. "Haces cosas a mi cuerpo que nunca pense que fuesen posibles. Cuando me tocas, mi corazon palpita y mi rodillas se debilitan," she murmured before kissing down her wife's neck, sucking gently as she moved to her other ear. "Tu eres lo mejor que me ha pasado, y quiero ponerte tan caliente y mojada como tu lo haces. Te voy hacer sentir asombrosa."

Arizona shivered, the husky Spanish flowing from her wife's beautiful mouth igniting an inferno inside of her already aroused body. And, throwing her head back as Callie latched onto her nipple, she could barely make words. "Translation, please," she insisted.

Callie beamed, kissing the underside of a full breast. "You do things to my body. . .that I never thought possible," she murmured as she flicked her tongue against the other pebbled nipple. "When you touch me, my heart pounds, and my knees go weak."

Moving down the blonde's taut abdomen, Callie gently nipped a path to the apex of her thighs and, dipping her tongue in to briefly swipe at a hooded member, she then purposely veered off course to lick and kiss the crease of each of her thighs. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. . ."

"Please, Callie. I need you," Arizona moaned, the urgency evident in her voice.

". . .and I want to make you as hot and wet as you make me," Callie continued to translate, the throaty timbre of her voice muffled against the pale skin of her wife's thigh. "I'm going to make you feel amazing."

"Do it now. Make me feel amazing, now," Arizona urgently rambled, her hands grasping at the sheets.

When Callie didn't immediately respect her wishes, Arizona hastily ran her fingers through thick brunette locks, roughly tugging at that dark hair to position her wife's mouth exactly where she needed it.

Moving in closer, Callie pulled Arizona's right leg to rest on her strong shoulder, her tongue immediately darting out to stroke an erect clit as her lips nipped and sucked at tender folds.

"Oh God, Callie. You're driving me crazy," Arizona husked, her hands firmly trapping her wife's face against her drenched core. And, greedily bucking her hips against Callie's mouth and nose, Arizona could feel the beginnings of a mind blowing orgasm already beginning to brew deep in the pit of her stomach. "More, baby! .Just like that!"

Callie simply couldn't get enough; the urgency of Arizona's commands, the force with which she gripped her hair, and the desperation present in the writhing of her hips was enough to make her come all over again - but, more than that, the fact that _she_ was the one causing such rapturous pleasure to stir within her wife, made Callie want to stay in this moment forever.

"You are the sexiest thing I've ever seen," Callie moaned, her tongue thrusting in and out of Arizona's tight opening as her thumb rubbed furious circles over her throbbing clit.

"Baby, don't stop! God, Calliope! Make me come!"

Arizona's strangled cry echoed off the walls of their room, her heel digging into Callie's back as she rode her face.

Sensing the urgency in her wife's movements, Callie doubled her efforts, switching the attention of her lips to suck on Arizona's clit as she plunged two fingers into the slick recesses of her core.

And, as Arizona writhed and moaned in ecstasy, Callie firmly held her hips to the bed as a burst of blinding white light flashed behind the blonde's eyelids.

Arizona cried out incoherently when her orgasm overtook her, waves of pleasure pulsating through her as her body began to convulse and tremor with pure, unadulterated bliss.

Arizona's internal muscles milked Callie's fingers as her hands clawed and painfully tugged at brunette hair and, whimpering and breathing hard, the insides of her thighs held Callie tightly in place, begging the other woman to continuing to licking her up and down - to continue making love to her with her mouth.

But, after several more swipes up the length of her slit, Arizona could simply take no more. "Oh. . .my God! Stop, please. . .I. . .I can't take anymore," she stammered harshly pulling upward on Callie's hair.

Callie chuckled softly as she scurried up the bed, laying a deeply passionate kiss against parted lips. "Te quiero tanto. Gracias por estar. Gracias por venir a mí," Callie softly spoke as she gently caressed Arizona's side. "Nunca seré capaz de tener suficiente de ti."

Arizona smiled as she brushed unruly hair from the perfect skin of her wife's face. "As incredibly hot as it is when you speak Spanish sweet nothings in my ear, you really are going to have to tell me what you're saying. . .preferably in English," she teased.

Callie grinned as she pulled the covers up over their rapidly cooling bodies. "I said. . .I love you so much."

She gently kissed Arizona's lips.

"Thank you for living. Thank you for coming back to me," Callie sincerely continued. "I'll never be able to get enough of you."

Arizona smiled, wrapping her right leg around Callie's hip. "Well, do you have any plans for the foreseeable future?"

"What do you mean?" Callie asked in confusion.

"You said you'd never be able to get enough of me, so I was wondering if you have any pressing appointments or anything in the near future," Arizona stated with a shrug.

"Well, I plan on marrying a hot blonde on Thursday evening, but until then, I don't think I have anything scheduled."

"Great!" Arizona cheered as she rolled on top of her wife. "Because I plan on chaining you to this bed for the rest of your life."

* * *

**AN2: **Also, some legal stuff here that I'm not totally positive of, so please excuse any mistakes with that as well. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I look forward to seeing what you think. Thanks again for taking the time to read and review!


	15. Chapter 15

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Fifteen**_

* * *

Making their way from their suite to the car in order to drive to the courthouse on Thursday afternoon, Callie paused as they walked, her eyes glancing toward the main building of the resort.

"Arizona, look," Callie urged, pointing toward a small group who had gathered on Wequassett's Garden Terrace. "Looks like someone else is getting married today, too," she nostalgically mused, pulling the blonde closer to her and placing a loving kiss against her temple.

"Must be a good day to get married," Arizona teased, tightly wrapping her arm around Callie's waist. And, then glancing down at her watch, she smiled. "We still have some time before we have to meet the Justice of the Peace. You want to have a drink before we go?"

Callie's eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "Why?" she asked with a smirk. "You think I need to be drunk to marry you again?" she jokingly asked as they continued to walk hand-in-hand.

"No," Arizona immediately retorted with a roll of her eyes. "It was just a suggestion. It's no big deal. I just thought it would be nice to sit down, have a glass of wine. . ."

"Arizona?"

Callie halted mid-stride, jolting the unsuspecting blonde to an immediate stop beside her.

"Is. . .is that my dad?" Callie anxiously questioned.

Arizona looked toward the terrace where Callie's eyes were now locked. "Hmm," she noncommittally hummed, further studying the small crowd of people. "It does _kind of_ look like your dad."

"Why is my dad here?" Callie immediately asked, grabbing Arizona's hand and quickly pulling her along behind her.

"Slow down, Callie!" Arizona urged, stumbling slightly at the force and speed with which her wife was dragging her along.

"Sorry. So sorry," Callie replied, only minutely slowing their pace. "But, why would he? I mean - is that really him? I should have known this was too good to be true. Why is everything in my life always a disaster? I really don't want today to be a disaster."

"Callie -" Arizona tried to interject.

"I mean, he knows we're here. Something terrible must have happened. Something must be wrong. Why else would he be here?" Callie anxiously rambled, her mind immediately jumping to sinkholes, crazed gunmen, car accidents, plane crashes, family deaths, or even worse.

"I don't know, Calliope," Arizona drawled out with a mischievous grin. "Why else would he be here?" she repeated. "I can't think of _any other_ reason at all."

As Callie took a closer look at the group gathered on the terrace, she suddenly realized that she recognized not just one, but _all_ of the people standing there - save for one unfamiliar woman.

"Arizona?" Callie whispered, her eyes wide. "What did you do?"

"What?" Arizona coyly replied with a shrug, though a dimpled grin graced her face as she squeezed Callie's hands. "You think you're the only one who can be all romantic and surprise her wife?"

Giving Callie no time to respond, Arizona then leaned forward to brush a soft kiss against full lips and, gently taking the sides of her wife's face into her hands, caressing smooth caramel skin with her thumbs, Arizona stared into those soulful brown depths she cherished and adored.

Callie's gaze faltered, darting from the terrace where their family now stood to land on the bright blue eyes staring back at her. "Arizona. . ."

"I know we agreed that our first wedding was amazing, and I haven't changed my mind about that," Arizona began, watching as unexplained tears formed in her wife's eyes. "We said going to the Justice of the Peace would be fine, and it is - it really, really is. But - this place is _so beautiful_, Calliope. It's gorgeous here, and I just couldn't imagine marrying you in a dark, dusty courthouse, when I could be marrying you right here. So, instead of going to the Justice of the Peace, I brought her to us."

Callie's signature megawatt smile broke out through her tears when the reality of what was happening finally sank in.

"Why are you crying?" Arizona asked, swiping at a lone tear that trailed down her wife's cheek.

"You're just so amazing," Callie honesty replied, pulling her wife in for a tight hug. "And, I love you."

Tilting her head to the side, Arizona laid a brief kiss against her wife's jaw line and, grabbing Callie's hand, she urgently began tugging her closer to the crowd.

"Come on," Arizona insisted. "Sofia has been here for the past hour and, knowing that, and not being able to see her, has been driving me absolutely insane."

Taking a few steps forward to follow her wife, Callie then paused, spinning Arizona around to face her and, after joining their lips in a passionate and literally breathtaking kiss that she hoped would convey all she was feeling - all her hopes, all her dreams, and all the love and adoration she felt for the amazing woman in front of her, Callie then pulled away, lovingly gazing down into stunned cerulean eyes.

"Let's go see our girl."

* * *

"A marriage ceremony represents one of life's greatest commitments and is also a statement of love," the Justice of the Peace announced to the women standing before her and the small group gathered around them. "Arizona. . ."

Arizona cleared her throat, overwhelmed by the gorgeous atmosphere surrounding them, as well as the beauty of the woman standing in front of her.

"Calliope, because of you - I laugh. I smile. I dare to dream. Again. Where there was cold, you brought warmth; where there was darkness, you brought light. I look forward with great joy to spending the rest of my life with you - caring for you, nurturing you, being there for you through all life has for us, and I vow to be true and faithful for as long as we both shall live. Today, I receive you as my partner and love, beside me and apart from me, in laughter and in tears, in sickness and in health, in conflict and in serenity, asking that you be no other than yourself. Loving what I know of you and trusting what I do not."

Arizona smiled through the tears that had begun to well in her eyes as she spoke, her heart clenching as she witnessed all the love she was feeling reflecting back at her from the depths of Callie's magical brown eyes.

"Callie. . ." the Justice of the Peace urged.

Callie squeezed the blonde's hands, the reality of how close she had come to losing this miraculous woman threatening to overcome her. And, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves, she softly began.

"Arizona, from this day forward I promise that I will laugh with you in times of joy and comfort you in times of sorrow. Wherever you go, I'll go; whatever you face, I will face right along with you. And, from this day forward, I pledge to you a life full of giving and of hoping - a life filled with growing and loving. You are my best friend, and I promise to love and respect you always. Today, I receive you as my partner and love, beside me and apart from me, in laughter and in tears, in sickness and in health, in conflict and in serenity, asking that you be no other than yourself. Loving what I know of you and trusting what I do not."

As Callie completed her vows, the Justice of the Peace then took over.

"In all the ways that life may bring, you have vowed your love to each other, and are now ready to confirm that love in the responsibilities of marriage. If so, answer, we are."

"We are," both women happily repeated in unison.

"May I have your rings please," the Justice of the Peace then asked and, taking the bands from Carlos, she continued. "Your rings - by their very shape - are symbols of eternal unity without beginning or end. They are the emblem of the love that exists between you and characterize your devotion to one another. Let them always remind you of the commitments you make, today. Please repeat after me."

"With this ring I promise to grow with you, to build our love. . ."

". . .to speak openly and honestly, to listen to you and. . ."

". . .to love and cherish you for all the days ahead."

"From this day forward, you shall not walk alone. . ."

". . .my heart will be your shelter and. . ."

". . .my arms will be your home."

"With this ring I thee wed."

"Arizona and Callie, by consenting together in lawful wedlock - by the joining of your hands and giving and receiving of rings - and, by the powers vested in me as a Justice of the Peace for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, I now pronounce that you are now married!"

Callie and Arizona were completely unable to stop the cheesy grins that now covered their faces.

"If you wish to seal this marriage with a kiss, you may now do so."

Arizona smirked at her wife. "I don't know, Calliope," she teasingly whispered. "Do you wish to seal this marriage with a kiss?"

Callie leaned closer, reverently grasping the sides of Arizona's face with her hands.

"I do."

* * *

"Thanks for coming, Daddy," Callie stated as she leaned over Carlos' shoulder where he sat in the private dining room Arizona had reserved for a small dinner reception following the wedding.

"I missed your first wedding to that wonderful woman, Calliope," he replied, nodding toward Arizona who sat laughing as she squeezed and kissed Sofia's cheeks.

Callie and Carlos both smiled as he patted his daughter's hands that now rested on his shoulders. "So, when I found out about this wedding, I felt that I'd been given a second chance. And, trust me, I wouldn't have missed this for the world."

Callie smiled as she leaned in to kiss her father's cheek. "It must have been hard to leave Miami on such short notice, though," she noted, stepping around the large table to take the seat next to her wife and daughter.

"It wasn't that short of notice, mija," he innocently replied as he took a sip from his glass of wine. "Barbara called me the day before Thanksgiving to let me know."

The other conversations happening around the table came to a sudden halt, all eyes turning toward the older woman, who at least had the wherewithal to look appropriately contrite.

"What?" Barbara asked, shrugging innocently as her gaze darted from Arizona and Callie to Daniel and then back to Carlos.

"Was I seriously the only one who didn't know about Callie's epic plan?" Arizona asked, a pout forming in her lips.

"Looks like it, sweetie," Callie chuckled, pulling her wife in close in order to place a kiss on her cheek. "But, if it makes you feel any better, you got me good on this wedding ceremony today," she continued as she pulled Sofia from her wife's lap. "Seriously, I was _totally_ surprised."

Arizona grinned, nuzzling Callie's ear with the tip of her nose. "You really liked it?" she softly asked, blue eyes locking with brown as she pulled away.

"Definitely," Callie emphatically replied with a genuine smile before leaning forward to peck at pink lips.

Glancing back toward the rest of their group, Callie then turned her attention toward Barbara. "How'd you get my dad's phone number, anyway?"

Barbara's eyes went comically wide as she regarded her daughter-in-law above the rim of her wine glass. "Google," she casually replied with a shrug as if that was the most obvious answer in the world.

Arizona and Callie exchanged surprised glances as the occupants of the table chuckled out loud, all happy to be present for this special event.

Leaning into her mother's side, Arizona momentarily rested her head against Barbara's shoulder and, then leaning away, she took the older woman's hand into her own, joining them to rest on the top of the table. "Thank you, mom."

"For what, dear?"

With a slight smile, Arizona gave Barbara's hand a gentle squeeze. "For talking to Callie. For being so understanding. For giving me time, but for also pushing me just enough to help me get my crap together."

Nudging Arizona's side with her elbow, proud tears began to brim in the older woman's cerulean eyes. "You may not be that cute little girl with blonde pigtails who used to happily sing her way through my house, but - you're still my daughter, Arizona," Barbara emotionally explained. "And I'm so proud of you, sweetheart. I'm _so_ proud of the beautiful woman you've become. And, no matter what - no matter what happens in your life or in mine - I will always be honored to be your mom."

* * *

After a wonderful gourmet meal of Atlantic Halibut, Butter Braised Lobster, Port Wine Poached Beef Tenderloin, Goat Cheese Soufflé, and Panzanella Salad, the group sat laughing and smiling as they talked about everything from Arizona and Callie's antics as children to the multiple places they had visited while on their cross-country tour.

And, when there was a brief lull in the conversation, Arizona cleared her throat, gently tapping her knife against her glass.

Once all eyes were on her, she once again cleared her throat, softly sighing as a nervous smile graced her face.

"When I was younger and first realized that I liked girls, my brother asked me if that meant I was going to marry a chick."

Arizona chuckled softly, her eyes misting with tears.

"And, when I said yes, he got this big smile. . .and said, _I'm going to dance so hard at your wedding_."

Looking down toward her wife's now trembling hand, Callie immediately grasped it, offering whatever support Arizona needed.

"Tim and I would talk for hours, picturing ourselves marrying beautiful women, getting houses - he wanted children, but I didn't - though, clearly, I've gotten over that," Arizona stated with a laugh before leaning over to place a kiss on Sofia's round cheek, whispering _I_ _love you, baby,_ into her tiny ear.

"But, unfortunately, Tim was taken from this earth way too soon and, as relationships and years came and went, I felt the dream he and I shared slip further and further away."

Arizona paused, glancing around the table.

"At least - until I met Callie."

Arizona smiled, shifting her gaze to look deeply into her wife's gorgeous chocolate orbs.

"When we started dating, I suddenly could see all those dreams - as well as dreams I didn't even know I had, finally coming true. With Calliope, all of my passions came back with more fire and drive than ever before."

Arizona again paused, carefully considering the next part of her speech.

"In a moment of insecurity, I proposed to Callie - and then - drove us directly into the back of a truck." Arizona paused, shaking her head. "Not one of my better moments. I'll admit," she mused, holding tightly to Callie's hand who stared at her with all the love and support in the world.

"We've talked about this, Arizona. It was an accident. No one blames you," Callie softly interjected.

"I know," Arizona replied, her eyes locking with Callie's, her voice soft and full of emotion. "And, I'm not saying that I didn't mean it when I asked," she turned her attention to the rest of their dinner guests. "I was just so scared of losing her that I practically demanded she marry me. It was barely sweet and only borderline romantic. . .and definitely not the kind of proposal Tim and I had always talked about."

"You came back for me, sweetie. You gave up everything you had ever worked for to be with me. You were never going to lose me."

Arizona smiled, squeezing Callie's hand.

"I'm trying to make a speech here, Calliope," Arizona teased, instantly lightening the mood. "Stop interrupting me," she jokingly scolded, leaning over to kiss her wife's cheek.

"I apologize," Callie sheepishly replied. "Carry on."

"In an instant, my entire life changed. When I was sitting in the back of that ambulance with Callie, I saw all of my passions and dreams being torn from my grasp but, somehow, by the grace of God - and thanks to our friends at the hospital - Callie and Sofia both survived. Callie came back to me, Sofia grew and grew, we got married - for the first time - and our life together was amazing. More than amazing, actually. It was awesome. . .spectacular."

Callie leaned over, brushing her lips against her wife's ear. "I'll always come back to you," she earnestly whispered.

Arizona closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of her wife's breath against her ear. "But then, as if we hadn't been through enough already. . ."

Arizona's voice faltered, her emotions getting the better of her.

". . .an airplane I wasn't even supposed to be on, literally fell out of the sky. Sofia lost her daddy, Callie lost her best friend, and I. . .I was thrust into the darkest place I've ever been in my life," Arizona cleared her throat, steeling herself to continue. "Callie and I have been through so much and have had to endure unthinkable circumstances. We've both been forced to make the kind of life altering decisions that no one should ever have to make."

Taking a deep breath, Arizona then reached over to pull Sofia into her lap from where she sat in a high chair.

"You know, people always seem to regret the way things turn out in their lives, but I can honestly say that I do not. I certainly miss my brother, and there will always be a void in our family that Mark used to fill - and, of course, I wish I still had _two_ legs - but, in a way, Calliope and I have gained so much from the terrible tragedies that have plagued our life together. We have the most beautiful little girl, we have grown closer and more understanding of each other, and we have definitely learned not to take _anything_ for granted."

"They say marriage is a partnership, but I actually think it's a little bit more than that. It certainly begins as a partnership but, with each passing day, it evolves and blossoms into something else. That something else is - a sense of unity, quite unlike anything I've ever felt before."

Arizona turned her attention from the others at the table, now focusing on only her wife. "Calliope, almost a year and a half ago, I first pledged my love and commitment to you on our first wedding day, and I'm delighted today - despite all the despair and darkness that has clouded our path - to reaffirm my commitment to you. I promise to love, honor, and comfort you. Forever. I love you more than anything, and I thank you for my life, for being my safe place, and for knowing me best, yet loving me most."

The group sat silently, allowing the sincere flood of words to sink in. And, at that moment, Callie was wholly unable to stop staring into the beautiful blue eyes she loved so very much.

By this point, she and Barbara were both in tears, Carlos and Daniel both sitting quietly, reveling in the strength and determination of the amazing women they had raised.

Clearing his throat, Daniel soon raised his glass. "To family, life, and love," he toasted.

"To family, life, and love."

* * *

Two hours later, Arizona sat cocooned in the warmth of a flannel blanket as she relaxed on a double chaise lounge on the deck of their suite, a roaring fire burning in the outdoor fireplace in front of her.

Looking up when Callie opened the deck door, Arizona smiled as she watched her wife juggle two steaming cups of hot cocoa and an extra blanket as well as a small wrapped box tucked protectively under her arm.

Taking the proffered mug into her hands, Arizona then scooted over just slightly, allowing Callie to nestle as close to her as possible on the lounge.

Momentarily handing her own mug to her wife, Callie spread the extra blanket over their bodies, tucking in the edges to stave off the cool breeze of the brisk November night.

"You warm enough?' Callie asked, taking back her drink.

"I am now," Arizona replied, sipping from her mug. "Mmm, dark chocolate?" she asked, savoring the hot liquid.

"Of course," Callie stated. "Your favorite."

"Mmmhmm."

Arizona smiled, basking in the simplicity of the moment and, after sitting in comfortable silence for a few moments, Arizona leaned her head to rest it on Callie's shoulder. "Should we have kept Sofia, tonight? I missed her so much, but then we let my parents take her again for the night. Are we bad people? Are we bad mommies?"

"No," Callie quickly stated with a soft chuckle. "It's our _wedding night_, Arizona. We'll see her in the morning. We'll make the trip back to your parents' house, and then the three of us will be together and on the road again."

Arizona contentedly smiled, placing a kiss on her wife's sweatshirt covered shoulder. "I think I'm ready," she stated, looking up at Callie.

"Ready for what?" Callie asked, confusion written on her face.

"To go home," Arizona answered. "I think I'm finally ready to go back to Seattle. Ready to go back to work, ready to be myself, ready to continue our life together."

"It's a pretty good life, isn't it?" Callie mused, before briefly capturing the blonde's lips.

"Indeed," Arizona simply replied when she pulled away.

After a few more quiet moments, Callie cleared her throat and then slightly turned to face her wife. "I have something for you," she stated as she took the mug from her wife's hand, setting both of them aside. "A little wedding present."

"Oh no. . .no more gifts, Calliope! The last time you gave me gifts - I ended up with a wife, a baby, and a mortgage," she happily teased, a joyful gleam in her eyes. "I don't think I can handle the responsibility of anything else."

Callie chuckled, enjoying her wife's joking mood. "Why must you wound me so?" she retorted as she grabbed the box she had deposited next to the lounger. "This is something just for you - for no one's eyes but your own - unless of course you'd like to share it with others."

"Oooohhh, kinky!" the blonde cheered. "What is it? Sexy lingerie? A new _toy?_" she rapidly questioned.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Robbins! I'm trying to be sentimental and romantic here, and your dirty mind is stealing my thunder."

Sensing Callie's serious mood, Arizona's smile began to fade. "Oh, sorry," she quickly replied with a shrug.

Handing the box to her wife, Callie watched as she slowly tore off the paper.

"Arizona, you are a wonderful, beautiful, amazing human being, and you have brought so much love and joy into my life. This is just a little something that I hope will remind you of my commitment to you, especially on the days when you aren't feeling so joyful, during the times when you're feeling less than wonderful, and for the nights when you question your beauty and doubt my love."

"Callie," Arizona emotionally began as she gently ran her fingers over the ornate designs etched into the copper colored metal of the small square shaped box she now held in her hands. "What's this?"

Callie sat silently, only motioning toward the item Arizona held tightly in her grasp, urging her wife to raise the lid.

And, following Callie's silent request, Arizona pushed up on the lid, shocked by what she found within. "A stack of post-it notes?" she asked, her brow furrowing in confusion.

Callie took the fresh pad of sticky notes, shuffling through it toward the middle of the stack. "I choose you to be the one with whom I spend my life," she read from the note in front of her. And, shuffling through the stack once again, she stopped at a different post-it. "My hands will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other," Callie read aloud before once again closing the stack of blue sticky notes. "Here," she then insisted. "You try."

Arizona cautiously took the small pad of paper, mimicking her wife's actions as she shuffled through to a new page.

"Whatever you can't do, I will. I'm here, and that's how this works," she read as she ran her fingertip over the familiar scrawl of Callie's handwriting.

Glancing up into deep brown eyes, Arizona happily smiled before excitedly shuffling the pad again. "If you break down, I'll drive out and find you. If you forget my love, I'll try to remind you. I'll stay by you, when it don't come easy."

Callie once again took the stack of post-it notes when Arizona handed them back to her. "One more," she said, as she flipped her thumb across the bottom of the stack to shuffle her way through. "People feel so much better after you help them. Sometimes people feel better just after you walk into the room, because you have got this super magic smile and when you smile at me, everything gets better."

Callie watched as a bright smile curled at the edges of her wife's lips at the distant memory.

"Yep," Callie then replied as she wrapped her arm around her wife's shoulders, drawing her closer to her under the multiple blankets they sat bundled in. "That's _exactly _the smile I'm talking about."

Placing the post-it notes back in their keepsake box, Arizona gently set it to the side. "Did you write something on every page of that note pad?"

"Uh huh," Callie proudly replied. "I just thought - if you're having a bad day - if you ever doubt yourself or my love for you - then you can flip through and find a little inspiration. Some pages are a little more risqué than others, but most of them are just my thoughts and feelings. I know that sometimes I suck at telling you how I really feel and, instead of being honest, I pout and get cranky, and I'm sure I'm unbearable to be around, but lucky for me, you're still here."

"I _am_," Arizona simply admitted.

"It was time for a change. It was time for me to step up and show you how much you really mean to me," Callie earnestly replied. "I'm just sorry it took all of _this_ to make me realize it."

Arizona settled her body further into her wife's embrace. "We both need to be better. Things are different now, Callie, and we've been given a second. . ."

"Third. . ." Callie interrupted, anticipating her wife's next words.

"Actually, if you want to get technical, it's probably like our fourth chance," the blonde reflected. "But, that's not the point. The point is that neither of us is perfect, and we both could stand to be a little more open and honest with each other."

Callie nodded her head, a smile gracing her face. "I think I can do that," she said as she kissed her wife's temple. "Wanna shake on it?" she then asked, extending her right hand.

"Oh, Calliope, please," Arizona scoffed, moving to settle on her wife's lap as she seductively nuzzled her ear. "We're going to do so much _more_ than shake on it."

* * *

"Call us as soon as you stop," Barbara insisted as she hugged Callie goodbye.

"We will," Callie replied, holding tightly to the other woman. "Thank you for _everything_."

"No thanks necessary, sweetheart. I was just doing my job as a mother and a grandma."

Callie smiled as she pulled away. "Give Pop-pop a hug, Sofia," she urged, leaning forward with the toddler secured on her hip so that she could wrap her chubby little arms around his neck.

"Goodbye, big girl," Daniel replied, taking the miniature Latina from her mother's arms. "We'll Skype with you in a couple days."

"Bye bye, Pop-Pop!" Sofia cheered. "Bye, bye, Grammy."

Callie once again took the energetic twenty-month-old into her arms. "Let's go, mija. We'll get you strapped into your car seat."

Then turning from her wife and in-laws, Callie waved one last time as she bounced away, animatedly chatting with Sofia before disappearing into the confines of the RV.

"You have a wonderful family, Arizona," Daniel said as his gaze moved from the RV to his daughter.

"They really are awesome, aren't they?" Arizona mused as she stepped forward to embrace her father. "They're my joy."

"Indeed," Daniel simply replied when Arizona pulled away from him. "We're proud of you, Arizona," he continued when she turned from him to hug her mother.

"Youare _our_ joy, too, you know," Barbara stated with a wink. "Drive safely, okay?" she continued, tears springing to her eyes.

"We will," Arizona replied as she stepped away from her parents.

"Don't forget to call," Daniel called as she turned to leave.

"We won't. I promise," Arizona replied, as she made her way up the stairs of the RV. Then turning, she waved briefly before shutting the door behind her.

"You think they'll be okay?" Barbara asked as they walked back toward the house after watching the RV pull away.

"No," Daniel stated, shaking his head.

Seeing his wife's shocked expression, he smiled slightly. "I _know_ they'll be okay."

Barbara smiled, relieved. "Oh really?" she then teased. "How do you _know_?"

Daniel took her hand into his own as they ascended the stairs to the front porch. "Because our daughter is a good man in a storm, Barbara. And she's _so much more _than who we raised her to be."

* * *

**AN: **Thank you all so much for continuing to read and review. It seems that most people are really liking the additions and deletions to this story, and I apologize for any errors that may still exist. As always, I look forward to seeing what you think about this chapter and the rest that are yet to come. Only four chapters left!


	16. Chapter 16

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Sixteen**_

* * *

_"I know a weenie man. _

_He owns a weenie stand. _

_He sells most anything from hot dogs on down. _

_Oh baby. _

_Someday I'll change his life. _

_I'll be his weenie wife. _

_Hot dog, I love that weenie man. _

_I know a weenie man. He owns a. . ."_

"Arizona!" Callie shouted from her position in the driver's seat of the RV, music still playing throughout the vehicle as the blonde continued to dance with Sofia on her hip. "What the Hell are you singing?"

"Language, Calliope," Arizona immediately scolded.

Callie shook her head, her eyes on the road. "Because the word H - E - L -L is _so much_ worse than singing about loving a _weenie man_," she grumbled, barely loud enough for her wife to hear.

"It's not _my_ fault," Arizona innocently replied. "_You_ are the one who bought this CD for our young, impressionable, sweet little girl to listen to," she coyly retorted. "Remember that? When you were on that _secret_ shopping extravaganza with my mom?"

"Your mother bought it," Callie defensively snapped. "And besides, that CD has over a hundred songs on it but, for some reason, _you_ picked that one? What's wrong with the classics like _Hickory Dickory Dock_ or-or-or _Mary had a Little Lamb_."

"Boring, Calliope," Arizona scoffed, a smug smile curling at her lips as she softly chuckled. "How could I possibly skip past a song called _Weenie Man_? _Someday I'll change my life. I'll be his weenie wife. . ._" she continued to sing.

Callie raised one perfectly manicured eyebrow high into her forehead. "Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds? Especially coming from you?" she teased, a bright smile now gracing her face.

Arizona glanced toward her wife out the corner of her eye. "Ok, fine," she simply conceded with a playful roll of her eyes. "New song, big girl."

Moving her attention from one brown eyed beauty to the other, Arizona looked confused when she realized Callie was pulling the RV over to the side of the road. "Why are we stopping?" she asked, concern written across her face. "Something wrong?"

Without a word in reply, Callie put the vehicle in park, leaving the engine running as she considered the last several days of their trip.

Once leaving Rhode Island, they had decided to make a straight shot across the United States. They had visited several more states including Pennsylvania, Indiana, Nebraska, and Wyoming and, as promised, Callie made sure they completely circumnavigated the entire state of Idaho, adding an extra sixteen hours onto their already arduous journey.

They had been gone for nearly two months but, now, as their trip was quickly coming to an end, Callie found herself feeling more than a little insecure.

Standing from her seat, Callie hesitantly turned toward her wife, grasping an ivory hand to guide Arizona to the couch in the main cabin of the vehicle. And, pulling her down to sit next to her, Callie then pulled Sofia from Arizona's grasp, settling the toddler onto her own lap.

"What's going on, Calliope?" Arizona softly questioned. "You're kind of scaring me."

Callie sighed, her thumb fidgeting with the wedding band on her wife's finger.

"Oh God, you've already decided you want a divorce, haven't you? It's all too much. You realized you can't handle a one-legged wife, a-and a baby, and a. . ."

"Arizona, stop!" Callie immediately insisted, her voice rising to halt her wife's nonsensical tirade. "And please don't _ever _call yourself that _ever_ again," she continued, breathing deeply in an attempt to suppress the guilt she felt for previously using those exact same words.

"It's nothing bad. Well, not really," Callie stated, her brown eyes now reflected in the blue ones staring back at her. "I just wanted you to know that we're only like an hour from home."

Arizona's gaze immediately shot from the concerned look in her wife's eyes to the front windshield of the RV. "Oh," she simply stated. "I, umm. . .I didn't realize we were so close."

Callie gently nodded her head. "Yeah," she nervously replied. "And, I wanted you to know, just in case you've changed your mind," she continued with a sigh. "Because, I want you to want this for you, sweetie. Not for me - not because it's what you think I want. I'm not going anywhere unless you're right there with me. I'm here for you - wherever, whenever - no matter what."

Arizona smiled when Sofia wiggled herself from Callie's embrace, climbing onto the floor to play with the _Busy Ball Popper_ Grammy had also purchased for her.

"I'm ready, Callie. I promise," Arizona earnestly asserted. "It's time to go back. It's time for us to move on with our lives -with our life together. We're so much stronger than when we left."

Callie nodded her head in agreement. "It's amazing what eight weeks on the lam will do for a marriage."

"_On the lam_?" Arizona asked, a smirk on her face. "You make it sound like we ran away."

"Didn't we?" Callie asked with a shrug of her shoulders. "Well, maybe not you, but I know _I_ did. At least, it definitely felt like I was fleeing. After. . ._everything,_ I just couldn't be in Seattle, anymore."

Arizona carefully held Callie's gaze before leaning forward to gently press a reverent kiss against her wife's cheek. "Maybe _I_ should be asking if _you've_ changed _your_ mind about going back," she offered as she barely pulled away. "Are _you_ ready to go home?"

"I am," Callie answered without hesitation, her eyes now glistening with unshed tears. "I'm _so _ready."

Offering her wife a quick wink, Arizona once again leaned forward to briefly peck at plump lips. "Awesome," she replied with a dimpled grin. "You stay here with Sofia. I'll drive the rest of the way."

* * *

"Okay. I lied. I-I'm not ready," Callie stammered, nervously wringing her hands in front of her. "I thought I was, but I - I'm just not. Damn it!" she cursed as they walked through the hallway between apartments 501 and 502. "I should have gotten drunk or something."

"Callie," Arizona tried to soothe. "What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing!" Callie hastily replied. "I'm fine. I'll be fine."

Arizona searched her wife's face, silently watching as the brunette unlocked the door to their apartment.

"You go ahead. Maybe. . .umm, get Sofia ready for bed?" Callie apprehensively suggested. "I'm going to go get as much stuff from the RV as I can."

Arizona didn't say a word as she watched Callie quickly back away from the apartment door before turning to disappear down the hall.

With a heavy sigh, Arizona decided to allow her wife the time she needed to work through whatever she was obviously having such difficulty trying to process.

But, not too much time.

She wouldn't let it go for long.

Because, wasn't that one of their new rules? Hadn't they just agreed to be more open and honest with each other?

* * *

Over an hour later, Callie made her final trip through their apartment door, hands full of Sofia's toys.

"Arizona," she called as she deposited the load onto the floor before closing and locking the door behind her. "Where are you?" she asked as she made her way through the living room and into their bedroom.

Stopping in the doorway, the site before her caused her heart to speed up, a genuine megawatt smile lighting her entire face.

Sitting against the headboard, Arizona hummed softly as she gently stroked the soft hair covering their daughter's head, as the little girl lay sleeping across her momma's lap.

"Hey," Callie softly called when Arizona didn't immediately notice her presence.

Glancing up at the sound of her wife's voice, Arizona smiled as she watched Callie step further into their room.

"Hey," Arizona softly replied before looking back down at Sofia's sleeping face. "She was having trouble sleeping, so I brought her in here with me," she whispered as she continued to lovingly caress dark hair. "I think she's down now, though."

Callie smiled as she stepped closer to the bed. "Come on sweet girl," she whispered as she lifted the sleeping toddler into her arms. And, after assuring that Sofia was indeed down for the count, Callie then placed a kiss on her forehead before grabbing the baby monitor and exiting the bedroom.

* * *

Re-entering her own bedroom ten minutes later, Callie silently changed into her pajamas while Arizona remained sitting up against the headboard, now scrolling down through the listing of houses their new realtor had forwarded to them. And, after finishing her nightly routine in the bathroom, Callie then slipped into bed beside her wife, staring up at the ceiling as she let out a breathy sigh.

"I talked to Owen," Arizona stated into the silence of the room. "I told him we'd be back to work on Monday. He was very happy to hear that."

"So, I still have a job?" Callie sarcastically grumbled.

"Of course you still have a job," Arizona replied, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion. "Why wouldn't you?"

Callie shook her head, her eyes never leaving the plastered ceiling. "When we left, I told him I didn't care about my job. He could fire me if he wanted, but you deserved the time. So, there were no guarantees when we left, but I really didn't care," she hastily admitted, her eyes still locked on the ceiling. "Arizona, I. . ."

"I think we need to move," the blonde quickly interrupted. "I don't think we should wait to get a house. I think we should do it now."

Callie's eyes widened at her wife's outburst, her attention now fully focused on the woman sitting in the bed next to her. "Seriously?"

Arizona gave a resolute nod. "Yes, Calliope," she earnestly replied, looking up from the screen of her tablet. "I feel so lucky to be _here_ with my family, but this place is surrounded by too much negative energy, too much heartbreak - too much sorrow. I used to love it here, but now it's just an apartment. It's not a _home_," she continued as she wound stray locks of brunette hair behind her wife's ear.

"Oh, thank God," Callie breathed out, relief washing over her face as she scrambled from her supine position to sit up next to her wife. "I'm honestly not sure I can stay here for another minute."

"Well, I've never bought a house before, but it is my understanding that it'll probably take longer than a _minute_ to get everything taken care of," Arizona teased causing Callie to playfully roll her eyes.

"But you're right, we need a fresh start and as soon as possible. We need a place free of so many bad memories. A place where we can be a family and play games together and listen to music, follow our own evening routine and eat dinner together at our new dining room table. A place where we can make _new_ memories - _good_ memories. A place where you, Sofia, and I can do all the things that make a house a home."

A bright smile illuminated Callie's face. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you," she excitedly repeated between exaggerated pecks over her wife's face and neck.

Then pressing her lips into Arizona's in a blistering kiss, Callie pressed her front into that of her wife as her hands grasped the sides of and ivory face, forcefully pulling her closer.

Finally tearing herself away for air, Callie pecked her lips briefly one last time. "This place gives me the heebie-jeebies. I don't think I can spend much longer living across the hall from my dead best friend's apartment, let alone survive in _this_ apartment where you and I have spent way too much time accusing and crying. . ."

"Callie-"

"It's okay," Callie hastily interrupted, waving her off. "I was just so sure you'd want to wait. With all the other changes already going on - the wedding, going back to work, Sofia's adoption - I thought you'd want to wait on the house thing."

"Not a chance, Calliope," Arizona insisted, once again turning her attention to the screen of her iPad. "We have a few days before we go back to work, so I thought we could use that time to start looking. In fact, we have an appointment tomorrow at 10:00am with the realtor."

"We do?" Callie asked in surprise.

"Yep," Arizona admitted with a huge, dimpled smile. "Because, I'm totally in love with _this_," she continued as she turned the tablet toward her wife.

Looking down at the screen, Callie's eyes went wide. "Wow!"

"You like it?"

"I love it!"

* * *

"Okay, big girl," Arizona lovingly cooed, as she took a seat beside Sofia at a table in the day care of SGMW. "I know it's going to be a long day, but mommy and I will come have lunch with you, okay?" Arizona offered as she watched Sofia fill a blank piece of paper with purple crayon scribbles. "Then you'll nap and play a little and, before you know it, we'll be back to take you home. Momma will read you a bunch of books, and we can play with whatever toys you want while mommy makes dinner. Then, I'll give you a bath, and we'll play in the bubbles, and. . ."

"You ready to go?" Callie asked when she approached her girls after arranging Sofia's belongings in her cubby.

Receiving no response from her wife, Callie knelt down on the opposite side of their little girl. "Arizona?"

"I can't do this," the blonde finally admitted when she looked over toward her wife.

Taking in the worried look in Arizona's bright blue eyes, Callie reached behind Sofia's back, her right hand gently coming to rest against her wife's shoulder.

"Do you want me to call Owen?" Callie carefully asked, pulling her phone from her lab coat. "I'll text Karev. He can tell that ass Barnett that you won't be in today. I only have three elective surgeries scheduled, so I can. . ."

"No," Arizona stated with a shake of her head. "I'm _ready_ to go back to _work_. I'm just _not ready_ to leave Sofia. We've been together all day every day for the past eight weeks and, now, I don't want to leave her. Can't she just hang out with me in Peds all day?"

Callie smiled sympathetically. "I think you already know the answer to that, sweetie."

Arizona wrinkled her nose in mock disgust. "You're right," she begrudgingly replied with an even more disgusted sigh. "Just one more kiss, though."

"Okay," Callie teasingly sing-songed, leaning in to capture Arizona's lips in a brief kiss.

"Not from you, you goof!" Arizona squealed, swatting Callie's arm.

"Bye-bye, Sof," Arizona said as she placed a big smack on the toddler's cheek.

"Bye bye, momma!" Sofia cheered, her attention still locked on her crayon masterpiece.

"See! She's not even two, and already she doesn't need me," Arizona grumbled with a huff.

Callie chuckled as she too placed a kiss against a chubby tanned cheek. "Dramatic much?" she then asked as she stood, grabbing Arizona's hand to pull her from her seat.

"You sure you're ready for this?" Callie then asked - just one last time.

"Umm, yeah," Arizona hesitantly replied, swallowing hard as she allowed herself one final glance in Sofia's direction. "But, you better get me out of here fast, or I might decide to be a stay-at-home mom."

* * *

"Dr. Robbins, you're back!" Alex Karev said with a smile as he entered her office through its open door.

"I thought you told me you hadn't completely destroyed my department," Arizona immediately harrumphed, looking up from the mountain of paperwork on her desk. "I can't even get into the damn computer."

"You have to create a new password," Alex knowingly replied as he crossed the room, rounding his mentor's desk to look at the screen.

"Yeah, I know," Arizona groaned. "You have to do it in the settings menu, but I can't access the settings menu without a new password," she argued, her voice rising in pitch and in tone as she harshly slammed the keyboard against the wooden desk.

"Here," Alex offered with a smirk. "Let me help."

Blowing out an exasperated breath, Arizona stood from her desk chair, allowing the younger surgeon to take her seat and, sitting in the armchair across from him, she watched as his fingers rapidly moved across the keys. "So, Karev," she began. "Tell me about this new Peds guy."

"Total douche nozzle," came his unceremonious reply. "He tried to ship the orphan program over to UCLA, but I wouldn't let him. He said it didn't fit into his _agenda_ or some crap."

An appreciative smile graced Arizona's lips, the gratitude she felt toward this man, thoroughly apparent on her face. "Thanks, Alex."

Alex merely shrugged. "Yeah, well, I knew _you_ wouldn't let that happen."

Both surgeons sat in momentary silence, neither sure of what exactly to say.

"Umm, here you go," Alex soon replied. "I broke into the settings menu. You should be good to go from there," he continued as he stood from Arizona's chair. "You need help with anything else?"

Returning to her seat behind the desk, Arizona looked toward him, consciously pondering his question. "No, I think I'll be stuck in here for a while," she replied, motioning toward the giant stacks of patient charts cluttering her usually immaculate desk. "If you haven't heard from me in a couple hours, though, send a search party because I may be buried under an avalanche of paperwork."

Alex smirked and, then moving through her office, he turned around to face the blonde surgeon before reaching the door. "Look, the only reason Hopkins wanted me is because you made me something, and I wanted to go because I thought I needed to prove that I was something without you there holding my hand," he rapidly admitted as he watched Arizona look up from her computer screen to acknowledge him. "Most of me thinks you're nuts, but you see something in me. . ."

"You're a good doctor, Karev," Arizona simply stated.

"I'm sorry this happened to you."

"I know."

"I'm sorry I was the one who cut off your leg."

"I'm not," Arizona replied without hesitation, a slight smile curling at her lips. "You saved my life."

"You're not still pissed at me or _whatever_?" he asked, the obvious difference in his mentor from the last time he had seen her becoming more and more apparent.

Arizona sighed. "No, I spent way too long being pissed, and that almost cost me my family _and _my friends. It took me a long time, but I understand the decision Callie made, and since she couldn't be the one to do it, I wouldn't have wanted any other surgeon to be the one. You did a good job, Alex."

"So, we're okay," Alex commented, his words coming out as more of a statement than a question.

Arizona smiled as she stood from her seat. "We're more than _okay_. We're a team. A team who is going to run Mel Barnett out of this hospital, just like we did Robert Stark."

Alex smirked at her response. "You have a plan?"

"Not yet. But I'm working on it."

* * *

"Uh oh, Sof. Momma's shaking her head and has _that _look on her face," Callie said from the doorway of her wife's office hours later. "Someone's in trouble, and I hope it's not one of us."

"Momma!" Sofia squealed as she wiggled in Callie's arms, desperately trying to reach Arizona.

A dimpled grin immediately replaced the scowl that had emerged two hours before and permanently taken up residence on Arizona's face. "Hey! What are you doing here?" she happily exclaimed when she looked up from her computer screen, practically jumping from her seat to greet her girls.

"Oh, I figured you'd get caught up in your work and forget about lunch, so we came to get you," Callie explained, a knowing grin on her face.

"Thank you," Arizona replied as she placed a gentle kiss on her wife's lips before taking the squirming toddler from Callie's arms. "How was your first day back to school, big girl? Did you play with Zola?"

"ZoZo play ball," Sofia happily jabbered.

Callie gently rested her hand at the small of Arizona's back, guiding her out her office door. "Apparently, Zola hit Sofia in the head with a ball, so this one here decided to return the favor."

"Sofia Robbin!" Arizona scolded in mock exasperation as they walked down the hall and toward the elevator. "Did you hit your friend?"

"Play ball!" Sofia cheered.

"She doesn't seem too worried about it," Callie stated with a laugh as she watched Arizona smoosh together Sofia's cheeks with her hand before kissing her forehead.

"Good," Arizona replied. "Because, if the kids are being mean to her, I might have to teach her how to hit hard and hit fast, so she only has to hit once."

"Arizona!" Callie immediately chided. "She's not even two years old!"

"Well, Calliope, it's never too early to teach self-defense."

* * *

Gathering their food onto a tray, Callie paid for their meal before following Arizona, with Sofia secured on her hip, toward an empty table in the cafeteria.

"How has your first day back been, Dr. Robbins?" Callie playfully asked as she spooned a bite of applesauce into Sofia's mouth.

"It's been. . ._good_. So, _so_ busy," Arizona replied as she picked up her cup to drink from the straw. "I talked to Karev-"

Callie eyes nervously glanced from Sofia toward her wife. "Everything okay?" she hesitantly asked.

"Yep," Arizona replied with a happy nod of her head. "_Everything_ is great. Other than the mountain of paperwork on my desk, today has been _awesome_. I can't wait to get back into an OR."

"Well, well, well! The gypsies finally decided to return," Miranda Bailey teased as she approached their table.

Arizona and Callie both smiled as the woman took an empty seat next to them.

"I mean, you two sure do know how to cut it close, don't you. My wedding is in less than two weeks, and you two finally haul your butts back here. You haven't even RSVP'd. It's the least you fools could do since I married your asses."

"Oh, didn't you hear?" Callie countered, grinning at her wife. "That wedding doesn't count anymore. We got _legally_ married in Massachusetts."

Picking up a baby carrot and loudly crunching into it, Miranda pursed her lips in consternation. "Girl, what did I tell you about those _legal _marriages?" she begrudgingly reminisced.

Callie smiled, quickly waving off her short statured friend. "Oh, I'm not worried," she earnestly replied, her attention flitting toward Arizona to stare into those beautiful cerulean eyes. "This one's gonna work."

Returning her wife's mischievous grin, Arizona grazed the toe of her shoe up the inside of Callie's leg.

"Hey, can I sit here?"

Forcing her eyes from where they had landed on Callie's tongue moistened lips, Arizona looked up to see Alex grossly chomping on a mouthful of chips. And, with a slight grimace and a scrunch of her face, Arizona nodded, gesturing toward the empty seat.

"I forgot how disgusting the food is here," the blonde then announced. "I was gonna go for pizza. I don't know why I didn't pull the trigger."

"You want half of my salad?" Callie offered.

"That's not much better."

"Excuse me," another voice spoke from behind Arizona. "I'm Mel Barnett. I don't think we've met."

At that, the table went immediately silent, Callie's big brown eyes wide as her gaze shifted between Arizona and the new Peds Attending, Bailey and Karev exchanging nervous glances as he continued to shovel chips into his already full mouth.

Slowly turning around, Arizona happily stood from her seat. "Arizona Robbins, Peds Surgery," she greeted as perky as ever, extending her right hand to the unfamiliar man.

"I thought that had to be you, Dr. Robbins. Good to meet you," Dr. Barnett said with a smile. "May I join you?"

"Oh-oh, no," Arizona immediately informed with an astonishingly fake smile. "Because, you have single handedly attempted to destroy _my_ department. And, I find that when I look at you I want to hit you with my plastic leg."

Dr. Barnett instantly recoiled. "Excuse me?" he countered, shock written all over his face. "I came here to help when _you_ were unable to fulfill your duties as the head of your department."

"Maybe," Arizona evenly began, the smile still plastered on her face. "But, the fact that you view me as someone who can be bowled over as you attempt to snatch my department right out from under me, well, that makes me mad - like violent. It makes me wanna punch someone. And, you know, I'm the daughter of a Marine, so I was taught to hit as a child. I was taught to hit fast and hit hard, so you only have to hit once. And, now I feel like hitting a person. . .or a wall. No - definitely a person!"

"Have you lost your mind?" Dr. Barnett smugly retorted. "Are you _trying_ to destroy your career?"

"You mess with my kids again, I swear I will grab you by the beard and pull hard," Arizona pushed right on through, her smile fading as she stepped closer to the taller man. "I grew up with the name Arizona; I learned how to play dirty on the playground."

Looking around her, Arizona noticed that not only were the eyes of her lunch mates locked on her, but the eyes of most of the other diners in the cafeteria were now watching her, as well.

"Go," she then urged, shooing the astounded and confused looking man with a resolute slick of her hand. "Run away before I take off my leg."

Scowling at the petite blonde woman in front of him, Dr. Barnett shook his head as he stepped back. "I hate this place," he muttered before walking away.

Quietly sitting back down at the table, Arizona didn't immediately acknowledge the stunned faces of her wife and friends, but instead was content to settle in, taking the spoon from Callie's hand to offer Sofia another bite of applesauce.

"Dude, you're bonkers," Alex finally mused with a shake of his head.

"Yeah," Arizona agreed with a shrug, a slight chuckle escaping her lips. "But, I'm cute."

* * *

"You know, I was so busy today, I didn't even have a chance to ask you about _your_ day," Arizona stated later that night as she handed Callie a glass of red, settling onto the couch beside her wife as she took a sip from her own glass of white.

"Today was - _okay_," Callie replied with a noncommittal shrug. "It was nice being back at work with you -"

"_But_?"

Callie nervously ran her index finger around the rim of her glass. "Sometimes - it's still hard to be there," she hesitantly admitted, exhaling a deep breath. "I mean, I know I never actually _stopped_ working after the plane crash, and I've been in and out of the ORs a million times but, today, it just got to me a little. I had to see a patient in the ICU. . .in the same room where I watched Mark take his last breath."

Callie shook her head, not meeting Arizona's concerned gaze. "Then I had three knee replacements. One of them was in the OR where I screwed up Derek's hand, and the other two were in the OR where. . ." Callie trailed off, but Arizona didn't need her to say more.

Setting her glass on the coffee table in front of them, Arizona carefully took Callie's from her hand before doing the same.

"Come here," Arizona insisted as she pulled Callie into her embrace. "First of all, I know you miss Mark," she stated, her chin resting on her wife's shoulder. "We all do. You don't have to try to hide that from me and, if you need to talk about him, then that's exactly what we'll do," Arizona gently insisted as she pulled back to meet her wife's solemn gaze. "And secondly, you did not _screw up _Derek Shepherd's hand. The surgery just didn't go as well as any of us hoped. He knew the risks, Calliope."

"I never should have attempted that surgery."

"He trusted you, Callie," Arizona immediately countered. "And I'm sure he still does. There's some surgery out there to fix his hand. We just have to find it," she tried to reassure.

Callie wanted to argue, but deep down she knew her own self-loathing would get her nowhere. "You're right," Callie finally conceded with a sigh and a brief nod of her head.

"Umm, yeah! Of course I'm right," Arizona confidently exclaimed and, after a brief pause, she reached up to brush the bangs off of her wife's forehead. "I don't think I ever told you this, but for an entire month after the car accident, I nearly had a panic attack every time I stepped into the OR where Sofia was born. All I could hear once I scrubbed in was the sound of two flat lines on the heart monitors. It took me awhile, but I was finally able to push the terrible visions of losing both of you aside by forcing myself to remember that both of you were alive; your hearts were - _are_ \- still beating."

Callie sighed, squeezing the corners of her eyes with the thumb and middle finger of her left hand. "You and I are way too accident prone," she pointedly stated. "We should probably be bubble wrapped and placed in a padded room."

Arizona chuckled at the thought. "We could be like the boy in the bubble," she teased, hoping to lighten the mood.

Callie returned her wife's grin, desperately trying to force herself back into the carefree spirit they had shared for most of the day. "I'm sorry," she sheepishly stated. "You had such a great day. I'm being silly."

"You're not being silly," Arizona said with a smile. "The fact that you still _need _me after all of this - does a lot for a girl."

Callie quieted one eyebrow at her wife. "Strokes your ego a little, huh?" she teasingly mused.

Arizona only nodded, her bright dimpled smile warming the Latina's heart.

"You know," Callie then seductively added, shifting closer to her wife before maneuvering herself to straddle Arizona's lap. "There are some _other parts_ of you I'd be willing to _stroke. . ."_

"Oh!"

"And look," Callie teased as she palmed both of Arizona's breasts through the royal blue V-neck top she was wearing. "Here are two of my_ favorite_ parts."

Arizona bit her bottom lip when she felt her nipples harden against the fabric of her bra and, throwing her head to the side, her eyes fell shut as she allowed her - obviously wound up wife - access to her neck.

"Oh, I like this part, too," Callie husked into the blonde's ear as her right hand blazed a path from her left breast, down her abdomen, landing between her legs to cup her mound through the yoga pants she was wearing.

Stroking her index, ring, and middle fingers firmly against the length of Arizona's sex, Callie smiled against her neck when she felt her wife's hips press firmly into her hand.

"You're so fucking hot," Callie hissed against Arizona's neck. "I want to-"

The piercing sound of a telephone's ring quickly invaded the living room.

"You have got to be kidding me!" Arizona groaned, her arms flailing in surprise when her cell phone once again let out a ring.

"Let it ring," Callie murmured, moving her lips down her wife's neck to caress an alabaster throat. "They'll call back."

"What if it's important?"

"They'll call back."

Removing her hand from Arizona heated center, Callie moved to the floor, kneeling between her wife's legs as her mouth traveling from the blonde's neck to her chest.

"Seeing you in your scrubs and lab coat again today - mmmm," Callie groaned, licking her own lips. "You made me so _wet_."

_Ring!_

"For God's sake," Arizona shrieked, reaching behind Callie to grab her phone from the coffee table.

"Let it ring," Callie again insisted, her moistened lips moving back up to the prominence of Arizona's jaw.

"He-hello," the blonde answered the phone - slightly breathless.

"_Umm, Robbins? _

"Y-yes?"

"_It's Owen Hunt. Are you okay?"_

"I. . .I'm fine, Owen. What's up?"

Owen cleared his throat on the other end of the line. _"I just wanted to let you know that Dr. Barnett was just in my office."_

"Oh. Okay," Arizona sheepishly replied, her hips now beginning to buck against Callie's face that had somehow found its way between her legs. "Umm. . .is there, Oh! Umm, is there a problem?"

"_Well, there's no problem as long as you're ready to return to full surgical duty tomorrow."_

As Owen spoke, Callie licked and mouthed Arizona's center through the thin fabric of her pants.

"What?!" Arizona shouted, immediately standing from her seat, throwing Callie back against the coffee table in the process. "Why?"

"_Dr. Barnett just turned in his resignation. He said Seattle Grace Mercy West doesn't fit into his agenda."_

"Oh," Arizona replied, a sly smile curling at her lips.

"What's happening?" Callie whispered, picking herself up off the floor to take a seat back on the couch. "Everything okay?"

Arizona waved her off. "I umm. . .yes. I'll be ready tomorrow."

"_Are you sure? I can call Karev and see if he can handle the bulk of the surgeries for a while."_

"No. . .I'm definitely ready."

"_Good. Well then, see me in my office first thing tomorrow morning. I need to discuss with you a few changes that were made while you were away."_

"Will do," Arizona happily replied and, after a brief pause, she added, "Thank you, Owen."

"_No problem," _he replied_. "It's good to have you back, Arizona."_

A super magic smile lit up Arizona's face as she sat close to her wife.

"It's good to be back."

* * *

**AN2: **Just two more chapters and the epilogue left to repost! Thanks so much for continuing to read and for taking the time to review!


	17. Chapter 17

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Well, I was wrong. There are actually TWO chapters left after this one, and then TWO epilogues after that. Happy reading!

* * *

_**Chapter Seventeen**_

* * *

"I'm just going to talk you through this, Dr. Yang," Arizona said from across the OR table where they stood preparing to perform a PDA ligation on the micro preemie lying in front of them. "It's really only about a ten minute surgery."

"Okay, let's begin," Cristina replied, grasping the surgical instruments in both of her hands.

"Okay, make a small transverse incision - just below the left scapula," Arizona expertly began. "Now, go in under the third inner space of the ribs," she continued to instruct. "Be very careful to protect the lung."

"BP is 46 over 30," Cristina stated as she looked up toward the monitor.

"That's okay for a baby this small," Arizona confidently replied. "Now, gently sweep the lung to the side and use the retractors so you can visualize the duct."

"Wow, I've operated on a lot of hearts, but this - this is the tiniest one I've ever seen," Christina apprehensively admitted.

"It's okay," Arizona offered. "Just gently pull the aorta," the older surgeon continued. "Stay clear of the vagus nerve.

"The ductal tissue is so delicate. I'm not sure how you-"

Before Christina could finish her statement, the monitor over Arizona's right shoulder began to alarm.

"Damn it! The PDA ripped," Cristina urgently stated. "It looks like she's in cardiogenic shock."

"Suction," Arizona ordered.

"She's bleeding out," Cristina shouted.

"More suction! 6-0 Prolene," Arizona demanded, squinting her eyes as she looked into the tiny incision before her. "Come on, come on."

"Bradying down to 54!"

"Push Epi and Atropine!"

"What did I do?" Cristina nervously asked. "Did I-"

"No, no. It's fine. Just help me fix it," Arizona urgently replied, visibly shifting her weight. "Come on baby. Don't do this."

Cristina stared across the OR table, noting the concerned glower in the Pediatric Surgeon's eyes and, briefly flashing back to those four horrific days they'd spent in the mountainous wilderness, Cristina suddenly began to panic.

"Melanie, page Dr. Karev!" Christina immediately ordered the circulating nurse.

Arizona's eyes instantly shot up upon hearing Cristina's command. "No!" she countered. "Melanie, do _NOT_ page Dr. Karev. Dr. Yang, I need you to calm down. Just take a moment," she calmly encouraged.

"Melanie, please page Dr. Karev."

"Damn it, Cristina! Would you just listen to me?" Arizona adamantly persisted, looking up again to glare at the younger surgeon. "Start compressions!"

"But, her heart hasn't stopped."

"With preemies we start CPR when the heart rate drops below 60. Now use two fingers and light pressure. Go!"

Cristina immediately followed the senior surgeon's instructions, watching in awe as Arizona continued to suture through the tiny opening on the baby's left side.

"It's okay, Cristina. We've got this. We can fix this," Arizona calmly asserted.

"Still bradycardic, Dr. Robbins," Melanie informed.

"Just, wait," the blonde surgeon insisted. "There. . .got it!" she happily stated, letting out a breath as the monitors suddenly stopped blaring, the baby's vitals finally returning to normal. "Not gonna happen today, baby girl. Not on my watch," she softly spoke to the tiny child in front of her. "And the lung is up, and it looks _awesome_," she continued, pointedly looking at the amazed doctor standing across from her. "5-0 Vicryl."

"Dr. Robbins, I'm. . ." Cristina began, but was interrupted by a buzzing noise coming from the instrument tray behind her.

"Dr. Robbins, your phone is vibrating."

"Who is it, Melanie?" Arizona asked, her voice calm as she began suturing the extremely tiny human lying before her.

"It's Dr. Torres," the circulating nurse replied after looking toward the phone's display.

"Put her on speakerphone, please," Arizona requested.

"Are you checking up on me again, Dr. Torres?" Arizona asked once Melanie had turned on the phone, a smile obvious behind the blonde's surgical mask.

A soft chuckle came through the speaker before Callie's voice filled the operating room. _"Maybe," _she honestly admitted. _"But, really - I just wanted to ask if you want me to wait for you or go ahead and take Sofia home."_

"This is my last surgery, and we're almost finished," Arizona replied, her hands confidently continuing to suture the incision in the child's side. "Go ahead without me. I have a few notes to dictate, and then I'll be home."

_"You sure?" _Callie asked, slight concern evident in her voice. _"We can wait if you're almost ready."_

"I'm sure," Arizona insisted. "I'll see you soon, Dr. Torres," she sarcastically continued.

_"Okay,"_ Callie conceded. "_Love you."_

A slight blush rose to Arizona's cheeks at the sentiment. "Me, too," she replied with a gleam in her eye.

Once the line was disconnected, Cristina again began to speak. "Dr. Robbins, I apologize-"

"Mmmhmm," Arizona hummed, tilting her head to one side, her eyes twinkling brightly from the grin hidden behind her mask. "Don't let the fake leg fool you, . I'm nothing but hardcore," she teased.

Cristina returned her smile from beneath her own surgical mask. "Welcome back, Dr. Robbins," she then stated.

"The same to you, Dr. Yang."

* * *

Two hours later, Arizona tiredly made her way toward the door of the apartment she shared with her wife and daughter and, pushing her key into the lock, she could hear the sound and feel the pulse of music coming from within.

"Callie?"

Entering the main room of the apartment, Arizona soon realized that the music was coming from their bedroom and, after depositing her keys on the stand behind the couch, she then tossed her jacket and bag over the back of it. Now approaching the bedroom, she could hear her wife's voice and the squeals of their daughter over the beat of the music.

"_Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, flow sista! Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, go sista! He met Marmalade down in Old Moulin Rouge. Strutting' her stuff on the street. She said, Hello, hey Joe! You wanna give it a go?"_

The sight before her caused Arizona to softly gasp, shaking her head as a soft giggle escaped her lips.

_"Giuchi giuchi ya ya da da," _Callie sang into a hairbrush. "_Giuchi giuchi ya ya here. Mocha chocolata, ya ya. Creole Lady Marmalade," _she continued, as she sexily moved her boy short clad hips to the beat, a tight t-shirt hugging her upper body, and over-sized sunglasses covering her face.

But, it was more than the vision of her scantily clad wife dancing and singing in their bedroom that made Arizona's heart soar; she couldn't help the laughter that filled her soul at the sight of the miniature Latina also dancing before her.

Sofia held her own hair brush to her mouth as she babbled terribly off key, her bottom only covered by a diaper, pajama top covering her torso, Minnie Mouse sunglasses obscuring her chocolate brown eyes.

"_Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?" _Callie went on, continuing to dance while holding Sofia's hand as the toddler bounced up and down on the bed. _"He sat in her boudoir, while she freshened up. Boy drank all that Magnolia wine. On her black satin sheets, where he started to freak. Giuchi giuchi ya ya da da. Giuchi giuchi ya ya here. Mocha chocolata, ya ya. . ."_

"The songs you choose to expose children to never cease to amaze me," Arizona shouted, her voice barely audible over the pulse of the music.

Callie immediately froze, slowly turning toward the doorway - the megawatt smile that illuminated her face potentially lighting the entire Western Seaboard. "Funny coming from you, _Ms. Weenie Wife_!" she countered with a smirk before hooking her fingers and beckoning her wife to come hither.

Arizona tilted her head to the side, a sexy gleam in her eyes and, stepping forward, she allowed Callie to grasp her right hip with her left hand, as her other hand still supported the exuberant child on the bed.

"Mami silly!" Sofia cheered, jumping up and down as Lil' Kim rapped in the background.

"You're right, big girl. Mami _is _silly," Arizona agreed as she leaned over to tickle the smiling toddler. Straightening back up to face her wife, Arizona then pressed her hips more firmly into those of her wife as she pushed the sunglasses up from Callie's eyes to rest on the top of her head. "And incredibly _hot_," she whispered into Callie's ear before nipping lightly at her earlobe.

Callie removed the sunglasses from her head, placing them over her wife's eyes. "Join us," she grinned before pecking Arizona's lips. "It's our last dance before bedtime."

Arizona nodded in agreement, but sat down on the edge of the bed instead of beginning to dance with them.

"What are you doing? You can't sit down and. . . ."

What Callie saw next caused her to pause in her speech as tears threatened to fill her eyes.

Removing her own shoes, socks, and pants, Arizona carefully stood from her seat, Callie's sunglasses still covering her blue eyes. "Last dance, Sofia. Let's make it count."

"Sing too, momma!" Sofia happily cheered, jumping up and down until she landed in a giggling heap in the middle of the bed.

A sexy gleam filled Arizona's eyes as she looked toward her wife and, grasping black boy short clad hips, she insistently kneaded the flesh of Callie's bottom with her fingers before lightly stroking the exposed skin between the top of her underwear and the hem of her shirt.

"_Touch of her skin feeling silky smooth, color of cafe au lait. Alright! Made the savage beast inside roar until she cried. More-more-more!"_

"You're miraculous," Callie softly stated, interrupting her wife's singing. "Gorgeous. . .amazing. . .and I can't believe you. Are. Mine," she mused, accentuating each of her last words with a peck along Arizona's jawline.

Arizona quickly turned her head, catching Callie completely off guard as she consumed her full lips with her own and, when the blonde decided to remove herself from her wife's inviting mouth, she then pulled the sunglasses from the bridge of her nose to rest on top of her head.

"I saved six tiny human, today. My first day back to a _full_ surgical schedule since the crash, and each and every surgery was a success," Arizona softly informed.

"I'm not surprised," Callie honestly replied as she pulled Arizona closer to her. "You're excellent. _My wife_ is a superstar with a scalpel."

Arizona couldn't help the appreciative smile that consumed her face, her eyes twinkling with delight.

"Sing more, mommy!" Sofia demanded, interrupting their moment.

Both women laughed as Arizona turned to grab both of Sofia's hands, swaying with her from side to side as Callie continued to sing.

"_Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir. Voulez vous coucher avec moi. Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir. Voulez vous coucher avec moi, C'Mon! uh!" _

Arizona turned her attention back toward Callie as the song moved closer to its end. "Once Sofia's in bed," she began with a wicked gleam in her eye. "I _certainly_ want to sleep with you, _ce soir_!"

* * *

Weeks later, Arizona anxiously buzzed between the bedroom and the island in the kitchen, her hair on fire and her thoughts a jumbled mess. "What are you doing?" she hastily snapped, brusquely shoving the bottom of her blouse into the waist of her pants.

"Umm. . .eating breakfast and doing a Sudoku?" Callie mumbled through a mouthful of Cheerios.

"Well, hurry," Arizona demanded as she nervously wound the freshly washed hair at the left side of her face around her ear. "Is. . .is that what you're wearing?" she asked with a scowl as she inspected her wife.

Callie raised her eyebrows as she dropped the spoon into the bowl with a clang before looking down her pajama clad body. "I'm still in my pajamas, Arizona. Of course this isn't what I'm wearing."

"Get dressed, then! Take a shower, fix your hair. . .or-or whatever," Arizona adamantly insisted with a flourish of her hand. "You have to hurry, or we'll be late. I can't even deal with you right now."

Callie's eyes widened, a shocked expression consuming her face as she turned in her seat to face the anxious woman still moving about the kitchen.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey," Callie gently, but firmly spoke as she grabbed Arizona's wrist, forcing the pacing blonde to stop in front of her. "You need to chill out."

Arizona huffed, rolling her eyes and incredulously shaking her head.

"Look, I know that you're worried, but as far as adoptions go, this one seems pretty cut and dry. It's gonna be fine."

Arizona let out an audible sigh, her shoulders visibly slouching. "But, what if they think I'm some kind of thrill seeker who jumps out of airplanes? Or-or what if they think I'm like an obsessive bungee jumper? Someone who dangles from the jaws of life. . .or-or what if they hate me because I like girls?"

Callie's face softened upon hearing her wife's silly, but well-meaning concerns and, pulling the smaller woman in close, she maneuvered the blonde to stand with her legs positioned between her own.

"You're not a skydiver," Callie began, a pointed look on her face. "And, if you are, you should probably stop now because you _clearly_ suck at it," she teased in an attempt to lighten her wife's anxious mood.

Arizona rolled her eyes, turning her head to avert Callie's gaze. "This is important to me, Calliope," she whispered, completely unamused by her wife's attempt at humor.

Callie softly sighed and, gently grasping Arizona's chin, she guided her head so that worried blue eyes cold look nowhere but into her own.

"I know," Callie softly replied. "It's important to me, too. But, this is just the finalization hearing, Arizona, and it isn't for another three hours. We've already been through the home visit and that went great. Sofia is yours, sweetie. They aren't going to say no."

"But what if -"

Callie shook her head. "They're going to say yes," she insisted with a smile as she pulled her wife into her arms. "By the end of today, you're going to have a piece of paper that says what we already knew - Sofia is _yours_."

* * *

"What is it that you do for a living?" the judge asked from the bench in the courtroom.

"I am the Chief of Pediatric Surgery at Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital," Arizona confidently answered from her seat between Callie and their lawyer, Sofia sitting on Miranda Bailey's lap behind them in the courtroom gallery.

Alex Karev, Richard Webber, Meredith Grey, Derek Shepherd, and Zola Grey-Shepherd were also present in the gallery - for not only moral support, but to provide statements on Arizona's behalf if the need were to arise.

"You've been a part of this child's life since April of 2011?"

"Yes, your honor. Since her birth," Arizona stated.

"Since that time, have you done everything you can to provide for this little girl, Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres?"

Callie squeezed her wife's thigh in support.

"Yes sir, I have."

"Are you aware that if the court enters the final decree today, then Sofia becomes your legal responsibility as if she were naturally born to you."

"Yes, I am aware of that."

"Are you prepared to stay the course until she reaches the momentous age of eighteen?"

"_At least_ until then," Arizona replied with a smile.

"Do you believe that this adoption is in Sofia's best interest?"

Arizona looked toward Callie who took her hand into her own before nodding her agreement.

"I do."

"Very well," the judge nodded as he pulled his glasses down the bridge of his nose. "I would like the court to note that according to the petition for second parent adoption filed by Dr. Robbins on December 1st, 2012, Sofia's sole legal parent is Dr. Calliope Torres and that Dr. Torres is such due to the death of this child's other legal parent, Dr. Mark Sloan, on September 27, 2012," the Judge elaborated. "Is the information provided here in this petition accurate to the best of your knowledge, Dr. Robbins?"

Arizona swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and once again squeezed Callie's hand. "Yes, your honor. The information provided to you is accurate."

"Okay, then," he continued as he shuffled the papers before him. "Does anyone have any questions?"

Arizona looked around the small courtroom, noting no evidence of questions from any of its occupants. "No your honor, I don't believe we have any questions," she then informed.

"Thank you, Dr. Robbins."

The Judge nodded with a genuine smile and, clearing his throat, he continued. "Well then, the court finds it has jurisdiction over the subject matter in the party's hearing. The court finds that Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres was born on April 1, 2011 and has been in Dr. Arizona Robbin's custody since that date. The court finds that the sole legal parent, Dr. Calliope Torres - having the authority to consent to the legal adoption - does in fact consent. The petitioner is obviously of good moral character, has the ability to support and educate the child, and raise her in a more than suitable home. The appropriate background checks have been completed, and there are no impediments to the adoption."

The Judge paused as Sofia and Zola began to giggle from where they sat in the gallery. Laughing himself, he said, "The mental and physical condition of the child appear to make her a proper subject for adoption by the petitioner and, without any question, the best interest of the child would be served by the issuance of the Final Decree of Adoption here, today."

Arizona looked toward Callie with a smile, allowing the gravity of this moment to thoroughly sink in.

"No turning back now," Callie whispered into her ear. "You ready?"

"You know it," Arizona softly replied, a dimpled smile on her face.

"Okay, are we ready for the magic words?" the Judge teased.

Arizona happily nodded as Callie took her hand between both of her own.

"It is therefore ordered, adjudged, and decreed that the Final Decree of Adoption is hereby granted, and it is my honor to sign the order right now," he happily announced.

As their friends in the gallery applauded, Arizona let out a huge sigh of relief chuckling softly as Callie cheerfully clapped before pulling her into a tight embrace.

"I told you they wouldn't tell you no," Callie said once they pulled away.

"Oh, don't be smug," Arizona grumbled with a smirk before pecking her wife's lips as she stood from her seat.

Moving toward Bailey to pull Sofia into her arms, Arizona felt lighter than she had in weeks. "Come here, big girl," she happily cooed as she kissed the side of the toddler's face, hugging her tightly to her.

While Arizona happily talked with their friends and colleagues, receiving congratulatory remarks and well wishes, Callie spoke with the lawyer and judge, gathering all of their legal documentation. And, after shaking the Judge's hand and thanking him for his ruling, her cell phone in her jacket pocket began to vibrate. Pulling the device from her pocket, Callie quickly answered it when she saw the number on the display.

"Hello?" she spoke, motioning to Arizona that she was stepping out of the courtroom for some privacy.

Arizona only questioning regarded her wife as she went about bundling Sofia into her coat and hat and, then exiting the courtroom with the group, Arizona scanned the hallway, finding no sign of Callie.

Instantly worried that something was wrong, Arizona said her goodbyes to most of their friends, though Alex and Miranda remained at her sides.

"Where did that wife of yours go?" Miranda asked as they descended the steps of the courthouse, both women scanning the area for any sign of the tall brunette.

"You want me to go check the courthouse, again?" Alex asked as he glanced around him.

"Hey!" Callie called as she quickly bounded down the stairs, a huge smile on her face as tried to catch up to them. "Sorry, I needed to take that phone call."

"Everything okay?" Arizona asked, a confused look written across her face.

"Thanks for your help, guys," Callie said, completely bypassing Arizona's question.

"No problem," Miranda replied as they walked toward the parking lot. "I'm glad everything worked out," she said as she hugged both of them. "I'll see you at work tomorrow," she continued as she unlocked her car door and slid inside.

"I gotta get back to the hospital," Alex said as he stepped toward his own car. "Chunkie Stew has a follow-up in about an hour."

Arizona and Callie both waved goodbye as they continued the short distance to their SUV.

"What's going on, Calliope?" Arizona again asked, her patience wearing thin.

After safely securing Sofia in her car seat, Callie quickly shut the door before grabbing Arizona by the lapels of her coat and pulling her in for a searing kiss.

"Mmmm," Arizona moaned into her wife's hot mouth. "What was that for?" she asked once Callie allowed her to pull away.

"That was the realtor on the phone," the clearly excited brunette answered with a huge smile on her face. "The sellers accepted our offer on the house."

* * *

**AN2: **Thank you all so much for continuing to read and review! It is much appreciated!


	18. Chapter 18

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **This chapter has been changed significantly. As I was re-reading and editing, I found some parts of the original version that I just wasn't very fond of, so those have now been deleted.

* * *

_**Chapter Eighteen**_

* * *

The scooting of furniture across the freshly polished hardwood floors combined with the clatter of dishes and muffled curses in both English and Spanish caught Arizona's attention as she stepped from the bottom of the stairs into the spacious great room of their new home. "Callie?" she called as she entered the kitchen.

"Damn it! Esto es una locura. ¿Por qué los armarios tan alto? La madre que te parió!" Callie mumbled as she dangerously stood on a chair, precariously reaching into the top cabinet in their state-of-the-art kitchen.

"Callie!" Arizona spoke, trying to catch the now belligerent Latina's attention.

"Puta madre! No me gusta la cocina. Tonto del culo!"

"Calliope!"

"Hijo de puta! No puedo encontrar la maldita cosa estoy buscando! Qué Cabrón!"

"Calliope Iphigenia Torres!"

"What!?" Callie spat, swinging herself around on the chair so quickly that she lost her balance, her arms flailing as she tried to catch herself before ultimately tumbling awkwardly to the floor. "Joder!"

"Oh shit!" Arizona cried in shock as she hurried across the room to where her wife currently lay in a heap on the floor. "Are you okay?"

"Do I look okay to you?" Callie shot back, wincing as she grasped her left elbow.

"Don't move!" Arizona insisted. "You may have broken something."

"Don't you think I'd be a better judge of that?" Callie huffed in frustration as she attempted to get up from where she lay sprawled out on the floor.

"At least let me see your arm," Arizona insisted. "Maybe we should get an x-ray."

"You - talking to me - about x-rays and broken bones is rather condescending, you know," Callie muttered with a roll of her eyes.

Certain that this grumpy demeanor was due to some sort of internal struggle on her wife's part and not any fault of her own, Arizona decided to let that snide comment go. "Well, Calliope, you are a _delight_ this evening. Is there something that you'd like to talk about?" she sarcastically asked, a knowing smile on her face.

"Umm. . ." Callie seemed to ponder the question as she stood from the floor but, only shook her head, immediately climbing onto the chair once again. Reaching high onto the shelf, she instantly began to curse again. "Oh my God! I hate this freakin' kitchen!"

"You _love_ this kitchen," Arizona matter-of-factly stated as she held the chair her wife was standing on. "In fact, it's one of the reasons we decided on _this_ house."

"Well. . .then, who unpacked in here? Was it you? No! It was probably Karev, or-or Cristina, because clearly whoever did this has no idea where things are supposed to go. I swear, Sofia could have done a better job."

"_You _unpacked the kitchen, Calliope," Arizona sweetly stated, biting her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle the giggle that threatened to spill forth from her mouth.

Finally reaching the serving trays she'd been searching for, Callie lowered them to the countertop before gingerly stepping from the chair.

"Well, then maybe we should hire a contractor to lower the cabinets. . .because, I'm like ten feet tall, and I can't reach a damn thing in here," Callie huffed before picking up the chair and repositioning it back under the dining room table.

"Callie. . ."

"We already have what's-his-name coming to add that bench in the master bathroom. He can do this, too."

Arizona stepped up behind Callie who now stood with her back to her, the brunette's hands on the countertop supporting her own weight.

"Callie," the blonde tried to soothe as she gently rubbed her wife's back. "What's _really _going on?"

Callie let out a deep breath as she dropped her head forward, her shoulders dejectedly slumping and, then slowly turning around, she took in the concerned look on her wife's face.

"I'm sorry," Callie softly began. "I just want everything to go well tomorrow."

Tipping her head to the side, Arizona adoringly stared at her wife. "It's going to be fine," she tried to assure.

"I don't want it to be_ fine_, Arizona. I want it to be _perfect_," Callie immediately replied, shaking her head as she attempted to gather her thoughts. "This house - it's our new beginning, you know - for you, Sofia, and me. It's like _out with the old and in with the new_, and when our friends get here tomorrow evening for the housewarming or dinner party, or whatever we're calling it, I want them to be impressed."

"This house is _huge_, Calliope. There's no way they _aren't _going to be impressed," Arizona stated, still confused by her wife's morose demeanor. "Most of our friends have already been here, anyway. They helped us move in."

Callie sighed as she moved away from Arizona, crossing the room to sit at the dining room table. "It's not the _house_ \- it's just - _everything_. I'm really out of my element here, Arizona."

Arizona's eyebrows knitted together on confusion. "I've seen pictures of the house you grew up in," she teasingly mused.

"I know, I know. That's not what I mean," Callie began to clarify. "It's just - I break bones for a living. I used to live in the basement of the hospital. When I was a resident, I'd wear last night's eyeliner to work the following day. I didn't give a crap what other people thought. . ."

"That's not true, Calliope."

"Okay, so I _pretended_ I didn't give a crap what other people thought," Callie conceded, suddenly shy in her wife's presence. "I didn't have many friends. Bailey didn't think I was good enough to be chief resident, and she was right. Addison left. Erica left. George died. But then you came along - perfect, sweet, amazing - _you_."

"Callie-"

"Then, people started to view me differently. I was no longer the girl who lived in the basement or married the intern in Vegas. I grew up - but, I _still _kept screwing up. We lived in the off-campus apartment where the burnouts go to buy pot. I was the girl who got knocked up by her best friend and almost died because she didn't wear her freakin' seat belt."

Arizona still found herself lost, despite Callie's heartfelt admission. "All of this over a dinner party with our friends?"

Callie sheepishly shook her head. "I'm just nervous. I want everyone to see that I'm not _that girl _anymore. I want them to see _me_. . ."

Callie trailed off, carefully choosing her words. "I want them to see me the way_ you_ see me."

Arizona's eyes widened, her mind immediately jumping to the various ways she did see her wife. "Incredibly hot? Super sexy?" she seductively asked with a sly grin on her face. "Because, I'm really not okay with our friends picturing you naked, Calliope."

Callie laughed despite her insecurities. "You're _so _bad," she mused.

Arizona softly chuckled and, crossing the room toward her wife, she carefully took a seat on Callie's lap.

"We all have a past. Some things we're proud of and other things - not so much," Arizona earnestly offered, tilting her head to the side, blue eyes locking with brown. "But, that stuff doesn't matter. Not anymore. Because, your past doesn't dictate who you are. It's just a part of who you have and will become. I love you, Calliope. Everyone loves you, and everyone is going to love this house."

Wrapping her arms around Arizona's waist, Callie rested her head against the smaller woman's chest. "There's just so much to do. I don't want to screw it up."

Holding her wife securely in her own embrace, Arizona reverently kissed the top of a brunette head. "We're both off work, tomorrow. You've been cleaning for weeks. We've done all the grocery shopping already, and we have enough liquor, wine, and beer to inebriate a herd of wild elephants," Arizona said with a dimpled grin.

"We're going to need it when Cristina and Meredith get here," Callie replied with a smirk.

Arizona smiled as she kissed her wife's cheek. "I'll keep Sofia occupied while you're cooking, and Bailey said she, Ben, and little Tuck could come early to help with anything we need. It's going to be fi - it's going to be _perfect_."

Looking up into the most sincere blue eyed gaze she had ever seen, Callie began to feel at least some of her fears and insecurities start to fade away. "You really think so?" she still asked, a shade of apprehension creeping into the tone of her voice.

Arizona shook her head in reply. "No, I don't think so - I _know_ so," she proudly informed. "Because Arizona Robbins didn't marry _no_ slouch," she happily teased. "This party is going to be amazing, Calliope - because _you _are amazing."

* * *

The following evening, Miranda Bailey found herself curiously standing outside the bedroom of Callie and Arizona, her hand poised in the air to provide the door with a knock.

"Arizona, are you okay?" Miranda called through the closed bedroom door after receiving a text message from the blonde just moments before. "People are starting to arrive. Callie's wondering where you are," she gently said as she turned the doorknob, her head now peeking through the crack in the door. And, pausing before entering the room completely, she carefully assessed the blonde sitting on the edge of the bed clad in a navy blue silk robe.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know who else to text," Arizona softly replied after a moment's hesitation. "I'm afraid to go out there, and I thought you might be able to help. Somehow you were able to convince Callie to marry me the first time around, and I know that you tricked me into coming to the hospital for that Lemierre's kid, so I was hoping you could say something that will make me want to get off my butt and go out there."

Miranda sighed, a curious look gracing her features. "Oh, Arizona," Miranda gently replied, crossing the room to sit next to her on the edge of the bed. "What's-"

"I only have one leg, Bailey," Arizona matter-of-factly stated in an immediate rush of words. "It took me so long to be able to look at myself and, for the longest time, I hated when Callie looked at me. I Just - I wanted to surprise her. I thought that maybe tonight would be the night. . ."

Arizona trailed off as she stood from her seat, grasping the belt of her robe in her hands as she began to untie it. "I'm not naked under here, so don't look so worried," she nervously joked. "I'm not going to flash you."

"Well, I. . .I didn't think. . ."

Miranda paused in her stuttered response as Arizona pulled the robe from her body, completely taken aback by the confidence the woman in front of her was exuding.

But, interpreting the shorter woman's silence as nothing more than discomfort and disgust, Arizona began to ramble, a blush rising to her cheeks. "It was a stupid idea. I. . .I look ridiculous."

"No!" Miranda immediately responded, quickly stepping toward the blonde to impede her hands that was already attempting to remove the dress. "You and your wife may be used to naked ladies running around, but I'm _not_. You just caught me off guard - and not because of your leg."

Arizona searched the shorter woman's face, notably struggling with this decision.

"You look wonderful," Miranda honestly spoke. "You are a beautiful woman, Arizona Robbins. You could have two legs or no legs, and you'd still be beautiful. You are _fierce_, girl. You have more courage and guts and. . ._swagger_ than any other white person I know."

A loud bark of laughter erupted from within Arizona's chest as she tried mightily to fight back her tears. "Thank you, Bailey," she gratefully replied, inhaling a deep breath before slowly exhaling as she looked herself up and down in the mirror. "I do have _swagger_, don't I?"

Miranda laughed as she reached for Arizona's hand. "Indeed you do, girl. Now, come on," she insisted. "You're about to miss your own party, and I want to be the first person to see the look on Callie's face when she sees you in this dress."

* * *

"Of course we have Tequila," Callie said with a laugh as she stood in the great room talking with Cristina Yang and Meredith Grey. "I knew the two of you were coming."

"Hey, that's not fair, Cal," Cristina scoffed. "We're not the same girls who used to screw boys like whores on Tequila."

"Yeah, we're much more _refined_ these days," Meredith quickly added with a grin as she sipped from her glass of wine.

"Mer's right," Christina replied, quickly throwing back a shot of Tequila. "Sometimes we drink _wine_. Lots of it."

Callie smiled as she mingled with the group of people dispersed throughout the first floor of their home, though her attention was continuously drawn toward the staircase her wife had disappeared up a half hour before. She didn't know what was going on up there, and she didn't want to appear too overprotective, but she really just needed to know that Arizona was okay.

Glancing to where Sofia and Zola were contentedly playing with baby dolls on the couch in the family room, Callie then moved toward the stairs, giving up the battle that waged inside her to patiently remain downstairs.

But, before she could take even two steps, she quickly paused when she _felt_ Arizona's presence coming toward her.

"You look lovely tonight, Arizona," Derek Shepherd said as he moved in the blonde's direction, completely blocking her from Callie's view. "We love the house."

"We do to," Callie heard Arizona happily respond.

Stepping closer to the small group that had now gathered around Arizona, Callie's breath hitched when her wife's body finally came into full view.

"Wow!" she gasped, her own chocolate eyes scanning the length of the blonde's body before locking with the cerulean orbs she adored.

As their guests faded away, Arizona breathed in a steadying breath. "I didn't feel confident enough to wear heels. Not yet, at least. So, I wore flats," she nervously stated, now stepping directly in front of Callie, the rest of their guests once again mingling throughout the house.

"You look - wow - Arizona. You are _stunning_," Callie stammered, the mixture of pride, love, lust, and joy stealing all coherent thought and making it difficult for her to find her voice.

"I wanted to surprise you," Arizona simply stated as she nervously tugged at the short skirt of her dress. "Surprise!"

Callie's eyes once again ogled the blonde's entire body. "Oh God, baby. I'm not going to be able to take my eyes off of you," she honestly admitted without an ounce of shame. "You have no idea how _proud_ I am of you right now and how _honored_ I am to be your wife. I'm so in love with you, Arizona Robbins."

"Sweet talker," Arizona teased, a single tear sliding down her cheek.

Immediately reaching out to brush the dampness from an alabaster cheek, Callie's thumb lingered over Arizona's face. "No tears, sweetie. Not tonight," she lovingly insisted. "Tonight - this house - is our new beginning, remember? We are _so_ finished with the tears."

Arizona nodded as she placed her hands on Callie's hips, pulling her body flush against her own. "I really want to kiss you right now," Arizona whispered against a tanned ear.

Smiling sexily, Callie ran her own tongue along the shell of Arizona's ear and, blowing cool air over the now damp cartilage, she then kissed the sensitive skin along an ivory jawline. "_I_ really want to rip off your clothes and make you scream my name _right now_," she husked into her ear. "But, I guess I'll settle for a kiss."

* * *

"Hey, Dr. Robbins," Tuck said as he climbed onto the sofa, scooting close to her as she sat animatedly speaking with April Kepner, Jackson Avery, and Owen Hunt.

Immediately turning her attention toward the sound of her name, Arizona happily looked down at the child, smiling brightly as she wrapped an arm around his back. "Hey, Tuck. Are you having fun?"

Taking a sip from the juice box held in his hand, Tuck noncommittally shrugged. "It's okay, I guess," he honestly replied, fiddling with the straw with the tip of his tongue. "Dr. Robbins?" he then inquired after a moment.

"Yes, Tuck?" Arizona cheerfully responded.

"Why does your leg look like that?" he inquisitively asked as only a child could. "Did your real leg break off?"

Arizona paused, her smile faltering momentarily. "Umm. . .well-"

"William George Bailey Jones!" Miranda scolded, stepping closer to her son when she heard him ask the question. "Boy, that's enough. You know better than that. Apologize to Dr. Robbins. Right now!"

The room immediately went silent upon hearing Miranda's raised voice, all eyes turning toward a surprised blonde, a furious Miranda Bailey, and clearly confused little boy.

Arizona cleared her throat, valiantly swallowing against the lump that began to form. "I. . .it's - it's okay," she stammered as she quickly glanced around the room, taking a deep breath before letting it out slowly. And, tilting her head to the side, she pursed her lips, pondering the best way to answer such a candid question. "Tuck, do you know how when you're sick - sometimes your mommy brings you to see me or Dr. Karev, and we give you medicine to make you feel better?"

Tuck nodded his understanding, his attention fully on the woman sitting beside him.

"Well, I hurt my leg really, _really_ badly a few months ago, and it made me very sick. I took medicine, just like you do when you're sick, but the medicine didn't make me feel better."

"Will my leg fall off the next time I get sick?"

Arizona smiled at the question, gently shaking her head. "No. . .it won't," she simply stated, turning her attention from him when she felt a hand on her shoulder. And, glancing upward at the touch, Arizona noted the concerned look in her wife's eyes, smiling as she reached up to squeeze the hand protectively resting on her shoulder. "Your mommy and daddy, and Ben love you _so_ much that when you're sick, they'll do anything to make you feel better, right?"

Tuck rapidly nodded his head. "Yep. Sometimes daddy makes chicken noodle soup for me, and mommy always holds me and sings to me. Ben likes to play with dinosaurs. T-Rex always beats Megalosaurus."

Arizona offered the boy a genuine smile. "That's awesome," she happily replied, quickly scanning the room to find all eyes on her.

"You know Dr. Torres, right?" Arizona then asked the little boy as Callie took the seat on the couch on the opposite side of him.

"Geez, Dr. Robbins. Of course I know her. She's right here," Tuck replied in disbelief, leaning his body into Callie. "She's Sofia's other mommy."

"That's exactly right," Arizona said, chuckling softly as she locked eyes with the woman in question. "Well, Dr. Torres loves _me_, just like your mommy and daddy and Ben love _you_. And, when I was sick, she did everything she could to make me feel better, just like your family does for you. My old leg was hurt, though, and it was making me sick, so the only thing Dr. Torres could do to make me feel better was get rid of the hurt leg so that I could get a new one."

They sat in silence for a moment, Tuck clearly pondering the story he was just told.

"Does that make sense? Do you understand?" Arizona asked.

"Yeah, I think so," the boy replied, content with his new knowledge as he hopped down from the sofa to join Sofia and Zola on the floor where they sat playing with _Mega Blocks._

Once her son was out of earshot, Miranda stepped closer to Arizona. "I'm so sorry," she earnestly whispered.

"It's fine Bailey," Arizona countered, waving off the worried other woman. "He's just curious. That's a _good_ thing."

Miranda rolled her eyes and leaned against the arm of the couch as Arizona grabbed Callie's hand and settled into the warmth of her body.

And, as Miranda, Arizona, and Callie watched the children play, they heard Tuck excitedly speak.

"Sofia," he excitedly spoke as he helped the little girl connect two of the blocks. "Your mom's leg is_ so cool_!"

* * *

Two hours later, after they had enjoyed a lovely meal, excellent conversation and, for some, quite a bit of alcohol, Arizona continued to chat with their friends while Callie leaned against the bar in the kitchen, sipping her wine.

"We're leaving soon," Miranda said, startling Callie as she approached her. "Little Tuck turns into a bear when he doesn't get enough sleep. Can we help you with anything before we head out?"

Callie shook her head, smiling with gratitude. "I don't think so. We'll be fine."

Continuing to watch her friend, Miranda regarded the taller woman with genuine concern written across her features. "Callie, are you okay? You've been. . .quiet this evening," she reluctantly asked.

Glancing down at the short statured woman as if she'd just been caught with her hand in the cookie jar, Callie merely shook her head. "I'm good," she honestly replied. "Better than good, actually. I'm _awesome_ \- or any of the other adjectives my wife loves to use," she joked. "I'm just giving myself a moment to take this all in."

Miranda quietly, not wanting to interrupt Callie's moment but, remembering a conversation they'd had years before, she perked up as she began to speak. "You finally found your something," she softly reminisced. "Your wife and your daughter are what make you bounce up and down."

Callie chuckled, her mind immediately jumping to the past. "Yeah, they really are," she admitted with a grin. "I think we're really going to be happy here. It was _so_ time for a change."

"Change is good," Miranda agreed. "Amazing things can happen to a person when they decide to grab life by the reins and take control of it - instead of just sitting back and watching it happen. Life doesn't stop for anyone, Callie. We all have to change and adjust."

Callie smiled, fondly looking toward her friend. "Thank you, Bailey. You've always been so supportive of Arizona and me."

Miranda rolled her eyes, waving Callie off with a sigh. "Stop doing that thing. You know I don't do personal business."

"Uh-huh," Callie mused before taking a sip of her wine.

Miranda laughed, patting Callie on the arm. "I'm just glad the little bird decided to spread her wings and fly."

Callie chuckled, remembering the first night she saw Arizona enter the hospital after so many months of pain and suffering – just a couple weeks before they had embarked on their cross-country adventure of recovery, healing, and reconnection.

"I should get back to the. . ." Callie paused, her words interrupted by the sound of her wife's adorable laughter and, seeking out the voice that never failed to lighten even her darkest moods, Callie couldn't help the enormous grin that spread across her face.

Watching from across the room, Callie's heart nearly stilled when she saw Arizona standing with a wine glass in her hand, her head thrown back as she animatedly laughed with Cristina while Karev stood smirking beside them. Taking in the glimmer of those bright blue eyes, the confidence in her posture, and the comfort of her every movement, Callie was sure that _this_ was the most relaxed - and happy - she had seen Arizona in months.

So many times over the last eight months, Callie wondered if they would ever reach this place again. She worried that she and Arizona would never be able to simply enjoy themselves as they previously had but, most of all, as she would often lay awake at night, she feared that she would never again hear the infectious sound of her wife's laughter or witness her radiate the sheer confidence and quiet strength that she was at this very moment.

But - here they stood - in their new home, surrounded by their friends, both feeling happier than they had in a very long time. Callie had prayed so many times to God or anyone who would listen that someday this moment would come and, after so much heartache, she knew without a doubt that they were finally there.

They had finally reached the place they both so desperately wanted to be.

Never in her wildest dreams did Callie think her harebrained idea - to buy a big ass RV and then drive the thing all the way across the country and back again - would lead to this moment. The moment when she would be standing in her new home watching her _new_ wife heartily laughing as some of the most important people in their lives filled their home with so much love and joy.

They had been through so much, and Callie knew if she could go back in time and somehow erase the day Arizona stopped laughing from the course of their history, she would do it in an instant. If she could, she would transport herself back to the pit where she had watched in surprise as her wife called Alex Karev a miserable, miserable bastard and an ungrateful crap dog. If she could, she would try her damnedest to make the stubborn woman change her mind. She would insist she remember her fear of flying and force her to stay instead.

Because, that day was worse than any other they had experienced. Worse than Africa, more terrifying than a crazed gunman, and more scarring than traumatic brain injuries and ventricular septal defects.

The scars from this would linger for the rest of their lives, but Callie knew that she would forever be grateful to God - or whoever else had heard her prayers - for affording her the opportunity to see her wife again. She would never be able to express enough gratitude for the second chance she was granted. Because, after all the tears, heartache, anger, and despair, Callie knew without a doubt that she and Arizona were now stronger together than they had ever been - and that would be their constant - the one thing that would never change.

Taking another sip of her wine, Callie once again glanced in Arizona's direction, watching the other woman wink back at her when she caught her eye. Callie smiled in return, slightly flushed from the alcohol she had consumed and from her constant state of arousal caused by the sheer sensuality that had seemed to radiate from her wife for the entire evening.

Locking eyes with the blonde, Callie cheekily blew her a kiss from across the room and, picking up her wine glass, she and Miranda exited the kitchen - Miranda joining her boys and Callie joining her _something. _

Her whole world.

* * *

Before the front door of their house was completely closed behind their last guest, Callie had Arizona pinned against it, moist lips blazing a trail down an ivory neck and a tanned right thigh pressing firmly against the blonde's center.

"You're mine tonight," Callie husked into Arizona's ear, possessively grasping slim hips to pull the blonde more firmly against her.

As Callie nipped at Arizona's jawline, the blonde couldn't help the laughter that escaped her lips when Callie's nose tickled the sensitive skin of her neck.

"Ca-Callie! Stop!" Arizona shrieked through a fit of giggles. "That tickles."

Callie chuckled along with her wife before quickly capturing pink lips in a heated kiss, effectively changing the blonde's laughter into soft moans of pleasure.

As Callie's tongue darted into Arizona's mouth, the blonde massaged it with her own in a battle of wills before her teeth grazed along a plump bottom lip, sucking it into her mouth.

"I've wanted to do this all night," Callie breathlessly murmured, pulling her lip from between her wife's teeth before nipping her way down the sensitive skin covering Arizona's clavicle. "You're so damn sexy in this dress," Callie huskily stated, her lust filled eyes salaciously studying every inch of Arizona's from bottom to top.

"I thought you might like it," Arizona sexily replied, tightly wrapping her arms around curvaceous hips as she forcefully pushed Callie backward through the foyer and into the family room. Then pressing her right knee into the heat of Callie's core, Arizona forcefully resumed their kissing, now roughly grasping at the Latina's breasts through the silky fabric of the deep purple cocktail dress she wore.

"I said - _you are mine_, tonight," Callie murmured, pushing Arizona down onto the couch. "You don't get to be in charge."

Arizona only offered her wife a sexy smirk and, tilting her head to the side to study the beautiful woman standing before her, their eyes then locked as Callie straddled the blonde's lap.

Pushing the fabric of Callie's dress upward to bunch at her waist, Arizona hungrily caressed and squeezed the newly exposed caramel skin of Callie's thighs, her own hips bucking upward in a silent plea for the delicious friction Arizona craved.

Callie's hands travelled down Arizona's chest, gently stroking smooth skin before grazing perfectly rounded breasts with her palms, Arizona's nipples hardening to a point beneath her touch. Leaning forward, Callie then captured Arizona's lips in an open mouth kiss and, lowering herself to grind her center against that of her wife, she then pulled her mouth away from those inviting pink lips to lick the shell of an ivory ear before blowing cool air against it.

Giggling in spite of herself, Arizona once again pressed her hips upward to meet her wife's heated center.

"You're super ticklish tonight. And super _giggly_," Callie mused when she pulled back to look at her wife, a megawatt smile on her face.

"Well, I'm super happy." _Peck. _"A little tipsy." _Peck. _"And so hot for you right now that I might actually explode if you don't touch me."

Callie grinned, quickly pecking Arizona's lips before removing herself from her lap. As she turned from her wife, Callie then grabbed a blanket from the back of the couch, spreading it onto the floor in front of the fireplace that had been burning all evening long. Grabbing throw pillows from the couch and nearby chairs, she then went about scattering them on the floor.

"Come here, beautiful," Callie then urged, grabbing Arizona's hand and pulling her to her feet.

Staring into Arizona's beautiful cerulean eyes, Callie's hands travelled down her wife's sides to where her skirt ended just above her knees before grasping the material and pushing it up and over her head in one fell swoop.

To return the favor, Arizona's hands moved to Callie's back, effortlessly lowering the zipper of her dress with deft fingers and, once they were both rid of their dresses, Callie's hands immediately reached for her wife's black lace panties that were denying her access to pleasure center that lie beneath.

Kneeling before the blonde, Callie nudged the front of Arizona's lace covered center with her nose, reveling in the dampness that was already saturating the thin fabric. Hooking her thumbs in the waistband, Callie painstakingly removed the garment, allowing Arizona to step from it before pulling her wife down to kneel in front of her.

"I've got you," Callie stated when she saw the skepticism in her wife's eyes.

Reaching behind the blonde, Callie then unfastened her matching black lace bra, effectively releasing perfect breasts from their lacy confinement.

"Perfect," Callie murmured as her mouth latched onto a turgid nipple, her right hand tweaking the other into a hardened bud.

Arizona leaned forward, pressing Callie back onto the mountain of pillows laid out in front of the crackling fireplace and, as she guided her wife's panties down her silky smooth curves, the blonde subconsciously licked her lips as delicious folds, swollen with arousal, were revealed to her. Grinning seductively, Arizona met her wife's sultry gaze before sticking out her tongue to lick her way up and down Callie's wet slit, parting moist folds with her tongue along the way.

"God, baby," Callie moaned, her hips rocking her drenched core into the blonde's hot mouth. "Mmm, so good."

Chuckling softly, Arizona moved her mouth from where Callie needed her most as she began to lick and suck her inner thighs, paying special attention to the spot behind Callie's right knee that never ceased to make the woman tremble.

Soft moans grew louder as Arizona continued to lick, kiss, and suck her way up her wife's body and, when she reached moist parted lips, she slipped her tongue inside, engaging Callie's hot mouth in an intimate tryst of moist lips, and insistent tongues.

Breathlessly pulling away, Arizona then straddled Callie's hips, pulling her upward into a sitting position and, reaching forward, Arizona then lightly stroked the curve of her wife's breasts that spilled over the top of her deep purple bra before unfastening the clasp and tossing it to the side.

Pressing her erect nipples into those of her wife, Arizona then bent her head downward, pulling a hardened nub into her mouth and gently rolling it between white teeth.

"Mmmm, Arizona! I need to feel you against me," Callie urgently groaned and, locking her eyes with the heavily lidded ones of her wife, Callie then insistently grasped Arizona's hips, pulling her engorged center closer to her own. Gasping loudly when she felt her wife's hot essence coat her lower abdomen and pubic bone, Callie's hand then trailed between their heated bodies, her fingers lightly grazing across her clit.

Moving further downward, Callie teasingly dipped her index finger into Arizona's opening before slowly drawing it out, her wife's wetness clinging to her finger and, reaching forward, Callie then ran her wet finger over Arizona's already moist lips before quickly leaning forward to lick the arousal from its owner's mouth.

"You taste so good," Callie sensually husked.

No longer able to control the unbridled lust and arousal that had been building inside of her for most of the evening, Arizona instantly smashed her lips against Callie's, her mind reeling from the tang of her own arousal mixed with the familiar flavor of her wife's mouth. And, reluctantly pulling away, Arizona then reached down to quickly remove her prosthesis before roughly forcing her center against her wife's throbbing clit, darkened blue eyes locking with the now black orbs of her wife.

"Oh, God," Callie groaned as she stared into lust filled eyes. "That feels so good. More, baby."

Arizona tangled her hands into thick brunette locks as she roughly rolled her hips, creating a luscious friction of clit against clit, aroused nipples against aroused nipples.

Callie met Arizona's rhythm, further igniting the heat she felt in the pit of her stomach, her arousal quickly beginning to spiral out of control.

"Harder, Callie!" Arizona demanded, throwing her head back on her shoulders, her eyes beginning to roll into the back of her head as her wife obeyed her commands. "Oh, fuck! Yes baby!"

"God, Arizona!" Callie moaned as she furiously ground their clits together. "I'm gonna. . .oh fuck!" she screamed as an orgasm ripped through her entire body, leaving her drenched core pulsing uncontrollably, her muscles rigid and shuddering violently.

Arizona continued to rock against Callie's throbbing center as the Latina roughly squeezed her breasts, increasing her pace as she rapidly approached her own earth shattering climax.

Screaming in ecstasy, Arizona bit down on her bottom lip, her eyes slamming shut as unrelenting spasms quaked through her core.

Unable to remain sitting upright for a moment longer, Callie leaned back, dragging the trembling blonde down to lie on top of her and, with their breathing ragged, Callie ran her fingers over the small of Arizona's back, drawing random patterns in an attempt to calm her racing heart. As they both regained their senses, their lips once again met in a sensual dance of passion and lust.

"Oh my God," Callie breathlessly whispered as she pulled away. "Wow."

"I think it's safe to say that _this room_ has now been christened," Arizona teased, chuckling softly as she pressed her hips firmly into Callie's, causing both women to shiver as small orgasmic pulses surged through their centers.

"So, that's what? 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 rooms down?" Callie pondered, ticking off the number of rooms of their new home they had already gotten lucky in.

"Five," Arizona countered with a smirk. "I think you're probably forgetting the night I went down on you in the study."

Callie softly chuckled as she rolled on top of her wife. "You're right, I was forgetting _that_, though I'm not sure how."

"We'll just have to do it again sometime to help you commit it to memory," Arizona stated with a sexy smile.

"Such a big house with so many rooms," Callie mused as she began kissing along her wife's jawline. "How are we ever going to find the time to christen them all?"

"Oh, I think we'll manage."

* * *

**AN2: **Thank you all so much for continuing to read and review. Just one more chapter after this one and then two epilogues! Thanks again! I look forward to seeing what you think!


	19. Chapter 19

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Last chapter before the two epilogues. Thank you all so much for taking an interest in this story the second time around. Also, I will be putting this into PDF format after the epilogues have been posted, so please PM me your email address if you would like a copy. Thanks again!

* * *

_**Chapter Nineteen**_

* * *

An icy chill to her feet and toes combined with a persistent ache in her shoulders and neck slowly pulled Callie from the comfort of her dreams. Still lying on the blanket covered hardwood floor in front of a now nearly extinguished fire in the hearth, she stretched her legs and then her back, groaning softly at the stiffness she felt in her tired muscles.

Her groan soon morphed into a contented smile, though, as she extended her arms from under the warmth of the blanket and, softly sighing, she quickly snuggled back into the comfort of the covers, her eyes now fully opening as she rolled onto her right side where she last remembered her gloriously naked wife pleasantly cuddled into her own body.

Surprised to find herself alone, Callie quickly sat up, her gaze flitting around the room as she once again groaned at the stiffness in her aching muscles. And, wrapping the blanket more snugly around her body, Callie then slowly stood, quickly noting that their passionately discarded clothing had been picked up, along with the few stray wine glasses and tumblers left by their party guests.

After searching the entire first floor for her missing wife, Callie then made her way up the winding staircase toward the master bedroom, sure that the blonde had gotten cold on the hardwood floor and made her way up to the serenity of their room.

Pushing open the door, she was surprised to find the bed still perfectly made, throw pillows adorning it like a picture from a page of _ELLE DECOR_ magazine and, tossing the blanket covering her body onto the bed, Callie then grabbed a pair of flannel pajama pants and a thermal Henley shirt to quickly cover her chilled body.

Slipping into a pair of fuzzy slippers and a hooded sweatshirt, she exited the bedroom, stopping first to check on Sofia. Gazing into the soft purple bedroom, Callie smiled at the site of Sofia sprawled unceremoniously on the white toddler bed and, quietly padding into the room, she pulled the brightly colored owl adorned quilt up over the toddler's body, gently kissing her forehead.

Callie then pushed silky dark hair back from Sofia's angelic face as she adoringly watched the little girl sleep for a few brief moments.

After a few moments, satisfied that Sofia was safe and sound in the warmth of her bed, Callie then exited the room, once again in search of her AWOL lover. Checking the study, the playroom, and the two remaining bedrooms, Callie suddenly began to worry at her inability to locate her wife.

As she descended the stairs, Callie briefly wondered if this evening had been too much. Maybe the dress, the guests, and the conversation concerning their trip - intermingled with talk of the crash and her leg - had been more than she could handle.

Quickly pushing those thoughts into the furthest recesses of her mind, Callie considered that perhaps Arizona had been paged into the hospital and, grabbing her phone from the bar in the kitchen, she checked it for any messages but, finding none, she peeked into the garage, noting the presence of both of their cars.

Happy that Arizona was at least present in their house _somewhere_, Callie poured herself a glass of water and, looking out the kitchen windows, Callie squinted her eyes, trying to focus on the lounge chairs positioned on the deck.

Stepping closer, Callie's suspicions were confirmed when she saw the top of Arizona's head, blonde hair thrown up into a messy ponytail, relaxing on the double chaise lounge and, moving to stand at the stove, Callie lit the burner to heat some water in the teapot, content to just stand for a moment and silently watch her wife.

* * *

When Arizona had awakened an hour prior, she'd tried mightily to return to her slumber, cocooned in the warmth and security of her lover's arms.

But, after several minutes with no success, she resigned herself to the fact that, while she should still be sleeping, her body and mind were unwilling to allow her that luxury.

So, gently placing a whisper of a kiss against Callie's lips, she lovingly watched her sleep before sitting up and reaching for her prosthesis. Assured that it was donned appropriately, she then wrapped herself in the only remaining blanket left in the family room. Making sure that the Callie's body was also completely covered, Arizona then stood from her spot, grabbing their discarded dresses and undergarments before making her way to the stairs.

After bundling herself in a pair of flannel pajama pants and an oversized sweatshirt, she then threw her hair up into a messy ponytail before donning a pair of UGG boots. Assured that Sofia was comfortably bundled in her bed, she descended the stairs.

Quietly moving about the family room, she picked up forgotten wine glasses and tumblers from their party just hours before and, glancing once more toward her sleeping wife, Arizona lovingly smiled as she watched Callie peacefully sleeping before moving out of the house and onto the deck to cuddle up with a thick wool blanket on the double chaise lounge.

Looking up toward the stars, Arizona closed her eyes, a contented sigh leaving her lips.

She wasn't necessarily shocked, but had to admit that she was a little _surprised_ at how well the evening had gone - how happy and confident she'd felt. The look on Callie's face when she had descended the stairs - wearing that dress - was more than enough to calm her tremulous nerves, allowing her to wholly enjoy the company of their friends.

And then - my God - the way Callie had made love to her - not just once - but three times, on the floor of their family room in front of a sweltering fire, made her feel more like her old self than she had in months. Arizona could honestly say that, right now, as she sat on the deck of the beautiful new home she shared with her wife and daughter, she was happier than she had ever been.

Snuggling deeper into the lounge as she pulled the blanket tightly around her, she couldn't help but remember a time when she didn't think she would survive long enough to see her beautiful wife and daughter again, let alone be around long enough to get remarried, legally adopt Sofia as her own, and become a mortgage paying homeowner.

Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, Arizona tilted her head to the side as her memories consumed her.

_Lost in the mountainous wilderness, Arizona could think of nothing but her girls; she could see nothing but their smiling faces. But, as the days passed - as hope of rescue became more and more austere - she solemnly began to ponder Callie raising Sofia alone. _

_Arizona couldn't help but imagine Callie taking their little girl to her first day of kindergarten, teaching her to ride a bike, and later to drive a car. Images of a stunningly beautiful Latina with her mother's dark hair and eyes and caramel skin - but with her father's nose - flashed through Arizona's weary mind. She helplessly watched as Sofia walked across a stage to graduate from high school, college, and then medical school. _

_She saw Sofia's equally beautiful mother -with greying hair and a nostalgic smile - giving Sofia away at her wedding. _

_Would their little girl be happily married to a man? To a woman? _

_Would she have children of her own? _

_Would Callie raise Sofia alone, or would she find someone else worthy of her love? _

_That thought alone was simply too much for Arizona to bear. And, as the days continued to pass, Arizona's exhausted mind jumped from thoughts of Sofia running through the park and Callie cooking Chicken Picatta as she sang and danced around the kitchen, to thoughts as inane as whether or not she remembered to schedule that month's car payment. _

_And, her parents. Had Callie called them? _

_Oh, God - her poor parents._

Snuggling further into her blanket, Arizona glanced toward her phone that rested on the table beside the chaise lounge, noting that it was nearly 3:00am. She knew she should be cuddled in her wife's arms in front of the fireplace or in their king sized bed but, for some reason - tonight of all nights - her mind simply refused to let her rest.

_Most of the days in the woods and her time spent in Dump Truck, Idaho were a blur, but she could perfectly recall the very moment when she saw her wife for the first time in so many days. _

_When she saw Callie standing - waiting for her - in the room that would become her own for the next several weeks, Arizona could no longer control her emotions. In Boise, she had remained tough - tried to be strong - but, when she saw Callie for the first time, her heart nearly stopped as relief flooded her being. _

_The once vibrant Brunette appeared pale and exhausted, but she was still her Calliope and, as Callie gathered her into her arms to rock her soothingly, Arizona clung to her like a life raft in a tumultuous ocean of fear and despair. _

_And, in a whirlwind of tests and conversations, her treatment soon began. Arizona talked endlessly with Callie concerning her options. They decided to initially repair her leg with an external fixator while they administered rounds and rounds of IV antibiotics, trying to get the infection under control. _

_After nearly six weeks in the external fixator, it was removed, leaving them to determine their next course of treatment. Callie wanted to wait. They still needed to get the infection under control, but the IV Vancomycin wasn't working. Arizona begged Callie to do something - to try something different. She begged her not to give up on her and not to let them take her leg. _

_Arizona remembered how hysterical she had become when she realized that her only option was to have her leg amputated, but Callie thought differently. She forced Owen to approve surgery for intramedullary nailing as the final repair, even though they all knew amputation would be best. _

_But, then - miraculously - she started to improve and, with each passing day, as Arizona improved physically, she began to feel the joy again. She could feel herself slowly returning to her old self. She looked forward to each new day and felt more hopeful than she had in the entire two months she had spent in the hospital. She had lunch with Callie and Sofia nearly every day and, on the days when Callie was in surgery, Miranda Bailey would bring Sofia for lunch. _

_All of that hope and joy was soon shattered, though - on the evening she awoke to find Callie at her bedside, looking - what was the look on her face? Guilt? Shame? Fear? _

_Had something happened during Derek's surgery? _

_The last thing Arizona remembered was telling her wife she was outstanding - an amazingly good doctor - before kissing her goodbye as she went off to perform miracles by repairing Derek Shepherd's million dollar hand. _

_But, that wasn't it. Nothing had happened during Derek's surgery. At least, not to him. _

_And, at that point, Arizona felt the earth - her world - drop right out from under her._

_Her leg had to be amputated in order to save her life, but Callie had promised that she wouldn't let anyone take it. _

_Callie was supposed to protect her. _

_She was supposed to be her person. _

_Arizona recalled wondering if she would ever be able to come to terms with the fact that the person she loved most in the world, was ultimately responsible for the worst thing that had ever happened to her._

Arizona sighed, closing her eyes to fend off the memories. But, she couldn't. Her mind simply refused to let her.

_She remembered Callie's strangled pleas and infuriated demands to get up, get out of bed, and snap out of it. But, completely lost in an endless sea of absolute denial, oppressive self-degradation, and tormenting depression, she had barely been able to process breathing, let alone do anything else. _

_It was bad. Everything was terrible -no moment any worse than the last but, Arizona was keenly aware that - their lowest point happened the night Callie came to pick her up for a settlement meeting following the plane crash to find her sitting on the bathroom floor in a pool of her own urine._

_Arizona shuddered as she recalled the state she was in when Callie arrived home that night._

_Why had she been so stubborn?_

_Why hadn't she just let Callie in?_

_Why hadn't she just listened to her wife when she had asked her to keep the wheelchair or her crutches nearby in case she needed them?_

_Arizona knew that - that night - there was a clear shift in her own behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, she had slowly begun to heal. She forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. She coerced her body up and out of bed, forcing herself to communicate with Callie. She compelled herself to productively participate with rehabilitation and to take the advice of a prosthetist._

_She recalled her hesitance to go into the hospital, even though Callie promised she wouldn't tell a living soul that she was there. She could barely stand to look at herself, and she certainly didn't need the nosey staff of SGMW ogling her. _

Arizona chuckled as she recalled the stupid joke David, her prosthetist, had made the moment they met each other. Obviously, her leg was never going to grow back so, of course, she was going to have to work with him or another prosthetist periodically until the day she died.

_In time, Arizona slowly found some peace with Callie, but their every interaction remained strained. _

_She slowly began to interact with Sofia again, and Arizona remembered one particular night in which she exited their bedroom to hear frustrated words coming from her wife as Sofia squealed happily. _

_Entering the toddler's bedroom and then her bathroom, Arizona couldn't help the laughter that erupted from deep inside her upon seeing Callie dripping wet, drenched from head to toe as a result of a bath toy Mark had purchased for their toddler months prior. _

_She recalled the surprised, yet excited look on her wife's face at her presence. That was the first night they laughed together in months. _

_And, on that night, Arizona resigned herself to the fact that this was her life. _

_These were her girls, and she needed to be better for them. _

_So, she worked hard. Callie encouraged her through learning to walk again but, in the end, Callie was just too much pressure - she was pushing too hard - or maybe, in reality, not enough. _

_But then, like a gift from God, Miranda Bailey called her out of nowhere, asking for help on a Peds Case at the hospital. She was busy, though - TRENDY magazine was excellent reading, and she was sure she had a US Weekly or a COSMO lying around somewhere, just begging for her attention. _

_But, ultimately, she agreed that an intern could bring her the file. So, she waited - someone would ring the bell. _

_That was a given, right? _

_Not._

Arizona shook her head, remembering how angry she had been after walking across the room to find no chart at her doorstep and, in that moment, she knew she had been setup. By none other than Miranda Bailey.

_Even though she was progressing by leaps and bounds, Arizona knew that she was still struggling both physically and emotionally. She couldn't admit that, though. She had come so far. How could she still be struggling?_

_Arizona would always remember the door of that enormous gleaming black recreation vehicle opening to reveal a stunning Latina bounding down the few steps to land on the sidewalk with a flourish, a megawatt smile gracing her face. _

_My God, how happy and excited Callie looked. _

_She recalled closing her eyes the moment she saw her, as she tried to take a snapshot in her head of Callie's smile. _

_She missed that beaming megawatt grin – she missed a lot of things. _

_Callie wanted to take her away from everything. She wanted to take her and Sofia and go away together as a family. It really was a lovely gesture, but even then Arizona knew that she kept fighting against her. Her Type A personality, along with the anger she constantly seemed to harbor - once again took hold of her already fragile emotional state - and again she lashed out. _

_Why was she still fighting Callie so hard? _

_Why was she still pushing her away? _

_Arizona remembered reluctantly ascending the stairs of the RV, knowing that this was it. It was now or never. _

_And so, their journey began. Literally a journey taken on roads, regardless of the stops en route, but figuratively a journey of reaffirmation, healing, and reconciliation, regardless of the bumps along the way. _

_And, at some point, she was finally able to see the bigger picture. Re-building her self-esteem would be an ongoing process but, with Callie's love and support, there was a way of fighting back. There would always be struggles, but they were better together - they would battle this thing together. _

_She realized that in order to love Callie, she needed to love herself, but it was so much easier to blame than to take a good hard look at herself. It wasn't Callie's responsibility to change her self-image or to fix her self-doubt. It was hers and hers alone. And, after coming to that realization, Arizona really felt like everything was going to be okay. _

_The past several months had been Hell on Earth, but she finally felt like they were stepping out of the darkness and into the light. And then, suddenly they were getting legally married, she was adopting Sofia as her own, and they were buying the beautiful home which just that evening had been filled with more love and more joy than she ever could have imagined._

Arizona was quickly pulled from her reverie by the buzzing of her cell phone.

Confused at who would be texting her at this time of night or day - however she chose to look at it - she grinned when she saw a picture of Callie staring back at her and, flicking her thumb across the screen, she read her text message.

_Hot Cocoa? Tea? Me? :o)_

**Tea, please. **

_Just tea?_

**And you, of course. Always you! :oP**

Arizona smiled as she cuddled even further into the comfort of the lounge. She would forever be thankful to Callie for all that she had done.

She saved her life.

She saved their marriage and made her realize just how much she had to live for.

Most importantly, though, Callie taught her to love again. To love Callie. To love Sofia. To love herself.

Stepping out the deck door and pulling it closed behind her, Callie momentarily studied her wife, noting the pensive look on her face. "Hey," she softly called, juggling two mugs of steaming liquid, two extra blankets, and a baby monitor in her hands.

"Hey," Arizona replied, looking over her shoulder toward her wife.

"You okay?" Callie asked as she stepped closer, handing a mug to the shivering blonde. "It's freezing out here."

Arizona only smiled before taking a sip of piping hot liquid and setting it aside. "Come here," she simply requested.

Callie immediately set down her mug and, after throwing both blankets over the blonde, she then slipped beneath to join her. Cuddling closer to Arizona, Callie settled in behind her, securely wrapping her arms around her waist.

"I feel very old," Callie ruefully stated as she kissed her wife's temple before resting her chin on her shoulder. "The hardwood floor is _not_ my friend. I may not be able to walk in the morning."

Arizona chuckled as she nuzzled her nose against that of her wife. "I may not be able to walk in the morning, but it'll be for reasons _much more _pleasurable than sleeping on the hardwood floor."

"Hah!" Callie barked laughter. "You loved every single minute of it," she breathed as she playfully nipped at her wife's ear.

"Hey," Arizona teased, a dimpled grin on her face. "I wasn't complaining."

They sat in comfortable silence for several moments, both content to just be in the others presence.

"Thank you," Arizona finally whispered into the night.

"For what, sweetie?" Callie asked, a slightly confused look on her face as she turned toward her wife.

"For saving my life. For saving our marriage. For making me realize how much I still have to live for," Arizona immediately responded. "For loving me."

"I will _always_ love you, Arizona."

Arizona nodded her head; she knew that was one hundred percent true. "I know," she replied without hesitation. "But it's more than that. It's more than _you_ loving _me_. You taught me how to love myself again, Calliope. You helped me learn to accept myself as I am and to value my imperfections."

Callie lovingly gazed at her wife and, unwilling to allow Arizona to diminish the work she had put into her own healing and their eventual reconciliation, Callie reached up with both hands, reverently cupping the sides of an ivory face. "All I did was love you, Arizona. You did the hard part."

Arizona shook her head, refusing to relent. "Maybe - partly. But, it's because of you that I'm able to accept love - and joy - back into my heart. Without you, that never would have happened, and I'll never be able to repay you for that."

Callie sighed, willing to except that this had been a team effort. "No payment necessary," she whispered with a smile. "And, in my eyes - You. Are. Perfect. Nothing will ever change that," she earnestly admitted as she gently brushed her lips against Arizona's. "But, it wasn't just me. I don't deserve all the credit. It would have been the easiest thing in the world for you to just give up, but you didn't. You're so strong, Arizona. You fought against all the odds. You held it together and fought back when everyone else would have understood if you completely fell apart. I was just there to give you a little. . .push."

Tipping her head to the side, Arizona opened her mouth to argue, but decided against it. "How about we just agree to disagree?" she cheekily replied.

Callie chuckled softly in response before offering her wife a resolute nod.

Taking a moment to study her wife's face Arizona then lovingly caressed a caramel cheek, no words necessary.

Cuddling back into Callie's arms, Arizona then let out a contented sigh.

"I'm really happy."

"Me, too."

"I can just see us ten years from now in this big ol' house, with a bunch of kids running around. . ."

Callie's eyes shifted toward her wife, a stunned look on her face. "A bunch of kids, huh?"

Arizona shrugged, grinning at Callie's surprise. "Maybe," she teased.

"We'll see," Callie happily replied, nearly giddy at her wife's admission.

Arizona then sat up, pulling the blankets along with her as she moved to straddle her wife's lap, and wrapping her arms around Callie's neck, she settled more firmly against her body.

"Callie, I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow or the next day - or even the day after that - but, what I do know is - you and I together are stronger than we could ever be apart. There is nothing that our love can't conquer - no door our love can't open. Our love is strong enough to resolve any problem and weather any storm."

Callie lovingly gazed into Arizona's cerulean eyes before leaning forward to take possession of her chilled lips and, then pulling her down completely on top of her, Callie softly moaned into Arizona's mouth as they continued their passionate exploration of each other.

And, as they kissed, both women knew that - at some point - they made a decision. They decided that love is a choice, and that there is no weakness in being able to forgive.

Together, they suffered.

Together, they lost.

Together, they chose to back each other up without limits, to allow themselves to grow without borders, and to love without end.

When Arizona pushed, Callie pulled. She pulled her directly into the journey of a lifetime. And, without even knowing it, Callie began their journey by simply reaching out and taking Arizona's hand.

The beautiful journey into their future began when they learned to let go of the past and chose to discover things about themselves that they never considered before. Like a road, their journey didn't lead them in a straight line. Some roads they peeked down and took a few steps, others they committed to and travelled down for way too long. They got lost at too many intersections but, ultimately, they found that all roads were connected.

The roads they travelled were connected, just like their hearts. It didn't matter what they did or where they went, no matter the traffic or roadblocks or wrong turns, the beauty of their journey came when they realized that they needed to turn around. They needed to turn around and accept that there are no boundaries or barriers when two people are destined to be together. Because for them, it was simple. They were made for each other.

Even when. . .it don't come easy.

* * *

**AN2: **Happy Friday! As always, your reviews, comments, and questions are always welcome. Thanks again and have a nice weekend!


	20. Epilogue One

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **This was originally written as a one-shot stand alone, though it does actually belong in the universe of this story. For the sake of continuity, I decided to publish it here as the first epilogue with the original epilogue to follow. I hope that makes sense. Happy reading!

* * *

_**Epilogue One**_

* * *

_**Eighteen months later. . .**_

"Dr. Robbins!" Alex Karev stated as he quickly entered the OR, a surgical mask held over his face. "It's Callie. There's a problem."

Arizona's eyes immediately snapped up from her work inside the tiny human lying before her, expert hands stilling in their place. "What?" she incredulously asked.

"Her water just broke in the middle of a knee replacement. She passed out, but she's. . ."

Arizona's mind started to race. "She _passed out_? H-how long?" she urgently interrupted, her voice cracking with each question.

"Less than a minute. Bailey's with her now. They're taking her to. . ."

"Shut up, shut up!" Arizona quickly demanded, her worried mind now searching through the bank of her memory for a possible cause. "Was it vasovagal? D-did she have a cardiac arrhythmia? Orthostatic hypotension?" she fired off in rapid succession. "Did they give her steroids to mature the baby's lungs? Is she having contractions?"

Alex sighed, nodding his head. "ECG was fine. Baby's heart rate is fine. They started fluids and supplemental oxygen. Corticosteroids are on board. Contractions seem to be about twelve minutes apart."

Arizona found that her mind was completely unable to focus. "I, umm - Karev. . ." she stuttered before shaking her head in a valiant attempt to clear her mind of the memories of Sofia's untimely birth that began to cloud her thoughts. "I - I have to. . .I need you to scrub in," she stammered and, taking a moment to gather herself as much as she possibly could, she then cleared her throat. "It's just an appy. I've already started to reapproximate the external oblique aponeurosis. You just need to irrigate and close."

"Dr. Robbins. . ."

"Now, Karev!" Arizona adamantly ordered at the very moment that her usually steady surgeon hands began to shake. "Go! Now!"

* * *

Minutes later Arizona rushed down the OR hallway, pink scrub cap still in place, blue surgical gown flapping behind her. "It's too soon. Not again," she muttered to herself, repeatedly striking the elevator button as she anxiously awaited the lift to arrive. And, once she was finally deposited on the Maternal and Infant Care Unit, she then rushed down the hallway toward the nurse's station. "Shannon! Where's Dr. Torres?" she anxiously asked the charge nurse.

"Labor and Delivery Room 4, Dr. Robbins," Shannon quickly informed.

"Have you paged Dr. Oliver?" Arizona briskly questioned as she hastily turned to move further down the hallway.

Immediately following behind the blonde surgeon, Shannon wrapped a stethoscope around her own neck. "He's in Atlanta with his family for Christmas," she hastily informed. "Dr. Edwards is the resident on call, but Dr. Bailey said not to page her until you got here."

Arizona let out a heavy sigh. "Don't bother paging her," she grumbled with a huff. "Dr. Bailey and I will take care of everything. Just, umm. . .will you please call OR 2 right now and tell Dr. Karev that I said to get his ass up here as soon as he's finished."

Shannon gave a resolute nod. "Yes, Dr. Robbins. Of course," she agreed, turning on her heel and quickly returning to the nurse's station, immediately grabbing the phone.

Finally arriving at her wife's room, Arizona placed her hand on the door knob to enter but, briefly paused, taking a deep breath before slowly letting it out. "This isn't the same. This is _not_ the same," she softly whispered to herself but, try as she might, she simply could not separate this baby's birth from Sofia's.

"It's _not_ the same. The baby will be fine," Arizona again tried and, shaking her head, she struggled to somehow find a way to turn off the doctor inside of her in order to switch on the loving wife and expectant mother. "It's _not_ the same."

Clearing her throat, Arizona then took one last cleansing breath before rushing through the large wooden door. "What the hell happened?"

"Thank God! Arizona. . ."

Miranda Bailey rolled her eyes from her position - seated at the foot of the bed. "You're stubborn wife wouldn't sit down when the scrub nurse noticed she wasn't feeling well," Miranda interrupted, looking up from between Callie's legs. "Instead, she decided to go ahead and pass out in the middle of a knee replacement."

Callie loudly huffed, quickly sitting up from her position against the pillows. "I _wasn't_ feeling bad," she adamantly countered and, noticing the identical stern looks she received from both her wife and friend, she offered a sheepish shrug. "I promise. I was _fine_. _Totally_ fine," she insisted. "This came out of nowhere, I swear. And I didn't pass out until I started to hyperventilate because my water broke in the middle of the damn OR."

Miranda pushed herself away from Callie, snapping off her gloves as she wheeled herself closer to Arizona. "Either way," Miranda huffed. "Everything seems to be fine, now. Baby and mom's heart rates are both normal, there was no meconium in the amniotic fluid, mom is dilated to five. . ."

"You know, I _am_ still in the room," Callie groaned. "And, I _do_ have a name."

"Calliope. . ."

"Torres. . ."

Arizona and Miranda simultaneously spoke, both daring the pregnant woman to go any further.

"Don't you dare scold me like a child," Callie retaliated. "You're both treating me like I purposely did something wrong, and I do _not _appreciate. . .Oh, shit!" she gasped in pain before she could finish her tirade.

Now more concerned than just moments before, Arizona immediately moved to her wife's side. "Alright, sweetie," she tried to soothe, firmly taking Callie's hand into her own. "We've been to the classes. We've practiced this over and over - and over - again. Just breathe."

Callie nodded her head, breathing with her wife through the contraction. "I know it's. . .too soon," she breathlessly stammered. "And, I can tell that you're. . .worried."

Grasping Arizona's hand as tightly as she possibly could, Callie quickly lost herself in the uneasy glaze of bright blue eyes. "I'm sorry, Arizona. I'm so. . .so sorry."

Arizona tightly shook her head as she intently gazing into the now teary brown eyes that we're currently looking back at her. "You didn't do _anything_ wrong. Our baby is going to be fine, Calliope," she earnestly insisted, though she was unsure of whom she was trying to convince more. "You've done _everything_ right, honey. Sometimes - these things just _happen_."

Callie inhaled deeply as the contraction subsided and, shaking her head, she insecurely dropped her wife's gaze. "These _things_ happen to us way too much, Arizona, and I. . .I can't do this again. I just can't. My body clearly wasn't meant to be a _baby house_ for the appropriate amount of time, and I can't do this again. I _won't_ do this again," she dejectedly continued as a large tear left a moist path down her right cheek.

"Hey," Arizona softly called, ducking her head in an attempt to catch her wife's eye. "It's okay. It's okay. Hey - so maybe this will be our last baby. It doesn't matter as long as you're both alright."

"But, I thought you wanted ten kids, Arizona - _all kinds of kids_," Callie ruefully argued, finally looking back up toward her wife.

Arizona smiled, gently wiping at Callie's face. "That may have been a bit of an exaggeration," she jokingly teased, dimples now out in full force. "Okay?"

Callie quickly wiped a stray tear from her own cheek. "Okay," she cautiously relented with a sigh.

Miranda looked between the two worried mothers before glancing toward the clock on the wall. "Contractions are about eight minutes apart," she professionally informed. "So, I'm going to go. You can have the nurses page Dr. Edwards."

"Umm, well, I. . ."

Arizona paused, unsure of the best tactic to use in order to get exactly what she wanted and, ultimately deciding to be cordial and kind, she again began to speak. "Bailey, I was hoping that you might. . ._stay_."

Miranda's eyebrows knitted together at the statement. "What? Why?" she impatiently asked. "It's Christmas Eve, Arizona, and I've been here for nearly twenty-four hours," she exhaustedly informed with a wave of her hand. "Why do you need me, anyway?"

Arizona looked between her wife and the shorter surgeon and, when she saw Miranda take another step toward the door, she quickly left Callie's side, wedging herself between the shorter woman and the exit of the room.

"Look," Arizona urgently began when Miranda afforded her with a challenging scowl. "There's only a skeleton staff here, today. Our OB is in Atlanta for the holiday, and I'll be damned if a resident baby surgeon is going to deliver _my_ baby," she rapidly continued, her voice rising in volume. "There are only about four doctors in this entire hospital that I trust enough to help bring my baby into this world, and three of them are currently in this room."

With dark brown eyes flicking from side to side, Miranda's mouth fell open as realization began to sink in. "Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no!" she complained. "I am a _surgeon_, not a damn baby doctor. I'm only here right now because you two are my friends, and I just happened to be in the scrub room when _SHE _passed out," she huffed in frustration, motioning toward Callie who sat in the bed, breathing deeply in an attempt to keep herself calm.

"Well, you're here now and, I'm sorry, but you are _not_ leaving," Arizona demanded as she quickly began to pull off the surgical gown she still wore.

"Are you threatening me?" Miranda asked, defiantly raising her brow.

Arizona once again considered her options. "Well, yes, Bailey. Yes, I am," she firmly stated. "They won't let me deliver my own child and clearly Callie can't do it all by herself, so that leaves you. . .and Alex Karev. And, while I think he's a good doctor and an excellent surgeon, he certainly isn't getting anywhere near my wife's - _vagina_ \- _ever_ again."

"Oh, for God's sake!" Callie suddenly spat. "Seriously, Arizona! That only happened once - like ten years ago!"

Arizona nodded, though she didn't completely agree. "Yes, but jealousy is a green eyed monster, Calliope and, if you ask Sofia, there's no reasoning with a monster."

Callie and Miranda both sighed, two pairs of brown eyes rolling at the blonde woman's childish and less than legitimate reply.

With her face softening and worry filling her features, Arizona slowly exhaled before once again trying to convince the broody general surgeon. "I need your help," Arizona softly admitted. "Please, Bailey. Please stay. I'm going to need you to deliver the baby with Alex on standby in case there are any. . ._complications_ once the baby's here."

Arizona's eyes soon became misty as she swallowed against the lump that was quickly forming in her throat. "Please. . ."

At Arizona's heartfelt plea, Miranda clearly began to ponder her options.

The baby was just over a month early and shouldn't have any significant problems, but she knew there was always some risk involved. It _was_ only noon and, with the way things seemed to be progressing, she would probably make it home faster than she thought.

"Fine," Miranda finally relented. "But, I don't want to hear anything from you," she huffed, pointing directly at Arizona. "You are a wife and a mother today, not a doctor. Do you hear me?"

Arizona smiled in relief. "Yes, I'll try my best," she half-heartedly agreed. "Thank you, Bailey. Thank you so much."

* * *

"Shit, Arizona," Callie muttered through a contraction. "I forgot about. . .Sofia."

"I already told you that she's with Derek and Meredith," Arizona softly tried to soothe from her position behind Callie in the bed. "The only thing you need to worry about is what's happening in this room, right now."

Callie gritted her teeth, her jaw firmly set. "I'm talking about Christmas, Arizona," she impatiently growled. "What do we tell her? Sorry, Sof, Santa skipped over you this year because your baby brother or sister decided to come early?"

Arizona sighed; there really wasn't much they could do about that right now. "We'll figure it out. Okay?" the blonde replied in an attempt to assuage her emotional and exhausted wife. "I'll bring Christmas here if I have to. Don't worry."

"Okay, Callie," Miranda interjected from her position at the foot of the birthing bed. "On the next contraction, I want you to push," she instructed. "You ready over there, Karev?" she then asked, briefly glancing to the side of the room where he stood over the clear plastic pediatric bed.

"I'm ready."

Arizona leaned forward supporting Callie who was positioned between her legs. "Are you okay?" Callie asked, turning her head slightly to meet her wife's eyes. "Is your leg okay?"

"I'm fine, Calliope," she replied, kissing her cheek and, gazing into soulful brown eyes, Arizona smile brightly. "We're having another baby," she whispered, the gravity of the situation hitting her full force.

Callie managed a half smile. "I'm having _your_ baby," she earnestly stated before the next contraction hit.

Leaning forward with Callie as she pushed for the first time, Arizona tightly held her wife's hand, supporting her as much as she possibly could.

"Ok, I can see the top of the baby's head. Lots of black hair," Miranda stated with a smile. "Okay, stop."

Callie leaned back against Arizona, a breathy groan leaving her lips.

"You're doing great, Calliope," Arizona encouraged, kissing the side of her neck.

"You ready?" Miranda again asked.

Callie nodded, bearing down to push once again.

Arizona couldn't help the tear that slipped from her eye. This may have technically been their second child but, in many ways, this was their first true delivery - their first adventure together with natural childbirth.

And, the difference was glaring.

The events surrounding Sofia's birth had been a whirlwind of terrifying activity that Callie didn't even remember - hours upon hours of trepidation and near hopelessness that Arizona would have liked to forget.

Sofia was _their girl_; she was their miracle baby and, from the very first moment she had laid eyes on that tiny baby as she struggled to get her even tinier heart to beat, Arizona had been devotedly smitten - ardently enamored by that beautiful little face.

Arizona had immediately felt a bond with Sofia like she had never before experienced with _anyone_ or _anything_ else in the world, and that binding force remained to this very day. But, now - _this_ \- was almost more than she could bear. She'd thought she was prepared for the physical act of childbirth - for being there with Callie from start to finish - but, apparently she had been wrong. Because, the fact that Callie was literally about to give birth to _her_ baby - well, that was more than she currently found herself ready for. The profound emotions that were now threatening to consume her were leaving her more than a little overwhelmed.

Several minutes and pushes later, Miranda looked up toward an exhausted Callie. "Just one more big push, and your baby will be here."

Callie tiredly nodded as she mustered her last shred of energy and, doing as she was instructed, she pushed down as hard as she could while Arizona repeated loving encouragement into her ear.

"Just a little bit more. You're doing so _awesome_. I love you, Calliope."

"It's a boy," Miranda delightfully announced moments later as the baby was forced from within his cozy home and into the cold, harsh world.

Callie and Arizona both anxiously looked toward the woman cradling their son in her arms.

"Any sounds?" Arizona fearfully asked.

"Bailey!" Callie desperately cried.

"Come on, baby. Come on little man. Give me a cry," Miranda repeated over and over again, stimulating the newborn's chest and arms, encouraging him to breathe.

Miranda looked up from the silent child, catching the worried looks on both mothers' faces.

"Bailey!" Arizona barked as she quickly moved to exit the bed.

"Don't move, Arizona!" Miranda warned. "You don't get to be a doctor today."

"Bailey, do _NOT_ tell me what I do or do not get to do!" the blonde argued as she climbed down off the bed, quickly moving toward the surgeon holding her lifeless son. "Karev!"

An instant later, the room filled with the sound of a healthy wail emanating from the tiny infant as he cried for the first time, thankfully kick starting his lungs. Miranda then quickly suctioned his mouth and nose before covering him with a blanket and placing him against Callie's chest. "Here you go, mommy," she cooed.

"Oh my God," Callie gasped as she gazed at their son for the first time.

Arizona silently stood watching the scene unfold before her and, in that instant, the feelings that overcame her were indescribable. Because, there, lying on her wife's chest was a tiny human - _her_ tiny human - made of her own flesh and blood. After waiting and watching him grow inside her wife - there he was - another tiny human she would now die for without even knowing him. Another child she already loved more than anything after only a few ticks of the clock.

"Do you want to cut the cord, momma?" Miranda asked over the din of the baby's cries.

"Umm. . .I. . .yes," Arizona stammered, looking into Callie's eyes as she nervously took the proffered surgical scissors. And, blinking twice, her gaze faltering as she looked toward her work, snipping through the cord with skilled precision.

"I need to take him, Dr. Robbins," Alex said as he stepped up beside her. "I need to listen to his heart and lungs to see how he's transitioning."

Arizona shook her head, trying to clear the fog that invaded her mind. She knew all of this. She knew the procedure - Apgar tests one minute and then five minutes after birth - but, she was wholly unable to make herself move away from her wife and son.

"Arizona."

Callie's voice finally cut through Arizona's hazy and jumbled mind.

"Are you okay?"

"I. . .I'm good," Arizona softly stated, finally stepping aside so Alex could retrieve the baby from Callie's chest.

Noticing the still dazed look masking her wife's every feature, Callie reached out, grasping an ivory hand. "Arizona. Sweetie, I think you should sit down," she urged.

"I. . .umm. . .yeah," Arizona stammered. "Maybe that would be a good idea."

Arizona gingerly slid into the chair next to Callie's hospital bed, slowly sliding the pink scrub cap from her head to reveal golden braids. And, taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes, desperately trying to somehow reign in the emotions that were currently leaving her a little off-kilter.

Certainly no experience came weighted with greater emotional expectations than the birth of a child but, with Sofia, there was no labor. There was no pushing - there was no build up to a miracle. It was like one moment she was still a dream and, the next, she was there - fighting against all the complications.

And, Arizona found her miraculous. She was so small, but so very strong. One pound, one ounce of strong with beautiful black hair. A beautiful baby girl whom Arizona loved with all her heart.

Nothing would ever change that fact - but _this_ was just so surreal. This child's birth somehow seemed to suddenly solidify Arizona's acceptance that life was no longer just about her - no longer just about Callie. While it was once wholly about their little girl who had fought so hard to survive, it was now _also_ about her newborn baby boy.

"Arizona," Callie softly called, reaching over the bedrail to gently stroke an ivory cheek, brushing away the tears she found there. "What are you thinking?"

Their son. Arizona was amazed. Stunned. Excited. And, in that moment, she became profoundly aware that the health, happiness, heart, soul, and spirit of both of her children were all that mattered.

And with that realization, Arizona was powerless to stem the tears that continued to slip past her eyelids, though a super magic smile crept onto her lips.

"He's perfect, Calliope. I. . .I'm just amazed at how perfect he is."

"One minute Apgar score is seven," Alex stated from across the room.

Arizona's attention was immediately piqued. "What? Why?" she urgently questioned, jumping up from her seat. "What's the matter."

"He was early, sweetie," Callie tried to soothe. "That's a very respectable score."

Arizona's worried gaze moved from where she strained to see her son who was surrounded by Alex and several nurses to return back toward her wife.

"Sit down with me, Arizona. I need you to hold my hand," Callie requested.

Arizona hesitantly complied, though her attention remained solely in the direction of their crying baby, her right knee bouncing as she sat.

"Weighs five pounds, eleven ounces," Alex informed the room. "Twenty inches long. Head circumference 12.8."

Callie glanced toward her wife, a knowing smile tugging at her lips. Arizona was the most steadfast person she knew and, seeing her like this - a jumbled mess of nerves and emotions -only made her more endearing. If it was possible, seeing Arizona in this new light only made Callie love her wife even more.

The look on Arizona's face when she heard their son cry for the first time was unparalleled to any amount of love and devotion she had ever witnessed, and

Callie knew that feeling well. She remembered seeing Sofia for the first time and the onslaught of emotions that came along with it. She had been rendered momentarily speechless as her mind and body metabolized the commitment and obligation she suddenly felt toward the very tiny human lying before her.

At that thought, Callie desperately wished she had been able to witness the first time Arizona had seen their daughter.

"Five minute Apgar score is ten," Alex announced.

Callie chuckled softly as she witnessed Arizona do a small happy dance in her seat, the relief her wife felt evident in her every feature as her entire body began to relax.

"See, honey. He's perfect," Callie happily stated.

Quickly standing from her seat, Arizona leaned over Callie to capture her lips in an insistent kiss. "I love you so much, Calliope," she devotedly whispered when she pulled back. "So, _so_ much."

"Alright, that's enough of that business," Miranda groaned as she stood from her seat where she had been working between Callie's legs. "All is well down _here_. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to spend the rest of Christmas Eve with _my _family, not yours," she sarcastically teased. "Is that okay with you, Dr. Robbins?"

Callie pressed her lips together in a firm line, trying to stifle her laughter at the guilty look on her wife's face.

"Yes, Dr. Bailey. That's fine with me," Arizona sheepishly conceded.

"Thank you," Miranda said as she started to walk away. "You did good, Torres. Real good," she then continued as she gazed at the child Alex was carrying toward them.

"Thanks, Bailey," Callie sincerely replied as she watched her friend exit the room.

"Here you go, Dr. Robbins," Alex said with a smirk as he gently handed the swaddled infant wearing a blue beanie over to his momma.

Cradling the tiny bundle in her arms for the very first time, Arizona was consumed by a feeling of total elation that was more than a little difficult for her to digest. She felt so much love and adoration immediately for this little bundle of joy, and she just couldn't help but want to get to know him better.

Slightly pulling back the blue blanket keeping him warm, Arizona grasped one miniature hand to count all of his fingers before moving to the next to do the same. Maneuvering him so that she could free his legs from the confinement of the blanket, she then counted ten tiny toes to make certain that he really was _perfect_.

Silently watching her wife's a she lovingly placed a gentle kiss on the bottoms of both if his wrinkled feet, Callie wiped a tear from her eye. "How you doing over there, momma?"

Arizona hesitantly looked up from the baby to regard an exhausted Callie and, stepping closer to the bed, she carefully sat on the edge, bringing the child closer to her wife for a better view.

"He looks like you, Arizona."

The blonde once again forced her eyes away from her son's face to meet Callie's attentive gaze. "I was going to say that, but. . ."

"Why not say it?" Callie asked with a slight frown. "It's true, sweetie. He may have black hair and a darker complexion, but just look at those cheeks. . .and those dimples," she continued as she affectionately ran one finger over the child's caramel colored brow.

"Callie, I. . ." Arizona trailed off, her emotions getting the better if her.

"What, sweetie? What is it?"

Arizona shook her head as silent tears once again began to fall. "I love you, Calliope, and I love Sofia. . ._so_ much."

"I know that," Callie assured her, reaching over to lightly stroke her arm.

"But this - with him - I feel like I already have a _bond_ with this precious little person, and he's not even an hour old," Arizona stated, holding him to her body with one arm as she wiped the tears from her face with the other hand.

Callie nodded; she felt exactly the same way.

"He's _our _baby," Arizona interjected.

"He is."

Arizona momentarily held Callie's gaze before reflexively looking back toward the infant in her arms. She just couldn't help herself. She now lived for the sight of him, just as she lived for the sight and sound of Sofia excitedly greeting her as she walked through the door after a long day at work.

Their children really were intoxicating, just as Callie had told her babies would be.

"I don't know how I ever thought I didn't want this," Arizona simply stated.

"Me either," Callie said with a slight chuckle. "You're so good at it. Look at him. He's already got you wrapped around his little finger."

Arizona smiled widely, dimples popping. "It's true," she admitted without hesitation.

They both sat silently, taking in the moment spent with the newest addition to their family. Clearing her throat, Arizona pulled her gaze away from the now sleeping baby. "Thank you, Callie. Thank you for this."

"Thank _you_ for changing your mind."

"I wouldn't trade this moment for anything in the world," Arizona admitted through a fresh wave of tears. "Thank you for helping me realize who I truly am - who I was meant to be."

It took all Callie had to resist the urge to scoop the baby from her wife's arms to hold him and love on him but, she instead sat back, content for the moment to just watch Arizona with their son, the love emanating from the blonde's form overwhelmingly tangible. Callie knew her time would come; she would have time to bond with their son while breastfeeding, a luxury her wife could not be granted.

"Dr. Robbins, I need to take him to the NICU for a while," Alex hesitantly informed when he re-entered the room. "You can come with us if you want."

Arizona looked from the baby back toward Callie, completely torn at what she should do.

"Go," Callie insisted with a smile, self-consciously wiping the residual moisture from her cheeks with the back of her hand. "I'll be fine."

"But. . .you haven't even really held him yet," Arizona countered, that realization setting in.

"That's because _you're_ a baby hog," Callie teased with a laugh.

"Oh, crap! I'm sorry," Arizona humbly replied, extending her arms for her wife to retrieve the baby.

"It's okay. I was kidding," Callie teased. "Go with Aiden to the NICU. I'll call Sofia."

"Are you. . ."

Arizona trailed off, overwhelmed by the sound of the baby's name spoken aloud for the very first time. "Aiden?"

Callie's brow furrowed at the question. "Well, that's his name, right?" she doubtfully asked. "Or did you change your mind again?"

Arizona shook her head, a giant smile gracing her face. "No. I. . .just. . ."

Trailed off, Arizona looked from her wife to her son, her smile never faltering. "Is that you're name, baby boy? Are you an Aiden?" she cooed as she gazed down into the angelic face of the baby in her arms. "Aiden Timothy Robbins Torres," she then stated to no one in particular.

Callie smiled, letting out a contented sigh. "Sounds perfect."

* * *

The following morning, Callie awoke with a start, the sound of a newborn's cry permeating her lethargic mind and, slowly opening her eyes, she looked around her hospital room for the source of the sound.

Finding what she was looking for in the form of Arizona standing with her back to her in the corner of the room, Callie strained to hear just what exactly Arizona was softly murmuring to the baby in her arms.

"Arizona," Callie softly called.

Arizona turned on her heal, her eyes twinkling. "Good morning, pretty lady," she softly replied as she stepped closer to her wife.

Momentarily glancing to her side, Callie's face registered surprise when she noticed a beautifully decorated Christmas tree in the corner of the room, a mountain of wrapped packages settled beneath it. Allowing herself to further inspect the room, she saw Sofia cozily sleeping on a cot next to her hospital bed.

"Wh. . ."

But, moving too quickly to sit up in bed, Callie didn't finish speaking, sore muscles protesting her movement as a groan emanated from her lips.

Stepping closer, Arizona regarded her wife with sincere concern. "You okay?"

Callie nodded her head, letting out a sigh as the pain began to ease. "I hurt in places I didn't even know existed," she then responded before her gaze once again darted around the room. "Arizona, what did you do?"

The blonde smiled brightly. "Well, I told you I'd bring Christmas here if I needed to, so. . .that's exactly what I did."

Before anything further could be said, the rustling if blankets to their right caught both women's attention.

"Momma?" a sleepy voice called.

Smiling at the adorably sleep tousled little girl, Arizona gently settled Aiden into Callie's arms before moving to sit beside Sofia on the cot.

"Hey, little miss," Arizona said as she smoothed dark hair back from the three and a half year old's face. "Come here," she continued before gathering Sofia into her arms. "I have someone I want you to meet."

Cautiously standing, Arizona hoisted the little girl, clad in Elf on the Shelf Christmas pajamas, onto her right hip before stepping toward the rest of her family.

"Sofia, this is your baby brother, Aiden," Callie gently informed when Arizona placed the little girl onto the bed next to her.

"He's little," Sofia happily stated, curiously scrutinizing the swaddled bundle.

"Yeah, he is," Arizona agreed, looking up into Callie's magical brown eyes.

"Momma, did Santa bring him to you and mommy for Christmas?"

Callie and Arizona both chuckled ruefully, neither gaze faltering. "You could say that," Arizona replied as she leaned in to kiss her wife's full lips.

Sofia reached forward, gently taking her brother's tiny hands into her own. "Hi, Aiden. I'm Sofia. I'm your big sister."

"That's tight, Aiden," Arizona agreed. "And guess what, Sof. You're going to be the - Best. Big Sister. Ever!" she excitedly added as she joined her family on the bed.

Callie watched as Arizona interacted with both if their children, wholly unable to remember a time when she had seen her wife happier than this very moment. And, leaning closer to her, she gently nuzzled her nose against a smooth ivory neck. "I love you, Arizona," Callie softly whispered into her wife's ear. "Merry Christmas."

Arizona turned her head, meeting plump lips in a fervent kiss that she hoped would convey every single ounce of love, respect, hope, and joy she was currently feeling. And, slowly pulling back, she lovingly gazed into the eyes that revealed the furthest depths of her wife's heart and soul. "Merry Christmas, baby. I love you, too."

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks so much for reading and for taking the time to review. Epilogue Two coming soon.


	21. Epilogue Two

**Title**: When It Don't Come Easy

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: NC-17

**Summary**: After watching Arizona struggle to come to terms with the aftermath of the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia. During their trip, will they be able to reaffirm their love? Or will they ultimately decide that they don't have what it takes to carry on as a family?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thank you all so much for taking the time for reading and for taking the time to review. Last update for this story!

* * *

_**Epilogue Two**_

* * *

_**Five Months Later. . .**_

"Are you sure she's ready?" Miranda asked from where she stood next to Callie while scrubbing out from their final surgery of the day.

"She says she is," Callie replied, shaking the excess water from her hands and, leaning back against the lip of the sink as she dried her hands on a blue surgical towel, she worriedly shrugged her shoulders. "She wasn't ready to go last year when the other three went, but she wants to try it now. She says it's something she _needs_ to do."

Drying her own hands, Miranda took a moment to consider the unease on her friend's face. "Are you sure _you're_ ready?"

Callie sighed, considering her words. "I don't honestly know. I _want_ to be there for her. I mean, I am _here_ for her. I'll do whatever she needs," she spoke, her thoughts short and nearly rambled and, with a shake of her head, she tried again to answer Miranda's question with nothing but the truth. "I guess. . .I'm just afraid. We've certainly had our ups and downs, Bailey. None of this has been easy."

Miranda carefully studied Callie for a moment longer. "Nothing worth doing is ever easy," she matter-of-factly stated before moving to exit the scrub room.

Callie smiled slightly, knowing her friend was right. "It's just - I don't _ever_ want to go back to the way we were immediately following the crash," she reluctantly admitted as she followed Miranda out the door. "We barely survived that."

Pausing in the surgical hallway, Miranda turned back toward her friend, her eyes sincere as she spoke. "But you _did _survive it. More than _survived_ it, if you ask me," the shorter surgeon replied. "You grew. You blossomed. You're better together now than you ever were before. . .and _even then_ you two were about as much happy as any person could bear," she added before briskly turning on her heel.

Callie chuckled at that and, taking a few quick steps to catch up with her friend, she once again settled in at her side, now walking at the same pace. "I'm _so _glad you don't do personal stuff," she teased, nudging her friend with her elbow.

"You can't fault me for that, Torres," Miranda huffed with a roll of her eyes. "I've been working with all you scandalous fools for way too long."

* * *

Later that evening, Callie sat against the headboard of their king sized bed with five month old Aiden facing her, his chubby fingers tightly grasping her thumbs as he attempted to sit up unassisted.

"Did you pack Aiden's diapers?" Arizona absentmindedly asked from across the room, bras, underwear, and socks flying from the chest of drawers as she anxiously moved around the master bedroom. "Where's Little Miss?"

"I did," Callie offhandedly drawled. ". . .and Sofia is downstairs doing evening PT with your dad," she continued, her attention never leaving the happy little bundle of joy in front of her. Leaning in closer to loudly blow against his cherubic cheek, she quickly pulled back, surprise evident on her face. "Oh! I think he's getting a tooth! Arizona! Come look!" she excitedly exclaimed with a huge smile as she closely examined the baby's drool filled mouth.

Arizona immediately dropped a handful of clothes into the open suitcase at the foot of the bed and, quickly scooting up to sit next to her wife, she gently squeezed Aiden's chubby cheeks with one hand as she peered into his mouth. "What are we going to do with you?" she then teasingly asked as she pulled him into her lap. "You're already getting to be such a big boy!"

Callie pensively watched her wife as she cheerfully played with their son and, after enjoying the sight of the two of them together for several long moments, she then leaned into Arizona's side, placing a firm kiss against her temple. "You sure you're ready for this?"

Arizona didn't immediately respond, her shoulders becoming slightly rigid, as the carefree smile slowly began to vacate her face. But, turning toward her wife, she blew out a cleansing breath, adamantly refusing to give in to the doubts she was currently experiencing. "I'm sure," she finally stated with a resolute nod of her head. "It's been three years, Calliope. I'm ready. I want - no, I _need_ to do this."

Callie briefly regarded the steadfast set of her wife's features and, leaning in, she lovingly caressed Arizona's lips with her own. "Okay," she agreed once she'd pulled away and, after once again pecking at perfect pink lips she then stood from the bed. "While you play with McDrooly, I'll help you pack."

* * *

The following day, as she stood at their departure gate at Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, Arizona gulped for air, her mind racing as she settled herself into a hard plastic seat, her hands clenched into fists against her furrowed brow. "They can't g-g-go, Callie," she stammered, tears forming in her eyes. "I-I-I don't want them to go. I thought it would be okay, but it's not. Sofia and Aiden. They can't go. It's not safe."

Quickly handing Aiden to Barbara Robbins, Callie knelt in front of her distraught wife as she glanced sidelong towards her in-laws and children. "Just take a minute, Arizona. It's okay, sweetie. Breathe. . .just breathe," she tried to soothe as she took clammy hands into her own, her forehead gently coming to rest against that of her wife. "Listen to me, Arizona," she firmly stated, though the love and adoration she felt for this woman was still evident in her tone and, pulling back just enough to meet watery blue eyes, she continued on through. "It's okay. We're _all_ okay. None of us have to go _anywhere_. We don't have to fly to Boise. We can drive. We can all go back home. Or, just you and I can go. Your parents can stay here in Seattle with Sofia and Aiden. It's okay, sweetie. We'll do whatever you need. _Our babies_ are safe, Arizona. _We're all_ safe."

Arizona leaned back from her wife, her eyes falling shut as a staggering breath forced itself from deep within her chest.

She could do this. She had to do this.

Slowly opening her eyes, Arizona swallowed thickly, her gaze momentarily flicking around the airport in embarrassment before ultimately landing on those magical brown depths that were filled with nothing by abiding loyalty, heartfelt concern, and unconditional love.

"Are you scared, momma?"

Shaking her head at the sound of her daughter's voice, Arizona once again closed her eyes, unremitting fear coursing through her veins.

With confusion registering on her face, Sofia released her grandfather's hand and, stepping closer to her mothers, her brown eyes curiously gazed at Arizona as she pressed her front into the side of the blonde's bent leg. "Are you scared, momma?" she again questioned.

Arizona slowly opened her eyes at the sound of the four-year-old's adorable little voice and, quickly wiping stray tears from her cheeks, she valiantly plastered a smile onto her face. "Yeah, big girl. Momma's a little scared."

Smoothing dark hair from Sofia's face, Callie then placed a gentle kiss against her forehead. "You should give momma a big hug, Sof," she whispered into the little girl's ear. "Just like she does when you're scared. Maybe that will help."

With a smile, Sofia turned toward Arizona, wrapping her arms around her neck as she climbed onto her lap. "Don't be scared, momma. It's okay," she simply stated and, leaning away from her mother's embrace, she began to move her hands in a circular motion in front of Arizona's face. "Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay. Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. . ."

"Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay," Callie tearfully repeated along with the child as she lifted herself from the floor to sit next to her wife.

"Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay."

"You have to say it three times, or it doesn't work," Sofia innocently added at the end.

Arizona let out a breathy chuckle through a wave of tears. "I know, baby. Thank you."

"That always helps when I'm scared, momma. You always help me when I have a bad dream."

Callie stood from her seat, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her after witnessing the sensitivity pour from Sofia's small form and, squeezing the sides of her eyes with her thumb and middle finger in an attempt to stave off the torrent of memories that filled her mind, she momentarily turned her back on the group, quickly wiping her face free of moisture. Then clearing her throat in an attempt to strengthen her resolve, she slowly turned back around to regard her in-laws. "Would you mind staying at the house with the kids while Arizona and I go to Boise?" she carefully asked, taking Aiden from Barbara's loving embrace.

"Of course we wouldn't mind," Barbara softly replied, her concerned attention focused intently on the struggling form of her daughter. "Whatever you two need."

Cautiously stepping toward Arizona, Daniel took the seat next to her and, placing his hand on her shoulder blade, he hesitated, considering his words. "You have to make your own decisions, Arizona, but I want you to listen to me for just one moment," he began, pausing briefly until he was sure he had her full attention. "You should never regret or be fearful of decisions you've already made. Never be sorry for what you did yesterday; it was what you wanted, what you chose. Accept that fact, and move forward. Never doubt yourself. Your mother and I raised you to be a good man in a storm, Arizona, and to protect the things you love. You are honorable and strong, and I know you can do this."

Arizona raised her chin from Sofia's shoulder, surprised by her usually stoic father's admission and, as silence overwhelmed them, not one person in their group was sure of what to say.

"Thanks, dad," Arizona finally whispered in reply and, with a confident nod of her head, she then kissed Sofia's cheek. "You'll be a good girl for Pop-Pop and Grammy, right? I want you to help them with your baby brother, okay?"

"Okay, momma," Sofia replied, quickly jumping from her lap.

Arizona briefly hugged her father before slowly standing on slightly tremulous legs. "Thank you," she stated when she then embraced her mother and, then turning toward her wife and son, a genuine smile graced her face. "I love you, baby boy," she said as she kissed his chubby cheek.

"Okay. . ." Callie stated after settling the baby back into Barbara's arms and saying her own goodbyes. "We're going to do this together, Arizona," she insisted as she faced her wife, tightly grasping her hands. "We can do this, because you and I are capable of anything as long as we do it together. And, grabbing the handle of their carry-on luggage in one hand, she pulled Arizona toward her with the other. "You ready?"

Arizona nodded her agreement, a slight smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

"I'm ready."

* * *

"Do you want the window or the aisle?" Callie asked when they reached their seats aboard Alaska Airlines Flight 2140. When Arizona had decided that she was ready to take this journey, Callie had immediately started researching flights, fear of flying, coping mechanisms, and anything else that she thought could help make this voyage as successful as possible. They had even periodically spoken with Dr. Wyatt concerning their upcoming trip and its potential fallout. The logistics of this trip had been discussed time and time again over the past couple months; Callie and Arizona had discussed everything from their seating arrangement to the time of the flight and type of plane, carry-on luggage versus stowaway, sober versus completely intoxicated. Obviously, they had decided that a daytime flight would be best, with Arizona and Callie both agreeing that abstaining from alcohol would probably be the most advantageous because they knew that the real trick to making this fully effective was to completely throw themselves into the experience. They both did agree, however, that didn't necessarily mean they wouldn't most likely need to partake of multiple alcoholic beverages once the plane had landed safely on the ground.

The only issue Arizona had been unable to fully decide on was her seat on the plane. She knew she wanted to sit over the wing because she had read that that position on the plane provided the most stability, but she was wholly noncommittal on window versus aisle. One moment she felt that she would rather be in the window seat because, in her mind, she thought if she could see out the window at all times if she could see the wing - then the sheer power of her own mind could keep the plane flying. On the other hand, she thought maybe the aisle seat would be better because it was less restrictive and for the simple fact that she _wouldn't_ be able to see the cold hard ground below.

"Arizona? Did you hear me?" Callie gently asked as she forced their carry-on into the overhead compartment. "Window or aisle, sweetie?" she repeated, tightly grasping her wife's trembling hand.

Arizona swallowed against the lump that was forming in her throat. "Umm. . .window. I think, window."

"Okay," Callie nodded, her concerned eyes never leaving her wife's unsettled features.

Taking her seat once Arizona was comfortably situated into her own, Callie protectively held two sweaty ivory hands in the safety of her own. "I'm here for you. I'm not going anywhere," she earnestly insisted. "The flight is less than an hour and a half, and you and I are totally going to kick its ass."

Smiling only slightly, Arizona reached down to buckle her seatbelt. "Thank you for doing this with me, Callie. Thank you for being here."

Callie lovingly regarded her wife, concerned brown eyes never leaving Arizona's face. "I promised you I'd go wherever you go, Arizona, and there's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be right now than right here with you," she stated as she leaned over to lay claim on moist pink lips.

"Oh," Callie cried in recollection as she quickly pulled away. "I have something for you," she excitedly exclaimed as she began digging through her purse.

Arizona curiously watched her wife as she searched further into her bag. "This is for you to listen to in case you get tired of hearing my voice," Callie teased as she handed Arizona her iPod and earbuds. "It has a brand new _My Arizona_ playlist on it that I made specifically for this trip, and this. . ." she said as she handed her wife a large leather bound photo album, ". . .is all the pictures from our road trip. I thought we could look through them during the flight."

Flicking up from the album she now held in her hands, Arizona coyly regarded her wife. "When did you have time to make this?" she asked in surprise.

Callie smiled as she watched her wife quickly flip to the first page of pictures. "We've been so bad about printing pictures from the camera so, while I was on maternity leave, I uploaded everything from our computers and iPads and anywhere else I could think of and had them printed. We have tons of pictures that still need organized, but I decided to start with this album first."

Arizona tenderly gazed at Callie before looking back down toward the photo on the first page. "Oh my goodness," she said with a laugh. "Look how little Sofia was."

* * *

With more than half of the flight behind them, Arizona begrudgingly closed the final page of the album; she could look at these pictures forever. "Thanks for that," she said with a smile. "It was. . ."

Arizona quickly trailed off when her body suddenly felt slightly altered bumps and movements of the plane, different from the smooth ride they had experienced thus far. "Callie. . ."

Immediately noticing the change in her wife's demeanor as expressive blue eyes began to glaze over with fear, Callie quickly kneeled in her seat facing the blonde, bringing her lips close to her ear. "Just stay with me, Arizona," she patiently whispered. "Just a little bit of turbulence. But, we're okay. I'm going to keep you safe. Nothing is going to happen to you."

Arizona could only stare straight ahead, beads of sweat beginning to form on her brow, her breaths quickening in pace and her knuckles turning white from their grasp on the armrests.

"We've been through this. You know all about the sights and sounds and movements of a plane," Callie softly continued as she reached up to adjust the cool air valve, opening the nozzle full blast and directing it onto the blonde's face. "You're safe. You're going to be okay."

Arizona harshly swallowed, quickly nodding her head.

"Breathe with me. Take a deep breath - in through your nose and blow it out through your mouth - just like you're blowing Sofia and Aiden a kiss."

Arizona did as Callie instructed, the rush of cool air from above, helping to calm her heavy breathing and racing heart.

"Close your eyes," Callie urged. "Let's imagine that. . .we're on a bus."

"A Greyhound Bus?"

"Sure, a Greyhound Bus or, even better, our RV," Callie replied, her palms lovingly resting on Arizona's shoulders. "The turbulence is just like driving over a bumpy road. That's all it is."

Arizona nodded, her shoulders beginning to relax from their tensed position as Callie soothingly caressed her arms up and down.

"Good, sweetie. You're doing _awesome_. Now, talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking."

Arizona's gaze finally flicked from the back of the seat in front of her to look in Callie's direction. "I-I'm taking control," she haltingly began.

"Good, sweetie. That's good. What else?"

"I'm releasing my fear - my panic. I'm letting go of my tension a-a-and my fear and my panic. I'm taking control."

Callie smiled; they had practiced this so many times before with the help of Dr. Wyatt, and she was glad that it seemed to indeed be working. "Go on."

"I-I'm releasing my tension. I feel more relaxed. Arizona gulped for air. "Can I have some water?"

Grabbing a plastic water bottle from her purse, Callie quickly twisted the cap before handing it to her wife.

After taking a sip, Arizona let out a deep cleansing breath. "I'm okay," she stated, taking another long drag from the bottle. "I'm okay."

Callie looked around the cabin of the plane, a smile gracing her face. "That's great, sweetie," she proudly stated. "Because, we just landed."

* * *

"From the map Derek gave us, it seems like this is the spot," Callie said from the driver's seat of their rented Jeep Wrangler. "We can't drive any further. We'll have to hike."

Arizona only nodded as she opened the door, stepping from the vehicle and, grabbing a backpack from the floor of the Jeep, she threaded her arms through it and pulling it onto her shoulders.

Curiously watching her wife, Callie grabbed her own pack from the vehicle. "I can just as easily call that helicopter charter company and schedule an appointment for tomorrow if you want. I mean, are you sure we should hike it?" she cautiously asked, apprehensively glancing toward the mountainous wilderness terrain.

"Why wouldn't we hike it, Calliope? Because_ I_ only have one leg?" Arizona retorted, her tone sounding more annoyed than she had intended.

"Of course not, Arizona," Callie insisted, her tone even. "It has nothing to do with you. But, _I_ \- on the other hand _\- _am still carrying around like twelve extra pounds of baby weight and might die before we make it to the top, _and _because I'm afraid you'll leave me in the dust with that new $50,000.00 _recreational _leg of yours."

"Ha!" Arizona barked laughter and, reaching out to take Callie's hand, she took a moment to gather her thoughts. "Never in my life did I think I'd have a closet full of different legs. Different shoes, obviously. Different purses, of course. But legs? Seriously?"

"It is a pretty _sweet_ leg, though, babe," Callie contended with a smile.

"It is," Arizona admitted, returning her grin. "It really is."

Watching as Callie once again nervously glanced toward the mountain, Arizona tugged on her hand, pulling her in for a quick kiss. "You'll be fine, Calliope. We'll be fine. We're going to make it."

* * *

"Callie, hold on," Arizona called for her wife who was a few steps ahead of her.

"Oh, thank God!" Callie breathed out, leaning forward with her hands resting on her knees as she tried to catch her breath.

Recovering slightly, Callie then looked toward Arizona who silently stood taking in her surroundings. "I-is this the place?" Callie asked as she cautiously stepped closer to her wife.

Arizona didn't speak, only silently nodding her head as she reached for Callie's arm in an attempt to steady herself.

Stepping closer to support her wife's weight, Callie was certain that all aspects of time and space came to a grinding halt when her concerned brown eyes locked on frightened and emotional bright blue.

"Here. . .let's sit down," Callie gently urged as she pulled the sweatshirt that was knotted around her waist from her body to spread it out onto the forest floor.

With an obedient nod, Arizona slowly sat before Callie settled in behind her, wrapping long arms around a slip waist, their legs outstretched.

Sitting in silence for several long moments, Callie could feel the quickened pulse at Arizona's neck, her breathing slightly irregular and, gently kissing an ivory cheek, she pulled her impossibly closer, her chin now resting on Arizona's shoulder. And, as she looked out on the landscape surrounding them, Callie couldn't help the conflicting emotions that surged through her.

This place - the place that had taken so much from them - how could it possibly be so. . .beautiful? How could the breeze blow so gently through her hair? How could the sun's rays warm her skin so perfectly? How could the birds in the trees still sing? And, feeling her own heart rate speed up, Callie realized that this - this was not even close to what she had expected.

"Over there," Arizona finally said, breaking the tranquil silence and, raising her arm, she pointed in the direction of a clearing surrounded by trees. "Th-that's where I woke up."

Callie's gaze followed her wife's outstretched hand.

"They found Derek somewhere down that way."

Following her wife's every move, Callie remained sitting when Arizona suddenly stood from her seat.

"The front part of the fuselage was here," Arizona pointed to her left. "The middle was over there," she pointed in the opposite direction. "I have no idea what happened to the wings."

"It's all so. . .inconceivable," Callie remarked as she stood to follow her wife, though she purposely kept her distance. "This place is so beautiful. I just can't even fathom that something so terrible happened here."

"You know, I had that thought," Arizona admitted with a sad smile. "Especially in the mornings. The sun would rise from right over there."

Arizona pointed off to her right.

"It was breathtaking, and every single morning, I wondered how I could find this place so beautiful when I was literally sitting in the middle of so much death and destruction."

Taking Callie's hand, Arizona led her over a fallen tree, up a small embankment, and down a grassy slope.

"I'm pretty sure that's where the back of the plane ended up. That's where Lexie was. . .trapped."

Arizona squeezed her eyes shut, fending off the memories from those harrowing four days. "That's where she died," she continued once she had reopened her tear moistened eyes.

Pulling Arizona into her body and hugging her from behind, Callie then pressed a gentle kiss below her wife's right ear. "Sometimes terribly horrible things have to happen before good things can," she whispered, trying to make some sort of sense out of this awful tragedy. "You and I were made for each other, Arizona. Mark and Lexie were soul mates, too, but unlike you and me, they weren't destined to work out. Not on this earth, at least," she clarified. "They had too many things working against them, so they had to move on to another place so they have the chance to be happy together."

Arizona sighed, momentarily leaning back into Callie's embrace and, gently patting the hands resting around her waist, she then stepped from her wife's arms, carefully scrutinizing her surroundings. "Sometimes I wake up at night thinking about all the things that could have gone wrong or what could have happened," she said to no one in particular as she meandered about the crash site. "I could have died while Mark and Lexie lived. I could be paralyzed like Jerry."

Arizona paused, looking up to the sky, the afternoon sun warming her face. "We all suffered from this. Five of us narrowly escaped death, and we've had to mourn unfathomable losses."

Leaning back against a tree, Callie protectively watching her wife as she continued to process the environment around her.

"Someone should have gone for help. Someone should have searched for water. I remember hearing a stream flowing from somewhere over that way."

Arizona raised her arm, pointing to the left.

"But, I couldn't do a damn thing, Callie. I could hardly move. They were barely able to drag Mark and me under the covering of part of the plane," Arizona stated.

Shaking her head in frustration at not just her own misgivings, but at the entire situation, she then moved to the exact spot where she had sat for four long days. "All I could do was wait. So, that's exactly what I did. I waited. . .and while I waited, I thought about you and Sofia. I kept seeing your faces."

Callie took a couple steps closer to her wife, but stopped short when the blonde once again changed direction, now pacing to her left.

"At some point, I started to lose faith, and I remember hoping that someone would at least find our bodies before we could be eaten by wolves or coyotes or pecked by birds."

Callie swallowed thickly, tears beginning to well in her eyes not just at the harrowing words that she was hearing, but also because of the shear strength and determination that was currently emanating from her beautiful wife.

"I thought that if rescuers recovered our bodies - you could have a burial and then maybe some closure."

"If I had lost you, Arizona. . ." Callie softly spoke, shaking her head. "I may have buried your body, but I never would have had closure. You're it for me, Arizona Robbins. I would have carried on for Sofia, and Sofia alone."

Once again glancing around the scenic area, Arizona then focused solely on her wife and, coming to stand directly in front of her, she took her hands into hers. "There's no logic to why I lived and others didn't. No science explains why I didn't throw a clot and die. No medicine explains why I suddenly stopped coughing up blood or why I didn't slip into unconsciousness and die in silence. I'm not stronger or-or smarter or better than those who died. Why. . ."

"I don't have the answers to _why_ you were spared, Arizona, and maybe that makes me selfish, but I really don't care," Callie interrupted, unwilling to listen to her wife's defeatist words as she tucked a strand of windblown hair behind Arizona's ear.

Arizona appeared shocked by her words and, realizing she should probably clarify her momentary outburst, Callie sighed as she looked around her. "All I know is - there was a reason. Maybe it was for Sofia or-or me. Maybe it was for Aiden or the hundreds of kids you've saved since the crash. Maybe it just wasn't your time. I don't know, sweetie. No one does," Callie earnestly stated as tears began to brim in her eyes. "But, one thing I do know is - you are alive, Arizona, and you're beautiful," she continued, reaching one hand out to gently cup her wife's flawless cheek. "Life's too short to concern yourself with things you can't control. And, that's what I want for us, Arizona. I want to be able to cry when we need to, then let go when it's time. I want us to - _just live_, honey and let go of all the horrible things in our lives, so that one day, when we're old and wrinkly, we can look back with no regrets."

Arizona offered Callie a watery smile as a single tear trickled down her face, rendered completely speechless.

Taking her wife's silence as a sign that she had somehow gotten through to her, Callie tightly grasped Arizona's hand before slowly guiding her toward the area she had described as Lexie's place of death.

Pulling her backpack off her body, Callie placed it on the ground before kneeling to rummage through it and, then looking up into Arizona's crestfallen eyes, she smiled. "I-I brought a couple things. Umm. . .for Mark and Lexie."

Arizona curiously regarded her wife and, placing her left hand on Callie's strong shoulder, she supported herself as she too lowered herself to the ground.

Staring down at the items in her wife's hand, Arizona pressed her lips tightly together. "I think they'll love them," she softly replied.

Brushing a tear from her eye with the back of her hand, Callie set about dusting off the forest floor with her palm. Then arranging several rocks into a circle, she handed a picture frame to her wife.

Momentarily studying it, Arizona reverently ran her fingertip over the faces behind the glass.

On one side, the double matte frame held a photo of herself, Callie, Mark, and Lexie from their first Thanksgiving together, the other side displaying a photo of herself, Callie, Mark, and Sofia from their daughter's first birthday.

"I found these when I printed all of our pictures," Callie explained.

Carefully placing the photos inside the makeshift memorial they had just created as Callie delicately draped Mark and Lexie's stethoscopes over the frame, Arizona then leaned her head against Callie's shoulder.

Clearing her throat, Callie grasped Arizona's hand. "Shepherd me, O God. . .beyond my wants, beyond my fears. From death into life," she respectfully quoted with the sign of the cross before wrapping her arm tightly around the blonde's waist.

Lost in their own thoughts and emotions, both women remained silent, taking everything in.

"It's so unbelievable that I'm actually _here_," Arizona finally spoke, breaking the silence as she motioned to the terrain around them.

Callie lovingly studied her wife, the double meaning of her statement causing a single tear to trickle down her cheek. "All I can say is that I'm glad that you are. No matter what the reason," she said as she pulled Arizona into a tight, comforting embrace.

They stayed on the side of the mountain for a while longer, Arizona continuing to point out sites surrounding them and their significance. "It's getting late, sweetie," Callie informed a half hour later. "We need to get back to the Jeep before it gets dark."

Nodding her understanding, Arizona thankfully retrieved Callie's proffered hand.

Turning around, Callie stepped forward, leading her wife over the uneven terrain but, when they reached the spot that Arizona had described as the place where she woke up and ultimately spent most of those four days, Callie heard a hearty sob emanate from deep within her wife as the blonde released her grip on her hand.

Turning back toward her wife, Callie was saddened to see tears sliding down her cheeks, obvious distress pouring from her every feature. "Arizona. . ." she quietly said, taking a step closer to her.

Callie watched as Arizona held up her hand, halting her forward progression.

"I-I. . .I'm okay. I just. . .need a minute," Arizona insisted when she stepped away and, looking around, she sighed, feeling the sensation of the breeze blowing through her hair, the setting sun warming her upturned face.

Observing Arizona's every move with concern, but steadfast adoration, Callie fought with the compulsion to comfort her but, understanding Arizona's need to process her emotions on her own, she stood quietly for several moments as she observed the struggle present in her wife's every feature. It was a strangely amalgamated vision, for as fearful and tremulous as Arizona currently appeared, she looked almost angelic as blonde hair whipped around her head, the setting sun casting a glow upon the skin of her flawless face.

As Arizona stood motionless in the middle of the place where she had nearly died, unabashed tears slid down her face as horrific memories flashed through her mind, profoundly consuming each of her senses.

_Sight - she could see Mark lying unconscious on her lap._

_Sound - she could hear the strangled cries for help by her colleagues and the vicious snarls of wild animals as they consumed the youngest of their group._

_Taste - she could still taste the metallic flavor of blood in her parched mouth as she coughed uncontrollably._

_Smell - she could smell the fuel from the engine of the plane as it mixed with the pungent scent of the infection emanating from the open wound in her leg._

_Touch - the pain in her leg and entire body was so severe it set every single nerve ending on fire._

As quickly as her reverie began, a feeling of calm serenity soon overtook Arizona's troubled mind, forcing her fears and memories from her grasp.

And, closing her eyes, more tears fell as she inhaled deeply through her nose before slowly letting it out. Wiping at her moist cheeks, Arizona resigned herself to the fact that those four days would never be forgotten and that her heart would always be heavy when she thought of that time. Standing here now, though, finally _living_ after struggling for so long, she smiled slightly when the terrible images of her past left her mind and were replaced by thoughts and visions on her future - of her children and of her wife.

Stepping back into Callie's space, Arizona nuzzled her nose into the crook of her wife's neck and, holding Callie securely to her as she glanced around the forest, she watched as the wind stirred up fallen leaves, sweeping over the limbs of bending pine trees. Glancing up to the sky, she then smiled as she took a deep cleansing breath.

For the first time in three years, she felt that she was now truly able to put the terrible events of that harrowing time behind her. She was now able to fully comprehend and wholly appreciate her life, her family, and each day she had been given. While others had died, she could now truly say that she felt more than ever that she was ready to _live_.

* * *

"Oh God. That feels so good," Callie moaned as the warmth of the water in the large garden tub of their hotel room permeated her aching muscles. Resting comfortably against Arizona's front, she ran her fingers over the bare arms wrapped tightly around her middle, reveling in the feel of the goose bumps that arose at her touch.

Leaning her head forward, Arizona kissed her wife's temple, then brushed her lips gently along her jawline before nipping at the sensitive skin below her earlobe. "Thank you for today. I really needed it. More than I knew."

Callie turned her head, capturing soft, pink lips with her own. "I think we both needed it," she simply stated when she pulled away. "I can't say Boise is on my top ten list of vacation spots - probably doesn't even make the top fifty," she jokingly teased. "But, I'm glad we came."

Arizona chuckled softly, her fingertips lightly grazing over turgid nipples before cupping both breasts in her hands. "Babies make these even more spectacular than they were before," she sensuously commented, completely changing the subject as she kissed her wife's neck, pinching each hardened bud, her hands delicately holding their weight.

Callie shivered at her wife's pleasing touch. "Our babies make _everything_ spectacular," she replied, her head falling backward onto Arizona's shoulder as her wife continued the ministrations of her tongue and mouth against her neck, one ivory hand trailing down caramel flesh to cup the soft mound of her sex.

Pulling her wife even closer to her, Arizona pressed her own aching breasts firmly against the long muscles of her wife's back, aroused nipples caressing taut shoulder blades.

"Only a couple more months, though," Callie husked, her hips lifting to press her center firmly against Arizona's hand. "Then they'll be back to normal, but at least you won't have to share them with Aiden."

Arizona seductively smirked as she ran the middle finger of her right hand gently along Callie's slit and, wrapping her right leg over that of her wife, she then pressed her own hips forward, seeking the erotic friction she so desperately desired.

"No more talking about our children, Calliope. It's not really appropriate in our current situation," Arizona provocatively teased as she laced the fingers of her left hand through the caramel one of her lover, bringing their joined hands to rest beneath magnificent breasts.

Callie nodded in acknowledgment, spreading her legs as wide as the tub would allow when Arizona began rubbing two fingers in exaggerated circles over her eager clit, her eyes closed but her mouth slightly agape.

"You're so hot, baby," Arizona husked into her ear. "I can't stop touching you."

"I-I don't mind," Callie stammered, her hips rocking with the rhythm of her wife's deliberate strokes. "In fact, please don't ever_ stop_ touching me."

Arizona chuckled against the soft skin of Callie's arched neck as she pressed her fingers more firmly against a heated clit. And, as loud, sharp gasps of pure bliss began rushing from Callie's mouth, she then moved her attention from her engorged nub, plunging two fingers deep inside her wife, her motions slow at first, but soon becoming faster and more urgent. "I'm going to make you scream so hard, baby," she seductively promised, her pelvis rocking against Callie's ass.

Callie's hand tightened its grip on the fingers interlaced with her own, her breathing becoming heavier as Arizona nipped and sucked at her pulse point, her talented fingers continuing their agonizing work. "Fuck! Don't stop!" she groaned. "You feel so good inside me. Please don't stop!"

Callie panted harshly as beads of sweat, mixed with bath water, started to drip down the side of her face and, catching a droplet of moisture with her tongue, Arizona's body thrust against Callie's as she torturously slid her fingers out from within slick depths to caress swollen folds.

The tip of Arizona's middle finger then grazed over Callie's erect clit before briefly rubbing furious circles over it.

"Please, Arizona. Please," Callie begged in a husky whisper as she neared her breaking point. "Make me come."

"Dirty mouth. . ."

"No kids here," Callie managed in a breathy exhalation.

Sensing her lover's need, Arizona plunged in deeper, burying her fingers inside Callie's slick opening before pausing momentarily, slowly withdrawing and immediately thrusting them back in again. She stimulated her wife deeper and deeper as Callie's hips bucked and writhed in a frenzied rush and, curling her fingers to deliberately massage the spot deep within, Arizona tipped her head forward, forcing Callie to turn toward her so she could claim her lips, her tongue stroking the recesses of her mouth.

In a wild eruption of ecstasy, Callie's back arched, a low guttural moan coming from deep in her chest as her body shuddered, her core contracting with uncontrollable spasms as unadulterated pleasure surged through her. "Arizona!" she screamed in uninhibited satisfaction, her left hand clutching that of her wife, her right hooking behind her to grasp at the hair at the back of the blonde's head.

Nuzzling her nose against Callie's neck as her body continued to tremble, Arizona stilled her fingers when the Latina's orgasm subsided. "I told you I'd make you scream," she breathed before tirelessly moving her fingers once more.

After a few more well placed strokes, Callie's eyes rolled into the back of her head as she again cried out, her body stiffening as a second earth shattering climax consumed her.

Arizona gently caressed Callie's thighs and abdomen with one hand, the other continuing to hold her tightly and, whispering hushed promises and I love yous into her ear, she lovingly coaxed her down from her orgasmic high.

Taken completely by surprise, Arizona could only comply when Callie quickly turned in her arms, water sloshing up over the side of the tub and splashing to the floor as she pushed her body upward to sit on the wide ledge of the tub.

Slowly kissing down her stomach, Callie pressed her legs open as she nudged her nose against the delectable clit she could see peeking out from under its hood. Resting her tongue against it, she looked up at her wife, her tongue never straying from its motionless position. "I can feel you throbbing against my tongue," Callie husked before languidly swirling it through slippery wet folds.

Arizona grasped at her own flushed breasts, her head falling back against the tiles of the bath as her hips arched with abandon, longing to feel her own blinding, pulsing moment of release.

Smirking against the velvety smooth skin of her wife's core, Callie's hot mouth soon strayed from its moist depths to worship Arizona's inner thighs with insistent bites and sucks.

"Don't be a tease," Arizona demanded as she laced her hands through thick brunette tresses, harshly tugging her wife's head toward her pulsating core to unceremoniously force her face deeper into her tight womanhood. "Now. I need you to make me come _right now_," she insisted, her grasp on her wife's head unrelenting. "Make me come, Calliope. Fuck me and make me come!"

Despite Arizona's desperation, and beyond the fact that Callie thought her wife's lusty words sounded hot as hell as they fell from her lips, Callie didn't rush - she didn't immediately acquiesce to her wife's demands. This was the most uninhibited the brunette had seen her wife in way too long and, as sexy as that was, she wanted to take her time – to make the most of Arizona's new found freedom. So, instead of heeding Arizona's insistence, Callie gently spread damp folds with her thumb and index finger, teasing her wife's clit with light flicks of her tongue.

Watching as her lover's center visibly clenched, Callie then ran her tongue from her entrance all the way up to her bundle of nerves. But, instead of focusing on that aching nub as she knew Arizona needed her to do, Callie instead sucked at both outer lips before burying her pointed tongue deep inside her.

"Oh God, Callie!" Arizona moaned, sharply pulling at dark hair as her hips began bucking and writhing in a perfect rhythm with Callie as she fucked her with her tongue.

With Arizona's hips writhing with abandon, Callie had to pin her down with her arms to keep her in place and, when she felt tight internal muscles begin to pulsate around her tongue, Callie quickly withdrew before immediately entering her with a singular driving thrust of two fingers as she simultaneously sucked an engorged clit into her mouth.

"Oh my God! Yes, Callie! Fuck me, baby!" Arizona screamed as she violently ground her hips against the Latina's face.

And, with one final groan, Arizona's eyes slammed shut, her thighs clamping tightly around Callie's head as her world exploded with a blood-rushing climax.

Callie lapped at the slippery essence that continued poured from her wife's hot core as Arizona rode the waves of sheer ecstasy, goosebumps covering her wet body and she shuddered with each pulsating wave of pleasure.

"Oh my God," Arizona hoarsely breathed when Callie looked up at her, smirking sexily as she pulled her back into the now tepid water with a splash.

Now kneeling in front of her wife with their tender breasts thrust together, Callie urgently slipped her hot tongue into her Arizona's mouth.

Moaning at the intoxicating flavor of herself on Callie's lips, Arizona sucked her wife's tongue, reveling in her own heady essence that lingered there.

When they finally pulled away for air, Callie arched a perfectly manicured eyebrow, giggling at the pleasantly dazed look on the blonde's face. "Talk about a dirty mouth. . ." she teased before stepping from the bath and wrapping herself in a plush terrycloth robe.

Then moving to assist her wife into standing, Callie wrapped a second robe around Arizona's damp form and, after helping her from the tub, she then firmly pressed her against a wall of the bathroom.

"I think we need to take advantage of this one night we have away," Callie husked into Arizona's ear before once again capturing her mouth with hungry urgency.

Finally returning to her senses, Arizona offered her wife a sexy smile. "What?" _Peck. _"Did?" _Peck. _"You have?" _Peck. _"In mind?"

Callie chuckled as her hand slid beneath the material of the blonde's robe to possessively caress the silky ivory skin of Arizona's abdomen. "I'm about to show you."

* * *

A week later, Arizona navigated their BMW X5 up the driveway and into the garage, groaning softly when she looked at the digital clock on the console.

1:37am.

Her uneventful twelve hour shift had gone terribly wrong when a half hour before its end a busload of high school baseball players collided with an eighteen wheeler. She and Karev had worked feverishly on the six injured athletes and now seven hours and zero casualties later, she dragged her exhausted body from the vehicle.

Grabbing her bag from the back seat of the car, Arizona trudged through the garage and into the house, the faint smell of chocolate assaulting her senses as she recalled that they had agreed to take brownies to daycare the following day.

Smiling at the thought of Sofia _helping _in the endeavor, she pictured the four year old licking excess chocolate from a wooden spoon, her face covered with the sweet dessert as Aiden sat happily banging spoons and spatulas against the tray of his high chair.

Arizona sighed, saddened by the fact that she had not only missed out on some baking with her family, but also that she had missed out on dinner time - bath time, story time, and bedtime, as well.

Using the light over the kitchen sink to safely guide her way toward the winding staircase, she sighed when she reached the top of the stairs. First peeking into the Jungle Safari themed nursery, expecting to see Aiden resting peacefully in his crib, she only found an empty room and, assuming Callie had the baby with her in the master bedroom, she tiredly meandered further down the hallway to check on Sofia. Surprised to find her bed empty as well, Arizona finally pushed open the door to the master bedroom, her breath hitching at the vision before her.

In the center of the king size bed, Callie slept propped up against the headboard, Aiden's tiny body protectively secured against her chest with one arm, the other wrapped round Sofia as the little girl snuggled into her side.

Stepping further into the room, Arizona smiled at the sight before toeing off her shoes and guiding her jeans down her legs. Then settling her exhausted body into her wheelchair, she pulled off her prosthesis, deliberately massaging the aching limb before propelling herself to the dresser to gather her pajamas on her way to the en suite bathroom.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Arizona re-emerged to find her family in the exact position as before and, quietly wheeling to her side of the bed, she gingerly transferred herself to the edge of the mattress before settling herself comfortably under the plush duvet.

Feeling the bed move under her, Callie reflexively held Aiden closer to her, protectively running her hand up and down his back. And, blinking several times, her eyes finally opened as she looked to her right to make sure Sofia was safe beside her.

The weary, but sparkling blue eyes Callie then found watching her as an ivory hand stroked their daughter's belly caused a genuine smile to tug at her lips. "Hey," she whispered through a fog of sleep.

"Hey," Arizona replied as she leaned up on her elbow to kiss her cheek.

"We missed you," Callie stated as she glanced between their children. "What happened with the baseball players?"

"I missed you, too." Arizona replied with a sigh. ". . .they all made it. Every single one of them, she proudly stated. "Did you have a rough night?"

Callie chuckled softly, rolling her eyes. "There was sugar and flour all over the kitchen, and Sofia literally had chocolate from head to toe when I finally got her into the bath."

"You made the brownies from scratch?" Arizona asked in surprise. "I would have just made them from the box."

Callie scoffed. "So not my style, babe," she teasingly replied with a laugh. "And besides, Little Miss insisted on calling Grammy for her recipe."

Arizona chuckled at the thought of her mother assisting Sofia with the baking. "How was Aiden?" she asked as she ran her hand along the soft dark hair at the back of his head.

"Perfect, of course," Callie remarked as she looked down at his sleeping form. Then sitting up, she started to scoot toward the edge of the bed. "I'll take him to the nursery."

Arizona bit her bottom lip, momentarily fighting with herself before giving in to her thoughts. "No, wait," she hesitantly urged. "I didn't get to spend any time with them today. Can they stay here? Just for a little while?"

Callie turned around, smiling at the request. "Sure," she said with a shrug as she carefully handed the sleeping baby to his momma. Settling him onto the mattress between herself and his sister, Arizona snuggled into her pillow, her hand resting protectively against his chest.

Flicking off the bedside lamp, their room now dimly lit by the silvery glow of the moon and the street lights below, Callie then reached across Sofia with her left arm to gently rest her palm against the back of Arizona's hand. And, drawing random patterns over a wrist with her thumb, brown eyes soon locked with the gorgeous cerulean ones of the woman she loved.

"Goodnight, sweetie," Callie whispered.

"Goodnight, Calliope," Arizona replied in a hushed whisper. "I love you."

A smile tugged at the corners of full lips. "I love you, too."

* * *

**AN2: **Thanks so much for your support of this story. I hope you enjoyed it and thanks for sticking around from start to finish!


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